REPLAY: One More Thing I Wished I'd Said

In this episode, Leah finishes explaining Polyvagal Theory, and how the ladder helps us understand the state we and our kids are in - Safe and Connected, Fight or Flight, or Collapse/Shut down. The sisters talk about the importance of us staying in "Safe and Connected" so we can bring our kids with us, into the only state where they can actually hear us, listen to us, follow directions, and solve problems. We must pay attention to and insert cues of safety for our kids, such as tone of voice, posture, and facial expressions.

It's important  that we remain a safe place for our kids, so we can hear the "stories" they tell themselves so we can correct them, validate them, and help them problem solve situations that are uncomfortable or difficult. As parents, we have to remain curious to uncover what their behavior is actually trying to communicate, and trust that if it doesn't make sense, their nervous system is doing what it thinks is best to keep them safe.

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