Ep 70 Beauty and Style Editor Kim France

“You can always make a change”: founding editor of Lucky Magazine Kim France on why we shouldn’t beat ourselves up for caring about appearance as we age, using invisibility as a superpower, and memories of SP4 on Texas summer days.

The post Ep 70 Beauty and Style Editor Kim France appeared first on Midlife Mixtape .

“You can always make a change”: founding editor of Lucky Magazine Kim France on why we shouldn’t beat ourselves up for caring about appearance as we age, using invisibility as a superpower, and memories of SP4 on Texas summer days.

Girls of a Certain Age blog – sign up to subscribe
Everything is Fine Podcast
Headcount.org – sign up to register voters at concerts!
The Thank-You Project: Cultivating Happiness One Letter of Gratitude at a Time – Nancy’s new book!

Love Will Keep Us Together…from an era when music videos were, um…yeah you just have to watch it

Thanks as always to M. The Heir Apparent, who provides the music behind the podcast – check him out here!

 

***This is a rough transcription of Episode 70 of the Midlife Mixtape Podcast. It originally aired on February 18, 2020. Transcripts are created using a combination of speech recognition software and human transcribers, and there may be errors in this transcription, but we hope that it provides helpful insight into the conversation. If you have any questions or need clarification, please email [email protected] ***

Kim France 00:00

Too many magazines and venues aimed at women in midlife bang the drum about being in midlife way too much. I mean, sometimes it’s called for. But some days you just want to look at a bunch of cute skirts.

Nancy Davis Kho 00:13

Welcome to Midlife Mixtape, The Podcast. I’m Nancy Davis Kho and we’re here to talk about the years between being hip and breaking one.

[THEME MUSIC – “Be Free” by M. The Heir Apparent].

Nancy 00:38

Hey, everyone. This is Nancy. And I’m just here to thank everyone for their support of my new book, The Thank-You Project: Cultivating Happiness One Letter of Gratitude at a Time. The book came out from Running Press in December and over the past month on my book tour, I’ve had a chance to meet and hear from so many of you. And it’s more than made up for all those 5 am writing sessions that it took to get this baby out in the world.

The book is about a year I spent writing thank you letters to the formative people, places and past times in my life, and it’s both the how-to and why-to for readers that I hope gives you the incentive to start writing your own gratitude letters.

I’ve heard from so many people who have either started writing letters, or at least started making a list of whom they’d like to thank. Stories of wonderful sympathetic aunts and steady high school friends and really cheerful school crossing guards. And I have to say my heart is just filling up with the reminder of how many good people there are in the world. And I hope my book will be a starting point for you to remember that too. I think we all need that just about now. The Thank-You Project is available online and in bookstores. And there’s also an audio version that I hope you’ll check out. More information at www.daviskho.com  And if you’ve read The Thank-You Project already and you liked it, I hope you’ll help spread the word about gratitude. You can review it on Amazon or Barnes & Noble or Goodreads. You could share your recommendation on social media. And if you do that and tag me at @midlifemixtape, I’ll send you a signed book plate put in the front of your book.

[MUSIC]

Hey, everyone. So, I’ll just skip over the rules that I’m supposed to be on podcast hiatus because obviously that didn’t stick especially when I heard from today’s guest.

Here’s the deal. I recently bought a blush that I saw advertised on Facebook and honest to God, I thought it was going to do everything but balance my checkbook. It said I was going to have smoother skin. That it was a tone that was designed exactly for an aging woman, that it had just the right amount of gleam in it. I was so excited to get this stupid blush. And three days after I started using it, I called my sister and I’m like, “Dude, it’s just a blush. Why do I keep falling prey to this stuff?”

I feel like I’m more susceptible than ever to marketing around beauty and style products that help me “maintain my sense of self,” let’s say. That’s the generous way to put it. And I’m hoping that I’m not the only one who needs a steady hand at the rudder to take us through this conversation about beauty and style in the years between being hip and breaking one. But there was only one person I wanted to talk to about this and it took a little bit to get the scheduling together.

Today’s guest is writer, author, editor podcaster and blogger Kim France. Kim is the founding editor of the award-winning Lucky Magazine, which she ran for 11 years. Under Kim’s leadership, Lucky became the most successful magazine launch in Conde Nast history. She’s also a magazine industry veteran and has written extensively about rock music, pop culture and fashion for a wide variety of publications among them The New York Times Magazine, Rolling Stone, Spin and every Gen X women’s magazine crush, Sassy. These days, Kim writes the blog Girls of a Certain Age, which covers style fashion and beauty for women in their 40s and beyond. And she co-hosts a new podcast called Everything is Fine for women over 40. So, put on your Korean sheet mask and relax for the next half hour as we talk with Kim France.

[MUSIC]

Alright. I am here today with Kim France. And I’m so glad you’re here today, Kim. Thanks for coming on the show.

Kim 04:10

Well, thanks so much for having me.

Nancy 04:12

Well, you know, it’s taken me, let’s see, 70 episodes to get to a point where I felt like I wanted to talk about beauty and style at midlife because I sometimes think oh my god, we’re under so much pressure, we need that too? That’s just, it’s a bridge too far. But when I listened to your new podcast and of course, I knew all about your background at Lucky and Sassy and everything else you’re the perfect person to talk about this. I feel like we’re going to have a comfortable talk. You’re not going to make us all feel worse for not looking great 24/7.

Kim 04:44

Right now, I’m in the sweats I wore to walk my dogs this morning and the shirt I slept in.

Nancy: 04:50

Can I tell you; I record from a home office, but I went and put on under eye concealer and lipstick because I knew I’d be talking to you? So yeah, well listen. Before we get into that, we always have the first question on the Midlife Mixtape Podcast. What was your first concert and what were the circumstances?

Kim 05:11

My first concert is a little embarrassing. Um, it was Captain and Tennille.

Nancy 05:16

Embarrassing? “Muskrat Love”! Come on.

Kim 05:19

Ha-ha I know. It was sixth grade. I took my friend Karen Reiner and her parents, and I thought it was pretty glamorous I have to say. They were like I mean, “Love Will Keep Us Together” was as big a pop hit as there ever was. And I love that song.

Nancy 05:36

And were you sporting the perfect Toni Tennille bowl haircut that so many of us aspired to in that era?

Kim 05:41

I tried it – my inspiration was Dorothy Hamill, but it was not a success. I have pretty coarse curly hair and it didn’t want to do the Dorothy Hamill thing very successfully.

Nancy 05:53

Yeah, I feel like the Dorothy Hamill did a lot of girls wrong in the 70s. We all thought we could pull it off and really only Dorothy Hamill could pull it as she was doing a spin. That’s really where that haircut peaked.

Kim 06:05

Exactly.

Nancy 06:06

But you started out as a music writer, didn’t you? You started out working for Spin?

Kim 06:11

I did. I started out early on in the late 80s, early 90s. I was really into hip hop and there weren’t a lot of women writing about hip hop, so it was a really good time to get into that. Then I my interests got a little broader and I started liking indie rock and a lot of women in rock and I wrote about music for a lot of publications. It was a very fun time.

Nancy 06:33

And do you still go to concerts and you know, are you still living the Captain and Tennille concert life where you’re hitting the shows?

Kim 06:40

I did go see Yo La Tengo on Christmas Day.

Nancy 06:44

Oh, nice.

Kim 06:45

They play a series of Hanukkah shows at the Bowery Ballroom every year and they’re my favorite bands. So, I went to go see them. But I have to say by the end, I was like, I gotta go sit down.

Nancy 06:56

Yeah, I’m very picky about my concert shoes. At this point, I’ve completely given up fashion and I will wear a Dansko clog to a concert if that means I can stay up through the very end. So, judge me all you want, 20-year-olds, but my feet won’t hurt tomorrow.

Kim 07:10

If you still go see shows, that’s very impressive.

Nancy 07:13

I do, although with the book stuff going on, I’m kind of in withdrawal because I’ve been doing so much promotion on my book that I didn’t buy tickets. And I usually have tickets lined up months in advance. I haven’t bought any for a few months because I just don’t know what I’m going to be doing on any particular night and I have to prioritize the book stuff. But I just actually last night went on to www.headcount.org  which if you guys have listened to the show for a while you know that I interviewed the founder of this organization, which I just love because they do voter registration at concerts. So, you sign up as a volunteer and you just, you know, work at a table during the opening act and then you can stay and see the show for free.

Kim 07:53

Oh, wow.

Nancy 07:54

Yeah, so I always feel like it’s a double whammy. I’m saving money and I’m saving democracy. So, I just signed up to do a Kurt Vile show at the Castro Theatre in San Francisco in May. So, I love Headcount.org. I figure at least you know that I can rationalize, I can take a night off book promo tour to register some young voters. It’s like registering my grandchildren. They’re so young. I love it.

Alright. So, we’re going to talk about beauty at a certain age. Of course, you’ve got this wonderful newsletter called Girls of a Certain Age, which I’ve been subscribed to for quite a while now. And I just love it because every day I open and I think, oh, jangly necklaces. That’s what I’m going to think about for the next five minutes.

We’re going to talk more about it. But I have to say part of my reticence in even tackling this subject is this idea of, you know, this tension as we age where I think, I want to be perceived as smart and soulful and not vain. But I also want to feel good about how I look, just as much as I ever did. And I heard something on your recent podcast, you said smart people can be interested in shallow things. And I’m like, there it is. There’s my permission. I can worry about jangly necklaces and whatever else I want and still be smart. And I really appreciate that you kind of acknowledge that there’s maybe that little bit of tension. And I wondered, what is this all about as we age, like we want to look good, but we don’t want to be perceived necessarily as caring as much as we did in our 20s? Do you think that’s true?

Kim 09:21

Yes, I mean, that hasn’t been 100% my experience. I have watched myself just become a lot more vain. And I’m okay with that. It makes sense given what our culture is like that that would happen to me at this stage in life. But I do think that there are a lot of messages out there that once you hit a certain age, you no longer have any fucks to give.

Nancy 09:42

Right.

Kim 09:43

It does run counter to that a little bit. But I think it’s silly to think that…or it’s not silly, it’s not FAIR to yourself to think that caring about beauty and what you wear isn’t important. Of course, it’s important. This is the world we live in and I think beating yourself up over being interested in it is really pointless.

Nancy 10:03

I think that’s a really great point. I mean, I remember so clearly in my 20s thinking I can’t wait until I’m 50 and I can give up, you know. I don’t have to worry about this stuff anymore. I’m just gonna settle into wearing caftans and not caring.

Well, I’m 53 and I really care, you know, and I don’t think that I’m going to stop caring when I’m 63 or 73, you know, and we have to work even harder now, I guess, to see results. And yeah, I appreciate that you acknowledge that in your podcast there isn’t a magic age where you get to stop worrying about or wanting to feel good because I don’t think it’s necessarily that. I don’t think it comes from like, oh, I want everybody to notice me. I want to look in the mirror and think, good for you. You’re healthy. You’re holding it together.

Kim 10:50

Well, it’s all about not giving up.

And I think the idea of giving up at a certain point becomes very appealing, but only, like you were saying, when it is way in the future like you used to tell yourself when I’m 50 I can’t wait to give up. But giving up it doesn’t feel good. And your appearance is just part of your whole person. And so, giving up on a big part of your whole being is a big thing to do.

Nancy 11:15

Do you think that we are facing aging differently than previous generations? And I say this, of course a week after the Super Bowl where we all saw 50-year-old J Lo on the poll, there was such a kerfuffle about that performance. And I’m like, you know what? There are some things I don’t need to have opinions about and that’s one of them. If that’s what she felt good doing, good for her. I can’t get worked up about it in either direction. Good for her for being so energetic.

Kim 11:40

I feel a little bit the same way. I guess I also know what women like J Lo do to look that way and how early in the morning they hit the gym.

Nancy 11:48

Tell us, Kim. Tell us because then we’ll know too.

Kim 11:52

Yeah, they work out for hours. And then they go back to the gym again on the same day and work out for hours more and then they don’t ever get to enjoy a meal. They’re constantly starving themselves. And I too watched J Lo working the poll and everybody was remarking on her age as we were watching the Halftime Show and how remarkable it was. And I just saw it. Yeah, any woman could do that. If any woman wanted to put in the kind of work that those women put in. I’ve seen it with actresses and models. And it’s not a lifestyle you necessarily want.

Nancy 12:23

Right. But do you think that Gen X and I guess you know, older millennials, younger boomers, do you think that we’re under different kinds of pressures in terms of our appearance than our mothers and our grandmothers? And if so, why is that?

Kim 12:36

Oh, I think there’s so much more pressure to look young forever now. Absolutely. I mean, I think about what my mother looked like at 55. And what I look like at 55. And they’re two very different things. My mother looks pretty good. She’s 82 now. I never had kids. So, I think that’s a reason why I look different than she did. But I do think it’s also about the effort.

Nancy 12:56

Right. I mean, obviously, social media is a huge part of it because we’re all cultivating an image – except the most enlightened of us who have stayed off social media, and I admire that and wish I were you. But for those of us who do engage with it, there’s so much pressure to have that, you know, cultivated persona, and you don’t want to put up the picture where you’re picking your nose or whatever, you know, you’re trying to present the best version of yourself. And that’s not just limited to women. That’s guys too. And I think that’s one of the big changes too that I see men under so much more pressure to have six pack and do the CrossFit and all this stuff. And I think I think dudes probably are feeling that even more than we are, because it was a more gradual transition for us. But social media has really brought it to the forefront, even for the guys in our generation.

Kim 13:44

I suppose. So, I guess that’s probably really true. I don’t pay as much attention to them.

Nancy 13:50

Well, you know, I’ve got listeners of all types. And I want to make sure that they to realize that we see that yeah, you guys are under pressure too.

I wonder if you think brands are noticing the way that we’re aging differently and what they may be doing differently in terms of their marketing, in terms of their product development.

Kim 14:08

Well, I think brands are slowly beginning to pay attention to this demographic.

Nancy 14:15

Let me just clarify the demographic. Are they actually acknowledging that there is a Generation X? Because so many people forget to do that? So, I don’t know if they even recognize that we exist.

Kim 14:25

I think they think over 40 women, or over 50 women menopausal women. I don’t think they necessarily think in terms of Gen X. I think we are doomed to remain a pretty forgotten generation just because there aren’t as many of us in our spending power in this age.

Nancy 14:39

I hate that.

Kim 14:42

It’s women in their 40s and 50s who have the most money and control the household income and I hope that that is something that people are beginning to pay attention to.

You see it you know on Madewell’s website and Anthropologie’s website. You’ll see gray haired models every once in a while. Now, my pet peeve is that they always look like the same gray-haired model with curly grey hair and petite and perfect. But they’re doing it. They’re slowly making the change. However, our culture is so damn youth obsessed that it’s going to be a while before there is significant change.

Nancy 15:16

I always think it’s funny the way so many products are marketed as anti-aging. And every time I see that I think well, okay, the opposite of aging is death. So, it’s not youth. It is death. So, you know, it makes me crazy. But then I see a picture of myself on book tour and I look at my neck and I’m like, where is that anti-aging product because I need it for my neck right now? So, I feel like maybe that is changing a little bit. Was it Dove or L’Oreal where they’re trying to take the anti-aging language out of some of the marketing at least?

Kim 15:48

Yeah, I’ve read that too and I can’t tell you who it is. I know that people are working on that. And you know, change does come but they’ll just come up with a new phrase that says the same thing. So, what’s funny to me is that millennials are already worried about their skin. I didn’t worry about my skin for years. I didn’t pay attention to my skin.

Nancy 16:08

Because we were so busy … the whole idea of wearing sunscreen, hello? In the 70s, the only sunscreen I used was Ban De Soleil to get the San Tropez tan. We had a back porch with white aluminum siding, which really concentrated the sun’s rays in upstate New York. And then I had my Go-Go’s album, the gatefold covered with tin foil. So, you could hold that under your chin and get the real maximum skin damage. And I definitely did that to myself. I see it now. But it cracks me up. My daughters are 21 and 18. Oh, wait no 19. Sorry, Lu. They’re so good about wearing sunscreen all the time. And I’m like you girls, your skin’s gonna be so much better than mine.

Kim 16:52

I know but they missed out on the fun. I grew up in Texas, we spent so many hours out by the pool, sunbathing. It was kind of fun. I probably shouldn’t have done it. I know that you know, wearing SP4 was a really bad of an idea.

Nancy 17:08

SP4, why even bother?

So, your new podcast is called Everything is Fine. And I wanted to ask you to pronounce it because I feel like the intonation of that phrase really is going to drive the message. I want to hear how you say it.

Kim 17:22

Well, the way Tally says it, the woman I do the podcast with my partner she goes, Everything is Fine. But what I like about the title is that there’s a lot of ambiguity. And you know, some days, it just sucks to be a woman in her 40s or 50s, or whatever. And you’re dealing with changes in your body. And you’re dealing with being seen differently at work. And it’s sucks. So, on those days, it’s more of an Everything is Fine. But on other days, everything really is fine. And I think that’s what I’m hoping is the message of the podcast is like we will get through all of this.

Nancy 17:58

So, one of the episodes that I listened to recently, you guys were talking about feeling invisible and how to fight that feeling and what that’s all about. And one of the things I was thinking about and tell me what how this lands for you… But the invisible part, sometimes I use it to my advantage. Like, there are times where I think, I gotta run up to the store. But I know I can do it. Even if I see people I know, they probably won’t recognize me if I dress a certain way and kind of hold myself a certain way. And it’s very nice to have the superpower where I can do what I want. And nobody’s gonna notice me.

And then other times I hate it, you know. I want to, you know, feel like I’m dressed up and that you’re getting people to notice me in the spaces that I’m moving through. And I wondered if you felt like you also had kind of an on/off switch for invisibility?

Kim 18:46

Sure. I mean, it’s off today, that’s for sure. I’m in my sweats, you know, for hours. But and you know, I’ve heard women talk again and again about how invisibility can be a superpower. And I think that’s great. The whole idea that you can make an effort on certain days and allow yourself to fly under the radar on other days is great, why not? You know, as I said, I grew up in Texas, I wear makeup every day, like I will eventually put it on today. It sort of is my reset button to do all that grooming stuff every day.

But I’ve gotten more comfortable you know. We talked a lot on that episode about how if as long as you know there are people in your life for whom you are not invisible, then you’re not invisible. And that was a very important distinction for me. And we all have those people

Nancy 19:33

Right. So, it’s a question of maybe making choices or prioritizing. Like, you don’t care so much about the general public but really just to the subset of people to whom you matter.

Kim 19:43

Right, which is part of what happens when you age anyway. You stop giving as much shit as much about what every random person on the street things. And it’s kind of sad if you don’t, you know, and it’s much better to proceed that way.

Nancy 19:57

We all know those people, too, who are still trying to appeal to everybody at this age and it’s the Amy Poehler, “I’m the ‘cool’ mom!” character right?

Kim 20:07

Exactly, Mean Girls. Never be the cool mom.

Nancy 20:11

Yeah, don’t ever. That should be nobody’s goal. So if there’s somebody who’s listening who’s struggling right now with that idea of feeling invisible or you know, feeling unseen, do you have any tips about what they could do right now, today, to look or feel better, I mean, just to give themselves that kind of confidence boost?

Kim 20:31

I’m a big fan of beauty products. I really am. And I think that if you look in the mirror and you think you’re invisible and you don’t wear much makeup or take much care of your skin, that’s an easy thing to do to feel less invisible. I think the other thing, like I said, is just to acknowledge that there are people in your life for whom you are far from invisible. And that’s an important thing. And I think walking through life as though you’re not invisible. If it really gets to you, just deciding that you’re not can be a powerful thing.

Nancy 21:04

I was at a conference once where Katie Couric was the keynote speaker and they asked her about, you know, feeling invisible over 50. And she basically said, “Fuck that.” She said, you know, “I’m never going to be invisible.” And it was just from her sense of confidence and her sense of like, I’ve got value, I get to hold space and if you have a problem with it, that’s your problem. Not mine. And I think that’s a good thing to remind yourself. You get to hold space in the world. And don’t shrink into it. Unless you need to run out and get some milk and not talk to somebody at the grocery store, shrink right up if you need it.

Kim 21:40

Yeah, I mean, Katie Couric is a celebrity. So, she truly never will be invisible.

Nancy 21:44

No.

Kim 21:45

So, it’s easy for her to say, but I agree with the sentiment.

Nancy 21:48

I wanted to talk with you about your evolution through media channels because you started off, as we said, the beginning of the episode, you started off as a writer for Spin, you were a writer for Sassy, then you were the founding editor of Lucky Magazine and now you’ve segued into the Girls of a Certain Age Newsletter, and now you’re podcasting. So, you’re literally traveling the gamut of media channels to reach your audience.

And I mean, you’ve really had to stay on your toes in terms of the channels, the technology, and I’m wondering what that’s taught you? What have you had to figure out as you go? Because a lot of people in this phase of life don’t love the idea of change. A lot of us want to keep doing things the way we always have. And that’s not a choice in media. So, what have you learned?

Kim 22:36

Well, I mean, I think I’ve adapted as much as I’m capable of. I was just joking on the phone with my podcast partner Tally about the fact that still it’s like really 1996 in my apartment in many ways.

Nancy 22:49

In what way?

Kim 22:50

I’m an analog person in a lot of ways. But I did realize that I did have an audience after doing Lucky. And especially after doing Sassy, there were people who are going to continue to be hopefully interested in what I had to say and that I had to choose the right venue to reach them. And that’s how the blog you know, the newsletter got started. Because I felt like that was an easy way to reach them.

Nancy 23:14

And can you talk about the Girls of a Certain Age Blog and how people can find it and what you do there? Because I love it.

Kim 23:20

Okay, thank you. You can find it a www.girlsofacertainage.com.

Nancy 23:24

And I’ll leave links to this, of course, in the show notes to make it easy for listeners.

Kim 23:28

Thank you. And it was really started just because I wanted a venue. I kept having ideas about things I wanted to write. It’s evolved since into a little bit more of shopping all the time. But it’s shopping from the perspective of a 55-year-old woman who still cares a bit about looking cool. And I don’t go on a lot about age. I feel like that’s a bummer. I feel like too many magazines and venues aimed at women in midlife bang the drum about being in midlife way too much. I mean, sometimes it’s called for. But some days, you just want to look at a bunch of cute skirts.

Nancy 24:06

Well, and it’s not just a bunch of cute skirts, it’s skirts that would look great on a woman in her 40s and 50s. Because there’s some stuff that, I don’t know… I mean, I’m not telling anybody what they have to do. You wear whatever you want to wear, but I appreciate that you’ve curated clothes that I feel like I would look stylish in and feel comfortable and not somebody wouldn’t say to me, did you borrow that from your 22-year-old because that doesn’t work for me.

Kim 24:29

Well, thank you. That’s very much what I’m trying to do. I have a feature I do regularly called dresses with grown up hemlines. And I think it is because I’m just sort of saying like, yeah, we’re grownups now. We’re not wearing things way past our knees unless we’re on Real Housewives. But we don’t have to go on about it. That’s just what I’m showing you. Like it’s all been filtered through the 55-year-old filter.

Nancy 24:52

The 55-year-old Kim France filter is a great filter, I swear. And you know what I also like? It’s short. I look at it, I’m like, I’ve absorbed that, and I can move on. But it’s a good you know, every day I kind of look at beautiful things and think “I too need white wide legged jeans”. And now I’m going back to work. But every once a while I actually buy – I have a really good eye cream I bought on a recommendation from the newsletter that I love.

Kim 25:17

Oh good. I’m glad. I love to hear that.

Nancy 25:18

Ole Henrickson. I feel like it’s a Banana eye cream.

Kim 25:23

Banana eye cream with the banana powder, good for your under-eye circles.

Nancy 25:27

I feel like it is doing something. I feel like it’s giving me something to do in the morning.

And of course, now, you’ve started the podcast. So, this is the Everything is Fine Podcast and you and your co-host Tally are talking about how things are going at midlife. And where can people find that and talk a little bit about how you guys decided to do that?

Kim 25:49

You can find it on Apple podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, wherever you find your podcasts we’re there. And it was started because Tally got in touch with me. I’ve done a little bit of writing for The Cut about being in midlife. I wrote about vanity and middle age and also about dressing your age. And Tally, I think, saw those pieces. She saw Girls of a Certain Age and she wrote me a cold email saying, “I’m 46 years old. And suddenly all those things in my life that I heard what happened are happening. You know, I feel invisible. I’ve been interviewed for jobs by people half my age and I want to do a podcast about it. And do you want to do one with me?” And because my readers had been really keen on me doing a podcast anyway, and because I thought it was a fun idea, I said, “Sure.” So, we recorded our first few episodes a while ago and the show just launched in January. We have a few episodes up.

Nancy 26:49

I will link to that in the show notes as well.

Kim 26:50

Great. And it’s been really fun. I mean, for one thing, you know, I’m a writer, I do the blog. I’m working on a book and I’m alone all the time. And it’s so fun to have a collaborator. It’s been so long since I had somebody I was working on a project with and that’s great and I think an important thing in midlife, you know, because it can get very isolating.

Nancy 27:11

Yeah, I think community, having that group of friends. I mean, I the episode before this was with Ada Calhoun, of the Why We Can’t Sleep book. And that was one of the things that she found in her research really helps us get through the bumpy patches is just having people that you can reach out to, so I totally get that. So, you’re writing a book. What’s that all about?

Kim 27:33

I’m writing a book. The title is This Is Not My Beautiful House.

Nancy 27:38

Okay, pre ordered. I just pre ordered it based on the name.

Kim 27:43

It is a memoir about my time at Lucky, about my time at Sassy. A lot about sort of this last golden age of magazines before everything went away. During the time when I was employed at Lucky and the magazine was doing phenomenally well and I was at the peak of my career, my personal life was just in shambles. I was suffering from a terrible depression. I got cancer. I got a divorce. And so, it’s about that to you know, the sort of Lifetime movie aspect of my life during those years at Lucky.

Nancy 28:19

Do you have an idea when it’s going to come out? When will we be able to read it?

Kim 28:22

I don’t know when it’s going to come out because I have to finish it first.

Nancy 28:27

Oh, yeah. Details.

Kim 28:29

Yeah, we’re very overdue. But um, you know, I would hope that by 2021 or 22, it’s out in the world.

Nancy 28:36

Awesome. Well, let me know because I’m always happy to spread the word on topics like that. And sounds like a great read. I know Cranes New York Business Magazine named you in its 40 under 40 issue and I wonder, why are there more 50 over 50 lists? Why can’t we make those a thing?

Kim 28:54

Well, I think part of the reason is that that’s traditionally when people have the real power positions. But I think that’s changing. I mean, I have been on a couple of under 50 lists I will say. I think I was on an Instagrammers under 50.

Nancy 29:09

I’ve missed that boat. Is there any list of people under 54 because I have two more months to get on that? Hit me up. A young person tweeted and said I want to hear about you know, these 30 under 30 lists. Well and good. But I want to hear about the person who published their first book over 50 or did their first marathon.

Kim 29:32

I saw that.

Nancy 29:33

It was really cool. It was a really lovely… I mean, you know, some of the stuff that people talked about… because a lot of us are so busy doing whatever we need to do, but there is kind of this freedom  that comes when you get to a certain age and maybe it’s 50, maybe it’s 40. It’s different for everyone, obviously, but there does come a time where you can start pursuing your passion stuff a little bit more and, you know, that’s the good stuff. That’s what you’ve been working for all along.

Kim 30:03

I agree. And I think that a thing that happens in your 40s is you start thinking you can’t make change and you can make radical change when you’re that age. I mean, my whole life changed very involuntarily in my 40s. And I was able to turn it around. It’s a different existence. You know, it’s not as lucrative in existence, but it’s a far more satisfying existence.

Nancy 30:25

Geez, I think I should just stop the podcast right there. Yes. Yeah. I mean it’s so true. And I love when people come on the show and talk about having made significant changes at midlife. You know, everybody’s curious about the stories of reinvention and pivoting and I think in some cases, it’s a big pivot. In some case, it’s a little bit or incremental. But you know, just reminding yourself that you’re never stuck. No matter what age you are, you are not stuck. You can try different things.

Kim 30:54

You can always make a change. I mean, circumstances sometimes make it more difficult than others. But change can always be made and don’t go thinking that it can’t.

Nancy 31:04

Right. And don’t make yourself be the limiting factor. Don’t bet against yourself. Alright. I have one final question for you. And then I have a bonus question because it’s Kim France. So, first of all, what one piece of advice do you have for people younger than you? Or do you wish you could go back and tell yourself?

Kim 31:02

Oh, those would be two different things, I think.

Nancy 31:23

Okay. And I have three questions for you.

Kim 31:26

The advice I would give myself is to be a lot kinder to myself and like myself more. Not be so hard on myself. And then the advice I would give younger people is just to shut the fuck up. One of my closest friends is 31 years old and she’s fabulous. And she’s smart. And she has a sense of history, which I think a lot of younger people don’t. But yeah. Just stop.

Nancy 31:53

Yeah, I follow someone who recently got married. She’s in her 30s and the advice she has for sustaining marriage having been married for four months… I love reading it, after 27 years. I’m like, oh, this is good. I’m learning so much.

Kim 32:10

That’s funny.

Nancy 32:11

Alright. Here’s my bonus question. What’s your Desert Island Beauty product? What’s the one thing you could not live without?

Kim 32:20

Oh, God. One. That makes it really hard. I mean, if it’s a Desert Island, it’s got to be sunscreen.

Nancy 32:27

Sunscreen. Come on. Don’t take it so literally. It’s a Desert Island with shade. It can be anything.

Kim 32:33

Okay, if it’s a Desert Island with shade, I’m alone presumably so I don’t need to wear makeup except it would probably make me feel better. I’m just thinking this through. I would say the most important thing because I’ve been told recently this is the most important thing you can put on your skin is vitamin C.

Nancy 32:50

Really?

Kim 32:52

Yes.

Nancy 32:53

Well, I’m not doing that. In what form?

Kim 32:55

Serum, powder. A beauty expert recently told me that’s the thing.

Nancy 33:01

Alright. I gotta go submerge my face in a bowl of orange juice because I don’t have any serum or powder in my house. But all right, Kim France, thank you so much for coming on the show. It was delightful talking with you.

Kim 33:12

A pleasure. Thank you.

Nancy 33:14

Alright. Take care.

[MUSIC]

Nancy 33:19

Well, that’s it, people. Vitamin C. Now you know. Bell Biv DeVoe.

Let me know what you thought of this episode. You can email me at  [email protected]. You can tell me on the Midlife Mixtape Facebook page or find me on Instagram and Twitter @midlifemixtape.

And hey, if you haven’t left a review of this podcast wherever you’re listening, please consider doing that, I would really appreciate it. It makes the podcast so much easier for people to find. And hit that subscribe button too because yeah, there probably will be a March episode. And then in April, I’m going to try to get back to that every other week rhythm and I wouldn’t want you guys to miss out on any of my wonderful guests.

So, here’s the tea. I’m heading off the grid in a couple of days. “Here’s the tea.” I sound like I’m trying to be a 20-something because that’s not something that someone over 50 should probably say. But anyway, here’s the tea. I’m heading off the grid and a couple days, this is the much-postponed empty nest trip with my husband. We were supposed to go last fall but we had to keep pushing it off. I will tell you all about it when I get back but suffice it to say it if you are an REI member, you’re going to get quite a dividend this year because the number of times I’ve had to stop back in there for something made of Gore-Tex is pretty mind boggling.

Until next time, keep it together and please know that I really do appreciate every one of you who takes the time to listen to the Midlife Mixtape Podcast. Hope you have a great week.

[THEME MUSIC – “Be Free” by M. The Heir Apparent]

Transcribed by https://otter.ai

The post Ep 70 Beauty and Style Editor Kim France appeared first on Midlife Mixtape .