Marriaging: The Marriage Podcast with Jessica Fairfax
38 episodes - English - Latest episode: about 4 years ago - ★★★★★ - 31 ratingsMarriaging is created by Jessica Fairfax, a Marriage and Family Therapist on a mission to inspire authentic relationships. Every episode is designed to help provide you with realistic and helpful skills for improving communication, intimacy, and connection in your marriage. We’ll work through some of the most common and most challenging issues relationships face. You’ll also get to hear interviews with other therapists, who will share their strategies for helping young couples enhance their marriages. Listen each week to learn new practical steps you can take to building a better marriage.
Begin your journey to an authentic relationship today at marriagingpodcast.com
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Episodes
Finding Adventure and Connection in the Ordinary, with Jason Frishman, PsyD.
May 04, 2020 07:00 - 46 minutes - 53.8 MBJason Frishman, PsyD, shares his insights into creating adventure and meaningful connection in the everyday activities of life. We’re often taught the adventure story of the hero’s journey. We think we have to do grand, extraordinary things. It’s important for us to have a new perspective and create adventure in the smaller, daily activities needed to sustain a family. What do men experience in seeking adventure in real life vs. the hero’s journey? The hero’s journey can be harmful to...
Desire Differences with Jessica Cline, MSW, LCSW
April 27, 2020 07:00 - 49 minutes - 56.9 MBJessica Cline, a Clinical Sexologist and Licensed Clinical Social Worker, discusses sexual desire differences in relationships. Many couples experiences desire differences and need help navigating their sexual life. What couples experience with sexual desire differences People often set the standards for their relationship in the limerence phase. That isn’t sustainable. Sexual desire can change over time. You may get into the pattern of initiator and gatekeeper. Sex education prog...
Love Languages with Bridget Boursiquot, MSW, LICSW
April 20, 2020 07:00 - 53 minutes - 61 MBBridget discusses love languages and how we can all have relational care through understanding the basic work needed to create a healthy foundation. We often speak to our partner in the love language we want to receive instead of understanding how they receive love. 5 Love Languages (Developed by Gary Chapman) Words of Affirmation It’s about the “why”. Speaking to your partner’s strengths, their experience, their needs, is even more affirming than just a simple “thank you” or a compl...
Worry, COVID-19, and Your Relationship
April 13, 2020 07:00 - 8 minutes - 9.39 MBWorry is exhausting and stressful. So many of us are experiencing worry right now. It can overwhelm your mind, your body, and your relationship. We’ve all been battling COVID-19, and there’s a lot to be worried about. I’ll be transparent with you: I’m not an expert on global pandemics and I don’t have the medical knowledge to share facts about this virus. But I do know about connection. I know that we all need connection and support. Friendship is important. Your larger support system is...
Dating after Divorce with Kelly Lynch, EMT, LCSW, CPT, PN-1, Life Coach
April 06, 2020 07:00 - 49 minutes - 57 MBIn this episode, Kelly Lynch, owner and coach at The Unapology Project, talks about dating after divorce and the keys to building trust in yourself. We don’t talk about dating after divorce enough to help people prepare for it. The culture of dating has changed, and dating after a significant relationship has ended brings more challenges and more opportunities for growth. How do you filter out what’s unhealthy vs. what’s healthy with dating after divorce? Figure out what your relati...
Bringing Your Baby Home
March 30, 2020 07:00 - 17 minutes - 19.8 MBHaving a newborn can be exciting and sweet, and also stressful and challenging. You and your partner will experience many changes. It’s important to be able to accept those changes, and work to keep your relationship strong and close. Changes you and your partner may experience when you bring your baby home: You may both experience sleep deprivation. You’ll be tired. If the baby wakes up, you’ll probably wake up too. You’ll have to navigate new roles and parenting duties. You or your pa...
Pregnancy and Your Relationship
March 23, 2020 07:00 - 37 minutes - 43.5 MBIn this episode, I talked with two women, Hannah and Andrea, about their pregnancies and their relationships- finding a balance, letting go of control, and everything else they’re learning along the way. What was it like for you and your relationship when you began to discuss trying to get pregnant? Hannah discusses the challenge of balancing the head and heart. Lining up when it felt right to start trying to conceive, along with when it made sense. Andrea discusses her plan and how...
Trying to Conceive
March 16, 2020 07:00 - 10 minutes - 12.7 MBIf you and your partner are trying to conceive, it it’s important to keep your relationship strong and focus on supporting each other. The process of trying to conceive can be filled with stress and unexpected changes, so instead of getting stuck in worry, focus on what you can control. Everyone’s experience with pregnancy and having children is different. However, there are some common issues that relationships may experience in the process of trying to conceive. Problems in your relati...
Infertility and Your Relationship
March 09, 2020 07:00 - 12 minutes - 13.9 MBYou and your partner may be going through a challenging season of fertility issues right now. You feel alone, scared, isolated, and anxious. You shouldn’t go through infertility and trying to conceive alone. Miscarriages, infertility, and other fertility issues bring hurt, grief, sadness, and loss. It can be painful, overwhelming, and shocking when you learn you may have difficulty getting pregnant, or that you might not be able to at all. It’s important to know how infertility affec...
Addiction and Relationships with Ross Hill, MMFT, LMFT, CAC-P
March 02, 2020 08:00 - 53 minutes - 61.4 MBAddiction impacts your relationship with your partner. Whether alcohol, drug, or another addiction, it doesn’t live in isolation. Your relationship is affected. In this episode, Ross Hill, MMFT, LMFT, CAC-P, shares his knowledge of addiction from years of working with substance use issues. He gives helpful advice and encouragement for both partners, whether you’re not using and trying to establish boundaries and support for your partner, or whether you’re the one struggling with addiction an...
How You and Your Partner Can Cope with Big Life Changes
February 24, 2020 08:00 - 10 minutes - 12 MBNo matter what, you’ll face changes in life. The changes we face often impact our relationships more than we’re prepared for. You and your partner can grow closer together through big changes, but it will take some work. You and your partner may face many kinds of big changes over the years. New jobs, new houses, big moves, new children, grief and loss, major accomplishments. Whatever it might be, these big life changes can affect your relationship, and it’s important for you and your ...
Validation and Your Relationship
February 17, 2020 08:00 - 14 minutes - 16.8 MBYou and your partner want to change the way you communicate with each other. You want to be truly understood and cared for, with your feelings recognized and seen as valid. You’ve probably heard about validation before and you know it’s important. Maybe you’ve experienced the peace and comfort that comes with being validated. When your partner makes you feel emotionally valid, your relationship grows. You feel closer to them. You feel understood by them. Oftentimes, the thing a couple la...
Attachment and the Physiology of Connection, with Dr. Rebecca Jorgensen
February 10, 2020 08:00 - 48 minutes - 55.4 MBDr. Rebecca Jorgensen, an educator and leader in the field of couples therapy, discusses the physiology of connection and secure attachment in relationships. Attachment is about a bond, authenticity, and a secure connection with your partner. What to know about the physiology of connection: Our bodies are involved in the bonding process. Emotion is a sensation- a physiological response with meaning and motivation. When we develop security, we are able to hold a felt sense of our par...
Boredom in Your Relationship
February 03, 2020 08:00 - 18 minutes - 21.3 MBDo you ever feel bored with your relationship? Sometimes you wish it could be new and exciting again. Or you might have moments when you question if it’s still a good relationship at all. Getting bored in your relationship? We live in a society of instant gratification. When everything you want is at your fingertips, it’s easy to keep wanting more. When something feels old, we get bored. When you start to lose the excitement of your relationship, you quickly feel bored and start lookin...
Signs You Need Marriage Counseling
January 27, 2020 08:00 - 23 minutes - 27.6 MBWondering if you need couples therapy? I think it’s helpful for everyone, but there are definitely some clear signs that might give you some guidance. Here are 10 of the big issues that can help couples be aware of if their relationship could use counseling. When the majority of your conversations are negative. John Gottman, a researcher and leader in the field of couples therapy has found that in order for couples to maintain a positive relationship, a ratio of 5 positive feelings and ...
The Art of A.R.E. with Dr. Debi Gilmore
January 20, 2020 08:00 - 41 minutes - 47.2 MBYou’ll learn the most important steps for creating a secure relationship with your partner in this episode. Dr. Debi Gilmore, a Certified Emotionally Focused Therapist and Supervisor, shares about her work with couples. She gives us 3 specific core values to bring connection and secure attachment to a relationship. The main points of A.R.E. and Attachment: Attachment is the foundation of a relationship. Couples need this secure bond to create a lasting relationship. A.R.E gives us ...
Negative Cycles and Your Relationship
January 13, 2020 08:00 - 13 minutes - 15.6 MBIs there a pattern in your relationship? Do you and your partner have the same kind of fights over and over again? In this episode, we’re going to figure out how the two of you get stuck in a negative cycle, and create ways of helping you reconnect. Why do couples fight over little things? Little things like tasks around the house, who is picking up the groceries, or other seemingly unimportant things sometimes lead to the biggest fights. It builds up into one or both of you feeling ...
How to Have a Happy Marriage
January 06, 2020 08:00 - 10 minutes - 11.6 MBYou want to find happiness with your spouse. So, lower your expectations. Shocking, right? We’ll get into what that actually means. You have high hopes for your relationship. You might think about past joyful times in your relationship, or compare it to other relationships you see. But little frustrations build up every day, and it begins to build into resentment in your relationship. You’re getting stuck in negativity and disappointment instead of finding happiness with your spouse....
Interabled Relationships with Jose Luis Tapia-Fuselier Jr., M.S., CRC, LPC, NCC
December 30, 2019 08:00 - 38 minutes - 43.8 MBJose discusses what couples experience in interabled relationships, and what each partner can do to work together and form a stronger bond through new changes after a disability is acquired. Jose began working with couples through his work in rehabilitation counseling and helping individuals with brain injuries. He helps couples strengthen their relationship when one partner acquires a disability. What are some of the challenges couples face when one partner acquires a disability? You...
Setting Goals with Your Spouse
December 23, 2019 08:00 - 12 minutes - 14.6 MBSetting goals in your marriage is necessary, and difficult. If you and your spouse both have your own individual goals, or if you like to dream but have trouble putting in the action, you might feel like actually meeting your goals is impossible. In this episode, we’re discussing the importance of creating shared goals and supporting each other’s goals, and identifying how you can break your long-term goals down into small, achievable steps. It’s important to do goal-setting with your spou...
Eye Contact and Love in Your Relationship
December 16, 2019 08:00 - 9 minutes - 11.1 MBIn 1997, Arthur Aron developed a theory that 4 minutes of eye contact makes people closer and increases intimacy. In this episode, you’ll be encouraged to take steps to connect with your spouse and truly look them in the eyes without being distracted by all the noise around you. What you need to know about eye contact and your relationship: You’re missing out on more intimate love without eye contact with your partner. Think of times that you and your partner are in the same room a...
ADHD and Your Relationship, with Ari Tuckman, PsyD, CST
December 09, 2019 08:00 - 33 minutes - 38.8 MBAri Tuckman, PsyD, CST discusses how ADHD affects relationships. He shares how couples can recognize issues related to ADHD in their relationship, what they can do to improve understanding and improve their relationship, and specifically how couples can improve their sex life when one partner has ADHD. How Does ADHD affect relationships? We want our partners to be predictable. ADHD makes it difficult for the partner to be predictable. It also becomes more difficult for the other partn...
Holiday Traditions and Your Relationship
December 02, 2019 08:00 - 17 minutes - 20 MBYou had questions about holiday traditions and your relationship, and I’m here with answers! How do you create traditions when your significant other’s family is dealing with a loss? (1:10) Remember that grief can be complex and challenging. Your significant other may need to keep some of their family traditions to honor their loved one and to process their grief. Remember that grief also may not go away. It changes and becomes more manageable, but they might always have some hurt. As t...
The Importance of Taking a Time Out
November 25, 2019 08:00 - 13 minutes - 15.3 MBConflict with your partner can get heated at times, and you end up saying hurtful things. When harsh words or angry tones come up, it only leads to more distance between the two of you. Taking a time-out in conflicts like these can be helpful, but it’s important to know how to take the time-out, and how to come back together. How to take an effective time-out: Prior to any conflict, talk with your partner about time-outs and why you think this could help with conflict in your relationshi...
Receptivity: The One Thing that will Transform Your Relationship, with Shane Birkel, LMFT
November 18, 2019 08:00 - 39 minutes - 45.9 MBOverview of this Episode: Shane Birkel, a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and Certified Relational Life Therapist talks about receptivity and what it means in a relationship. Couples often have a hard time being receptive and vulnerable in communication with each other. Shane helps us learn how these challenges with receptivity developed, along with how to embrace compassion and healthy boundaries to create a healthy relationship with your partner. What problems with receptivity d...
How to Keep Work Travel from Ruining Your Relationship
November 11, 2019 08:00 - 10 minutes - 12.4 MBOverview: How Travel Affects Your Relationship Traveling for work can put a strain on your relationship and damage your connection with your spouse. You might be more stressed and worried or feel insecure about the relationship. Or you and your partner might go days or weeks without talking much, because you both understand your busy schedules, yet when you’re back together you feel disconnected. If you’re the one staying home, you might feel lonely and stressed with keeping the hous...
The Sprinkles Story with Laura Long, LMFT/S
November 04, 2019 08:00 - 28 minutes - 32.5 MBIn this episode, Laura shares The Sprinkles Story, a story about a conflict in her marriage and how she worked through it with some reflection, vulnerability, and connection with her partner. Laura’s Sprinkles Story: Laura and her husband met in college and began dating. After about a year of dating, Laura was on track to go to graduate school in a different state. While she didn’t do long distance, her husband (then boyfriend) wasn’t comfortable moving without a promise or commitmen...
How to Get Your Spouse to Listen to You
October 28, 2019 07:00 - 10 minutes - 11.7 MBOverview of this Episode You feel unheard. You want your spouse to tune in and listen to what you’re feeling and what you need. It can be so challenging to get them on the same page. It leaves you feeling more frustrated, and possibly stuck in conflict or further disconnected. In this episode, we’re talking about how you can approach your spouse in a way that invites them to listen, and how to share with them in ways that encourage engagement and connection. Main points of this episo...
Know Yourself Before the Relationship, with Taylor Looney, LMFT-A
October 21, 2019 07:00 - 30 minutes - 35.3 MBTaylor Looney, LMFT-A shares about her work with young adults. This episode is especially helpful for college-aged students and young adults who are single or early in their relationships. Overview: Taylor shares about how her work experience has given her insight into the importance of young adults knowing themselves well before getting serious in a relationship or moving toward marriage. Main Points of this Episode: It’s important to look out for red flags and warning signs early in...
Your Defensiveness in Your Relationship
October 14, 2019 07:00 - 14 minutes - 16.8 MBDefensiveness is hard to stop in yourself, and hurtful for your relationship. In this episode, we cover ways you can check yourself and calm yourself to not let defensiveness run wild in your heart and your relationship. Your defensiveness might be escalating arguments or putting up walls between you and your partner. Try to think back on an argument you’ve had with your spouse. Did it lead to you throwing accusations at them or giving them a long list of what they’ve done wrong? I imagi...
Your Spouse's Defensiveness and How You Can Respond
October 07, 2019 07:00 - 12 minutes - 14.2 MBDefensiveness in your relationship is harmful. It’s important for you to know how to respond when your spouse gets defensive, and how to communicate in a way that facilitates keeping guards down and listening to each other. Have you ever tried to have a conversation with your spouse, and they suddenly get upset, or snappy with you? Maybe you try to share a concern with them, even about something small, and they begin making excuses. Defensiveness can be even worse about bigger topics, li...
Time Together vs. Time Alone
September 30, 2019 07:00 - 13 minutes - 15 MBTime Together vs. Time Alone Finding a balance between your personal time and time spent with your partner can sometimes be challenging. You or your spouse might be really good at spending time alone, whether that’s for your self-care, your personal hobbies, or other activities. But if that’s the case, you may not be spending enough time together. On the other hand, you might both be good at spending all your time together, but you don’t take personal self-care time for yourself. Main po...
Time Together vs. Time Alone
September 30, 2019 07:00 - 13 minutes - 15 MBTime Together vs. Time Alone Finding a balance between your personal time and time spent with your partner can sometimes be challenging. You or your spouse might be really good at spending time alone, whether that’s for your self-care, your personal hobbies, or other activities. But if that’s the case, you may not be spending enough time together. On the other hand, you might both be good at spending all your time together, but you don’t take personal self-care time for yourself. Main po...
Your Relationship is Not a Fairytale
September 26, 2019 07:00 - 44 minutes - 43.4 MBYour Relationship is Not a Fairytale: Purposeful Love, with Morgan Huffines Morgan Huffines, LMFT-A talks about issues millennial couples face when the lust phase, or honeymoon phase, ends. Intimacy is about vulnerability. We have the rom-com idea of what we want our relationship to be like, but we never see what happens after the “happily ever after”. The “lust phase” is about early in a relationship, when hormones are excited and we interact based on this chemistry. It’s the fun and...
Relationship Roles in Your Marriage
September 23, 2019 07:00 - 11 minutes - 12.2 MBNavigating relationship roles can be challenging, especially early on in your relationship, or when you and your partner are facing seasons of change. In this episode, we discuss the ways your relationship roles might be defined, and how you and your partner can have honest and productive conversations to support each other and be flexible to changing roles. Whether you are tired of managing all the housework on your own, or you’re wanting to be able to do more and take some of the load off ...
Low Self-Esteem and Your Relationship
September 18, 2019 01:19 - 17 minutes - 18.8 MBLow self-esteem can take quite a toll on your relationship. In this episode, we’re digging deeper into understanding what low self-esteem is, the signs you can look for, and how your low self-esteem affects your relationship. We’re also talking about what you can do, individually and with your partner, to combat low self-esteem and strengthen your marriage. Main Points of this Episode: What does low self-esteem look like?: You might be really hard on yourself, or really sensitive to co...
Your Phone and Your Relationship
September 16, 2019 23:38 - 15 minutes - 16.2 MBOverview of this Episode: You and your partner might be feeling disconnected lately. And there’s a chance some of the disconnection could stem from too much focus being on the phone screen, and not enough focus on each other. With social media, group messages, emails, and any information you could ever think of needing or wanting in the palm of your hand, it’s so easy to get distracted from the world in front of you and the relationships around you. Romantic relationships get sidelined, a...
Introduction to Marriaging Podcast
September 15, 2019 19:31 - 4 minutes - 5.76 MBWelcome to the Marriaging podcast! This episode is created to give you a brief introduction to the podcast, and to share with you what you can expect moving forward. The goal of the Marriaging podcast is to help you approach your relationship with authenticity, to improve your communication and intimacy, and to create a more connected marriage.