Understanding the secrets to having a happy marriage life is essential to the success of any marriage. It’s how you deal with the reality of marriage that sets in after the honeymoon phase that determines the success of that marriage.  

In today’s episode, Kristel is joined by John David Mann, an award-winning author of the Go-Giver series of books, and Ana Gabriel Mann, a psychotherapist, coach, and co-author of The Go-Giver Marriage book.

John and Ana share their insights on the secrets they have been using to have a successful marriage and what motivated them to author the ‘The Go-Giver Marriage’ book. Shifting your focus from yourself in a relationship and understanding how to support your partner is paramount for a healthy relationship. Appreciating the little things your partner does daily goes a long way in boosting their self-esteem and helping them become a better spouse.

When dealing with your spouse’s opposite-sex friends, it’s crucial to consider the motive of their friendship without being insecure. Some opposite-sex friendships could be work-related or business-related and are essential in helping your spouse grow in their personal life. However, there should be boundaries set in those friendships.

Ensuring you are growing at an individual level and becoming a better person each day will help your marriage grow also. You owe it to your partner to be the best partner you can be, and stagnating in individual growth translates to starving the marriage.  

Tune in!

KEY POINTS:

[01:54] Guests Introduction

[02:21] John Mann’s bio

[03:08] Ana Mann’s bio

[04:37] Foundational context of ‘The Go-Giver Marriage’ book

[08:15] Ana’s input on the ‘The Go-Giver Marriage’ book

[10:00] Effects of childhood wounds to the marriage

[12:06] How to deal with childhood wounds

[19:05] How to deal with opposite-sex friendships in relationships

[23:27] Developmental model of couple’s therapy for a healthy relationship

[32:20] Fixing a relationship that is growing apart

[36:23] The secrets to building your spouse’s esteem

[39:05] The ‘stay together or divorce’ question

[42:03] The secret of being generous with yourself by ensuring that you grow

[47:41] Why you should read ‘The Go-Giver Marriage’ book and the five secrets shared in the book

[49:33] How to connect with Ana and John and the classes they offer

[51:08] How to apply the five secrets to daily life

[53:20] Episode summary

QUOTABLES:

“What you needed when you were a child, you still need today.” [09:09]

“If you are looking for what they have done wrong, then you are not really looking for what they are doing  right.” [17:01]

“Criticizing your spouse to her face is toxic; criticizing her to other people is even more toxic.” [21:42]

“You are always either feeding the relationship or starving it.” [27:08]

“The purpose of marriage is to give yourself to another person and in the process become your best self.” [38:53]

“Your marriage is only going to be as strong as what you bring to it.” [42:13]

“For the marriage to grow, both individuals have to grow.” [43:16]

“You owe it to your partner to be the best you that you can be.” [43:53]

“Love is a practice, something you have to do every day.” [49:01]

“The really big changes in life are created by little things you do every day.” [51:25]

EPISODE RESOURCES:

Follow John on Instagram - @johndavidmann: instagram.com/johndavidmann

Follow Ana on Instagram - @anagabrielmann: instagram.com/anagabrielmann

Follow John on Twitter - @johndavidmann: twitter.com/johndavidmann

Follow Ana on Twitter - @anagabrielmann1: twitter.com/anagabrielmann1

Follow John on Facebook: facebook.com/johndavidmann

Follow Ana on Facebook: facebook.com/anagabrielmann 

Follow John on LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/johndavidmann

The Go-Giver Marriage Book: johndavidmann.com/books/the-go-giver-marriage

Website: johndavidmann.com

Workshop: gogivermarriage.com/programs

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