Ep 86 | Dear Business Owner: Leave Your Emotions Out of It. with Aaron Potraz, LPC

Finding Community and Retreats for Therapists

Hey there, welcome back to Soul Care for Therapists! Get ready for an amazing episode filled with excitement and inspiration. But before we jump right in, let me share something truly special with you. Recently, I attended an extraordinary conference that brought together group practice owners. The energy, friendship, and pure joy I experienced there were absolutely invigorating! This got me thinking about the incredible importance of finding a community of therapists who understand and support us. If you haven't already, I strongly encourage you to seek out a group of like-minded practitioners who can be your rock-solid support system. And hey, if you're having trouble finding one locally, I've got you covered! I offer Sacred Space Community Groups and an incredible retreat that can help you connect with others and experience revitalization. You can find all the details on my website. Picture this: a retreat that promises renewal, rest, and endless fun in the breathtaking beauty of the Colorado mountains. Now, let's dive into the highlights of this week's show!

Emotional Reactions in Leading a Team in a Private Practice

Dawn introduces her special guest, Aaron Potaz, a licensed professional counselor and the owner of Discover Counseling. Aaron shares insights on the challenges faced by therapists as they lead a team, highlighting the emotional reactions that often arise in such situations. He explains that these emotional reactions can complicate decision-making and hinder problem-solving. Aaron emphasizes the importance of managing and setting aside these emotions to gain clarity.

Even though we are therapists we can often struggle to acknowledge and validate our own emotions. Aaron advises therapists to start by acknowledging their emotions and being honest with themselves. He suggests identifying and validating the feelings, recognizing that it's natural to have emotional responses. Aaron shares the importance of permitting oneself to experience these emotions without judgment. By validating and accepting their feelings, therapists can move past them and gain a clearer perspective. "In order to move past your feelings, you've gotta know what your feelings are... Let's look at the facts more objectively now that I'm not really as reactive." - Aaron Potaz

As therapists, it is easy to slide into compassion mode and put our business mind and owner responsibilities in the back seat. The trick is to balance compassion and objectivity. Dawn appreciates Aaron's ability to blend compassion with a strong business mindset. Aaron explains that therapists can maintain their compassion while focusing on problem-solving and being objective. He notes that compassion doesn't have to be an "active ingredient" in every situation but can still underlie one's approach to leadership. Aaron shares that by managing their emotions and staying true to themselves, therapists can become better problem solvers. "Why can't you be both?... You can be compassionate without reacting from fear." - Aaron Potaz

Navigating Emotional Reactions as a Therapist Business Owner

Dawn and Aaron delve deeper into navigating emotional reactions, providing practical tips for therapists leading a team. They emphasize the importance of self-awareness and owning one's feelings rather than suppressing them. By identifying and acknowledging emotions, therapists can move toward problem-solving and taking appropriate action.

Dawn highlights the significance of vulnerability and self-reflection in addressing emotional reactions. She mentions how feedback from trusted colleagues helped Aaron recognize his feelings and the need to manage them more effectively. Aaron shares his journey of embracing vulnerability, understanding his feelings, and validating them without allowing them to hinder problem-solving. "I don't need to have those feelings... they're actually very not helpful. And so as I move to understand my feelings and accept that, yeah, I do have some of them, and yet... I could actually be more consistently myself." - Aaron Potaz

Aaron suggests two scenarios for addressing emotional reactions with team members. In the first scenario, where an issue arises via email or other means, therapists should engage in self-work, consult with their mastermind groups or trusted colleagues, and then schedule a meeting with the team member. The second scenario involves addressing the issue face-to-face during a meeting. Aaron emphasizes the importance of clear communication, focusing on facts, and seeking understanding without being reactive.

Striking the Balance: Being Liked and Respected in the Workplace, A Private Practice Owner’s Struggle

Many of us face the challenge of being liked while not forgetting the importance of respect. Dawn and Aaron share their experiences and insights on this topic.

Dawn explained how it's natural to want positive relationships at work, but we should never forget to respect ourselves and the respect we earn as leaders. When we focus too much on being liked, we might end up making decisions that aren't right or crossing professional boundaries. That's not good for our effectiveness as leaders.

Aaron reminds us that respect and likability can go hand in hand. As therapists and business owners, we need to create a supportive environment while also making those tough choices and holding others accountable. Sometimes, doing what's best for the team and the practice means making decisions that may not be popular right away. Striking a balance between being kind and assertive is key to gaining respect for our expertise and leadership.

Dawn added as therapists and business owners, our main focus should be providing excellent care and maintaining high professional standards. While we want good relationships with our team, our client's well-being and the success of our practice should come first. Make steps to set clear expectations, make informed choices, and communicate effectively. By doing so, we can create a workplace where both respect and likability thrive together.

Remember, take a moment to reflect on your motivations. Are you prioritizing being liked over respecting yourself and others? Seek feedback from your team and trusted colleagues, and never forget to prioritize your self-respect. With these tips, you can foster a healthy work environment where both respect and likability can shine. 

The Power of Being Direct: Insights from a Private Practice Owner

Dawn and Aaron explored the importance of being direct. They shed light on the common challenge of trying to be liked and the potential pitfall of sacrificing respect in the process. 

According to Dawn, being direct is crucial when it comes to effective communication. She emphasizes the need to prioritize clarity over the desire to be liked. In her own words, "By being direct, we can avoid misunderstandings and ensure our message is heard." Sometimes, we may hesitate to be direct because we fear it could upset others or damage relationships. However, as Aaron adds, "Being direct doesn't mean being rude or disrespectful. It's about being honest and open in a considerate manner." Sometimes being direct is kindness. 

They both agree that being direct helps us maintain respect for ourselves and others. Instead of beating around the bush or avoiding difficult conversations, being direct allows us to address issues head-on. Aaron explains, "When we're clear and direct, we create a foundation of trust and transparency." By being upfront and honest, we can build stronger connections and work towards resolving conflicts more effectively.

Embrace the power of being direct! Remember, being direct doesn't mean being mean or disrespectful. It's about communicating with clarity, honesty, and respect. By doing so, we can avoid misunderstandings, foster trust, and strengthen our relationships. Don't be afraid to be direct—it's a superpower that can lead to better understanding and growth!

Unleash Your Superpowers as a Therapist

Wow, what an enlightening journey we've embarked on today! We've discovered the secrets to navigating emotional reactions and the importance of striking a balance between being liked and respected. Remember, as therapists, we possess incredible superpowers that can transform lives. But to unleash these powers, we need to be direct, honest, and compassionate leaders.

Being direct doesn't mean being rude or hurtful—it's about communicating with clarity and openness, which fosters understanding and trust. By embracing our power to be direct, we create a solid foundation for effective communication and problem-solving. We can avoid misunderstandings, build stronger connections, and grow both personally and professionally.

So, my fellow therapists, let's prioritize our self-respect and the respect we earn from others. Let's make informed decisions, set clear expectations, and communicate effectively. By doing so, we create a work environment where respect and likability go hand in hand, and our clients receive the excellent care they deserve.

Remember, you are capable of amazing things! Seek feedback, embrace vulnerability, and always prioritize your own well-being. Together, we can foster a community of therapists that uplifts and supports one another. Keep shining your light, and let your superpowers as a therapist make a positive impact on the world. You've got this!

5 Tips for Being a Direct, Honest, and Compassionate Leader

Communicate with Clarity: When addressing your team or colleagues, be clear and concise in your communication. Clearly express your thoughts, ideas, and expectations. Avoid using vague language or beating around the bush. By being clear, you help others understand your message and foster a transparent work environment.

Embrace Openness and Honesty: Be honest and transparent in your interactions. Encourage open communication among your team members, and lead by example. Share your thoughts, feelings, and feedback in a considerate manner. When you demonstrate honesty, you build trust and create a safe space for others to express themselves freely.

Balance Compassion and Objectivity: As a leader, it's essential to balance compassion with objectivity. Show empathy and understanding towards your team members, but also make decisions based on what's best for the overall well-being of the team and the organization. Avoid letting personal biases or emotions cloud your judgment.

Seek Feedback and Embrace Vulnerability: Actively seek feedback from your team and trusted colleagues. Encourage them to share their thoughts, suggestions, and concerns. Embrace vulnerability by acknowledging your own mistakes and areas for growth. This fosters a culture of continuous improvement and shows that you value and respect the opinions of others.

Lead by Example: Be the role model for the behavior you expect from your team. Demonstrate the qualities of directness, honesty, and compassion in your own actions and decisions. Show respect and appreciation for your team members' contributions. By leading by example, you inspire others to follow suit and create a positive and productive work environment.

Links and Resources

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Instagram: @ShrinkThinkPodcast

Discover Counseling

Listen to the ShrinkThink Podcast

Sacred Space Community Groups - Starts in June

Show Notes and Audio Production by James Marland