316: “Don’t Suffer Twice”

Today’s solo riff is on a three-word phrase that has helped quell countless waves of anxiety in the decade since I first heard it, wisdom passed from my friend Monica McCarthy's (aka MonBon’s) mom then to the pages of Pivot. Pardon the occasional panting (lol) and background noise—err New York City soundscape—as I recorded this one on a big hill at the park, running up and down while throwing a giant log for Ryder to chase. He chases sticks, I chase ideas!

🌟 3 Key Takeaways:

Memento Mori, though it is by definition morbid, is a practice of reminding ourselves that we (and our loved ones) will die. As the monks at Wat Umong temple hand-wrote on a note posted to a tree, “Remember: In 100 years, all new people.” How can you allow this reality to inform how you engage in relationships without leading to excessive anxiety or worry?

The Second Arrow: Notice when you are suffering because of a story you are telling yourself after a painful event, grinding the gears of a problem and making it worse long after the fact.

Remember, “Worry is praying for what you don’t want.” Try not to worry for or about others either; it’s not a nice energy to project or to feel.

✅ Next Action: If you notice yourself worrying or anxious, try to remind yourself of those three little words from MonBon's mom: Don't suffer twice.

📚Books Mentioned

Life After College

Pivot: The Only Move That Matters Is Your Next One

Free Time: Lose The Busywork, Love Your Business

The Examined Life: How We Lose and Find Ourselves by Stephen Grosz

When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times by Pema Chodron

Outrageous Openness: Letting the Divine Take the Lead by Tosha Silver

Change Me Prayers: The Hidden Power of Spiritual Surrender by Tosha Silver

🔗 Resources

Articles: Many Animals—Including Your Dog—May Have Horrible Short-Term Memories, Memento Mori, The Second Arrow

People: Monica McCarthy, Tosha Silver, Penney Peirce

🎧 Related Podcast Episodes

Pivot:

312: Are You Future-Tripping?

Jenny & Penney Show (Spotify playlist)

Slow Cooked vs. Pressure Cooker

Free Time:

170: 🌈 “Imagine a World of Abundance” ✨

172: Free Time Isn’t Just for the Fun Days

138: ⛵️ Stop Sailing the Sea of Shiny Shoulds

❤️ Enjoying the show? I'd be grateful for a rating and/or review! Even better? Share this episode with a friend :)
💌 Get my curated weekly(ish) PivotList newsletter
💻 Check out Jenny’s Pivot courses on LinkedIn Learning: Figuring Out Your Next Move, Holding 1:1 Career Conversations With Your Team, Managing Introverts, Coaching New Hires, and Coaching New Managers
💬 I’d love to hear what’s on your mind! Take the Pivot listener survey
☎️ Submit a question or comment for future episodes
🎧 Make sure you’re subscribed wherever you listen to podcasts
📝 Check out full show notes from this episode with links to resources mentioned at http://pivotmethod.com/316
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today’s solo riff is on a three-word phrase that has helped quell countless waves of anxiety in the decade since I first heard it, wisdom passed from my friend Monica McCarthy's (aka MonBon’s) mom then to the pages of Pivot. Pardon the occasional panting (lol) and background noise—err New York City soundscape—as I recorded this one on a big hill at the park, running up and down while throwing a giant log for Ryder to chase. He chases sticks, I chase ideas!

🌟 3 Key Takeaways:

Memento Mori, though it is by definition morbid, is a practice of reminding ourselves that we (and our loved ones) will die. As the monks at Wat Umong temple hand-wrote on a note posted to a tree, “Remember: In 100 years, all new people.” How can you allow this reality to inform how you engage in relationships without leading to excessive anxiety or worry?

The Second Arrow: Notice when you are suffering because of a story you are telling yourself after a painful event, grinding the gears of a problem and making it worse long after the fact.

Remember, “Worry is praying for what you don’t want.” Try not to worry for or about others either; it’s not a nice energy to project or to feel.

✅ Next Action: If you notice yourself worrying or anxious, try to remind yourself of those three little words from MonBon's mom: Don't suffer twice.

Life After College

Pivot: The Only Move That Matters Is Your Next One
Free Time: Lose The Busywork, Love Your Business
The Examined Life: How We Lose and Find Ourselves by Stephen Grosz
When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times by Pema Chodron
Outrageous Openness: Letting the Divine Take the Lead by Tosha Silver
Change Me Prayers: The Hidden Power of Spiritual Surrender by Tosha Silver

🔗 Resources

Articles: Many Animals—Including Your Dog—May Have Horrible Short-Term Memories, Memento Mori, The Second Arrow

People: Monica McCarthy, Tosha Silver, Penney Peirce

🎧 Related Podcast Episodes

Pivot:
312: Are You Future-Tripping?
Jenny & Penney Show (Spotify playlist)
Slow Cooked vs. Pressure Cooker

Free Time:
170: 🌈 “Imagine a World of Abundance” ✨
172: Free Time Isn’t Just for the Fun Days
138: ⛵️ Stop Sailing the Sea of Shiny Shoulds

❤️ Enjoying the show? I'd be grateful for a rating and/or review! Even better? Share this episode with a friend :)

💌 Get my curated weekly(ish) PivotList newsletter

💻 Check out Jenny’s Pivot courses on LinkedIn Learning: Figuring Out Your Next Move, Holding 1:1 Career Conversations With Your Team, Managing Introverts, Coaching New Hires, and Coaching New Managers

💬 I’d love to hear what’s on your mind! Take the Pivot listener survey

☎️ Submit a question or comment for future episodes

🎧 Make sure you’re subscribed wherever you listen to podcasts

📝 Check out full show notes from this episode with links to resources mentioned at http://pivotmethod.com/316

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices