Let's Kick it Like it's '66

Episode 152

Why, oh why, do I do this to myself? Here I am, a 53-year-old man, dragging myself out of bed at the ungodly hour of 4 AM in Japan, all to watch England play football. Yes, England. The team that insists on playing with my heartstrings like a cat with a ball of yarn.

So there I am, half-asleep, barely conscious, clutching my mug of coffee like it's a lifeline. The Euros are on, and it's England versus Switzerland in Germany. Penalties. Again. My nerves are shot. We win, but it's like watching a drunk tightrope walker: thrilling, terrifying, and you’re just glad they didn’t fall.

Next up, Holland. Great. More anxiety. I swear, watching England play is like having a second job that pays in heart palpitations and grey hairs. But then there's Saka. That lad. He steps up and scores his penalty, shoving it right up the arses of those racist idiots who abused him online three years ago. Talk about sweet revenge! If I wasn't so tired, I'd have danced around my living room.

But seriously, why do I put myself through this? The time difference is killing me. My internal clock is so messed up I wouldn't be surprised if I started sleepwalking. And the games! England are winning, but badly. It's like they’re playing a game of "How can we make this look as difficult as possible?"

I know, I know. I could just record the games and watch them at a reasonable hour. But where’s the fun in that? Live football is like a live horror movie: you can't look away, even though you kind of want to.

So here I am, anxiously waiting for the game against Holland. My brain’s yelling, "Why are you doing this? Get some sleep!" But my heart's whispering, "Come on, you know you love it." And it's right. For all the stress and early mornings, there's nothing like the thrill of the game, even when it feels like it might just kill me.

Besides, if Saka can face down his demons and shut up the racists, I can face a few early mornings and a bit of anxiety. Bring it on, Holland. Bring. It. On.

Music:

Take Me Out - Franz Ferdinand
Feel It Still - Portugal.The Man

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