Tuesday 08.24.2021 - The Church of Lazlo Podcast

Yo!! How’s everyone doing? Good? Great! We’d like to introduce you to the newest member of the show, Mr Moneybags. *I don’t expect Americans to start putting on three-piece suits or formal dresses every time they leave the house but do we have to be the “Show Me Your B***H**E” country? *Doomscrolling!! Biden’s got a week to get people out of Afghanistan. China says COVID probably originated in the US. Why carry a vaccine passport when you could get a QR-Code tattoo? How do you incentivize prison inmates to get vaccinated? Florida man caught with his pants down. Something something tik tok, something something milk crates. It’s August and a thousand degrees outside which means we’re all craving Pumpkin Spiced Lattes. Congratulations, if you’re reading this, you’ve outlived one of the Rolling Stones. *Why are men so bad at everything? They can’t even grocery shop without a picture book and map. Or do men pretend to be bad at everything because they don’t want to be asked to do it again? If that’s the case, men should pretend to be bad at more stuff. *Twitter says movies like Fight Club and Joker are relationship red flags. Now they’ve come up with green flag movies. *What makes you undateable? What makes your perpetually single friend undateable? Bad tattoos? Hard on the eyes? Unemployed? Too picky? Know-it-all? Yes. *What do Jeriney and carnival mirror prizes have in common? Remember, the simplest answer is usually correct. *That's a wrap! Go home and get some sleep. Thanks for listening! We'll try to remember our energy powder tomorrow.  -Everybody Wang Chung!!!

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Yo!! How’s everyone doing? Good? Great! We’d like to introduce you to the newest member of the show, Mr Moneybags. *I don’t expect Americans to start putting on three-piece suits or formal dresses every time they leave the house but do we have to be the “Show Me Your B***H**E” country? *Doomscrolling!! Biden’s got a week to get people out of Afghanistan. China says COVID probably originated in the US. Why carry a vaccine passport when you could get a QR-Code tattoo? How do you incentivize prison inmates to get vaccinated? Florida man caught with his pants down. Something something tik tok, something something milk crates. It’s August and a thousand degrees outside which means we’re all craving Pumpkin Spiced Lattes. Congratulations, if you’re reading this, you’ve outlived one of the Rolling Stones. *Why are men so bad at everything? They can’t even grocery shop without a picture book and map. Or do men pretend to be bad at everything because they don’t want to be asked to do it again? If that’s the case, men should pretend to be bad at more stuff. *Twitter says movies like Fight Club and Joker are relationship red flags. Now they’ve come up with green flag movies. *What makes you undateable? What makes your perpetually single friend undateable? Bad tattoos? Hard on the eyes? Unemployed? Too picky? Know-it-all? Yes. *What do Jeriney and carnival mirror prizes have in common? Remember, the simplest answer is usually correct. *That's a wrap! Go home and get some sleep. Thanks for listening! We'll try to remember our energy powder tomorrow.  -Everybody Wang Chung!!!

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.