Have you ever felt stuck, stagnant, and feel like there’s no way out? It takes conscious effort to ditch old patterns of the past and start looking into your future self. While it seems challenging, you can change and be a better version of yourself—for you and your family. 

In today’s episode, Dr. Benjamin Hardy talks about his new book, Personality Isn’t Permanent. He explains how having a mindset geared toward creating your best future is key to growth as an individual and parent. He also shares his insights about how living intentionally affects your behavior and decision-making as a parent. 

Tune in to the episode to learn how to create your best future!

Here are three reasons why you should listen to the full episode: Discover how to create and define your future self.Learn why parenthood should be driven by purpose and intention.Gain new insights on the importance of self-development and personal growth, even during parenthood.  ResourcesPersonality Isn’t Permanent by Benjamin Hardy The Psychology of Future Self, a TED Talk by Dan GilbertMan’s Search for Meaning by Viktor FranklThis episode is sponsored by Good Stories for Rebel Girls: The Podcast! Tune in with your kids and discover the lives of extraordinary women all over the world.FREE GIFT! Get your free Simplify Motherhood Cheat Sheet on MakeMotherhoodSimple.comEpisode HighlightsFuture Self vs. Past Self Who we are today is a reflection of our past self and past stories.We tend to downplay the changes we’ve experienced. However, it is healthy to acknowledge these changes and develop empathy toward our past self.Understanding your past and differentiating it from the possibilities of your future self could help you mature and move forward.Envision your future self and use it to drive your behavior today. How to Work Toward Your Future Self Constantly remind yourself of who your future self is. Daily prayer, meditation, or journaling may help. It takes conscious effort and intentional actions to create change and solidify your future identity. Instead of acting on autopilot, you must intentionally act in the direction of your future self. It might help to share your goals, especially if adjusting the boundaries in a relationship is part of your journey to create your best future.Having a Sense of Purpose The present loses meaning if you don’t have a sense of purpose, hope, or future.In a marriage, there should be a shared purpose and support in working toward the same direction.A couple must communicate each other’s goals and find a compromise to work as a team and achieve a shared purpose. Being Stuck in the Past We often get stuck in our former identity or narratives, and this can be either good or bad.Our past, no matter how positive or negative, does not have to define our future life and goals. It is easy to get stuck, especially if you found success in your past. However, remaining stuck can hinder you from improving and moving to a more meaningful purpose.Things that worked before may not work anymore for the future self you envision.Dr. Benjamin’s Future SelfHe shared that he wants his future self to be more religiously oriented and less entrepreneurial.Dr. Benjamin works toward his future self by developing attributes and skills he currently doesn’t have. He is also focusing on financial and spiritual growth. Parenthood and Living Toward Your Future Self Focusing on their future self can help parents become more forgiving.Getting a grasp of your future self can define your decisions.When you make decisions based on what your future self would prefer, you’re not making decisions based on momentary pleasure or pain.Advice for ParentsGive yourself space and take time to think about the person you want to be.Live intentionally.Find something to hope for and look forward to. Stick to your purpose to make the everyday mundane things more meaningful. Actively work toward future goals and plans. 5 Powerful Quotes from This Episode

“I think that that’s crucial, that you choose to frame and choose positive meanings for anything that happened in your past… You choose to view it from a positive sense and that it happened for you, and that you can use it to make better decisions in the future.”

“You want your future self to be the thing driving your behavior, not your former self.”

“If you want to act as your future self, then you can’t be doing it unconsciously. You actually have to be doing it intentionally, which means you’ve thoughtfully decided who you want to be and what you’re going to do that day.”

“It can be really easy to get stuck in a narrative where you were really successful in the past and stay there to the detriment of maybe moving towards a more meaningful purpose.”

“As you build confidence, your aspirations actually expand. So I would just invite people to take the time to really think about who they’d like to be.”

About Dr. Benjamin

Dr. Benjamin Hardy is an organizational psychologist and best selling author. His works include Willpower Doesn’t Work and Personality Isn’t Permanent. He is also a father of five kids. He is passionate about sharing his insights on how to define your own life and create a better future. 

You can know more about his work through his website. You may also reach him through his email for any questions.

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Thanks for listening!

To a beautiful and simplified motherhood, 

Chanelle


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