219 – Who Are You, in your relationships?

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Who are you…In your relationships?
Today I’m going to talk a little bit about your individual role in the lives of people around you.  Who exactly are you to these people?  I’m always saying that our relationships are the most valuable things we possess, and today I’m going to get a little deeper into that topic.  Before I do that though, I’m going to take a minute and mention the sponsor of today’s episode; StumpTown Kilts.
Right now we are entering premier kilt wearing weather, summer is upon us and there will be barbecues, and parties and get-togethers.  There are fairs and carnivals and parades coming up.  There will be family reunions and weddings, camp outs and fishing trips.  Summer is the time all of these things happen with great frequency, and each one of these events are the perfect time to show up wearing your beautiful and extremely manly, StumpTown Kilt.
If you want to make a statement of confidence without uttering a word.  If you would like to be noticed without doing anything special and be comfortable doing it—just show up in your kilt.  Each StumpTown Kilt is expertly crafted out of the best materials with you in mind.  The come in a wide range of colors and there is a selection of accessories you can get as well.  As a listener of this show you can get a substantial discount by going to there website at:  http://stumptownkilts.com (stumptownkilts.com)  then as you are checking out, enter the code:  betterman, all lower case, all one word, and you will receive 10% off your entire purchase.  Summer is here, so don’t wait, head over to http://stumptownkilts.com (stumptownkilts.com) today.
Ok, so each one of us have relationships with other people.  We are sons and brothers, fathers, husbands, boyfriends and co-workers.  We are friends, uncles, nephews, and neighbors, and we are customers, employee’s and supervisors.  Every time you interact with another human some degree of relationship is established.  It may be very slight in passing, or it may be profound and deep, but all of these interactions together make up the entire spectrum of your relationships.
All of these relationships from the seemingly insignificant to the profound are important.  They are, as I have said many times, the most valuable things you possess.  The quality of your life, the level of happiness, joy and prosperity you experience on earth is a direct reflection of the quality of your relationships.
It’s just how we were designed as humans.  We are pack animals, we were never intended to be solitary.  This has been proven throughout history because people who have tried to exist alone without a tribe around them inevitably go crazy, and ultimately die.
As a man you have a role in each of these relationships.  You have an obligation to fulfill that role.  Whenever you successfully fulfill your relationship duties you are elevated as a man, along with the quality of that relationship.  How you carry out the function of relationship is a direct reflection on exactly what kind of man you are.
If you become confused about what your role in a relationship should be try putting yourself in the others persons shoes.  Ask yourself the questions; Who am I to this person?  Who should I be to this person?  You will find that there is almost always room for improvement, there is always something you can do to improve any relationship if we are focused on doing that.
For example;  Who are you to your friends?  Are you someone they trust and respect?  Someone they look up to and confide in?  Are you a leader or a follower? 
Knowing yourself is one thing, but knowing who you are to others is something else.  Are you anyone’s hero?  Are you a mentor, do you make other people laugh, do you make them feel safe?  Knowing how you are perceived by others is an extremely valuable tool when it comes to improving yourself.  It provides an extra layer of objectivity that

Who are you…In your relationships?
Today I’m going to talk a little bit about your individual role in the lives of people around you.  Who exactly are you to these people?  I’m always saying that our relationships are the most valuable things we possess, and today I’m going to get a little deeper into that topic.  Before I do that though, I’m going to take a minute and mention the sponsor of today’s episode; StumpTown Kilts.
Right now we are entering premier kilt wearing weather, summer is upon us and there will be barbecues, and parties and get-togethers.  There are fairs and carnivals and parades coming up.  There will be family reunions and weddings, camp outs and fishing trips.  Summer is the time all of these things happen with great frequency, and each one of these events are the perfect time to show up wearing your beautiful and extremely manly, StumpTown Kilt.
If you want to make a statement of confidence without uttering a word.  If you would like to be noticed without doing anything special and be comfortable doing it—just show up in your kilt.  Each StumpTown Kilt is expertly crafted out of the best materials with you in mind.  The come in a wide range of colors and there is a selection of accessories you can get as well.  As a listener of this show you can get a substantial discount by going to there website at:  stumptownkilts.com  then as you are checking out, enter the code:  betterman, all lower case, all one word, and you will receive 10% off your entire purchase.  Summer is here, so don’t wait, head over to stumptownkilts.com today.
Ok, so each one of us have relationships with other people.  We are sons and brothers, fathers, husbands, boyfriends and co-workers.  We are friends, uncles, nephews, and neighbors, and we are customers, employee’s and supervisors.  Every time you interact with another human some degree of relationship is established.  It may be very slight in passing, or it may be profound and deep, but all of these interactions together make up the entire spectrum of your relationships.
All of these relationships from the seemingly insignificant to the profound are important.  They are, as I have said many times, the most valuable things you possess.  The quality of your life, the level of happiness, joy and prosperity you experience on earth is a direct reflection of the quality of your relationships.
It’s just how we were designed as humans.  We are pack animals, we were never intended to be solitary.  This has been proven throughout history because people who have tried to exist alone without a tribe around them inevitably go crazy, and ultimately die.
As a man you have a role in each of these relationships.  You have an obligation to fulfill that role.  Whenever you successfully fulfill your relationship duties you are elevated as a man, along with the quality of that relationship.  How you carry out the function of relationship is a direct reflection on exactly what kind of man you are.
If you become confused about what your role in a relationship should be try putting yourself in the others persons shoes.  Ask yourself the questions; Who am I to this person?  Who should I be to this person?  You will find that there is almost always room for improvement, there is always something you can do to improve any relationship if we are focused on doing that.
For example;  Who are you to your friends?  Are you someone they trust and respect?  Someone they look up to and confide in?  Are you a leader or a follower? 
Knowing yourself is one thing, but knowing who you are to others is something else.  Are you anyone’s hero?  Are you a mentor, do you make other people laugh, do you make them feel safe?  Knowing how you are perceived by others is an extremely valuable tool when it comes to improving yourself.  It provides an extra layer of objectivity that allows you to view yourself from different angles, and improve the areas you see a deficit in.
As I said earlier, every human interaction you have establishes some degree of relationship.  Even to the stranger on the street.  How are you perceived by strangers?  Are you kind, polite, hospitable?  Or, are you rude and dismissive? 
Sometimes on rare occasions, even if we are doing everything we can in a relationship, the other person may not be perceiving us in the way we think they should.  It’s confusing when that happens, but some people are like that.  If you are able to have a talk with that person you might be able to work things out.  Or, maybe that person isn’t the right person for you to be in relationship with.  There are lots of broken people out there who did not get the memo about how valuable relationships are.  This is when knowing yourself well comes in real handy.
If you know you are fulfilling your role in a relationship in spite of how it is received by the other person.  You don’t have to take it personally.  At that point it becomes their problem and you can go on with your life without them if you choose to.
In most cases you will find that people respond very well to your efforts.  When you do something intentionally to improve a relationship most people respond positively.  They notice and appreciate your efforts, the relationship is fortified and strengthened.  Life itself is improved for both of you as a result.
These things apply across the board from the most intimate romantic relationships and the family relationships, to the more mundane work, and social relationships.  Being mindful of who you are in each of these relationships will give you the opportunity to improve them. 
Now head out into the world and ask yourself who you are, what role you play to everyone you encounter.  Consider how you can improve these relationships because they truly are the most valuable thing you possess.  If you do that your life will be better, you will be happier, and you will have become a better man than you were yesterday.
I would love to hear your thoughts about this episode.  You can share your insights on our Facebook page, you can comment directly in the field below, and you can also email me directly at:  [email protected].  
Hey remember to to check out my new book, Forging A Man, available right now on Amazon.

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