Kickers of Elves
272 episodes - English - Latest episode: about 2 months ago - ★★★★★ - 82 ratingsDeep dives into art and media. We did five years dissecting Deep Space Nine with The Rules of Acquisition. Star Trek is overrated. We went in on David Lynch. That was fun. Now? Biding our time. It happens when it happens.
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Episodes
Appendix B: Hugh Speaks to Morn
June 22, 2016 18:37 - 33 minutes - 30.9 MBWait. This isn't an episode review! In a special episode, Hugh talks to Mark Allen Shepherd, the actor who played the silent alien barfly Morn for all seven seasons of DS9; and Eve Gideon, one of the fans behind a gofundme campaign to make sure Morn's chair at Quark's Bar isn't empty for Star Trek's 50th anniversary celebration in Las Vegas. Mark discusses getting cast, the origins of the character, and how it feels to have portrayed such a cult favorite among fans.
Season 1 Review
June 20, 2016 10:10 - 47 minutes - 44.3 MBA perfect jumping on point for new listeners. Don't feel like slogging through season 1 of DS9? You're in luck! We already did, so you don't have to! We take a break from breaking down individual episodes and talk about the season as a whole. Along the way we try and figure out... just what from Season 1 was worth salvaging? If this were a modern season of television how many episodes would there be? How much can one fix in editing... entire episodes away? We get in depth about what works so...
19. In The Hands Of The Prophets
June 13, 2016 08:59 - 58 minutes - 27.5 MBThat's it! We're at the end... ...of the first season; thank the Prophets. If you believe in that sort of thing. Two pretty good episodes back to back; are they realigning the show to be... good? Is it a miracle? Does that answer depend on your point of view? This episode has two issues it's good to stay away from at dinner parties: Religion and Politics. Wade, in fact, gets a little into his cups and perhaps overzealous. And definitely a bit crude with some information. We have a lot to say...
18. Duet
June 06, 2016 08:29 - 49 minutes - 23 MBNo time for ridicule, this is A Very Special Episode! Kira duets with a Cardassian, and three white guys from the bible belt get uncomfortable talking about the Holocaust. From post Cold War relations to The Man in the Glass Booth, Adolf Eichmann, and the Banality of Evil; how can art, and specifically science fiction, best approach some of these prickly topics? Lot's to talk about, and we might not fully cover every controversial subject, including AIDS, without being interrupted by the end...
17. Dramatis Personae
May 30, 2016 09:42 - 42 minutes - 19.9 MBAnother space day. Another space possession. Or not. Another space virus; this one turns people into paranoid jerks. We dissect this episode it and try to fix it as best we can. Some may like it more than we do... James has things to say about Ira Behr. Wade can't remember Rudy Ray Moore's name, but this episode is not about that. Sadly.
16. The Forsaken
May 23, 2016 20:07 - 46 minutes - 21.9 MBIn the interest of checking off all the obligatory characters from ST: TNG, Lwaxana Troi shows up in this episode! But wait! It's actually pretty good! She gets more intimate with a gooey Odo than she ever did with Picard. Is she more interesting without her daughter? Bashir is Pete Campbell. Technobabble. Obrien gets a puppy.
15. If Wishes Were Horses
May 16, 2016 11:07 - 49 minutes - 23.3 MBMore like "If Wishes Were Horses#!t." Yes, after last week's praise, we're back into the gutter! Obrien meets WHATISCERTAINLYNOTALEPRECHAUN. Nope, it's just another Alien of the Week. As Peter Dinklage said in Living in Oblivion: "Want to make it weird? Oh, put a dwarf in it." So we get "the Man from Another Place" himself, Michael J Anderson as a guest star. We talk about that, some other things, the Julian Problem, and the one good thing to stick around from this episode: Sisko's baseball.
14. Progress
May 09, 2016 09:41 - 42 minutes - 19.8 MBListen, and be amazed as we praise Kira's performance. Niners, be confounded by how little we actually talk about self sealing stembolts! Bajoran politics: Kira has to evict an old man from the Shire. Jake and Nog do a red paperclip story; the Ferengi hate land? We go on a tangent about what Marina Sirtis has had to put up with in her career (more than she should have had to). We disagree a bit, but agree this is a pretty good episode of Deep Space Nine, if not your standard Star Trek.
13. The Storyteller
May 02, 2016 09:06 - 47 minutes - 22.3 MBOne episode. Two stories. That. Don't. Interact. At. All. Nobody likes Julian, even O'brien, but things get set up for later. They yell at a smoke monster. Missourians know river politics. Wade is maybe puerile in what he notices in the set dressing. Jake and Nog hit on a girl. James talks libertarians. Hugh introduces a new segment, where we perhaps insult any listeners who are responsible for the IMDB episode ratings. Hope you're not offended. We love you... Speaking of... Rate us!
12. Battle Lines
April 25, 2016 10:22 - 53 minutes - 24.9 MBJonathan Banks! Plays a pissed off alien. Which he can pull off pretty well as you might imagine. Kai Alpaca, the Space Pope from the premiere comes back and sets things into motion... But mostly we're excited to see Jonathan Banks. That's Mike from Breaking Bad if you don't know who that is. Why don't you know who Jonathan Banks is?
11. Vortex
April 18, 2016 08:24 - 44 minutes - 21.1 MBThis week a couple of Gene Simmons steal a faberge egg, are double crossed by a space junkie, who turns out to actually be a space Mormon -who wears Odo's cousin around his neck- and everyone takes a trip to the least turbulent "vortex" in the galaxy. Does that make sense? No? Listen and figure out just what the heck I'm going on about. Plus: "Candy Man Caveman" and Wade's self loathing.
10. The Nagus
April 11, 2016 08:58 - 52 minutes - 24.7 MBUh oh. Hope you like the Ferengi. Our dang podcast title and artwork feature them so we can't throw stones. Wallace Shawn guest stars as a wrinkly talking "coin purse." Ferengi Juggalos!? Wade gets off topic and weird about Andrea Martin. Manservant Punk Rock Ronald Reagan. Education and racism are discussed, among other things.
9. Move Along Home
April 04, 2016 10:44 - 1 hour - 56.2 MBAre these aliens really into Yes? James wants to punch this episode in the face. Quality of the DS9 episode is directly proportional to how much fun we've had talking about it. We end with artsy nerd Sh#! Not to be confused with regular nerd sh#! but hey you're the one listening to a DS9 podcast so I hope you'll give us a pass.
8. The Passenger
March 28, 2016 09:54 - 39 minutes - 18.7 MBJulian gets possessed by the ghost of Hannibal Lector doing a bad Bela Lugosi impersonation. Maybe? There's gotta be a reason for what happened in the episode we talk about. Just how are we supposed to feel about that character, anyway? And we introduce "Angry Nerd Corner" (Wait, that's this whole show, right?) Go check out Hello Cruel World by the Tall Dwarfs... for no reason.
7. Dax
March 21, 2016 10:32 - 39 minutes - 18.7 MBHow do you fix a character like Maria?? Well, you make her a good character but don't make her try to impress anybody. But OH WAIT. We're talking Dax here. Not West Side Story. This is actually a good episode. LISTEN! (Was somebody drunk when they posted this description?)
6. Q - Less
March 14, 2016 09:04 - 45 minutes - 21.3 MBIt's a Q episode! Everyone's favorite (or least favorite) Trickster Space God boards the station with Picard's ex girlfriend to help remind you this is a spin off of that Star Trek show you really liked. Remember? Nudge nudge. Wink. Come for the TNG characters, stay to hear us talk about Ferengi sex practices, and vent our transporter frustrations. [Editors note: Oh, and yes we were wrong about the 3 life forms issue. It was the egg. We got it.]
5. Captive Pursuit
March 07, 2016 09:04 - 48 minutes - 22.7 MBWe quickly veer from the question of whether DS9 would be improved by some NYPD Blue style man-butt to consider "The Most Dangerous Game." After discussing Quarks employment contracts, however, we move on to the main storyline, a bro-mance between Obrien and a pudgy lizard-man.
4. Babel
February 29, 2016 10:29 - 34 minutes - 16.3 MBThe crew of DS9 gets infected with an aphasia virus, and we can't quite find the words... TV Pre and Post the time of Difficult Men. Sex positive Dax is back, and Odo is embarrassed, but we don't buy it. How do you fix episode? James has some good ideas.
3. Past Prologue
February 22, 2016 11:20 - 45 minutes - 21.4 MBWe all agree that Garak is one of our favorite characters as soon as he's introduced, hitting on Bashir(who we're less fond of at this point in the series). We also ask why Sisko isn't a captain yet (racism?), and theorize on the properties of gold pressed latinum.
Appendix A: Chaos On The Bridge
February 16, 2016 04:27 - 25 minutes - 11.9 MBBonus episode! But where's the DS9?! We take a detour to talk about a William Shatner directed documentary, the creative minds behind Star Trek, and argue whether adherence to the "grand vision" makes for awful television. Then we talk about awful tv in this current age of auteur showrunners (Looking at you True Detective, season 2). Overstock.com? If you're listening, we're available!
2. A Man Alone
February 15, 2016 09:46 - 53 minutes - 24.9 MBEpisode 2! We talk about stupid A plots, B plots, C... but mainly we talk about sex, sometimes crudely. Western motifs. Special men. Casual misogyny(?!). We cover it all! Also, we let slip a minor Dax spoiler at 21:35, but seriously, it's been 20 years now.
1. Emissary
February 08, 2016 09:26 - 1 hour - 31.3 MBWelcome to The Rules of Acquisition! A podcast where we’ll be reviewing every. single. episode. of Star Trek: Deep Space Nine. Heres... THE BEGININAGING Who are we? What are our histories with DS9? And most importantly-Why are we doing this? All these questions and more will be answered. Plus: Linear time, and don't trust Picard with your loved ones. [*NOTE: The sound may be a bit different in this first one where we were new and naive to the ways of podcasting. It's possible we'll find ...