More Stories

I love sitting here in my big, comfortable, manly, black leather poppa chair in my living room. It's a safe place to tell you some of my favorite stories. If I tried telling you some of them in person, you might be tempted to tell me to stop bothering you and go play some old Louie Louie Generation appropriate games...like walk scotch, hide and go sleep, or spin the hot water bottle. You might even want to attach a banana peel to the tip of my cane. But ha...I don't have a cane. But I do have some stories.
Here's one of my favorites. Once upon a time there was a scientist who cloned himself. One afternoon, the restless clone sneaked out of the lab, and ran down to a subway station, where he flashed all the passengers. When the scientist heard about it, he ran down to the subway station and ordered the perverted clone to stop flashing people. That scared the clone so badly because he had never seen the scientist so upset. He got so scared that he lost his balance and fell off the platform, right into the path of an oncoming subway train. Just then, the Transit Cops arrived and arrested the scientist for...making an obscene clone fall. THAT...is a terrible face you're making. Keep making faces like that and the next time you smile you could get a facial Charley Horse.