we're here, we're queer, and we're VERY hospitable

I remember bartending at a place called ZED451 in Chicago and talking with different ambassadors when they came to visit the bar— it always seemed like such a great job but was typically either a really gorgeous woman or straight guy that fit the stereotype of a 'rugged' whisky/tequila drinker. Anyway, as a a gay man it felt like there was a barrier to entry. I was out as a gay man, but still somehow apologetic.  I was so excited to find that once I really embraced and integrated my full identity with my professional life that so many more doors opened up for me. Although our journey's have been different, there are a lot of similar experiences between this week's guest and I.

This week I spoke with my friend Cory James. Cory currently works as a brand ambassador in the world of spirits. When it comes to mental health, we often hear how “people pleasing” is antithetical to self advocacy. Often people pleasing stems from not getting one’s needs met earlier in life, and having to constantly adapt and adjust one's behavior to the needs of those around you.  But if we look at hospitality as a form of people pleasing, we see that with proper boundaries in place, there is a real gift and skill to anticipating the needs of another, to remaining hyper vigilant to their comfort and overall experience. Without proper boundaries however, this can spiral to constantly hustling for your worth and never prioritizing your own needs. It goes back to the whole airplane advice to put on your oxygen mask before trying to help those around you.

In this episode we discuss addiction, drug use, and homophobia. If you or someone you know is struggling with any of these issues, please visit these links to Narcotics Anonymous and The Trevor Project hotline.

If you are thinking about suicide or are feeling alone and need someone to talk to, please call the Trevor Lifeline at 1-866-488-7386 for immediate help. It’s free, confidential, and available 24/7.

HRC Corporate Equality Index