Chat with Me, Ep. 007 | "6 Easy Ways to Say “No”

This episode will explore 6 healthy ways to set effective boundaries.

6 Easy Ways to Say “No”

Sometimes we have a hard time telling others “No.” Unfortunately, leaving it unsaid cancome at your own expense. You lose time to do the things you really want (or need) to doand you can even feel resentful towards the other person and yourself.

Telling others that you can’t acquiesce to their request doesn't have to be difficult. If youstruggle with the concept, here are some ideas you can put to use immediately.

1. Explain that your other commitments are taking up all your time right now.Everyone is too busy at times; the other person will understand that you have a heavyload of other responsibilities. It might help to go into a little detail about the other thingsyou have going on; it will increase their level of understanding.

2. Say that you're in the middle of something and that you'll get back to them. It's notuncommon to get hit with requests for immediate help. You can let them know that youcan’t help right now but that you might be able to help soon. If it really is urgent, they’llfind someone else and shouldn't feel resentful towards you.

3. Tell them that you'll think about it. This is more of a “maybe” than an absolute “no.”Avoid using this option if you really do want to say “no.” Take the time you need toconsider it and remember to get back to them. You can suggest your own deadline or analternative that works for better for you if you can’t comply fully with their first request.

4. If someone is trying to sell something to you, tell them that their offering doesn'tmeet your needs but you'll get back to them if your needs change. This puts an end tothe matter quickly without the other person feeling insulted. After all, you're rejectingtheir product or service; you're not rejecting them personally.

5. Tell them that so-and-so would be a better help. In this case, you're not refusing tohelp them. In fact, you are helping them by suggesting someone more capable ofsatisfying their needs.

6. Tell them that you'd like to help, but…. This lets the other party know that you wouldlike their offer or would like to provide assistance to them, but you that you are either toobusy or their offer doesn't meet your needs. It's similar to #1 and #4, but is moresupportive and encouraging.

If you'll learn to say “no” to the things that you really don't want to do, don't have the timeto do, or don't fit your needs, your life will be much richer for it.

Like many other things in life, it gets easier with practice. After you get used to it, you'll besurprised how easy it is and how receptive others can be.

Remember to only tell the truth. One of the options is bound to be true. There's no reason tofeel like you’re being dishonest. Now go tell some people “no” and see how much better youfeel!

Affirmation: Saying, “No,” is powerful. I will value my needs as I honor the needs of others. It is notmy responsibility to rescue others; and their individual responsibilities are not mine. I will show upto support, but I will not accept the problems of others as my own. I am not God, and I will notattempt to choose the lessons for them to learn.