The cycles

It’s a cycle I can’t break...She’s stuck in a cycle.The cycle of wanting to go and be extraordinary but afraid of something she can’t see, so she stays stuck in uncertainty.The cycle of feeling a certain way and wanting to say how I feel, but I can’t, so I don’t, so I’m constantly shooting myself in the foot, and unless you speak your truth, you can’t cut the noose. The cycle of wanting to be someone, but not knowing who she is, so she stays who she is.The cycle of always trying to figure out who I am.The cycle of resentment.The cycle of desperately wanting love but deeply afraid of it.The cycle of wanting to get well but she can’t, cuz the cancer treatment fuck her up so her cells are stuck.Thus, the cycles of wanting to let go of the past, but she can’t make sense of what to do next, so she stays the same and now she’s on the verge of going insane.So the cycles are always the same, me versus her...The quest to be Her.To turn pro.When does the war end?When can I end the cycles that keep me stuck in a constant state of never getting ahead?When will I get a helping hand?When will I get the key to my door?When will I feel at Home and when will I feel whole?....today?Tomorrow?Never?Is it even possible for someone like me?Thus, the cycle continues as I sit here and continue to talk about her like she’s not really me.LET’S BE SOCIALConnect with me via my favourite hangouts;+ @ ArtistSarahLong on Instagram+ @AlcoholInkArtStories+ Art Stories Site+ Confessions of an Empath