Dork Knights
37 episodes - English - Latest episode: over 11 years ago - ★★★ - 2 ratingsHomepage Apple Podcasts Google Podcasts Overcast Castro Pocket Casts RSS feed
Episodes
Dork Knights #25 - Gotham Is Yours!
December 26, 2012 17:00 - 29.3 MBIn which The Dimwitted Duo once again give into their deepest Dark Knight related desires and mull over the prospect of the most unholy abomination imaginable - a Batman movie helmed by The Dork Knights themselves! From their discovery of being eachother's alternate personality to an unorthodox pitch involving sex, cameras, and shame, listen to the tale of a troubled production from it's beginning to it's end, featuring sassy black sidekicks, catering to the mentally challenged, a movie wit...
Dork Knights #24 - Let The Games Begin!
November 12, 2012 01:00 - 30.4 MBIn which The Dimwitted Duo force feed themselves a fistful of snow and jump out of a plane with shrapnel in their lungs, as they embark on yet another harrowing round of everyone's favorite fictional fistfight... Historical Fight Club! Who Will Win? Who Will Lose? Who Will Get An Exploding Bullet To The Face?! Tune in to find out!
Dork Knights #23 - You've Changed Things... Forever
November 04, 2012 00:55 - 35.1 MBIn which The Dimwitted Duo jump across the multiverse and take a look into alternate realities, where they consider everything from Batman as a sobbing idiot to Superman as an Amish pastor, the stretching of underused loins, the secret horrible purpose of the podcast, the terror of holiness, and the full circle of President Captain America. Iron Man has what kind of disorder?! THE BYRD WONDER... REBORN AS A MIME? THE DORK KNIGHT... CAN'T THINK OF A RHYME? WILL EITHER OF THEM MANAGE TO FI...
Dork Knights #22 - There's No Going Back
October 01, 2012 18:48 - 60.4 MBIn which The Dimwitted Duo return from a self-imposed exile of eight years to deliver something that wasn't worth the wait - a discussion of movie remakes! From the unlikeliest front door greeting one could imagine, to Teddy Roosevelt in a bear suit and the Presidential 80's cop movie, all the way down to rantings over the most infamous set of prequels in cinematic history, The Dork Knights ask themselves the all-important question: Why the hell aren't they in Hollywood? THE BYRD WONDER......
Dork Knights #21 - Look At Me!
September 03, 2012 01:16 - 32.9 MBIn which The Dimwitted Duo is back to buisness as usual. Except that it isn't, as the duo briefly becomes a trio! Bringing along a special guest, MB and Byrd are treated to something no one would have expected as they sit through a detailed review of a movie so shocking, and so vile, that it may or may not feature C-list comic book characters. From the most legitimately disturbing scene you'll ever hear described from a porno, and the creation of the bizarre continuity, to offense being tak...
Dork Knights #20 - I'm Just Ahead Of The Curve
August 19, 2012 20:31 - 41.8 MBIn which The Dimwitted Duo return! After taking a sabbatical following their harrowing month-long chat about all things Batman, The Dork Knights are back in action and just as moronic as ever. To celebrate the occasion, it's that time once again... for Historical Fight Club! Who Will Win? Who Will Lose? Whose Horse Will Get The Upper Hand?! Tune in to find out!
BATMONTH Finale - The Hero Gotham Deserves
July 23, 2012 05:29 - 56.1 MBWARNING: Major Spoilers For The Dark Knight Rises Are Discussed At Length The Legend Ends. The legend of Batmonth, at least, because The Dork Knights are ready to say goodbye with the seventh and final chapter of the series' installments detailing their own personal history with The Batman! And how do they decide to top off their chronicling of a history spanning over seventy years? With a review of The Dark Knight's latest theatrical outing, and the long-awaited end of Christopher Nolan's...
BATMONTH #6 - We Can Bring Gotham Back
July 19, 2012 01:46 - 54.6 MBAre you ready to begin? If not, too bad! The Dork Knights have reached the penultimate chapter of Batmonth, having withstood the trials of the 40's serials, made peace with the 60's series, relived a nostalgic classic in the form of the Burton films, and even suffered through the lowest points of the Schumacher era. Now, they face their greatest challenge yet, as The Dimwitted Duo finally make it to the climatic first two installments of a soon-to-be trilogy: Christopher Nolan's first foray...
BATMONTH #5 - Gotham Isn't Beyond Saving
July 15, 2012 16:00 - 48 MBNormal lives, they've almost got 'em. But if they had them, they wouldn't be The Dork Knights! And this installment is a very special edition, beginning the home stretch to the climax of the series as they delve into the most thoroughly definitive portrayal of The Batman yet... in animated form, no less, courtesy of Bruce Timm, Paul Dini, and the many others that contributed to the classic staple of the small screen, Batman: The Animated Series. Listen in as The Dimwitted Duo spend entirely...
BATMONTH #4 - Sometimes Things Just Go Bad
July 11, 2012 16:00 - 42.9 MBRiddle me this, riddle me that... who's obsessed with the big, black bat?! The Dork Knights, of course, and they're ready to bite the big one and delve into the often-mocked, rarely accredited version of The Batman that many fans consider to be the most infamous portrayal: the Joel Schumacher era. But are Batman Forever and Batman & Robin truly as bad as they're made out to be? Are there merits to the films that some perhaps overlook, or is it all worth burying in a glorious flood of chaos?...
BATMONTH #3 - I'm Batman
July 08, 2012 16:00 - 60.5 MBThe signal has been lit, and The Dork Knights are there inform the citizens of Gotham that the city has earned a rest from crime. Dialing back to their own youths to recount the tale of Tim Burton's 1989 classic and it's sequel, The Dork Knights discover that this podcast needs an enema as they discuss what it means to be King of the Wicker People, Nicholson's turn as the world's first fully functioning homicidal artist, which kitten twitches her little tail, the 200th anniversary festival'...
BATMONTH #2 - You're Practice
July 04, 2012 16:00 - 43.3 MBIt's that time in Gotham City once again, as The Batman's adventures begin on the silver screen, reviewed and accounted for by The Dork Knights! Hear the tale of the often-overlooked initial live-action outings of The Caped Crusader through the 1940's serialized film craze, where the only supervillains are racially insensitive stereotypes with shifty eyes, the Batmobile is a chevy, invisible klansmen roam the night, and the title character is the biggest racist of them all. But just wait, t...
BATMONTH #1 - But What Is Batman?
July 01, 2012 16:00 - 44.4 MBHoly heart failures! Starting this podcast, the amazing and unique adventures of The Batman, as told by The Dork Knights themselves! Discover both who they are and how they came to be, revealing some of their time as children growing up with a deep affection for The Caped Crusader while discussing many ongoing debates that have helped shaped the legend for over seventy years. Along the way in these coveted topics, startling revealations are revealed - like what would drive a four-year old b...
Dork Knights #19 - I Hate When People Talk During The Movie!
June 25, 2012 10:10 - 48.1 MBIn which The Dimwitted Duo get all cinematical up in this bitch, and discuss their favorite films. From favorite genres to favorite directors, with a few shocking - and some not so shocking - admissions through their collective thoughts on the medium, the antics start whenever the two just barely manage to properly begin, make it clear that nobody wants to be Roeper, discover the real reasoning behind the plot of The Terminator, note a politically incorrect movie as one of their all-time fa...
Dork Knights #18 - So Many People To Kill, So Little Time
June 18, 2012 00:54 - 47.5 MBIn which The Dimwitted Duo presents the next exciting round of Historical Fight Club... Who will win? Who will lose? Who will use the other as a human shield?! Tune in to find out!
DK-TV: "Or Should I Say... Terminated?" (Part 1)
June 15, 2012 05:23Starting today, all of your favorite episodes of Dork Knights will now alternatively be available in handy, segmented video form!
Dork Knights #17 - This Is Why Superman Works Alone
June 10, 2012 16:00 - 71.4 MBIn which the Dimwitted Duo let their geek flag fly and become men of steel in this extra-length episode, as they set out to determine which five comic book heroes are their respective favorites. Along the way, they discover a potential gem in an unlikely pitch for a new series, authorize lethal force against sneezing, examine what it would take to send Superman on a murderous rampage, what they don't like about dick, and end on some good ole' fashioned sexism. Come get a side helping of jus...
Dork Knights #16 - Monkey Work!
June 02, 2012 16:00 - 39.4 MBIn which The Dimwitted Duo give time updates on the hour, as they venture into territory unknown: early morning madness! Listen to the bouts of insanity that are the pair's first experiences with roleplaying - and no, not the sexual kind - as they recount tripping balls as 12 year-olds, calling upon creepy Robin tangents, brief considerations of LARPing and the scourge of The Black Knight, the most unlikely Star Wars character ever invented, what constitutes as a furry, and the creation of ...
INSIDE THE PLAYER'S STUDIO #4: Andy C.
May 30, 2012 16:00 - 46.1 MBIn the latest installment, The Bogus Byrd Man sets his sights on the Hype's very own master of the overplanning, Andy C.! Listen in as the man-who-would-be Spidey revisits some of his famous - aswell as some infamous - thoughts and rambles regarding his six-year tenure in the Hype RPG games, from his ongoing grievances with Superman detractors, to the loss of a game gone too soon, and even his legendary bout of multiversal wackiness, spending nearly two seasons pitting The Man of Steel agai...
Dork Knights #15 - I'll Get Drive-Thru
May 14, 2012 16:00 - 23.9 MBIn which the Dimwitted Duo set out to eat their own feet while pondering the ethics of ass-to-mouth, what'd be the primary dish at a Ku Klux Klan bake sale, the rudeness of methhead sharks, the taste of different races, a bizarre secret origin of a popular comic book villain, trying to conceal absurdly huge penises, and favorite moviegoing experiences. Try the whities! THE DORK KNIGHT... NORMALIZED? THE BYRD WONDER... CANNIBALIZED? HAS THE MADNESS REACHED IT'S FEVER PITCH?! Tune in to f...
Dork Knights #14 - I Like This Game!
April 29, 2012 16:30 - 42.2 MBIn which The Dimwitted Duo take on yet another vicious round of Historical Fight Club! Who will fight to the death? Who will win the battle for supremacy? Who will end up taking a dump on the other's grave? You'll just have to find out for yourself, as our heroes get burned at the stake to explore two infamous cultural figures - from an Englishman whose ancestors remain ever redundant, to the president who was voted "Most Likely To Kill Some Japs", haberdashery for dogs, proof that all Sout...
Dork Knights #13 - Or Should I Say... Terminated?
April 29, 2012 16:00 - 45.1 MBIn which The Dimwitted Duo get crank-called by the Governor and suffer being put to death for multiple electrocutions, as one podcaster tells a long-awaited tale of the afternoon that he witnessed a man be put to death by the state of Georgia. Listen to the two try to make light of a truly serious subject, as they discuss the mystery of the prison waiting room, alligators at the gate, inappropriate last requests, the struggles of real-life Transformers, Knights of Whiteness, the founding of...
Dork Knights #12 - ...Riddle Me That
April 08, 2012 17:14 - 62.3 MBIn which the Dimwitted Duo enter the rematch of a century in this special epic-length episode, as they look to settle old scores - ones that are relatively one week old. Listen in awe and wonderment as the Dork Knight and the Byrd Wonder clash for a second time in battle of trivial supremacy, stumbling through every step of the way and further proving their own ineptitude in mental prowess! Ladies and gentlemen, Dorkfall has begun. Hide your women, children, and local minorities. THE BYRD...
Dork Knights #11 - Riddle Me This...
April 01, 2012 16:00 - 21 MBIn which The Dimwitted Duo embark on a test of wits that will surely end horribly - deciding to prove how dimwitted they truly are with a trivia quiz! Listen as The Dork Knight unwittingly plays right into The Byrd Wonder's hands, only to turn the tables and up the stakes to a magnitude unseen! Plus, following the shenanigans, hear the struggles to keep the show afloat that somehow involve the first Prime Minister of America, Alex Trebek's missing facial hair, and continuous, vengeful bouts...
Dork Knights #10 - You're Overpaid, Hit The Road!
March 26, 2012 02:13 - 27.7 MBIn which The Dimwitted Duo make their glorious return, in a jam-packed episode that is sure to be infamous in both it's levels of depravity and horrifying scenarios. Embarking on a tour de force, The Dork Knight and The Byrd Wonder ask themselves what the world would be like if they worked together - and the results are just as ridiculous as the next. From the creation of The McByrd and snapping the neck of a giraffe, to the most unlikely basketball play in history and the use of ice skates...
INSIDE THE PLAYER'S STUDIO #3: Keyser Soze
March 14, 2012 16:00 - 39.2 MBIn the latest installment, The Bogus Byrd Man interviews Glasglow's most infamous serial killer-turned-professional comics writer Keyser Soze, a.k.a. The Off-Panel Podcast's very own John Lees, about his time in the RPG Forums playing every psychopathic supervillain under the sun. From his most darkly humorous hour as The Clown Prince of Crime, to a failed viral marketing attempt that was nearly mistaken for the next 9/11, listen to Soze relive the many moments in the RPGs that helped pave ...
Dork Knights #9 - He Didn't Even Lose A Limb!
March 09, 2012 20:06 - 27.4 MBIn which the Dimwitted Duo once again ponder what it would take to win in a battle of two historical figures, forgoing the approach of evil vs. evil and instead matching up crazy vs. crazy, pairing might with right and awesome against awesomeness. It's a duel to the death, and The Dork Knights are making it a recurring theme! Whoever wins, we lose. Bully! THE BYRD WONDER... LEFT FOR DEAD? THE DORK KNIGHT... GUNNING FOR HEADS? IS THIS THE BITTER END FOR OUR HEROES? Tune in to find out!
Dork Knights #8 - I Saw Her First. Gotta Fly!
March 02, 2012 16:00 - 32.1 MBIn which the Dimwitted Duo momentarily become a trio, as the Dork Knight and Byrd Wonder are graced with the prescence by a member of the opposite sex to discuss a bit of everything. From fake fakin' it with a pillow and the threat that multiple chins present, to the harrowing tale of one podcaster's visit to the local courthouse and a chance encounter with a judge who doesn't want you to make him angry. You wouldn't like him when he's angry. Plus, in a stunning turn of events, all three of...
Dork Knights #7 - Rats With Wings, Do Your Thing!
February 25, 2012 04:05 - 38.8 MBIn which the Dimwitted Duo take the time to get serious and start to talk shop. Comic shop, that is, as they commit mass genocide against Sky City, challenge the unknown, prepare to face the court, and terrorize the open roadways while wearing sheets. Plus, the debut of a brand new theme by the same fancy gentleman who brought you the opening of DK's sister podcast, Pulp Nightmare! THE DORK KNIGHT... IRREDEEMABLE? THE BYRD WONDER... INCORRUPTIBLE? TO WHAT DEPTHS OF MADNESS HAVE OUR HEROE...
INSIDE THE PLAYER'S STUDIO #2: Byrd Man
February 23, 2012 14:51 - 34.8 MBIn the latest installment, The Bogus Byrd Man turns the microphone on himself as he's interviewed by his partner-in-crime about a highly touted (and sometimes controversial) writing career of his own making that has spanned the better part of the last six years. Gaze into the abyss and watch as it stares back, as we cover everything from a depraved, pedophilic take on The Riddler to the exploits of The A-Team, James Bond, and the cast of Chuck... in the same storyline! Listen here! Referenc...
Dork Knights #6 - It's Supposed To Be Cold!
February 11, 2012 20:01 - 41 MBIn which the Dimwitted Duo cross paths with the rich and famous while cementing their status as obsessive eaters, talk shop and dissect the element of the Superbowl rarely given enough due, discuss the impact of the Neilson, and routinely discover that talking about food isn't nearly as exciting as it sounds. THE BOGUS WONDER... RENDERED STUPEFIED? THE DORK KNIGHT... RENDERED TERRIFIED? HAVE OUR HEROES GAZED UPON THEIR ULTIMATE PERIL? Tune in to find out!
INSIDE THE PLAYER'S STUDIO #1: Master Bruce
February 08, 2012 21:25 - 35.9 MBIn this first installment of a new Dork Knights subseries, become acquainted with a community you might not be familiar with as they relive tales of their own roleplaying misadventures of yesteryear. Hosted by DK's Byrd Man, this series explores what it's like when the nerds stop speaking through superheroes and fantasy fiction and start bringing themselves to the forefront. This is Inside The Player's Studio. In the first installment, The Bogus Byrd Man interviews his partner-in-crime for a...
Dork Knights #5 - And I Say... You're Full Of S**t
February 06, 2012 03:34 - 37.4 MBListen Here! In which the Dimwitted Duo discover new pleasures and rediscover old ones, as they discuss what gets them going the most - be it newly discovered television shows, time travelling hijinks, and even a brand new and completely horrifying interpretation of what happened the night that the 16th President of the United States was assassinated. You'll probably laugh at us, not with us. But either way, you'll laugh. Whether you want it or not. THE BYRD WONDER... CAPTURED IN A WEB OF H...
Dork Knights #4 - They Say He Drinks Blood...
January 21, 2012 10:19 - 25.8 MBListen Here! In which the Dimwitted Duo break out their history books and declare war of the facial hair, as they discuss who would win in a fight between two infamous dictators who ruled with an iron fist, aswell discover the unlikeliest of origins in such tyranny, what happens when you try to start an 'Occupy Hell' movement, and just how Marvel's leading anti-hero comes to grips with the simplest of concepts: headgear. Be sure to whore yourself out on this episode. THE DORK KNIGHT... ENC...
Dork Knights #3 - They Say He Can't Be Killed...
January 08, 2012 05:09 - 40.5 MBListen Here! In which the Dimwitted Duo return with an extra long episode - following an unnoticed absence - to tell the tales of one podcaster's unHellish week offline, before delving into an incredibly long and incredibly dry conversation about the merits of the idiot box over the big screen, try to define escapism for those with the mental capabilities of gerbils, spend far too much time setting up a final bit, and finally discuss what it's like being the Witness on the block during the h...
Dork Knights #2 - Because I Bought It In Japan
December 31, 2011 02:12 - 25.7 MBListen Here! In which The Dimwitted Duo try and fail to keep the topic off of comics, as brief origins of the podcast are discussed at a brisk pace before diving into the pitfalls of internet expectations, comic books with questionable mythos, a discussion about the most unlikely of disguises, and finish off with the first of many terrible podcast games to grace the DK archives. Stay clear of getting podcast aids from this episode. THE BYRD WONDER... INCONCEIVABLE? THE DORK KNIGHT... INCONS...
Dork Knights #1 - You Can Quote Me On That
December 17, 2011 04:36 - 22.4 MBListen Here! In which a bold new initiative is made in the way of internet broadcasting - two dudes talking to eachother about geeky crap! Wait, what? No, it's the first episode of the Dork Knights podcast! Witness the harrowing and slightly boring back-and-forth of two friends who couldn't be more alike and more different at the same time, as they engage in tales of debauchery so foul that you may leave offended. And that's our guarantee. WILL THE DIMWITTED DUO ESCAPE THE CLUTCHES OF DRY W...