Gift Horse

Gift Horse 048: A Bro's Embrace of Hands / The Onion Nugget Petition

February 04, 2022 10:30 - 52 minutes - 49.6 MB

Mike and Tracy discuss and exchange discontinued products. What are the most unexpectedly lethal toys? Which Cheeto flavors did Mike kill? Whose birthday is it, and how does that affect the competitive collectible card game scene? Which synthesizer does Trent Reznor credit with revolutionizing music? You'll have to listen to find out.

Gift Horse 047: A Lot of Us Recycle / The Gregory Rift

January 28, 2022 10:30 - 50 minutes - 48.1 MB

Mike and Tracy prepare their minds for future knowledge using the knowledge-like shapes of animal facts. Mike shares an animal that thrives under the right circumstances. Tracy shares an animal that thrives when it's not being pummeled to death by every other living thing.

Gift Horse 046: Missing Is the Noid / Either 102 or 110 Lions

January 21, 2022 10:30 - 51 minutes - 48.6 MB

It's an exchange of commemorative gifts. Tracy gives Mike a weirdly bleak item intended for display, not play; Mike gives Tracy a real quarter muncher; and the UK has a rough day.

Gift Horse 045: God Wants Serifs / How Intractable My Love for Thee

January 14, 2022 10:30 - 41 minutes - 40.1 MB

It's time to define and exchange sacred oaths. Mike hopes to protect Tracy from the Internet. Tracy plans to... dethrone and kill God? That's just Gift Horse, little baby. The blog post Mike mentions in the episode is here: https://acoup.blog/2019/06/28/collections-oaths-how-do-they-work/

Gift Horse 044: Evening Family Kettlebell Swings / Cousins with Gameboys

January 07, 2022 10:30 - 51 minutes - 49.2 MB

Mike and Tracy prepare for a long, cold Iowa winter with a mix of creature comforts and radical electronic entertainment. Come for the spiked hot chocolate, stay for the frozen mustaches.

Gift Horse 043: The High Shelf with the Weird Cups / Let's Leave it at Thank You

December 31, 2021 10:30 - 55 minutes - 53.4 MB

In this 55-minute end-of-year celebration, Mike and Tracy review the podcast so far. What were their favorite gifts? What's up with the laser tag arena? And most importantly, who won the year? Attributions: "Ascending the Vale" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ Gotta Catch 'em All (Sad Version) Piano Arrangement by PianoDeuss https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pzl6gtj-tR8

Gift Horse 042: You Will Know Me by the Lushness of My Hair / Fartless Butt Koozie

December 24, 2021 10:30 - 45 minutes - 43.8 MB

Hark! the herald angels sing, "Glory to the newborn king. Peace on Earth and mercy mild, Mike and Tracy reconciled." Joyful all ye nations rise, join the triumph of these guys. Mike gives presents; Tracy gifts: butt Koozies and gaming rigs.

Gift Horse 041: Designated Secret Santa Drop Location / Non-Erotic Book Lamp

December 17, 2021 10:30 - 47 minutes - 45.4 MB

Mike and Tracy hide their love to gift as coworkers do. Mike receives a passable card game. Tracy receives a son. The cats are extra jolly throughout.

Gift Horse 040: Gourmet Condom Gift Set / Exclusively Canadian Animals

December 10, 2021 10:30 - 44 minutes - 42.9 MB

Mike subscribes Tracy to a monthly marker of manliness. Tracy subscribes Mike to a monthly mystery of meats.

Gift Horse 039: Carb Soup / Not So Much a Cast as a Cavalcade

November 26, 2021 10:30 - 42 minutes - 35 MB

Mike and Tracy work to revolutionize Thanksgiving. Will Tracy's pantry raiding philosophies prevail? Or will Mike's Gratitude Gang win the day?

Gift Horse 038: Flagship Squishmallow / The Pearl of Misery

November 19, 2021 10:30 - 50 minutes - 44.9 MB

Mike and Tracy flip through the hottest toys of the holiday season. Tracy's gift is a loud life-changer. Mike's gift is a source of lifelong shame.

Gift Horse 037: Pin It with a Burger Magnet / GameStop Acquired ThinkGeek

November 12, 2021 10:30 - 47 minutes - 42.4 MB

Tracy gifts Mike a very special, expensive appliance. Mike gifts Tracy a different but also very special, expensive appliance. They ate the same garbo frozen pizzas growing up.

Gift Horse 036: Duck It Down / It's Exercise 1 for a Reason

November 05, 2021 09:30 - 54 minutes - 49.3 MB

Mike and Tracy hit the open road. Mike gifts Tracy a long-awaited alternative to the burger diaper. Tracy gifts a solution for sleepiness that turns out to be an ingenious backdoor promo.

Gift Horse 035: Full Pick 'Em / Tailored to His Unique and Horrible Dimensions

October 29, 2021 09:30 - 41 minutes - 35.1 MB

The Rainmaker, Kazuchika Okada, wins a pyrrhic victory. Tracy gifts Frankenstein a delicate symbol of civilization. Mike gifts Frankenstein signifiers of wealth, plus the sheer brand heft and power of Madame BREE JACOBY.

Gift Horse 034 : Anti-Rigmarole / Drinking from the Brain Pan

October 22, 2021 09:30 - 43 minutes - 39.1 MB

Mike and Tracy are challenged to find a secret gift in the rapidly dwindling Halloween section of Walmart. Now the spooky results shall haunt their house for the rest of time.

Gift Horse 033: Napoleon vs. The Mayor / A Prison of Activity

October 15, 2021 09:30 - 49 minutes - 44.3 MB

Tracy gifts Mike an adventure befitting a French exile. Mike gifts Tracy an adventure of geographic riddles. Attribution: Monkeys Spinning Monkeys by Kevin MacLeod Link: https://incompetech.filmmusic.io/song/4071-monkeys-spinning-monkeys License: https://filmmusic.io/standard-license

Gift Horse 032: Laundry Pulverizing Market / Baby Yoda Could Infuse Some Tea

October 08, 2021 09:30 - 45 minutes - 40.3 MB

Mike gives Tracy a way to finally stop holding tacos and hot dogs. Tracy chickens out, buys Mike something both good and classy.

Gift Horse 031: Cheek Stroking Moratorium / Terrible Dorito Shirts

October 01, 2021 09:30 - 39 minutes - 36.1 MB

Tracy and Mike procure each other useful multiples. Tracy intuits the coming destruction caused by Mike's constant pull-ups. Mike honors Tracy's intense relationship with a nerdy wrestling tee.

Gift Horse 030: Not a Ghost Hole / Our Mothers, They Are Not Massaged

September 24, 2021 09:30 - 42 minutes - 39.9 MB

Mike and Tracy ponder a gift to prevent the recurrent disappearance of occupants from the house next door. Mike offers local goods and services with just a hint of the supernatural. Tracy shows up with the promise of spa treatments and home invasion. Acknowledgements: "Dewdrop Fantasy" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Gift Horse 029: If You're Shaq, You Have to Tell Us / The Kiosk Stink

September 17, 2021 09:30 - 42 minutes - 38 MB

Tracy and Mike critique the business plans of our nation's ailing mall kiosks. Along the way, Mike is gifted a mega lesson in hydraulics, and Tracy is gifted the world's first good custom-designed pet novelty item.

Gift Horse 028: Trust and Facts Ball / Unlimited Puck Touches

September 10, 2021 09:30 - 50 minutes - 45.1 MB

Mike's lawn game gift for Tracy is a totally original and innuendo-laden intellectual property. Tracy's lawn game gift for Mike comes fully playtested by drunk college students.

Gift Horse 027: Boolean Gold / Schrödinger's Friends

September 03, 2021 09:30 - 45 minutes - 40.4 MB

What gift do you get for the Monica, Chandler, Joey, Phoebe, Rachel, and Ross who have everything? Tracy obligates the Friends to spend up to six weeks a year on a boat that is emphatically not theirs. Mike confines the Friends to an underground dungeon with all the amenities. Attribution: Romi Golan - I'll Be There for You ("Friends" Theme) Piano Cover https://youtu.be/5B9QdWH23ls

Gift Horse 026: Judo Confidence Man / Sticker Authority

August 27, 2021 09:30 - 45 minutes - 41 MB

Mike's back-to-school gift will prep Tracy to throw any kid in the school. Tracy's back-to-school gift will make Mike somewhat more popular than the teacher.

Gift Horse 025: Steven's Bird Guide / Yeeted into the Darkness

August 20, 2021 09:30 - 42 minutes - 40.4 MB

Mike finally receives his badge for explaining the blockchain, among other accolades. Tracy's dancing is on par with the National Ballet, among other accolades. Both will leave the arena dripping with gold, but only one can win the episode. Acknowledgments: "Envision" by Kevin MacLeod is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 license. https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ Source: https://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/music.html Artist: http://incompetech.com/

Gift Horse 024: A Bike Is the Thing That a Kid Owns the Most / Stern Bike-os

August 13, 2021 09:30 - 46 minutes - 43.2 MB

Mike and Tracy gift each other vehicles. Along the way, Tracy confronts the question of who really owns a childhood bike, and Mike imagines the whimsical possibilities implied by the race car bed.

Gift Horse 023: All Aboard - Pizza Express / His Name Is Duderoni

August 06, 2021 09:30 - 44 minutes - 39.5 MB

Tracy celebrates pizza with a basket both literal and metaphorical. Mike celebrates pizza by combing the saucy depths of pizza Google. Attributions: Bushwick Tarantella by Kevin MacLeod is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 license. https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ Source: http://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1300002 Artist: http://incompetech.com/

Gift Horse 022: The Hemp Anniversary / You'll Be So Mad at How Good You Look

July 30, 2021 09:30 - 46 minutes - 41.1 MB

Mike celebrates 12 years of marriage with a new level of appreciation for (and expertise in) floral arrangement. Tracy celebrates 12 years of marriage with a hottie in a fine suit.

Gift Horse 021: Ain't No Law / The Air Bud Foundation for Survivors of Sports Film and Clowning

July 23, 2021 09:30 - 49 minutes - 61.3 MB

Tracy gifts Air Bud a complex tax situation. Tom gifts Air Bud a protracted Supreme Court battle. Mike gifts Air Bud a powerful piece of parchment. We all evince too much faith in the capabilities of this admittedly charismatic dog.

Gift Horse 020: Bringing the Hat Energy / Newtonian Brain Thinking Process

July 16, 2021 09:30 - 47 minutes - 42.2 MB

With great power comes great responsibility. Tracy now has to give everyone rides to the airport. Mike has to resist his natural inclination to become an evil god. The most important thing is that we all recognize and agree that Thor is not worth discussing.

Gift Horse 019: World's Oldest Plinko Warehouse / World's Grubbiest Stamp Collection

July 09, 2021 09:30 - 41 minutes - 37.3 MB

Tracy offers Mike some sea-worn game machines and a pre-rejection of an entire category of potential gifts. Mike offers Tracy 600 pounds of spit and a compelling new character, Mike "The Animal" Mike.

Gift Horse 018: Dog Used to Be a Suffix / When Computron Talks, Everyone Listens

July 02, 2021 09:30 - 49 minutes - 43.7 MB

Tracy's new nickname communicates power, crownability, and undeniable dinosaurness. Mike uses his cold, machine-like mind to pierce the veil of mystery that surrounds his latest appellation.

Gift Horse 017: The Book of Nice Nothings / Trials of the Bug God

June 25, 2021 09:30 - 43 minutes - 40.5 MB

Tracy solves Mike's interpersonal anxieties with the time-tested tome of teenage girls. Mike solves Tracy's bug fears with gladiatorial-style judgment (and a tiny gun).

Gift Horse 016: The White Man's Delusion / Self-Paced Oenophilia

June 18, 2021 09:30 - 43 minutes - 39.3 MB

Tracy gives Mike the gift of a well-researched, fart-focused tight five. Mike gives Tracy the gift of freedom to learn nothing about wine.

Gift Horse 015: Punk Rock Power Engravements / Jeremy's Trash Reminder Tumblers

June 11, 2021 10:00 - 45 minutes - 41.1 MB

Mike personalizes some lesser household tools to celebrate Tracy's career pivot. Tracy personalizes a thermos that surely anyone would be modestly happy to receive.

Gift Horse 014: Coffee Skull Is Nervous / Full Access Special Boy Floor Pass

June 04, 2021 09:30 - 47 minutes - 42.2 MB

Tracy loves the hot new countertop addition to Mike's morning routine. Mike loves treating Tracy to a tour of the convention level of the Baltimore Hilton Garden Inn.

Gift Horse 013: Engaging Fully with the Rock / One Must Imagine Sisyphus Pranking

May 28, 2021 09:30 - 45 minutes - 38.3 MB

Mike buys Sisyphus a distraction. Guest-host Catherine Nichols buys Sisyphus a group chat. Tracy has a completely, extremely different idea. You can find Catherine on Twitter @clnichols6, and her podcast Lit Century is available on the usual podcasting platforms, plus the LitHub at https://lithub.com/story-type/lit-century/

Gift Horse 012: Buoyant for the Human Butt / Hot Tub Party Trick

May 21, 2021 09:30 - 47 minutes - 43.5 MB

Tracy gifts Mike a new obsession with the finest in Swedish butt support. Mike's gift for Tracy is both steamy and surprisingly tensile. Neither is a sex thing.

Gift Horse 011: Five out of Ten Owl Points / The Gentle Charisma of Captain Pringle

May 14, 2021 09:30 - 49 minutes - 46.3 MB

Mike hooks up Tracy with a beautiful and intimidating new wrestling partner. Tracy connects Mike with the undisputed hub of the animal social network. Suggested reading: https://www.boredpanda.com/capybara-unusual-animal-friendship/

Gift Horse 010: Chonky Honker / A Full Tang

May 07, 2021 09:30

Tracy honors Mike's pacifism with an extremely long, leg-chopping blade. Mike makes plans for Tracy to rule all of Asia. Buttman 9000 hangs in the balance.

Gift Horse 010: Chonky Honker / A Full Tang

May 07, 2021 09:30 - 42 minutes - 37.6 MB

Tracy honors Mike's pacifism with an extremely long, leg-chopping blade. Mike makes plans for Tracy to rule all of Asia. Buttman 9000 hangs in the balance.

Gift Horse 009: Glamour Buns / Cold Ignoring the Common Grackle

April 30, 2021 09:30 - 45 minutes - 40.9 MB

Tracy begrudgingly ends a longstanding lawnmower standoff. Mike pre-digests programming up to and including anime.

Gift Horse 008: Pikachu's Gap Year / A Sidecar for Ash

April 23, 2021 09:30 - 47 minutes - 44.9 MB

Mike offers Pikachu a sweet ride. Tracy offers him the respect he deserves. Attribution: Gotta Catch 'em All (Sad Version) Piano Arrangement by PianoDeuss https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pzl6gtj-tR8

Gift Horse 007: The Wide Stance of a Star / A Sexy Garrote

April 16, 2021 09:30 - 43 minutes - 39.1 MB

Tracy's new look is equal parts pop idol and hug icon. Mike's signature accessory is tactful, tactical, and tactile.

Gift Horse 006: Pizza Foley / A Child's Dino

April 09, 2021 09:30 - 42 minutes - 37.4 MB

Mike's zoo boasts all colors and shapes of dino. Tracy am Grimlock and obey no rules. Attributions: Bushwick Tarantella by Kevin MacLeod is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 license. https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ Source: http://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1300002 Artist: http://incompetech.com/

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