Episode 24 – Self-Love and Self-Acceptance

How do you speak to yourself on a day to day basis?  Are you kind to yourself?  Do you extend love to yourself? My guess is, you don’t.  Don’t worry – that’s normal.  We’ve all been shown and taught over the years that we aren’t …

How do you speak to yourself on a day to day basis?  Are you kind to yourself?  Do you extend love to yourself?

My guess is, you don’t.  Don’t worry – that’s normal.  We’ve all been shown and taught over the years that we aren’t good enough, strong enough, sexy enough, smart enough.  Whether through ads or magazine articles or the kids at school when we were little, we’ve all been conditioned to self-loathe.

Self-love starts with self-acceptance, and when we hate ourselves, or disown ourselves, and then we unwittingly create discord in our mind-body system.

Here are some steps you can take to become more mindful of your overly critical inner chatter and begin to cultivate self-love and self-acceptance:

1) Choose to become curious about your inner dialogue. Become aware of just how often you do this to yourself and stop in those moments and say to yourself “I know I am in a difficult moment” or “I’m feeling some anxiety in my mind and body” and accept that that feeling is present – notice where you feel this pressure in your body, then begin to ask yourself, “can I choose to see myself as a human here? Can I choose instead to be kind to myself in this moment?”

2) Imagine, in each situation where you’re noticing yourself going down the path of negative self talk – imagine instead that you were a sweet and innocent newborn baby. Would you diminish them for not knowing how to crawl yet? Would you call them stupid for not being able to read yet? Of course not. They are at the perfect level of understanding for where they are at in their experience and SO ARE YOU. Never forget this. You don’t come into this world already perfect and amazing at everything there is to know – it doesn’t work that way. We are constantly evolving and growing and if we make a mistake somewhere – we are most certainly growing and that is OK!

3) Try to think about this negative inner chatter as an OLD story – an old program of yours. Notice that this is a story as old as you are and try to find a way to challenge your interpretation in this present situation. If you acted in an unhealthy or irresponsible way, ask yourself if there were reasons in this situation that made you act in a way that was perhaps soothing in the moment to you? Is there a trauma that might be underneath this “mistake” that mirrors something you went through long ago?  Did you eat the whole container of ice cream because that was literally the only way you knew how to self soothe yourself when you were little and it once helped you to not feel so alone or afraid? And can you see the inner child within who just wants to find relief? Can you make a commitment now to view this through a kinder softer lens? Can you agree with the idea that you were doing the best you could in the moment? (I believe that is what we are all doing anyway, right?)

4) Can you notice how every single person on this planet makes mistakes on a daily, weekly, or even more frequent basis? Can you also notice how almost all of us have this habit of self-judgement and self-deprecation? In these moments it’s really easy to feel alone with our self-loathing, while boosting everyone we know up on a pedestal – seeing them as virtuous and infallible.  That’s another story.  We are all in this same self-critical boat.  Ahoy maytee!

5) Can you find the courage to forgive yourself? If you maybe did something that was morally questionable at some point in your life, can you see the situation from a new perspective? Can you see if you can make amends either energetically or in a journaling session or in person?

6) Use loving self talk to yourself – go on a self-love rampage and practice this as much as you possibly can.  Ease into self-love.  It’s a practice.

The Self-Love Rampage at the end was inspired by Abraham Hicks – you can find more of these rampages on Youtube, like THIS ONE.

The recording at the beginning of the episode was Ram Dass and can be found HERE!

As always, thanks so much for tuning in, guys!  If you have your own healing story you’d like to share on the show, please reach out!  [email protected] or [email protected]

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**DISCLAIMER:  I am not a doctor and this or any other podcast hosted by Katelyn Michals, L.Ac. is not intended to replace traditional medical care.  It is important that you are evaluated by a physician before embarking on this or any other self-help program**