For the Love of Climbing
69 episodes - English - Latest episode: 5 months ago - ★★★★★ - 565 ratingsThis is not a climbing podcast. Well, sorta. This is a podcast about choosing vulnerability and talking about our pain—and how we are all really just shining examples of this messy human existence.
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Episodes
55: A Price Too Big
December 01, 2023 13:28 - 45 minutes - 104 MBOn October 29, 2019, Michelle Xue and her climbing partner, Jenny Shedden, set off to climb Red Slate Mountain in the Sierra Nevada when they were struck by rockfall and killed. This story is told through the lens of her dear friend, Artem. While all genres of climbing can be dangerous, alpine climbing is likely the most. These stories of loss pay tribute to loved ones, but beyond that, the life of an alpine climber is complex. They say, “What’s done in love, is done well.” But the passion ...
54: Good Mom, Bad Mom
November 01, 2023 09:19 - 37 minutes - 5 MB“Are you a good witch or a bad witch?” Glinda asked Dorothy when she crash-landed in Oz for the first time. The theory of everything is that every element has an opposite. And by this logic, if there are, in fact, “good moms”, then it would follow that there must also be “bad moms”. But it doesn’t really work that way because the system of measurement that dictates the “good mom” / “bad mom” status is fundamentally flawed. When Tracy became a newly-minted mom, she was determined to find a w...
53: A Guy Walks Out of a Bar...
October 01, 2023 09:51 - 45 minutes - 5 MBAddiction is the kind of topic where judgment is easy, and empathy is hard. Shame is at the core of addiction. It thrives best in secrecy when we feel most alone, and keeps stories like these hidden in the dark. Lucas spent years, bouncing and skidding off the bottom before sobriety. But you know what they say: every unconscionable low point has a silver lining. Before long-term recovery, you could find Lucas on the road climbing full-time. He was the guy who could wax poetic around a cam...
52: My Friend Kris
September 01, 2023 12:01 - 29 minutes - 5 MBThis is Jess and Chelsea. They’re both climbers, they both live in Colorado. They both love dogs, and they’re forever inextricably tied together by these very common, uncomplicated things. They’re also forever connected because of this one very complicated big thing. In September of 2020, the climbing community lost Kris Ugarizza to suicide. Three years later, we’re sharing this story through the lens of two friends in order to promote more action and awareness on prevention. This podcast ...
Bonus Episode 51: 40 Years to Freedom (Part 2)
August 01, 2023 12:05 - 20 minutes - 5 MBAmin has been climbing for over 23 years, starting in Shiraz, a historical city in Iran. In 2017, he moved to the U.S. to work as a head routesetter, and was shot in a senseless act of violence that critically injured him and shook friends and family to their core. The irony of growing up in the Islamic Republic of Iran and never being afraid of guns until he moved to America is...sobering. Today, Amin remains deeply engaged in advocacy for Iranian people, especially women. He believes the ...
50: 40 Years to Freedom (Part 1)
August 01, 2023 12:00 - 30 minutes - 5 MBAmin has been climbing for over 23 years, starting in Shiraz, a historical city in Iran. In 2017, he moved to the U.S. to work as a head routesetter, and was shot in a senseless act of violence that critically injured him and shook friends and family to their core. The irony of growing up in the Islamic Republic of Iran and never being afraid of guns until he moved to America is...sobering. Today, Amin remains deeply engaged in advocacy for Iranian people, especially women. He believes the ...
49: Good Grief
July 01, 2023 12:40 - 1 hour - 5 MBThere are those who see grief as the final form of love—this one final act that we give to those we’ve lost. It’s also been said that it’s the price we pay for love, which is a funny way to look at it. But these two things unrelentingly go hand-in-hand.On September 2nd, 2021, Tara lost her dad to Covid. But…it's complicated. During that time, well-meaning folk comprised of climbers, liberal activists—even celebrities—condemned those who refused vaccination. Social media was filled with far-le...
48: We Are the Currents
June 01, 2023 11:19 - 45 minutes - 5 MBCivil discourse is a dying art, a complex practice that takes patience and well-rounded perspective to really master. Asking folks to be brave enough to make their convictions vulnerable means really listening, for both sides—it's not a one-way street. Surrounding ourselves with like-minded people is important to build community, but it doesn't mean that we should build walls to ignore opposition. That's not change. On an individual level, through clear and kind conversation, it's more possi...
47: How We Grow
May 01, 2023 12:18 - 31 minutes - 5 MBKids have a lot of questions when someone in their family is sick. But when you don't know to ask, certain things become the norm. In our parents' generation, bipolar disorder wasn't as widely talked about, nor given the compassionate treatment it deserves. Becca is changing that. Becca grew up with a dad who has bipolar disorder. She, herself, has been diagnosed with bipolar disorder and her research exploring the effects of climbing on women with mental illness and trauma, and the ways it...
Mini-Episode 11: Climbing Doesn't Change You
April 28, 2023 10:49 - 12 minutes - 5 MBWelcome back to the podcast. I’ve always been a huge advocate of change, but not always the good kind. Usually the “shake the snow globe, throw caution to the wind” chaotic kind. Lorca from episode sixteen, season three, sporadically sends a newsletter which, as a person who hates all newsletters because they melt me down into an unproductive diatribe about marketers who clearly have no regard for CAN-SPAM laws—I love receiving this one. This week’s newsletter subject line was “Resilience Lo...
46: Mason’s Retirement Sucks Tour
April 24, 2023 14:27 - 46 minutes - 5 MBWelcome back to the podcast. This is season five’s final episode which may or may not be two months late, but what are deadlines if not social constructs that we build to plan and schedule our lives around? And sometimes, life blows the fuck up and you roll with the chaos and see where it takes you. Mason went from pro-climbing to no-climbing after a slow descent into the depths of his illness. In 2018, he was diagnosed with ME/CFS—a complex, debilitating, long-term medical condition. Livi...
45: The Letter
January 01, 2023 17:31 - 54 minutes - 125 MBRebecca spent hours of her childhood, outside on her front lawn, catching caterpillars and fireflies. She was timid, liked to play alone, and was never one to venture off on her own to explore. Growing up, her mom’s addiction to alcohol infected so much of her life, so she wrote a letter about it. Rebecca so thoughtfully describes alcoholism as feeling like she’s losing someone, even though they’re alive. Climbing became the thing that allowed Rebecca to challenge the idea of who she was, ...
44: Mission Possible
December 01, 2022 14:07 - 39 minutes - 44.9 MBLucho grew up in San Francisco’s Mission District with the belief that the only way to survive his neighborhood was with the protection of a gang. So, he did the most logical thing: he joined a gang. Lucho started hanging out on street corners along the 24th St. Corridor and the next few years of his life were filled with gang fights, crime, and some really bad decisions. But finally, his mom intervened and an inner city kids wilderness backpacking trip led Lucho to rock climbing. He moved ...
43: Becoming Katie
November 01, 2022 11:58 - 43 minutes - 49.9 MBIf you Google “Katie Brown” on the internet, there’s a Reddit thread called “What Ever Happened to Katie Brown?” and that’s a valid question. Katie wasn’t just a professional climber at the age of thirteen—she didn’t just win the X Games at fourteen or onsight the northwest face of Half Dome or snag the first female free ascent of the Leaning Tower with Lynn Hill. She wrote a book! She wrote two books, in fact. She became a mom. She started healing her old wounds from childhood and left beh...
42: Something's Gotta Give
October 01, 2022 11:36 - 40 minutes - 55.8 MBThe world of adaptive sports is changing, and quickly. Ronnie’s disability hasn’t held him back, but social stigmas that are still caught behind in outdated narratives can. And that’s where change comes. It takes a community, and Ronnie asks himself every day how he can make a difference. The answer is simple—one at a time. Prosthetic and Orthotic Associates of Tennessee Instagram Facebook For the Love of Climbing is presented by Patagonia. Additional support is from Deuter USA, Gnarly N...
41: Emily “Gwyneth Paltrow Rocked Apple” and She Doesn’t Want a Lemon Baby
September 01, 2022 16:37 - 49 minutes - 68.7 MBEmily miscarried in March of 2021 and she struggled with how the experience felt so shameful. It was her job to keep him alive and growing, after all—right? Except, one of the worst parts about miscarriage is that it isn’t caused by the action, behavior, or even body of the pregnant person in the majority of cases, but despite this information, there’s still a lot of confusion and silence around this topic. “Mention the baby” is written all over the hashtags for miscarriage and pregnancy lo...
40: Lowest Common Denominator
August 01, 2022 12:00 - 52 minutes - 59.9 MBKyle destigmatizes substance use and mental health by opening up about his own journey through recovery after a two-decade-long battle with drugs and alcohol that almost took his life in October of 2021. His fear of failure, fear of falling, and fear of inadequacy don’t compare to the fear of not living a full life. Kyle’s path to being substance-free embraces some of fear’s corresponding counterparts—joy, success, the exhilaration of free-fall, and the inner sanctum of the non-comparative ...
39: Where the Redwoods Grow
July 01, 2022 13:16 - 37 minutes - 42.9 MBSavannah lived in a truck for a year in an attempt to pursue a career in adventure photography. She learned that the privilege to electively suffer still comes at a cost. It didn’t give her more time with her aunt, but it did give her the ability to bloom with a new season, to grow big enough to hold both love and grief simultaneously. Because grief, at its deepest core, is an act of love itself. For the Love of Climbing is presented by Patagonia. Additional support is from Deuter USA, Gnar...
38. Are You Safe There?
June 01, 2022 12:50 - 45 minutes - 52.6 MBDan always knew he was different growing up, but he didn’t have a name for it. Growing up gay in rural America shaped the way he moved through the world, and it led him to believe that the outdoors wasn’t a safe place for him. This podcast unequivocally supports the LGBTQIA community. Episode thirty-eight discusses suicide and depression. If you’re struggling with mental health, please check out the show notes for more resources at fortheloveofclimbing.com, and take care of yourselves while...
37. The Arc
May 01, 2022 08:54 - 1 hour - 77.7 MBPam didn’t have a lot of tragedy in her life, so she didn’t know about the arc. And as a grieving person, it was hard to look forward to anything, especially on top of the pandemic. But the world started opening up again, and she and her husband Jim rode 1,300 miles self-supported from the coast of Oregon to Montana last summer. When Jim started not feeling well, they decided to return home to California. And it was almost like she had a little bump, so she was devastated when they had to c...
Mini-Episode 10: Hope is Here
April 25, 2022 12:37 - 26 minutes - 60.5 MBHope isn’t perpetual optimism. It’s an inherent part of being human that requires determination for things to change for the better. We’re back this May with ten new stories from climbers about what hope means to them. Because life can be full of sucker punches, but that doesn’t mean you stop breathing. In fact, the whole point is that you get up, learn something, pass on whatever slice of happiness or nugget of wisdom to others, and move forward. Because there’s always hope on the other s...
36: The Climber & the Poet
February 01, 2022 14:09 - 1 hour - 74.3 MBClimbing can be, er, kinda selfish. We go up, we go down—and then we do it all over again. It's also where Oliver and Alyssa’s interests diverge. For some, that’s a dealbreaker. Is this lifestyle sport so unique that it’s the be-all-end-all for relationships? Maybe. For the Love of Climbing is brought to you by Deuter USA, Gnarly Nutrition, Allez Outdoors, and presented by Patagonia. Music by: Kakurenbo and Chad Crouch. Additional music is licensed by Music Bed. A HUGE thank you to Chad C...
35: The Bipolar Ape
January 01, 2022 13:18 - 54 minutes - 75.1 MBHumans are capable of acts of such bravery but also, acts of such cowardice from one moment to the next. And of course, sometimes we’re going to do terrible things—and sometimes, we’re going to do amazing and beautiful things. For the Love of Climbing is brought to you by Deuter USA, Gnarly Nutrition, Allez Outdoors, and presented by Patagonia. Music by: Kakurenbo and Chad Crouch. A HUGE thank you to Chad Crouch for creating absolute magic, and to Peter Darmi for mixing this episode. Cov...
34: Dreamers Only
December 01, 2021 12:54 - 45 minutes - 52.4 MBDreams don’t just fall into our heads out of nowhere. They require patience, self-compassion, and the courage to pursue them, regardless of the odds. Debbie credits her resilience to her childhood struggles in Catalonia and learned that sometimes, you have to travel to the other side of the world to discover what moves you the most. For the Love of Climbing is brought to you by Deuter USA, Gnarly Nutrition, Allez Outdoors, and presented by Patagonia. Music by: Kakurenbo and Chad Crouch. A ...
33: From the Inside, Out (Part 2)
November 01, 2021 13:21 - 31 minutes - 36.5 MBThis is one transgender climber’s story. And it’s hard to sum up in just a few sentences not just Lor’s identity, but the human being that they are. The impact that they’re having on our community in a meaningful way, and how it’s growing because of it. Just by simply existing. This is part two of a two-part story. For the Love of Climbing is brought to you by Deuter USA, Gnarly Nutrition, Allez Outdoors, and presented by Patagonia. Music by: Kakurenbo and Chad Crouch. A HUGE thank you to...
32: From the Inside, Out (Part 1)
November 01, 2021 13:20 - 39 minutes - 54.1 MBLor had to decide. They could go on hating themself, or could be a part of making the world a place that was more healed—and that started with healing themself. This is part one of a two-part story. For the Love of Climbing is brought to you by Deuter USA, Gnarly Nutrition, Allez Outdoors, and presented by Patagonia. Music by: Kakurenbo and Chad Crouch. A HUGE thank you to Chad Crouch for creating absolute magic, and to Peter Darmi for mixing this episode. Cover photo by Kika MacFarlane. ...
31: Sober as F***
October 01, 2021 13:45 - 38 minutes - 43.9 MBWhat role does excessive boozing in a community of athletes play? And let’s be really clear—this isn’t just the outdoor industry and trade show happy hours. It’s not about climbing culture or the river or ski or mountain biking community, or even the outdoor community at large.America has a drinking problem, and Ari’s story isn’t unique. It prompts us to ask the question of why we’re drinking in the first place—is it coping or conviviality?For the Love of Climbing is brought to you by Deuter ...
30: The Prince
September 01, 2021 13:46 - 43 minutes - 59.2 MBPhillip Schaal, an elite rock climber and one of the world’s best boulderers at the time, died in 2016 after a severe reaction to a suspicious drug overdose, as told by his mother Eloise. Francois Lebeau described Phillip as an “underground machine”. “Quiet and humble”, Phillip was always doing his own thing and “shied away from the media limelight”. Phillip’s story is told through Eloise’s lens and experience. For the Love of Climbing is brought to you by Deuter USA, Gnarly Nutrition, Alle...
29: Cat Like a Cat
August 01, 2021 14:41 - 1 hour - 69.6 MBWe’re increasingly pressured to parcel ourselves up in various social contexts, but identity is complex. Being transgender is just another way of being human, and the beauty within that is that it can mean whatever you want it to mean. For the Love of Climbing is brought to you by Deuter USA, Gnarly Nutrition, Allez Outdoors, First Ascent Coffee, and Patagonia. Music by: Kakurenbo. A HUGE thank you to Chad Crouch and Skyler Kergil for creating absolute magic, and to Peter Darmi for mixi...
28: Brittany
July 01, 2021 08:58 - 5 MBIn 2017, a forty-foot fall broke Brittany’s L1 vertebrae, sending a piece of bone into her spinal cord. She describes it as one of those surreal dreams where you wake up and think, “Thank God—that wasn’t me standing in my underwear in front of the entire classroom. It wasn’t real.” Except, after she woke up—shit got real. But Brittany has been gritting her way through life long before her accident. Most people run from a past like Brittany’s. But after falling forty feet, Brittany didn’t hav...
27: A Splash in the Pan
June 01, 2021 13:49 - 58 minutes - 67.4 MBOn April 16th, 2019, elite climbers Jess Roskelley, David Lama, and Hansjörg Auer lost their lives in an avalanche climbing Howse Peak in Alberta’s BANFF National Park. The margin of error for alpinism is unnervingly thin, and the truth of it all is that you are not in control—the mountain is. And it took losing Jordan’s brother, Jess, to learn this unforgiving lesson. "And even when I was close to defeat, I rose to my feet, my life a soundtrack, I rose to the beat." -Dr. Dre This episode ...
26: I’m a Liver, Not a Fighter
May 01, 2021 11:48 - 36 minutes - 42.1 MBCedar, who was named after a tree, has something called Progressive Familial Intrahepatic Cholestasis, otherwise known as PFIC 2. This devastating genetic disorder affects 1 in 50,000 to 1 in 100,000 live births and, if untreated, can be fatal by the age of twenty. Visit http://pfic.org for more information. This episode is brought to you by Deuter USA, Gnarly Nutrition, Allez Outdoors, First Ascent Coffee, and Patagonia. Music by: Kakurenbo and Podington Bear. Additional music licensed...
Mini-Episode 9: I Did Not Know
April 26, 2021 12:34 - 19 minutes - 26.9 MBHow do you measure something that definitively changes your life forever—whether it be for better or worse? Like, what kind of metrics are we supposed to be using for that kinda thing? Is the entire idea of “change” just an arbitrary construct, something that we make up to make ourselves feel better? Since the start of the pandemic, life has been nothing but change. So, we thought it was a good time to ask folks how climbing changed their lives, and was it really for the better? Not to get a...
25: A Knot Like Infinity
February 01, 2021 12:53 - 1 hour - 73.3 MBLast September, North Bennett sent me a personal essay and told me that he thought it wasn’t send-y enough for most sports publications, but also a little too climb-y for others. And—that’s where we come in. As it turns out, it was actually *just* the sort of story that we’d share on this podcast. “A Knot like Infinity” is putatively about seeking romance on Tinder and climbing with friends, but really takes on the topics of self-image, self-representation, and the value of friendship.
24: The Process
January 01, 2021 12:24 - 46 minutes - 53.4 MBJust shy of twenty 5.12 free solos, Austin Howell had climbed nineteen unique routes without a rope—one of them without shoes and butt ass naked. In 2019, Austin died free soloing in Linville Gorge, North Carolina. His love for climbing is hard to capture with words alone, so we flew to Minnesota in the summer of 2019 to borrow some of Susan’s. Austin's story is complicated, but as the pendulum in life swings both ways, he embraced both its highs and lows and especially reveled in the joy th...
23: Si me muero, me muero
December 01, 2020 13:05 - 40 minutes - 46.9 MBJack used to do all the things, like surfing and jiu jitsu. But an incomplete spinal cord injury in 2018 changed his plans indefinitely. What’s a little neck fracture at C4 and C5, right? It still hasn’t slowed him down and his accident unknowingly gave him the foundation for understanding risk and its counterpart, the consequences of rock climbing.
22: The '59 Sound
November 01, 2020 12:32 - 50 minutes - 116 MBOn March 9th, 2016, Eric was working on linking the crux moves of Moonlight Buttress, one of the most classic test pieces for hard climbing in North America, when he fell from the upper pitches to his death. This is just one part of Eric’s story, who played a huge part in Hayley’s life. This is also a story about the stereotypes of gender and emotional expression, the importance of self-love, and the trajectory of grief.
21: Come As You Are
October 01, 2020 14:29 - 46 minutes - 53.6 MBBody positivity isn’t about “fat” versus “skinny”, despite barrages of criticism from armchair philosophers. The body positivity movement is about feeling comfortable in the skin you’re in now, at this very moment. And it’s not just a women’s issue, but where do men stand in this movement? The more we invite men to the table to have conversations about male body concept, the more the foundation of toxic masculinity will crumble. This movement is for every body—and you can come as you are.
20: Sarah
September 01, 2020 14:29 - 47 minutes - 54.6 MBAddiction is a need-hate relationship. It can be a terrible secret, it can frame the very shape of your life. It’s the white noise behind many lives, and everyone’s experience with it is unique. For those who suffer from addiction, there’s a steep price to pay. Sarah learned what that price was.
19: Light at the End of the Tunnel
August 01, 2020 15:04 - 57 minutes - 66 MBThroughout America’s history, hallmarks of our democracy have been largely reserved for cis white people through intentional exclusion of BIPOC people. Connie and Kai Lightner call attention to the role of race and how racism in the outdoor industry, public and private institutions still disproportionately segregates and oppresses Black people in 2020. In the midst of a revolution and pandemic, things have felt pretty bleak to a lot of people. There is a light at the end of the tunnel, but t...
18: Life Through a Sieve
July 01, 2020 14:19 - 32 minutes - 74.7 MBGoing through a traumatic experience is kind of like putting your life through a sieve. In 2009, Kareemah was diagnosed with cancer and underwent an amputation on her left leg below the knee. This episode is about strength in visibility and what happens when the narrative shifts from; “you don’t belong here” to “you belong here, you exist, and you matter”.
17: What We Know
June 01, 2020 14:47 - 42 minutes - 97.8 MBIf you’ve been paying attention to the news, this is what we know: Ahmaud Arbery, Breonna Taylor and George Floyd are victims of three separate crimes against black people. Cases like these have raised questions about racial profiling. We still have a lot of work to do, and that work begins by listening to one another—especially to those who have the least power in society. Healing begins by listening to those voices and their stories. Also, Mikey Schaefer makes a quick cameo—how random is t...
16: A Hunger For Joy
May 01, 2020 14:43 - 52 minutes - 96.2 MBOn May 12, 1986, students and teachers from the Oregon Episcopal School Basecamp Program set off to climb Mt. Hood. Three days later, nine of the climbers would die in what’s known as the second deadliest alpine accident in North American history. At age sixteen, Lorca Smetana survived the 1986 Mount Hood Tragedy and has transformed a series of painful experiences into a life of resilience and leadership. Is this the Brené Brown episode of climbing podcasts? Maybe. Welcome back to season thr...
Mini-Episode 9: How The F*ck Are You? (No, really.)
February 02, 2020 02:06 - 26 minutes - 60.3 MBWe’ll be back on April 1st with two new full episodes. Until then, enjoy two mini-episodes today and on March 1st while I try to do things like not burn a film festival into the ground (just kidding...I think!) and if you’re in Denver, Colorado March 5th through 8th, come out to the No Man's Land Film Festival Annual Flagship event for four days of films, workshops and guest speakers. This mini-episode is comprised of episode ten with Corey Mowery, which if you haven’t listened to yet, we hi...
Mini-Episode 8: How The F*ck Are You? (No, really.)
February 02, 2020 02:06 - 26 minutes - 60.3 MBWe’ll be back on May 1st with new episodes. Until then, enjoy a mini-episode while I try to do things like not burn a film festival into the ground (just kidding...I think!) and if you’re in Denver, Colorado March 5th through 8th, come out to the No Man's Land Film Festival Annual Flagship event for four days of films, workshops and guest speakers. This mini-episode is comprised of episode ten with Corey Mowery, which if you haven’t listened to yet, we highly recommend. Also, who is this “we...
A Winter in Pakistan
January 01, 2020 17:02 - 50 minutes - 115 MBWhen you go on a climbing trip, everybody thinks it’s a vacation. And you can’t get PTSD from a vacation, right? Except that a winter in the Himalaya nearly destroyed Ian. He survived unroped crevasse falls, an avalanche, bivouacs in negative forty-degree weather, high altitude cerebral edema, Hepatitis A, an earthquake, oh—and also, nearly being eaten alive by fleas. When he returned to the states, he couldn’t cope with society and suffered from severe depression and PTSD.
15: A Winter in Pakistan
January 01, 2020 17:02 - 50 minutes - 115 MBWhen you go on a climbing trip, everybody thinks it’s a vacation. And you can’t get PTSD from a vacation, right? Except that a winter in the Himalaya nearly destroyed Ian. He survived unroped crevasse falls, an avalanche, bivouacs in negative forty-degree weather, high altitude cerebral edema, Hepatitis A, an earthquake, oh—and also, nearly being eaten alive by fleas. When he returned to the states, he couldn’t cope with society and suffered from severe depression and PTSD.
14: Donuts for Savvy (Part 2)
December 01, 2019 12:55 - 46 minutes - 106 MBTo know Savannah was to love her. Nina and Court loved Savannah to the ends of the earth, and her unexpected death forever changed the climbing community. In their love and grief, Savannah’s parents turned everything that she was into purpose. Savannah left the world with a legacy of love, joy, and gratitude. Introduction by the lovely Chelsea Rude.
13: Donuts for Savvy (Part 1)
November 01, 2019 12:30 - 72.7 MBGrief is the one human experience that we all have in common, but there are no words for losing a child. Savannah Buik was 22 years old when she died in a climbing accident at Devil’s Lake in Wisconsin. Nina and Court saw both sides of the pendulum: how the stronger and deeper we love, the harder it is to overcome the pain on the other side. This is part one of a two-part story. Savannah credited climbing for helping her overcome her eating disorder, and she dedicated her life to healing ot...
12: Life, Interrupted
October 01, 2019 11:41 - 46 MBLife is full of interruptions we’re rarely ready for, so the more doctors tried to convince Hans how serious his condition was, the more he denied it. We most commonly associate grief with death, but what about the softer versions of grief? Like, grieving the loss of a relationship or an old life, or maybe a kidney?