Episode 4: Pam. Overcoming The Grief of Infertility, Pregnancy Loss and Unwanted Childlessness

This podcast is for anyone who doesn’t have children and for anyone who loves someone who doesn’t have children!   It is for those who have struggled to conceive but also for those who have woken up one day and realised it is a little bit too late. It is also for anyone triumphant in their decisions to never have children in the first place. Everyone holds a rightful place in this conversation. Everyone. And that means you too, guys!   

My guest this week is Pam, who I met through a mutual friend. I visited Pam in her gorgeous home, which sits above her eclectic and skilfully curated furniture shop. The open area where we were sitting was bright and light and airy. The shade of green in the sofa and rug was the same shade as the lawn out the window, so it was as though the outdoors was a coordinated accessory to the indoors. When I mentioned it, she was glad I had noticed. It was a subtle but completely intentional feature.

It has been thirty years since Pam was trying for a baby and at this point, she is relieved to have her freedom whilst the rest of her friends with children are now struggling with what can sometimes be the burden of grandchildren. Pam’s perspective is refreshing to me in the sense that she is not dealing with raw pain around the topic, but she is more philosophical about the journey and about the drive to have children. Why do we want them so badly? Is it just biology? Is it to keep up with the Joneses? Is it to have cute subjects to post about on Instagram? Just what is it all about!?