Cinephobe
322 episodes - English - Latest episode: 20 days ago - ★★★★★ - 6.5K ratingsWelcome to Cinephobe: The Podcast where Zach Harper, Amin Elhassan and Anthony Mayes review movies that are poorly rated on Rotten Tomatoes, and try to ascertain whether or not those movies are accurately poorly rated, or maybe just didn’t get a fair shake. Cinephobe! Wherever you get Podcasts!
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Episodes
Cinephobe LIVE on Freedumb (with Method Man, Adam McKay and Neal Brennan)
June 09, 2021 00:33 - 2 hoursZach and Amin's segment from last weekend's LeBatard Show 24 hour live stream marathon. First they interviewed Method Man about How High and more, then Adam McKay and Neal Brennan chatted about politics and comedy, while occasionally discussing the 2009 film The Goods: Live Hard, Sell Hard with the guys. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 85.5: Daredevil Appeal (with Erin Darling)
June 04, 2021 09:00 - 55 minutesZach, Amin and Mayes are joined by comedian Erin Darling Torralva to discuss blind dating (dating actual blind people), comic con culture, romantic rooftops and orphans to see if Justice really is Blind after all. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 85: Daredevil
June 02, 2021 09:00 - 1 hourZach, Amin and Mayes are the finest blind podcasters in Hell's Kitchen. They'll tangle with an accurate irishman employed by a burly businessman and find love on a see saw along the way. Also there's a whole director's cut featuring Coolio! Justice is blind, but it can be heard. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 84.5: More Reindeer Games (with Valerie Le Batard)
May 28, 2021 09:00 - 1 hourZach, Amin and Mayes are joined once again by the Draft Queen Valerie Le Batard to play darts and work out our glamour muscles while planning the greatest Christmas heist in movie history. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 84: Reindeer Games
May 26, 2021 09:00 - 1 hourZach, Amin and Mayes are fresh out of the joint and headed straight to a casino for the heist of the holiday season. Grab your goddamn hot chocolate and some pecan fuckin pie, raid the mini bar, order some pay per views and listen to the only podcast that has both Coke AND Pepsi. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 83: Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice
May 19, 2021 09:00 - 2 hoursZach, Amin and Mayes continue to search for the kryptonite that will weaken this podcast enough to kill it. This foray into the Snyderverse may well be our Doomsday, so grab your mason jar of granny's peach tea, jump in the bath fully clothed, and settle in for the ultimate edition of this podcast. Am I too soon? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 82: Armageddon
May 12, 2021 09:00 - 1 hourZach, Amin and Mayes are deep core podcasters charged with blowing up an asteroid the size of Texas before it destroys the Earth. They'll have to overcome an unhinged Russian cosmonaut, Space Dementia, a sentient growling asteroid, Explosition and Ben Affleck to complete their mission before the countdown clock runs out. Baysplode! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 81: Smokin' Aces
May 05, 2021 09:00 - 1 hourZach, Amin and Mayes are podcast assassins after Jeremy Piven's heart for the punchline of $1 million. It's a death race to the penthouse of a Lake Tahoe hotel, where coke addicted magician Buddy 'Aces' Israel is waiting to get smoked. Will anyone make it out of the elevator alive? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 80.5: Disclosure Addendum (with Valerie Le Batard)
April 30, 2021 09:00 - 51 minutesZach, Amin and Mayes are joined by the Draft Queen Valerie Le Batard on her birthday to review the exhibits and pass final judgment on the landmark sexual harassment case between Michael Douglas and Demi Moore. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 80: Disclosure
April 28, 2021 09:00 - 1 hourZach, Amin and Mayes were expecting a promotion in the wake of an impending merger, but are passed over for an old flame looking to rekindle their explosive relationship. Will they resist temptation and remain faithful, or succumb to their patriarchal urges and exercise their dominance, destroying their families in the process? We can't disclose the outcome, listen to this podcast recorded on a random answering machine to find out. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 79.5: Mortal Kombat Annihilation (with Mike Ryan)
April 23, 2021 20:53 - 1 hourZach, Amin and Mayes strike back just in time for the release of the new Mortal Kombat reboot, bringing in Mike Ryan, Executive Producer of The LeBatard Show with Stugotz to unlock fatalities. Half the actors are different, the special effects are more like conventional effects, the costumes come from the bargain bin and it's only a ninety minute movie, but somehow we spent over two hours breaking it down. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 79: Hook
April 21, 2021 09:00 - 2 hoursZach, Amin and Mayes sprinkle themselves with pixie dust for the flight back to Neverland, where the food is imaginary but the stakes have never been higher. Captain Hook is having an identity crisis, Peter Pan is an absentee father, Tinkerbell has been harboring obsessive feelings for nearly a century and Rufio is the first emo kid ever. This podcast can fly, fight and crow. Bangarang! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 78: Envy
April 14, 2021 09:00 - 1 hourZach, Amin and Mayes are back with a revolutionary new invention: Va-Pod-Rize, the podcast that makes all other podcasts disappear. Whether you dream of running for the little congress, finishing every meal with delicious flan, or building the white house in your cul de sac, c'est la vie, as the Romans say. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 77: Anaconda
April 07, 2021 09:00 - 1 hourZach, Amin and Mayes are failed Paraguayan priests who have found a new calling: podcasting about snakes. In their quest to find the lost Shirishama tribe along the Amazon river, they must survive poisonousss waspsss, urethral catfish, jungle horniness and gigantic spring loaded anacondas. Five Whiskeys? That's breakfast on the river. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 76: Hercules in New York
March 31, 2021 09:00 - 1 hourZach, Amin and Mayes are running barefoot through Times Square to catch your chariot and deliver this podcast. Hercules leaves Mount Olympus for Spring Break and hits the town with the help of a humble pretzel salesman. We close out Arnold month with Arnold's first movie ever to show just how far his accent has come, and boy is Arnold a comer. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 75: Batman & Robin - Part 2
March 24, 2021 09:00 - 1 hourZach, Amin and Mayes return to Gotham City to find out if the Iceman really cometh after all. Will Poison Ivy push the Green New Deal through congress? Can Batgirl crack Alfred's three letter password? Is Bane capable of stringing a sentence together? What song sent Amin down a youtube rabbit hole? The answers to all those questions and more in the thrilling conclusion to this two parter. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 75: Batman & Robin - Part 1
March 17, 2021 09:00 - 1 hourZach, Amin and Mayes are rubbing ice cubes on their bat nipples to prepare for the onslaught of ice puns unleashed by Arnold as Dr. Victor Fries terrorizes Gotham. This movie put the Batman Franchise into cryogenic sleep for 8 years until Christopher Nolan found the cure for Schumacher Syndrome. Assemble your own Un-United Nations and hit Bane's turbo button, you've only got eleven minutes to thaw this podcast and listen before it's frozen forever. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit mega...
Cinephobe Ep 74: Eraser (with JuJu Gotti)
March 10, 2021 10:00 - 1 hourZach, Amin, Mayes and special guest JuJu Gotti usually work alone, but they've burned their credit cards and random baby photos in order to record this episode incognito. Arnold month continues with this movie overflowing with outrageous stunts, James Caan's smugness, light speed bullets and voracious luggage. Hurry up and listen to this podcast before it gets Erased. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 73: Twins
March 03, 2021 10:00 - 1 hourZach, Amin and Mayes discover they were created by a top secret experiment designed to produce physically, spiritually, and mentally advanced podcasters. Once united, they complement each other perfectly and take a road trip to Texas, while losing their virginity, buying matching suits and stalking their long lost mother along the way. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 72: Action Jackson
February 24, 2021 10:00 - 1 hourZach, Amin and Mayes are back in the eighties with Detroit's favorite son, Jericho "Action" Jackson, a former track star with a Harvard Law Degree, and boy does he live up to his name in this one. This movie has everything: Banter, sleazy bad guys doing kung fu, naked pop stars on heroin, ninja assassins, ridiculous explosions and auto union conspiracy. This is a Cinephobe you don't want to miss. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 71: How High
February 17, 2021 10:00 - 1 hourZach, Amin and Mayes are back at Harvard after acing their THCs thanks to help of the Ghost of Exposition present. They'll tangle with uptight Dean Cain, dirty mack on Bart Dooster's girl and bring hookers to the dorms, all while putting the finishing touches on a botany project that will benefit mankind. Now go warm me up some Pork Chops O’Chunky. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 70: Soul Man
February 10, 2021 10:00 - 1 hourBlack History Month continues on Cinephobe as Zach, Amin and Mayes take their cutting edge tanning pills and head to Harvard Law School on the Henry Q Bouchard scholarship to learn that it's not so easy being black after all. You can really feel 400 years of oppression in every single frame of this movie. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 69: Money Talks (with Josiah Johnson)
February 03, 2021 10:00 - 1 hourCinephobe kicks off Black History Month with this archival footage of Chris Tucker in his prime. Josiah Johnson the meme king joins Zach, Amin and Mayes to sing Vic Damone's greatest hits, kick it with Sammy Davis Jr. Jr. , and disguise Barry White lyrics as wedding toasts. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 68: Gone in 60 Seconds (with Nando Vila)
January 27, 2021 10:00 - 1 hourZach, Amin and Mayes come out of retirement to assemble the crew for one last job, bringing in Woke Bro Nando Vila to help steal 50 cars in one night. Cage month comes to a close in this car caper released just ahead of The Fast and the Furious in the year 2000. Can Nic save his brother from a vindictive carpenter? Can Amin finish a movie longer than 90 minutes? You'll have to listen to find out. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 67: Kiss of Death
January 20, 2021 10:00 - 1 hourGrab your inhaler and head down to Babycakes strip club as Nic Cage month continues here on Cinephobe. What doesn't kill Zach, Amin and Mayes makes them stronger, they'll live free or die, and if you fuck with the bull you get the horns, so put on your poncho and blast that House of Pain CD, it's time to clean up your own backyard. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 66: Snake Eyes
January 13, 2021 10:00 - 1 hourZach, Amin and Mayes were made for this sewer and they are the kings. Cage Month rolls along with this 1998 thriller about conspiracy, a blind goody two shoes, political assassination, a married man and heavyweight boxing. Put your gold flip phone on silent and believe everything except your ears, because listening is deceiving. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 65: Jiu Jitsu (with Pablo Torre)
January 06, 2021 10:00 - 1 hourZach, Amin and Mayes are joined by Pablo Torre to square off one at a time with the ancient alien Brax, who has so much respect for the art of Jiu Jitsu that he never even dares to use it. Put on your paper hat and spit roast your finest fish, it's time to kick off Nicolas Cage month in style. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 64: Troll 2
December 30, 2020 10:00 - 1 hourZach, Amin and Mayes close out the year by swapping houses with hospitable Utah peasants in the town of Nilbog. They'd rather be drinking Mountain Dew with their boys at the RV bordello, but all they've got is room temperature Nilbog milk. Be on the lookout for unattached girls, but whatever you do, don't eat the food. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 63: Money Plane
December 23, 2020 10:00 - 1 hourYou wanna listen to three podcasters on the verge of pissing themselves discuss a movie held together by terrible exposition and scotch tape? Money Plane. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 62: Money Train - Part 2 (with Roy Bellamy)
December 16, 2020 10:00 - 59 minutesZach, Amin, Mayes and Roy are back on the Money Train to tangle ass with the transit twins, punch J Lo in the face and then bang her, get pick pocketed by an old lady and start a fire by striking gasoline with a metal pipe. We bled the breaks so this podcast won't stop until it reaches the end of the line. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 62: Money Train - Part 1 (with Roy Bellamy)
December 09, 2020 10:00 - 1 hourZach, Amin, Mayes and special guest Roy Bellamy board the Money Train and travel back to a simpler time, when the NY MTA was raking in millions of dollars of cold hard cash a day. It doesn't matter if there are people on the tracks, this train doesn't stop for anything! Give us some money so we can buy you a Christmas present, we definitely won't blow it immediately in a card game. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 61: Last Action Hero
December 02, 2020 10:00 - 1 hourZach, Amin and Mayes have obtained possession of Harry Houdini's magical golden ticket and use it to enjoy all of the glorious fruits this movie has to offer: Product placement, over the top explosions, shouting lieutenants, monologuing villains and freshmen named Skeezy. Where does the parody end and the movie begin? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 60: The Fan
November 25, 2020 10:00 - 1 hourZach, Amin and Mayes coulda made it to the bigs if only they had mastered the sacrifice fly (the most beautiful play in the game). Just like unemployed knife salesman Gil Renard, they want some respect, and they'll leave their own kids behind at opening day and follow you into a sauna if that's what it takes to get it. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 59: Drillbit Taylor
November 18, 2020 10:00 - 1 hourZach, Amin and Mayes are being relentlessly bullied (by each other), so they've posted an ad in search of a bodyguard. A homeless Owen Wilson comes to the rescue (wow!) to teach a trio of nerds self defense, steal their shit and bang their teacher. Just don't touch the dumpster at Ocean and Wilshire, that's his. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 58: CATS
November 11, 2020 10:00 - 1 hourWelcome to Cinephobe! The jellicle podcast for jellicle podcats you should definitely be afraid to admit you love. Whether you're a washed up glamour cat like Grizabella, or a dissatisfied curious cat like Rum Tum Tugger, join us in a choreographed dance under the jellicle moon and see if you reach the Heavyside Layer. Jellicle. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 57: That's My Boy
November 05, 2020 10:00 - 1 hourZach, Amin and Mayes are reunited with their estranged father just in time for a beautiful waterfront wedding as the Sandler wars rage on. Help yourself to the strip club omelette bar and pull a Bud Heavy out of your loose sock, because Champale is up next and her vagina counts as double. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 56: Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo
October 28, 2020 10:00 - 1 hourNews Headline! Cinephobe's finest prosti-dudes are Amsterdam bound for an all you can eat buffet of Portugese Breakfasts and Turkish Snow Cones. Zach, Amin and Mayes had to get 5 different colored tulips, eat two herring and drink a beer from a wooden shoe before they could record this podcast. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 55: Johnny Be Good
October 21, 2020 06:00 - 1 hourFresh off a dominant performance in the championship game, Zach, Amin and Mayes find themselves subsumed by recruiters who all want a piece of the latest Cinephobe. Whether playing 3 on 3 football against the cops, or flirting with a young Uma Thurman, one thing's for sure: Johnny Got Game. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 54: Grown Ups 2
October 14, 2020 06:00 - 1 hourThe Rental Wars wage on as Zach, Amin and Mayes dress up like their favorite 80s character and groove to the J Geils Band (sans J Geils). Bring your survival fanny pack and avoid the frat boys because it's getting rough out here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 53: R.I.P.D.
October 07, 2020 06:00 - 1 hourZach, Amin and Mayes are frosty and huntin for Deados in this afterlife romp that takes place over the course of 3 or 4 days. Whether your carcass was picked apart by coyotes, or you're trying to reconnect with your French wife while disguised as James Hong, snort a bump of cumin and buckle up. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 52: The Lawnmower Man Part 2
September 30, 2020 08:00 - 49 minutesZach, Amin and Mayes' minds are like clean, hungry sponges as they strap into the Gyrosphere and overdose on nootropic drugs before projecting this podcast into the mainframe and becoming Cyber Christs. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 52: The Lawnmower Man Part 1
September 23, 2020 08:00 - 1 hourZach, Amin and Mayes aren't into reality reality, they're into virtual reality with this 1992 film that's not legally allowed to connect itself to the Stephen King short story. Fill up your gas can and crank up the sexual tension for another epic 2-part Cinephobe spectacular. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 51: Mom and Dad
September 22, 2020 20:31 - 1 hourZach, Amin and Mayes are back in the Cage for this nuanced action horror dark comedy that uses its conceit to peel back the layers of being a washed parent in modern society. Whether you get your news from a portable dvd player or prefer concentrated ethological exposition from Dr Oz while you hit the bong, this is the movie for you. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 50: The Break-Up
September 09, 2020 12:00 - 1 hourBreaking up is hard to do, just ask the recently rekindled Cinephobe crew. Zach Harper, Amin Elhassan and Anthony Mayes are a couple of podcasters that don't have a goddamn future, and they're taking over by air, land and sea. Just promise us you're not gonna do anything. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 49: Wet Hot American Summer
September 05, 2020 12:00 - 1 hourAfter Amin's dramatic exit from the show, Zach and Mayes pack their bags for the 2001 summer camp comedy cult classic that features horny summer love, lots of unlikely therapy, and all the other quintessential experiences Camp Firewood has to offer. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 48: After Earth
August 27, 2020 02:16 - 1 hourZach, Amin and Mayes return to the quarantine zone for the 2013 sci-fi thriller that teaches us important lessons about parenthood and the dangers of environmental exploitation. Make sure you've got your go pro backpack, cutlass and horrific futuristic accent secured for this 100 km podcast journey. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 47: Movie 43
August 19, 2020 12:00 - 1 hourZach, Amin and Mayes scour the dark web to find the elusive, offensive "film" crudely assembled from various writers, directors and actors and sewn together like a sketch movie Frankenstein. Stop fingering your iBabe for a minute and listen. (Movies 1-42 are not prerequisite viewing for this podcast) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 46: Takers
August 12, 2020 12:00 - 1 hourZach, Amin and Mayes suit up and shoot the moon for this 2010 heist movie loaded with emotional baggage. You have to wait at least a year between jobs so the heat cools off, but you don't have to wait more than a week for another spectacular episode of Cinephobe. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 45: Catwoman
August 05, 2020 12:00 - 1 hourZach, Amin and Mayes take a trip to CGI city for the 2004 female empowerment saga that put Halle Berry in a leather body suit to find her true calling. Another one name director (Pitof), another Cinephobe classic. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Cinephobe Ep 44: A Million Ways to Die in the West
July 29, 2020 12:00 - 1 hourZach, Amin and Mayes take a trip to the moustachery in this 2014 comedy that everyone agrees isn't as good as Blazing Saddles (one of the foremost classic comedies of all time). This movie takes several pages out of Amin's dream journal and if you listen, we'll show you a real dollar bill for the first time in your life. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices