226: Dushka Zapata Do I Need A Soulmate?

How does creativity bloom and do we really need a soulmate? Dushka Zapata is a talented writer and a communications executive at Silicon Valley. Today, she joins us to talk about writing, soulmates, the difference between blame and responsibility, and a whole lot more.
“The greatest lie ever told is that there is someone out there that can make you peaceful, happy and full.” - Dushka Zapata

Three Things We Learned
Creativity blooms from unpredictability and solitude
Dushka thinks that her fast-paced workplace along with everything else that happens to her on the regular enable her writing. In truth, being in one’s comfort zone can be gray and may kill the stories that one has to write. Striking the perfect balance between unpredictability and solitude to allow oneself to breathe helps in maintaining creativity.
Boredom and distraction are not a dichotomy
The inability to feel pleasure or anhedonia stems from both boredom and perpetual distraction. But distraction does not mean the complete opposite of boredom, and oftentimes unhealthy distractions take on the form of false entertainment fed to the brain. Perpetual distraction may also lead to burnout, especially if boredom still lingers even after giving in to one distraction after another.
Finding one's soulmate will not fix you
Dushka actively answers questions on Quora and one of the many things that she has been asked is whether or not we need a soulmate. But this is just one of the many lies that we from every other person. We don't need to find someone to end our suffering from dissatisfaction and despair or being disheartened and lonely, as this belief oftentimes enhances a permanent sense of restlessness.

Humans are already whole and our secret sense of dissatisfaction and loneliness is actually inherent to the human condition. In fact, no one out there has the ability to bail you out. Eventually, you can pick out someone to walk beside you through everything, but the antidote to your loneliness does not exist in anyone outside of yourself but you.

Bio:

Dushka Zapata is a best-selling author and her work has been viewed over 120 million times on Quora. She serves as the VP of Communications at public technology company Zendesk.

Links:

Amazon

Quora

Twitter

LinkedIn

We hope you enjoyed Dushka Zapata on this episode of Legends and Losers! Christopher loves hearing from his listeners. Feel free to email him, connect on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and subscribe on iTunes!