The Strongest Parenting Tool You Have: EMPATHY

Everyone is dealing with Quarantine in their own way. If your child is acting out or you feel like you are constantly in a power struggle, try utilizing empathy. Consider why your child is in this state and allow for her to have these feelings and then address them when things are calmer. Showing empathy is respectful and will allow for a deeper connection with your child.

TRANSCRIPT
Alright I’m going to be honest here. When I was a little girl, I got spanked a lot. At least, that’s how I remember it. Now that I’m a parent I can see how it is so easy to lose your cool and how kids somehow find the perfect ways to get under your skin. But that shouldn’t fuel the way you’ve chosen to parent. There are a lot of variables but my experience definitely influenced the way I’ve chosen to raise my kids.

I am a firm believer in empathetic parenting. When we put ourselves in our children’s shoes discipline takes on a different form. Rather than correcting or fixing, you are supporting and nurturing. This is so critical right now during this time of isolation and complete deprivation of life as we knew it. Kids are so vulnerable right now and it is more important than ever to show empathy and respect. 

I’ve been needing to remind myself of this often. Being cooped up all day with no breathing room makes it hard to deal with everyone. On the days I have a short fuse or things aren’t going how I want, its easy to snap at the smallest of offenses. I have to keep reminding myself to be empathetic. My kids haven’t seen anyone in weeks. School was abruptly stopped. Their life is so different and the adjustment period is not easy for anyone and it also looks different for everyone. Some kids may be acting out, some may be picking fights with their siblings. Some may be in complete defiance mode. This is frustrating. But by putting yourself in your child’s shoes, you are giving them respect. Respect and understanding that its ok to make mistakes, and its ok to not know how to deal with these changes.

So my quick tip today which is a big for me is that the next time your child does something they shouldn’t, first ask yourself why, why did he do that? And then adjust your response to show respect and nurturing instead. If there is a deeper issue you can identify, try working on it when things are calm. Remembering that your child is going through a hard time and being a buffer for those feelings will help make the transition more tolerable for you both.