Pairadocs

Four Horsemen of the Marriage Apocalypse: In Laws

Well, this week the guys wrap up their discussion of the Four Horsemen of the Marriage Apocalypse with the dreaded In Laws!  How should couples manage this minefield of family tension?  And not only are the guys ending this series this week, sadly, Josh and Jimmy are ending their run as the Pairadocs.  This will be the boys last show.  Sad, but exciting.  Listen in and find out why.  BTW, all of you guys are the best!  We love you. -----     -----   Dr. Jimmy Myers on Twitter: @do...

Monday, December 28th, 2020

Four Horsemen of the Marriage Apocalypse: Money

So, are you ready to meet the 3rd Horseman of the Marriage Apocalypse?  Couple's fight about this one all the time!  This topic reeks of power and security, therefore, it's a source for, all but constant, conflict.  The topic?  MONEY!  "Sooooo, let's get ready to RUMBLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" ----- Dr. Jimmy Myers on Twitter: @docjimmymyers, Instagram: @jmyersfam, and Facebook: @docjimmymyers   Pairadocs Podcast on Twitter: @docspodcast, Instagram: @docspodcast, and Facebook: @docspodca...

Four Horsemen of the Marriage Apocalypse: Kids

Last week, the guys kicked off a discussion of the Four Horsemen of the Marriage Apocalypse.  The first was sex, and this week they will examine the all too hot topic of THE KIDS.  Most couples tend not to be on the exact same page when it comes to discipline, expectations, and priorities when it comes to their kids, so...arguments tend to ensue.  If this sounds like you, don't miss this week's episode!   ----- Dr. Jimmy Myers on Twitter: @docjimmymyers, Instagram: @jmyersfam, and Facebo...

Four Horsemen of the Marriage Apocalypse: Sex

You know it coming and you dread it like the plague, but at some point, in every family there comes the need to have “The Sex Talk.”  In this case, however, we’re not talking about the sex discussion with you kids.  This week, the guys delve into the sex talk that every couple needs to have and keep having to address one of the Four Horsemen of the Marriage Apocalypse.    ----- PROBLEM: Carries more baggage than a 747.  Mention any possible negative and it can be interpreted as a very i...

The Argument Black Hole

Have you or your spouse ever said something along the lines of, “We argue over little things.”, or “None of our arguments ever get resolved.”  If you have, then you have fallen headfirst into the Argument Black Hole.  Join them this week, as the guys talk about the biggest mistake couples make when they have a disagreement. -----  PROBLEM: Arguing over facts Arguing over who’s reality is correct Winning is more important than solving the problem My Side Bias skews facts Memories...

Perfectionism In The Home

Perfectionism.  Most would agree that this personality trait is not great.  BUT, if you are a perfectionist, you secretly, sort of, like being this way.  It’s kind of like being a “workaholic.”  We say we don’t like that aspect of our lives yet are inwardly proud of how much we can accomplish.  Perfectionism is, not only, bad for us as an individual, but can be devastating in our home.   ----- PROBLEM: See it in: Kids- upset if not perfect, performance anxiety Mom/Wives- Clean house,...

The Push

We’ve all seen them, haven’t we?  Those parents who care WAY too much about how their child is doing in sports.  They take out a second mortgage and blow through their family’s savings just to keep their kid on select/travel teams.  They yell at the refs, the coach, and their kid.  You would think their entire self-worth hinged on whether their child plays well and wins the game…hmmm.  I wonder… Listen in this week as Josh and Jimmy get the signal, step up to the plate, and discuss The Push....

Dysfunctional Families

We hear a lot of talk about dysfunctional families these days.  Apparently, they are bad, and can cause some real damage to those who find themselves in one.  But is my family dysfunctional? Did I come from one?  How do I make sure my family doesn’t become one?  I’m glad you asked!!  Join the fellas this week and they discussion what dysfunctional families are, how to prevent them, and what to do if you fear you’re in one. -----  Problem with dysfunction: Long lasting impact.  Consisten...

Outsourcing Your Child’s Spiritual Development

Ever feel like a spiritual taxi driver? Is your goal as a parent to make sure your child is at every church event? Do you get nervous when asked to spiritual lead / guide your child? When your child has a spiritual question, is this intimidating? This week Jimmy and Josh discuss your one job as a parent, spiritually leading your child. -----   Harelips the Governor    Pagan Christianity by Barna   Other than praying over dinner or before bed, is God present in your life / your...

Raising Humble Kids

As the late great country music artist, Mac Davis, once sang, “Oh, Lord, it’s hard to be humble!”  And in our current culture and the competitive, “me-obsessed” environment that our kids are growing up in, these words have never been more spot on.  Join the fellas this week, as they kick around the topic of raising humble kids. -----  We live in a culture that is for the glorification of self. Our culture and a lot of our homes struggle to produce humble kids. “If you have to toot your...

Protect Young Minds

Many of you have read her books to your kids and found them to be an invaluable resource during this unprecedented electronically connected time. And if you haven’t read these books to your kids, after listening to this show, you definitely will. This week Jimmy and Josh sit down with Kristen Jenson, from Protect Young Minds, about her best-selling books, Good Pictures Bad Pictures and her newest, Good Pictures Bad Pictures Jr.When should we talk to our children about pornography? To quote K...

The Big Boo Pairadocs Cast

You know ‘em! You love ‘em! And you can’t live without ‘em! I don’t know the numbers on their jerseys, but I do know they’re number 1 in your heart...drum roll, please...This week, the boys sit down with Melanie Shankle and Sophie Hudson, the co-hosts of the Big Boo Cast! They talk about the ladies’ new books, life, love, and not to give too much away...pheasant hunting fashion tips. The Big Boo Cast Melanie Shankle Sophie Hudson Opal Nugget Ice Maker Stand All the Way Up by Sophie...

Putting a Lid on Parental Anger

I know you’ve never said this before, but I’m sure you’ve known someone who has exclaimed, “That kid makes me so mad!!”  Anger is an emotion that all parents have experienced, yet parental anger that is expressed in the wrong way can be the most destructive emotional element in any home.  Ouch.  This week, the guys chat about putting a lid on parental anger.   ----- Series 33 – Lifeway Problem with parental anger: Things that we say and do that we regret are mostly done in anger Par...

Intimacy: What Is It & Why Is It Important

What do apparently all of us want, but seemingly not many of us actually have? You may answer, million dollars! And you would be right!!...However, I was being less crass and materialistic and was referencing the often sought-after quality known as Intimacy.We want it in our friendships, our marriages, our families, and our walk with God, but for something that seems to be so crucial, most of us don’t even know what Intimacyactually is, and why, in reality, it is extraordinarily important. ...

When Your Child Feels Rejected

Has you child ever come home, upset because the kids at school were being mean to them? Don’t you hate that?! Not only does it break your heart, but peer rejection could also actually have a long-term negative impact on their lives. Join in this week as the guys discuss how to respond when your child is rejected by their peers. And it does not include sobbing uncontrollably.

Undeserved Praise

Is unconditionally loving your child and unconditionally praising your child the same thing?  Maybe not.  In fact, numerous studies indicate that lavishing praise on a child with little or no merit, actually can have a negative impact on the child’s emotional development.  But then again, no praise could indicate emotion emotional neglect.  What’s a parent to do?!  It’s like we’re danged if we do, or danged if we don’t. Listen in this week as Josh and Jimmy delve into the sticky, and somew...

Welcome to Christian Parenting Podcast Network

Pairadocs podcast has joined the Christian Parenting Podcast Network! If this is your first episode, here are a few episodes to get you started: https://pairadocspodcast.libsyn.com/bob-goff https://pairadocspodcast.libsyn.com/empathy https://pairadocspodcast.libsyn.com/pornography Follow Dr. Jimmy Myers on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook. Follow Dr. Josh Myers on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook. Follow Pairadocs Podcast on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook. How do give to the ...

How Honest Is Too Honest

Since we’re all doing school from home now, please answer the following questions:   Honey, do these new pants make my butt look big? No, I left your gift at the office.  Do you really think I’d forget our anniversary? Mommy, are some of the kids on my team better than me? Daddy, I’m so sad that Fluffy died.  Is he in heaven with Jesus? Hey, Babe, I can’t see the back of my head.  Am I balding at all?   So how did you do?  Answer honestly.  This week, the guys kick around the topic...

If You Loved Me

We’ve all done it.  Looked at how our spouse is behaving and wondered, “Wow, if he really loved me, he wouldn’t be doing that.”  Some of us have felt that so strongly that we actually say those word to our spouse.  Making their momentary behavior a referendum on “if” they love us or not.  Full disclosure, I have done this myself.  Just the other night I told my wife, Beth, “If you really loved me, you wouldn’t make me watch the Downtown Abby movie a second time.”  Wow, that felt good.  Freed...

Apologizing

I’m so sorry its taken so long to get this episode out, BUT there were many reasons why it couldn’t get done sooner…Listen, I said I was sorry.  What do you want from me?  You feel hurt that we have kept this life-changing podcast from you for this long?  Well, I’m sorry you feel that way.  To hurt you was not our intent, so really, you have to own your own feelings.  Am I right?  Ok, fine, drop it.  This week the boys discuss how to make a real apology.    -----   Apologies are norm...

What if They Don't Launch

Here’s a parent’s worst nightmare.  You look upstairs one day and your 27 year old son is still living in the same bedroom in your house that he occupied since the 8th grade!  Somewhere along the line, this young man…failed to launch.  Listen in this week as the guys discuss this growing phenomenon.    -----   Helicopter parenting - hovering over your child to rescue whenever bad happens Lawnmower parenting - clearing the path for your child so that nothing bad happens to them   ...

Boundries

The boys follow up with their co dependency talk from last week by discussing boundaries today. What are boundaries? How do you institute them? Won't that make matters worse? Listen in.   -----   Boundariless families are dysfunctional. These families are tired.  Lack of boundaries finds its way into most, if not all, relational problems we have.   We mistakenly believe that if we set a boundary, it is unloving.   10 Laws of Boundaries   1. Law of sowing and reaping - n...

Boundaries

The boys follow up with their co dependency talk from last week by discussing boundaries today. What are boundaries? How do you institute them? Won't that make matters worse? Listen in.   -----   Boundariless families are dysfunctional. These families are tired.  Lack of boundaries finds its way into most, if not all, relational problems we have.   We mistakenly believe that if we set a boundary, it is unloving.   10 Laws of Boundaries   1. Law of sowing and reaping - n...

Co-Dependency

What is co-dependency?  We’ve all heard about, accused others of being it, but what exactly is it?  I mean, we should depend on each other…right?  “Lean on me, when you’re not strong…”  Hello?!  But what is it, really?  Listen in this week as the guys unpack the sometimes misunderstood topic of co-dependency, and see if you can recognize your relationship…uh, I mean recognized a “friend’s” relationship.    -----   Enchiladas Y Mas Closed   Co dependency = when one person needs an...

Accepting Spouse's Flaws

In our society today, we love us some tolerance! Vive la Difference! I always like to say, except when those differences we’re “Viveing” are behaviors in our spouse that are driving us up the wall during this sheltering in place experience.  How can we “let go and let God” sooth our relational differences while we’re all boarded up inside our houses 24/7?  Listen in this week as the guys discuss how to accept our spouse’s faults…That’s right.  I said it, FAULTS! They’re not differences, they...

When Storms Strike

What happens when things don't go as expected? When God doesn't make sense? When our worst fears are realized? What then? How do we respond? What's more, how do we lead our family/kids during such a time? Listen in this week as the guys discuss how to handle the storm when it hits.   -----   As parents, we set the emotional tone within the home.    When something bad happens, it's not simply about you, surviving. But as a parent, it is about modeling to our children how to handle...

COVID Couple

I know we discussed last week some ideas on how to cope with the entire family being at home due to the COVID, but what about working with, playing with, eating every meal with, parenting with, sitting and relaxing with, and every other activity you can think of with your  spouse…every day, all day, with no breaks.  Sounds fantastic right?!  Or does it sound like you might need a case of Xanax airlifted to your location.  So, what are some practical ideas for how to cope with sharing your ev...

COVID-19

Okay, the COVID…how do we NOT talk about this?  We’re all now working from home, schooling from home, going to church from home, and oh yea, performing all other human activity during every waking moment…from home.  So how do we make it through?  Other than monitoring Twitter all day?  Listen in this week, as the guys discuss ways to cope with the COVID confinement.  I mean, what else ya got to do?   -----   5 Things Your Family Can Do During COVID   1. Turn off the news   2....

Oppressive Christianity

So, you're talking with a friend about something other than the COVID, and your Christian faith comes up.  The friend mentions that they have a huge problem with all of the evil that has been done in the name of God throughout history, and that most Christians today seem to be homophobes, xenophobes, transphobes, and, well, you get the picture.  How do we respond?  How do we teach our kids to respond?  The boys are back this week to offer some very kind, sympathetic, non-abrasive, nor phobic...

Family Rituals

You know what really sticks with you…other than a foot fungus?  When it comes to our families, the answer is rituals or traditions.  Things that are said and done consistently, frequently, that span over a long duration.  Going to church and small group a couple of times a month is good, but there’s a reason that only 32% of kids raised in evangelical homes stay believers as adults.  This week the guys kick around the issue of family rituals, the glue that can help hold faiths and families t...

On Death and Dying

It’s been said that there are only two things that are a certainty in this life: Death and Taxes…well, and you could also add the Dallas Cowboys losing in the first round of the playoffs.  But your family is going face the death of a grandparent, family member, or friend at some point.  That IS a certainty.  So, how do we guide our families through this very sad, scary, and confusing life experience?  Listen in this week.  This discussion is to die for…sorry.   -----   Give yourself ...

Wisdom for Mid Life

It is easy to freak your freak in mid life. This moment, that you've been looking forward to your whole life. You have the spouse. The kids. The job. The house. But it can still feel empty.    But what if this is as good as it gets?   What do you do then? Listen in as the boys discuss.   -----   Wisdom is having the right perspective. It is fighting the feeling of being trapped!  There is purpose in mid life   We must accept that this is mid life. It's not perfect, but ...

Love Anyway

Like a foot fungus you just can’t seem to get rid of…the boys are back with all new episodes for the new year!  And they kick it off with this little gem.  Question:  Would you love a spouse that was gentle, loving, kind, generous, engaged, compassionate, and absolutely couldn’t keep their hands off you?  WELL WHO WOULDN’T!!!  Anybody would love a spouse like that.  The trick is to be able to love a spouse that isn’t like that.  As believers, we’re not called to love our spouse “because”, b...

Empathy

What if there was one thing that would make most, if not all, family conflicts lessen, of not end.   What would pay for get ahold of the “magic bullet” of relational harmony?  Well get out your credit cards my friends, because this week, the guys discuss the all-important issue of empathy.  This one little touchy-feely word can go a long way toward reducing marital, occupational, and parental conflict.  How do I know?  Because I can feel your pain…   -----   Brene Brown on Empathy ...

Talking Tragedy with Kids

The tragedy of a mass shooting.  It’s all over the news.  Everybody is talking about it, political blame is flying back and forth, and there sits our kids.  Scared, confused, and in some cases, completely ignorant of the events swirling around them.  So how do we best discuss unimaginable evil with our kids and keep their innocents intact?  Not sure that's possible, but listen in as Jimmy and Josh tackle talking tragedy with our children.    -----   Luby's Shooting in Killeen   T...

Drowning in Politics

If you are as sick of politics as I am, raise your hand, right there where you are…yes, God bless you…yes, I see that hand.  Are there any others?  With the current political climate and ever-present social media bombarding our every waking moment, we can’t get away from politics, even if we wanted to.  Every song, TV show, movie, sporting event, etc. has comments, demonstrations, or snide political comments.  IT JUST NEVER ENDS!!  Join the fellas this week, as they examine, how we as believ...

Self Image

When you look in the mirror, what do you see?  What does your child see?  How does our body image impact the way we perceive ourselves and how we perceive others perceive us…I may have used the word, “perceive” one too many times?  Our self-image has an enormous influence on the quality of our lives and the lives of our children, yet how we determine that self-image can make us fickle at best and be damaging at it’s worst.  Join the guys this week as they look at how we view our physical sel...

Isolation

You’ve heart it said that it is not good for man to be alone.  Well, this week, the guys explore exactly why that is.  This is not about being single, or the benefits of “alone time.”  It’s about the pervasive, negative impact of toxic isolation in both individuals, couples, and families.  So, in keeping with the theme, listen to this episode in a large group of your closest friends! -----   "pathology, sin, addiction breeds in isolation"   "The fruit of the spirit will never breed...

Movies for Parenting Daughters

This week the guys talk through essential movies to watch with your daughters. Whether you're a dad or mom, watch these movies with your girls. Through these movies you can help them learn healthy feminine traits.    -----   History Lovers Club on Twitter   Top 10 Movies for Girls: 1. Parent Trap 2. Mean Girls 3. Princess Diaries 4. Freaky Friday 5. Moana 6. Brave  7. Wizard of Oz 8. Frozen 9. A League of Their Own 10. Soul Surfer     ----- Dr. Jimmy M...

Porn: What Do We Do?

After three episodes dealing with the devastating impact of pornography on a person’s life.  The boys thought that a wrap up session was in order.  What are some practical step to elevate this problem?  Listen in and find out… -----   www.brainheartworld.org Part 1 - how porn impacts our brain Part 2 - how porn impacts our relationships Part 3 - how porn impacts the world   You have to get real with someone besides the men in your life. Pornography is infidelity. Any sex ...

Porn: The World

A lot of great things come in threes.  The number of outs in an inning or baseball, how many branches of government the USA has, not to mention the number of personalities that make up the holy Trinity.  But don’t forget to add to that list the number of episodes in the current Pairadocs series on the adverse effects that pornography has on the mind, relationships…and this week the world.  Please view the third video in the series found at www.mindheartworld.org and join in the discussion of...

Porn: The Heart

This week the guys are halfway through their three-part series on one of our favorite topics…pornography.  Hopefully, by now you’ve all gone to www.mindheartworld.org and watched the first two episodes of this groundbreaking documentary about the colossally negative impact that porn has on all that view it.  This week, we will thoroughly examine part two; how viewing pornography all but prevents a person from establishing or maintaining close personal relationships.  One may say, “So what?! ...

Porn: The Brain

Welcome to a new three-part series of Pairadocs.  We don’t do this very often, but in leu of the most recent research establishing the fact that over 8 in 10 of young men between the ages of 20 and 29 are viewing hardcore pornography weekly…I did say, weekly!  We felt compelled to address this issue once again.  We need you to go to www.brainheartworld.org.  This is an amazing three-part video series produced by an amazing organization called Fight The New Drug.  Follow them on every platfor...

Abortion

So, what’s more fun than talking about a VERY heart wrenching topic in a way that will alienate half the listening audience?  It’s a sad subject and is even sadder that the subject has to be talked about.  Take a listen this week as Jimmy and Josh honestly discuss the tragic topic of abortion.     -----   Roe v Wade 1 Timothy 3 Luke 6:32   ----- Dr. Jimmy Myers on Twitter: @docjimmymyers, Instagram: @jmyersfam, and Facebook: @docjimmymyers   Dr. Josh Myers on Twitter: @...

Movies for Parenting Sons

This week the guys talk through essential movies to watch with your sons. Whether you're a dad or mom, watch these movies with your sons. Through these movies you can help them learn healthy masculine traits.    -----   Grumpy Cat   Questions to ask while watching films:   What qualities were depicted in this film that teach us what kind of man God wants us to be?  How can we, like Christ, stand up against insurmountable odds? Why do some men choose to die for what they b...

The Pairadocs Open

This week the guys participate in their own golf tournament, benefiting themselves. No surprise, no one else showed up. But Jimmy and Josh had a blast playing and having a conversation about their lives as father and son. You won't want to miss.    -----       ----- Dr. Jimmy Myers on Twitter: @docjimmymyers, Instagram: @jmyersfam, and Facebook: @docjimmymyers   Dr. Josh Myers on Twitter: @docjoshmyers, Instagram: @docjoshmyers, and Facebook: @docjoshmyers   Pairadocs P...

Freeze and Flee

I remember once watching John Wayne in an old movie (As every red-blooded American male should do, at least once a month) as he was waiting on top of the wall at the cavalry outpost for an attack from the marauding Indians.  He said to a much less experienced soldier, “It’s quiet…too quiet.”  In other words, when it gets too quiet, it’s all about the hit the proverbial fan!  Freeze and Flee, the last of Sue Johnson’s Demon Dialogues, has to do when couples reach the point of giving up.  When...

Parental Questions

Tune in this week and Jimmy and Josh answer parent questions they received at a recent speaking engagement. The boys bat around several topics you’re sure to enjoy.     -----   The Highwaymen   Lorena   What is the best way to approach the topic of sex with your teenager? Early and often, don't wait until they are teenagers. This is a lifelong conversation   Raising an Original by Julie Lyles Carr Preparing for Adolescence by James Dobson   When is a cellphone a g...

Protest Polka

Would you like to dance?  Well, if you’re a good Baptist (and Josh most certainly is not!), the answer would an unequivocal “no.”  And that would be the correct answer for all of us when it comes to the Protest Polka.  This deadly relationship dance is one of the main indicators of marriages that don’t make it past the 5-year mark.  Listen in as the guys, two step their way through this issue and tango their way to a solution…ok, I’m completely done with dancing puns.    -----   My R...