Calling All Creeps: A Goosebumps Literary Review

Ep 26. My Hairiest Adventure

December 09, 2019 14:09 - 1 hour - 68.2 MB

I know RL Stine says that his books don't have lessons, but please don't apply prescription lotion you find in the trash to you and your friends' skin regardless of how funny the result may be. Welcome to Health Class. Dave and Matt are here to discuss how your body is changing and you are blossoming into a young adult. Now hit the showers and avoid eye contact.

Ep. 25 Attack of the Mutant

November 25, 2019 12:00 - 1 hour - 80.4 MB

Matt and Dave are joined by musician and horror comic enthusiast, Nick Sardone! The Masked Mutant is a comic villain that can turn his molecules into anything! (There are some repercussions from him turning into a liquid, but why would that info be important to the reader, the mutant himself, or the plot?) Our worthless protagonist's public transportation shortcomings and near endless comic book knowledge set off a plot that stops making sense around chapter 6. Good Luck.

Ep. 24 Phantom of the Auditorium

November 11, 2019 12:50 - 1 hour - 68.6 MB

Matt and Dave break a leg reading the Phantom of the Auditorium. You'd think this book would be about handsome roguish ghouls, but really it's about the danger of falling from high places. Seriously. Schools, check your trap doors. Kids can get hurt. How are you going to call a kid's parents and tell them they died in a tragic 'Shrek the Musical' accident? Didn't think of that, did you?

The Haunted Mask: Goosebumps Television Series

October 28, 2019 11:00 - 56 minutes - 51.4 MB

Happy Halloween you cute little Stine Heads! What better way to celebrate the best holiday than watching a spooky movie. Let Matt and Dave be your guide to the most iconic episode of the Goosebumps Television show! Show audio is included. You can listen to the episode alone or pair with the show muted on Netflix for the full experience.

Ep. 23 Return of the Mummy

October 14, 2019 12:00 - 1 hour - 70.5 MB

Matt and Dave journey back to the mystical deserts of Egypt to check back in with their favorite Uncle Ben, cousin Sari, and the poster child for fragile masculinity, Gabe. As the title implies, there are mummies. No surprises there. However, the big discoveries these podcasters uncover in the endless sands is a deeper adult understanding of coming-of-age characters and themes, budding sexuality, and that sometimes bugs are a possible replacement for your dead mom.

An Evening With RL Stine

September 30, 2019 13:00 - 1 hour - 70.3 MB

It's been a year of ghouls, ghosts, and sick sucking noises. Matt and Dave celebrate a year of podcasts the best way imaginable. The gruesome twosome sat in on a conversation between RL Stine and Tim Jacobus! You don't want to miss this one!

EP. 22 Ghost Beach

September 16, 2019 11:00 - 1 hour - 78.1 MB

Move over #HotGirlSummer, at Brad and Agata's beach-side cottage Jerry and Terri are living #DeadKidSummer. Matt and Dave hop on their boogie boards and catch a wave to the family graveyard in RL Stine's masterpiece Ghost Beach!

EP. 21 Go Eat Worms

September 03, 2019 11:00 - 1 hour - 69.5 MB

Matt & Dave celebrate the 21st book the way you celebrate a 21st birthday, by getting someone way too drunk. Learn why a borderline sexual fascination with worms and getting revenge on your older sister doesn't mix. Many worms were harmed in the making of this book, but it was all in the name of science. Get ready to be "H" for the "W"!

Ep. 20 The Scarecrow Walks at Midnight

August 19, 2019 11:00 - 1 hour - 71 MB

Jody and her brother Mark go on their yearly summer trip to visit their grandparents and eat pancakes. Turns out farmhand Stanley learned how to read and is bringing his straw scarecrow buddies to life so he can choose pie flavors. Moral of the story is don't get between tweens and their pancakes.

Ep. 19 Deep Trouble

August 05, 2019 14:48 - 1 hour - 92.1 MB

The ocean is a horrific nightmare of mystery, teeth, and mermaids? Did anybody remember that this book is about mermaids? Weird. Dave of the Age of Enfrightenment podcast joins Matt and Dave as they explore the deep with the Deeps and deepen their understanding of Australian accents. Gine...

Ep. 18 Monster Blood II

July 22, 2019 12:35 - 1 hour - 175 MB

Evan and Andy return in a new tale. While the setting may be new, you can bet your bottom dollar this puppy is going to be full of wet sucking sounds from that green gunk we love to hate. Monster Blood is back and it's coming to a hamster near you!

Ep. 17 Why I'm Afraid of Bees

July 08, 2019 12:00 - 1 hour - 141 MB

Matt and Dave have found new reasons to be afraid of bees in the weeks it has taken to finish this Goosebumps book. Welcome to their hell. BZZZZZZZZzzzzzzz...

Goosebumps Quarterly Review / Download & Die!

June 24, 2019 12:00 - 1 hour - 192 MB

Matt and Dave have completed a fourth of the original Goosebumps collection! The duo take this time to analyze and rate the opening titles of the series in their first Goosebumps Quarterly Review! Also, Goosebumps bright green heart is still pumping hard in todays pop culture and RL Stine's slimey creations have gooshed their way to the world of comics. Matt & Dave break down the spiritual successor to "Say Cheese and Die" with it's millennial counter-part "Download & Die!"

Ep. 16 One Day at Horrorland

June 10, 2019 16:22 - 1 hour - 222 MB

Ever feel like your summer is lacking that extra thrill? Just want to unplug and get your family murdered by a slide? How about getting your dad gored by a giant bird in a thunder dome? Do we have the park for you! By bringing one proof of purchase for a Coca-Cola product, Matt and Dave get free admissions for their long awaited guest, Brian, to the theme park that will literally kill you.

Ep. 15 You Can't Scare Me

May 28, 2019 14:17 - 1 hour - 157 MB

If this town was really looking for poop monsters, they just needed to check their local Middle School. Matt and Dave take a hard and loose approach to the weakest title thus far. Follow a terrible squad of trash children as they try to scare a little girl just for being a decent human-being. Seriously, these kids are just plain awful... Also, there are monsters.

Ep. 14 The Werewolf of Fever Swamp

May 13, 2019 13:08 - 1 hour - 193 MB

Mom and Dad love science more than their children. Would their be any other reason to leave the picturesque beauty of Vermont for a poop bog life in the swamp? If naming their son Grady wasn't abuse enough, they send their husky child off into the Florida everglades to play while they hang with their deer pals. Video Game/Comic writer Tom Dzuiba joins Matt and Dave on a swampy Cinco De Mayo to trudge deep into the story and return with some surprisingly coherent literary analysis!

Ep. 13 Piano Lessons Can Be Murder

April 29, 2019 14:49 - 1 hour - 177 MB

Haunted Piano? Ghosts? Robots? Severed Child Hands!? Is this thing on? Matt and Dave dig into the 13th Goosebumps title and like what they find. RLS has mastered the craft of children's horror and is ready to play chopsticks on your sickly melting skull head. Strap in and show me them hands, baby.

Ep. 12 Be Careful What You Wish For

April 15, 2019 11:00 - 1 hour - 188 MB

Matt and Dave return to the Goosebumps world and try so hard not to use the "G" word while describing a mystical, traveling, magic lady who grants wishes. Sam is a clumsy, puberty-bound klutz who is given the power to make three wishes. Unfortunately for her, this lady really sucks at magic.

Bailey School Drop Outs: Vampires Don't Wear Polka Dots

April 01, 2019 12:13 - 1 hour - 166 MB

Put your books away and take a seat, class. it's the first of April and you guys know what that means, ANOTHER NEW EPISODE OF BAILEY SCHOOL DROP OUTS! Just like they do every month, Ed, Matt and Dave go through the beloved and probably very relevant early 90's kids horror series Bailey School Kids. Pencil's Down Dudes!

Ep. 11 The Haunted Mask

March 18, 2019 11:00 - 1 hour - 228 MB

Get ready for an extra-long CAC special episode! It's RLS's favorite book and we imagine many of yours. Matt and Dave are joined by independent filmmaker and pop culture connoisseur Isaac Leggett. The boys dive in to the 'original Facebook' to shed light on 90's bullying, duck customs, and sweet, tender mom love. Don't miss it!

Ep. 10 The Ghost Next Door

March 04, 2019 12:00 - 1 hour - 162 MB

When a new boy moves in next door there has to be a pretty good chance that he's a ghost, right? I mean, sure, all of your friends have disappeared and he goes to your school but you don't know him or his friends but he has to be the ghost. Also, The Grim Reaper is chasing you. But he's the ghost.... God, you're so stupid.

Ep. 9 Welcome to Camp Nightmare

February 18, 2019 12:00 - 1 hour - 166 MB

Camping used to be called 'living' before we gave up our nomadic ways. For Billy and his boys, it's called 'dying'. Camp Nightmoon is a terrible camp which makes for a terrible plot. RLS crafts a beautiful outdoor experience and hangs it on a meatless plot full of dead children, guns, and snake bites. Don't miss this one!

Ep.8 The Girl Who Cried Monster

February 04, 2019 12:00 - 1 hour - 193 MB

Lucy is a monster-crazy tween and frankly her friends and family are sick of it. Seriously, this girl is relentless. Lucky for her, the summer reading program is lead by a peculiar librarian with monster-like tendencies! Join Matt and Dave and their first ever guest, Jackie, a real life children's librarian! It's like a scholastic book fair for your ears! Don't miss this one!

Ep.7 The Night of the Living Dummy

January 21, 2019 12:00 - 1 hour - 177 MB

It's finally here! The book you have all been waiting for! Two identical twin sister battle for dominance on the only battlefield worth fighting... Ventriloquism. Matt & Dave bring you The Night of the Living Dummy!

EP 6. Let's get Invisible

January 07, 2019 12:00 - 1 hour - 86 MB

Max and his brother Lefty stumble across a secret compartment in their home due to their friend Erin's attic fetish. They discover an old mirror and lightbulb that have the power to turn the kids invisible! That's about it. Seriously... I mean, there are shadow children near the end but they are just as unenthused. Matt and Dave recount the book's nonexistent plot and do some bad impressions.

Holiday Special: The 12 Screams of Christmas

December 24, 2018 12:00 - 1 hour - 96 MB

It's that special RL Time of the year, dear listener. Matt and Dave take a break from the original 62 Goosebumps books to give you a Stine Holiday classic from the 'Most Wanted' series. Chestnuts are roasting by the fire, little girls are drowning in wells, pre-teens are doing backflips... Sounds like Christmas to me!

EP 5. The Curse of the Mummy's Tomb

December 10, 2018 12:00 - 1 hour - 94.2 MB

The worst preteen in existence gets to visit his motherland and the pyramids over winter break. This kid is seriously the worst ever. We were rooting for the mummies, small pox, really anything to take this jerk out. When his parents are called away on business, he gets balls deep in a tomb with his uncle, cousin, the obvious bad guy, and a butt ton of mummies. Also, RL Stine calls every sarcophagus a "mummy case" which is kind of cute and endearing.

EP 4. Say Cheese And Die

November 26, 2018 12:00 - 1 hour - 95.1 MB

Way before Snapchat, there was only one camera that could ruin teen lives! Greg and his friends "find" a cursed camera while robbing a homeless man. It takes some pretty wacky photos that come true! Did I mention Ryan Gosling plays Greg in the show? Also, Matt invents a fun new game and Dave uncovers a real life murder connected to the episode. SMILE!

100% Definitely Real Interview With Ryan Gosling

November 22, 2018 18:21

Say Cheese and Die Episode is set to release on 11/26/18. So we wanted to deliver our awesome, not fake interview with the Goosebumps episode star Ryan Gosling!

EP 3. Monster Blood

November 12, 2018 12:00 - 1 hour - 116 MB

You like beef? Deaf Aunt Katherine sure does! Did she mention she's a witch? All of this is pretty unimportant when RL Stine decides to grow our upsetting, sexual vocabulary in this slime filled Goosebumps book! Matt and Dave guide you through the sensual, quivering, slime mess that is Monster Blood!

IT CAME FROM THE BOOERY!

October 31, 2018 14:15

Welcome to the Booery! A new segment where the boys dive in to a selection of seasonal beers, blind! Which brew will come out on top? Which will suffer a worse fate? Find out, on this Halloween beer special!

EP 2. Stay Out of the Basement

October 29, 2018 12:00 - 52 minutes - 72.2 MB

Dads need their personal space. Can't these kids leave their mad scientist pop to do his freakish botany in peace? Matt and Dave tackle the second book in the Goosebumps series; Stay Out of the Basement. Is this a story about a mutant plant dad or the strain a family can endure? Also, fart jokes!

EP 1. Welcome to Dead House

October 07, 2018 02:20 - 1 hour - 111 MB

Welcome to the inaugural episode of Calling All Creeps and this very Dead House. Matt and Dave dig into the first book in Goosebumps catalogue! Dogs run away, little brothers suck, and kids get super murdered!