213: 5 Unexpected Secrets to Build Business Momentum in 2024

Welcome to Episode 213. Are you a mom entrepreneur who struggles with impostor syndrome,  wants to nip overwhelm in the bud, wishes to realize the power of networking and/or wants to turn her business and mom life AROUND in 2024? If yes then hit PLAY.

Say hi to me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/melissallarena/

This is a recording from my free webinar that I conducted on January 9th, entitled Mom Mogul Makeover. You’ll hear how you can put the insights enclosed in my bestselling book Fertile Imagination into action as a mom with a business. This conversation goes beyond any expected insights on productivity, goal-setting, and motherhood. It’s for moms who seek a fresh perspective that's plugged into reality. It’s also perfect for you if you know entrepreneurship is the journey you wish to pursue wholeheartedly for more than three years. Oh, also listen to the end, there is a free opportunity for those listening until the end exclusively for moms with their own businesses. 

To take advantage of that opportunity here is the link: https://www.melissallarena.com/sessions/. This link is for you to secure your free 30-minute breakthrough call with me, which I will invite you to at the end of this webinar. You’ll hear me reference it. 

As further context, this webinar is focused on the game changing five insights that have helped catapult me into success which I want for you too in 2024. So please enjoy the conversation, enjoy the webinar, and let me know if you have any questions. You can ask me your questions on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/melissallarena/ And yet another reason to go to Instagram is that I'd love to know who got value out of this; let me know you are here so I can see who's listening ti keep you in mind as I’ll be running future drawings for listeners. Thank you so much.

TRANSCRIPT

Hello there. My name is Melissa Llarena and I'll share with you my little bio a little later on, but I wanted to just be sure that we are optimizing this time as we are moms in the thick of it.

Even if you're a mom who has. Her kid is an adult. You're still in the thick of it because you still care with all your heart and soul. And so this is time away from them, but it's time on you and your business. And so I honor that. And I respect that. And I just want to invite you to really pour into yourself during this webinar.

Take what feels is going to serve you in 2024 and really consider how you will embody some of these insights. So that 2024 is. As successful as you, as you deserve it to be. So this presentation, I'm just going to jump into it again. I will introduce myself later on, but I just want to be sure that I optimize our time together.

So mom mogul makeover. The makeover is really going to be about mindset shifts that you will want to reflect upon. And flip so that they work in your favor. So I'm going to share with you the five lips, and it's really going to be important. If you've ever struggled with imposter syndrome, or you have felt overwhelmed, or you don't feel like you have the right connections to catapult your business success.

So here we go. Here's the plan. So M. R. O. Y. What is that? I will share with you. I want to also share with you a little bit of what might be going on in your psyche just to see if any of this lands. Then we'll go through the real problem as well as who I am. I promise I would tell you. And then we'll go one by one through the five mindset shifts.

And then at the end, you'll be able to make a decision for yourself. I really like new vocabulary, but I'm not so into equations, but this is my equation. And this is something that I'm sure you have considered. So for a mom, it's not just about investing money and energy and time in her business, but it's also coming at a cost of you being away from your kids.

Also, it comes at a cost in terms of just the psychic energy that you have and the bandwidth that you're able to leverage at any given time, all of that to say, again, that's why this is 20 minutes and not 45 minutes. So what I think about when I think about what success means to a mom, I don't think about just an ROI.

I really do think about a mom's ROI and I see them as completely different. And I also, if you've ever worked in a corporate setting, I also want you to consider that if you have ever asked for a raise, you are not just thinking about your ROI, but your mom ROI. And it's not just tangible like childcare expenses.

It's also the fact that you're not with your kid and you miss them. Okay. So that is why this is 20 minutes. Moving on. Can you relate? And as I go through these, I want you to really think about 2023 and if you've ever experienced some of these ideas, have you ever felt intimidated, yet crazy excited about an outrageous business idea that you never pursued?

A realistic, outrageous idea. So not something like putting someone on Mars, but an idea that you thought to yourself, holy cow, like if I could pull that off, I would be so thrilled and excited, and I might even have what it takes to pull it off, but maybe I'm not ready yet, or I need a lot more resources in order to pull it off.

Have you ever had something like that happen to you? Has imposter syndrome ever caused you to opt for smaller steps when a bigger step was available? And here's the thing, we want to achieve a lot in a small amount of time. And so this could be seen as self-sabotage. But has it ever happened to you that it's been imposter syndrome?

And you knew that you could take a big leap, but you decided to just go baby steps ahead instead. What about overwhelm? Is that like your go to emotion when you can't complete your to do list, maybe due to an interruption? What about this one? And this one I've heard consistently from clients. Have you ever felt disappointed because you couldn't push yourself hard enough to bring your best self to your business or your kids, or have you ever not networked because it felt like you're being needy or maybe it just felt awkward?

Or embarrassing, like you're going to say the wrong thing or put your foot in your mouth or sounds silly. Like you just didn't know enough. And here's the last one. Is it hard for you to articulate your secret sauce as a professional? Because maybe you don't want to set up expectations too high because you know your shit would be one reason.

Or you don't want to let others know the real you. Like there's something there that you don't think is as professional or qualified. So you don't want to reveal something about yourself that's still relevant, but feels a little too sensitive. Okay. Last one. Do you secretly punish or beat yourself up by overworking because you feel that you should be much further along in terms of your business goals?

And this one is a hard one because it's celebrated, right, by society. Working hard, busting your ass, going above and beyond for clients. But could this be the reason why? So while all of that feels heavy and some of that feels relevant, and maybe there's one of those things that was the reason why you're here, I want to just share that there is good news on the other side of this.

Like those are just symptoms. The real problem is that you haven't made what I call the shifts. Okay. And so here's what happens once you make these five shifts that I'm going to share with you in a bit. You will have an opportunity to cast a bigger vision than you have ever cast it for yourself before as a business professional.

You're going to confidently seek shortcuts and straight paths to achieve your five year goals in one and pardon the language, turn imposter syndrome into your own bitch. I know that's so bad by taking bigger steps than those smaller ones. Okay. You will have greater self-awareness to identify when it's you who's making things harder for yourself versus the stories about being a good mom or a successful business owner.

There's so many reasons things feel way harder for us, depending on where you are in your life stage as a mom and as a business owner too. And you will feel comfortable sharing and showcasing your secret sauce. You're going to feel good about your uniqueness. You're not going to feel like standing out is like a terrible thing to do.

You're going to feel good about using your superpowers and telling people what they are. And you're also going to have a tool, an unexpected tool to help you enjoy the process of motherhood and growing your business. And if you've been around the block a couple of times, you have to enjoy the process in order to keep going along the process.

Tenacity is not just something that I grin and bear. It's something that I have to embody and I have to make it enjoyable for me. I would not be here for 12 years if it has not been enjoyable. So who the heck is this person  with the hat? So here's the thing. I'm a normal human being. I just want to say that because as I wrote my book this year, fertile imagination, and it became a number one bestseller in two categories, mother and women in business.

I had to take a step back myself and just reevaluate, like, who am I, why am I so blessed? What is it about me that really is drawn to serve you, mom entrepreneurs? And so I wanted to just share just a couple of highlights. But again, I am a very normal mom, but I will say that I do have a particular switch turned on, which I will absolutely share with you.

Okay, so I mentioned it before bestselling author of fertile imagination host of a podcast called unimaginable wellness And here's my specialty It's helping ambitious moms really confidently put themselves out there right to achieve their meaningful business goals Meaningful is a really important word to me.

Otherwise I could stay in corporate and make a lot of money in corporate. But if I can help you do something that's meaningful to you, your family society, then we all have one. And here's the thing as moms, we have such a rough terrain emotionally in terms of both of our roles, both as businesswomen and as moms.

And in order to achieve anything that's difficult, you have to keep going during the ups and downs. And emotionally, you can totally self-sabotage. You can totally be slowed down if you let yourself be completely barraged by the emotional realities of both being an entrepreneur, which has very high expectations and a mom, which has very high expectations, both of which are very important to you.

I've worked in a lot of places.  So, all this to say.  There's a Swiss army knife perspective that I bring to the world and to any client, whether you are in one vertical, in one country, or you have one child or multiples, I most likely have a very specific approach and framework that can help you. And we can tailor.

I have degrees. Two of them here, but after I pursued my education because I wanted to be a good girl and in the eyes of my parents, I pursued more education because I wanted to be a good mom. And good coach. So I do have a coaching certificate and I am becoming a meditation practitioner and I'm a mom. I have been for 12 years, which parallels the length of time that I have also owned a business, a coaching practice.

So everything that I'm going to share with you is based on firsthand experience, and it's also based on client experience, having worked with working moms and also working dads, which is interesting how you don't hear that phrase too often, for a very long time and through very different economic cycles, the good, the bad, the middle.

So this is who I am, and I've been featured in a lot of things. What I want to just say in terms of all of these credentials and all of these features is this Everything that I’ve pursued it has not been on everyone else's timeline For example being featured in the wall street journal I believe that was like year two or for example getting a degree at nyu or getting one at business school It was done.

So in a way that I had to earn my degrees and earn full rides to them. So everything that I've done has been things through the work of angels, which I will share with you in a bit, but I promise I'll keep this grounded and useful for you, a working mom. So here's the thing. The five shifts they come to me from completely Various experiences I've had in my life and in my career, and really, they are the keys to accelerating any goal that is meaningful to you.

And again, I say that word over and over because I could say that I want to make seven figures. But I got to be honest, it's not meaningful enough, but if I say I want to build a treasure trove of networking contacts for my three little boys, so that this way, when they have a business idea, when they grow up, I have someone to refer them to, that means something to me.

And that's also why my podcast has amazing guests. So here's the five shifts. Alrighty, a crazy goal can keep you sane. I know this sounds opposite and these shifts are all meant to really have you think, is she crazy? And that's okay. I'm totally, totally okay with that. So this is one out of five, a crazy goal can keep you sane.

I recall there were several opportunities in my business where I could have gone for incremental lift in my business in terms of sales goals, or I could have gone for the expected next distribution channel, creating a product for like, I don't even know. 49 or something, but that was totally rational, but not emotionally driven.

It wasn't enough to be like, yeah, I'm going to skip nighttime reading with my three little boys in order to go after building a 29 product, like it just didn't do it for me, but what did keep me going and made me way more sane during a rough patch of my motherhood experience was going after a crazy goal.

So quickly, here's the goal. The goal that I pursued was launching a podcast and having Gary Vaynerchuk, who has millions of people that follow him, and James Altucher on my podcast. That is a crazy ass goal. The reason why it kept me going was because I decided for a hundred days to write a thousand words every day, and I don't know if it all adds up mathematically, but a thousand words or so a day on Medium.com in order to get their attention. Every single day. That was the choice that I made. Let me write this out so that this way I could get either of them on my podcast. Right? These are entrepreneurs. These are multimillionaires. These are people that are above my weight category. That was the most exciting thing and exciting time for me in my life.

And I will say that when I would then wake up my little boys in the morning to go to school or to go to pre care, whatever, I was the world's most excited mom. And it kept me going. It energized me. Had I said, I want to sell this HR screening toolkit product. For 29. 99 and have a million people buy it, if that was my goal, I think I would have been toast.

And so it's the opposite, but it's an insight that if you embody it, if you know emotionally what's going to pull you, and if you take it to, if you take it to the bank and you really execute on it, then it will absolutely keep you sane and happier than a boring run of the mill goal. And that's the reason why a lot of the things that would have taken me five years or forever Didn't take me five years or forever and they made me a happier person ultimately So yes, I got Gary v on my podcast.

I got James alerted on my podcast It took about a hundred days 67 000 words. I did count  But damn, is it a story and it was in my book too, and I wrote it in my book Okay. So that's the first shift. Okay. If you don't get this right, you are not going to feel as energized. You will feel drained. It would have felt draining for me to say, let me sell this HR screening toolkit product to a million people.

And I literally have the product in my store, but it's just not as exciting to me. Next one, imposter syndrome is an asset. You might think to yourself, how is this an asset? Well, you have to make a decision to use it as an asset. And if it's been your habit for decades to see it as a sign that you should like step back or warning that there's something that could happen to you, maybe you're acting beyond your years of experiencing, if that has been your habit.

Then it is going to take work in order to flip it on its head. You're going to have to learn how to actually feel imposter syndrome in your body and take the opposite action. When I interviewed the CEO of giving Tuesday, Asha Quran, she herself said, whenever she felt like an imposter, she would then be Fierce, like totally fierce pursuing that particular task or situation.

That is not the normal sort of approach, but we're not going for ordinary results. We're going for extraordinary results because as a mom. This operating in sprints is something that you have to embody. As an example, I had a holiday break. My children had holiday break and I couldn't work consistently, persistently towards one goal.

I had to like pack it up in a particular timeframe and then basically just go at it in a sprint. Same thing here. So imposter syndrome can be used as an asset. It can be taught for you to use it as an asset, and if you don't use it as an asset. What's going to happen is you're going to feel really insecure, not just about approaching someone that is famous or asking someone for a big sale, but you're going to feel insecure about your story.

You're going to feel insecure about the good, the bad, the ugly about your narrative as a business owner. And chances are that narrative. Has your secret sauce that where I came from, what I've done to get here that has your secret sauce. And if you don't feel that you can share this sometimes vulnerable message with other people, no one's going to know anything about it.

And you're going to sound just like every other person out there who has this amazing way of adding value to someone else's life and just using the same language at that. So turning. Imposter syndrome into an asset is essential and it has to be practiced. And if it's a habit that you've had using it as a stop sign, it needs a lot of practice and guidance too.

Cause we could pretend that we're using it as an asset, but if we're not taking demonstrable action, you're not going to get the numbers you need at the end of 2024.  Third one. Okay. Network and share half baked ideas. This one is intimidating. Let me explain why. So let's imagine that you're networking with someone and you're in the beginning of a business idea.

Some thoughts might pop up in your head. They're going to steal my idea or they're going to think I'm silly or I'm sharing something and really I should wait until I have it complete. Well, here's the thing. And this is going back to what I mentioned earlier, angels. This is so weird, but I'm going to share this first time in the history of share this.

I believe, I believe that there are angels out there that have accomplished what you want to accomplish. And in 2024, it is your business to find those people network with these people and tell as many of many people. You're half baked ideas so that this way, a, you're not as fully invested in the wrong idea.

And then B you get people who want to join you on your journey and help you. For me, how did I become a bestseller in terms of fertile imagination? Well, here's the thing. I decided to attend a podcast conference last year in Colorado, and I decided to make it my business to talk to as many people as humanly possible.

And this was during a casual interaction that I approached this lady, chewing on a big conference, yummy sandwich, aka those sandwiches are not very yummy. And I remember telling her, I've got a book, I'm writing it, and I don't know what the heck to do.  And I was really, really forthcoming. She happens to be the president of the Chicago Marketing Association.

And she has her own podcast and all of that more than that. She took a liking to me and she shared with me, gave me on a silver platter, a plan. This is how you become a bestseller. That plan was meant for 25 people to execute. I am one human being and I have a virtual assistant, but she took a liking to me and she helped me become a bestseller.

What does that mean? I promise you that there are rules to the game that you're playing in your vertical. I promise you that someone else has figured out what to do. And, and sequentially  at that, this person gave me the plan in a way that if I, if I organized it in another way, I would have been ineffective and unable because it was meant for 25 people  network and share half baked ideas.

Yes. You will be vulnerable. Yes. You will be looking less. I don't even know prepared, then you want to feel, but honestly, it's better to be less prepared and have someone give you feedback early on an ideas journey. Then later on when you're totally invested and it happens to be the wrong idea. So this is about seeking angels and I'm calling it that because this has been a consistent pattern in my life.

And it's something that I believe in with all my heart and all my soul. And I will tell my children to do as well. So that's the third point out of five. And if you don't do this in a way that's strategic in a way that is consistent and in a way that unpacks value, when you network with individuals in a generous and authentic and bilateral way, then you're going to miss the whole point.

Because that person that helped me, I helped her to that person who helped me. I know her son wants to work with the Green Bay Packers. I'm not a football person, but that's in my head. And if I find someone that's in that organization, you sure bet that I'm going to mention her son. So it's not about using people or just transactions.

It's about having people in your heart and in your mind for the rest of your life, and they will do the same for you. And that's how you can speed up the process. And if you have a meaningful business goal on your heart, that matters. Third point, fourth one. Playing is profitable. So oftentimes as moms, we think about playing as a to do that happens after you do all your to do's.

And while I appreciate the sentiment because I was there, what I will say is that your results will look very different if you played before versus if you held your breath until you had the time to play. And oftentimes you don't play, right? It's almost like, let my partner play with the kids. Let someone else play with the kids.

Mommy's got to get this or that done. Right? And if you are unaware, playing can be so profitable. And this comes from a podcast guest, Beth Comstock, who was the CMO of GE, GE, one of the most serious businesses you could possibly think about, right? Jet turbines and stuff. So at the end of the day, she challenged herself and her executive team to go where the trends are.

She challenged herself to go, for example, a K pop concert in South Korea, and that is where she garnered some insights that changed the course of the way that GE approaches. Storytelling, loyalty, building, et cetera, et cetera. What does that mean for you? Well, if you're a solopreneur in a market that is competitive, how do you intend to distinguish yourself?

You need to be ahead of the trends. Playing is profitable. On top of that, when we think about overwhelm, overwhelm, rather than be bamboozled by overwhelm, rather than not have a plan for overwhelm, which if you look at your 2024 goals right now, are you setting yourself up for overwhelm? Rather than that.

Why not think about playing in terms of a way to nip overwhelming the bud. I'll give you an example. Maybe I'm an alien, but maybe this is you for me in the past, before this insight, I would, for example, work really, really, really hard and then earn a bubble bath, what I'm suggesting is. Take the bubble baths first, and then maybe you won't have to work as hard.

It really changes the tone of your effort, and you'll be a happier mom. Period. Oh, and guess what? You know what your kids want? They want to play with you more. So that's another opportunity right there to reduce the mom guilt. All right. Fifth one. Overwhelm has to be addressed at its roots. So, overwhelm.

Sometimes I've noticed when I've coached working moms, some of the most bad ass working moms in the universe, we're talking about, for example, a CFO of American express in Canada, bad ass mom. She became a mom. All of a sudden, insecurities pop up. Am I really good? Do I deserve the CFO spot? What if the person that's taking my position during maternity leave takes the actual job?

All of these insecurities really pop up because our emotions are so raw, especially early on. And depending on the stage that you are in as a mom, what happens is That you then just start second guessing yourself and other categories of your life. And then you  overcompensate because you really don't want to get it wrong.

And that's at the root of overwhelm more than that. It's also figuring out as a mom in that role and figuring out as a business owner in that role, what a success look like for you. Or have you been playing the rules that someone else wrote, maybe your mom, maybe an entrepreneur you see on Instagram, might their rules just send you off a cliff.

Like if you don't get this right, you could pretend to be like chilling out at the end of every day and catching up on Z's. But if in your mind, you feel like you're doing less than you should, or you're not enough, that's going to keep nagging at you. And it will slow down your progress as a business owner.

And it'll make you less happy as a mom. So this is something that has to be addressed at its root. And it's really hard to see. It's kind of like a jar with a label on the outside. If you're inside the jar, you cannot read the label. If you have someone outside that understands that there's symptoms here and can help you work through them, then you'll be way better off to actually avoid a train wreck.

So I, I think this one is just. Pretty urgent. Okay, so here's what you need in order to achieve a five year goal in one year. So five things all together, these have to be practiced and embodied and done swiftly to knock out big goals. Why is that? So at the end of the day, you're not going to be faced with challenge only one time.

It's like, Oh, it's 2024 and it's January. And here's that one challenge that I can't convert a particular sales lead or something like that. No, you're going to get that over and over and over in different sort of flavors. And so it has to be something that when you get knocked out the first time. Maybe it takes you and these numbers are totally not based on reality, but maybe it takes you like three days to get back up.

And then the next time it takes you, ideally, if you've practiced these five, two days to get back up. And then the next day, 20 minutes. And then the next day, it's a two minute rage session or something. That's what we're going for. And that's why these five things are not just. Intellectual conversations that can be had.

There has to be an actual immersion in this entire process. There has to be a guide who can tell you just like the jar metaphor when something is not going well as a business owner, so you could then make some change. So now you have a choice.  Now you have a choice. I just shared with you five insights, some of which might sound woo woo because of the angel thing, some of which might sound like they would be impossible for you to do by yourself.

And I've attended webinars just like this. When I have said to myself, first of all, maybe I was double dutying, maybe it was multitasking, right? I was looking at my email. I was looking at another sort of conversation, but these, these conversations and these insights, they're proven. And they're not just proven for a Beth Comstock or Susy Batiz or an Asha Curran.

They're proven for someone like, like you, like me, like someone who constantly has to, in their mind, toggle between, okay, this is what needs to happen at home. Okay, this is what needs to happen in my business. Okay. What about me? Am I even on my list? Like they're proven for individuals who have a meaningful business goal on their heart.

And they're also proven for individuals who have a meaningful and want to continue a meaningful relationship with their kids. And I know that to you, I just know it. I know it. Why else would you be here? Why else do you want to be successful in both realms of this, of this life? Right? So what does this mean?

This means that I can help you. And I can help you in the next 72 hours. So this is what I've done because I anticipated that this webinar might bring up ideas that you've haven't heard before, that you might want to learn a little bit more about. So the next 72 hours, I will put up a link very shortly and you can actually schedule time with me for free 30 minute breakthrough session, and you can share with me your 2024 business goals.

What I would love the honor of doing is helping you filter through these goals based on these insights that I shared with you so that this way any blind spots are addressed up front before you run in the wrong direction of your dreams, right? So what I've done is this 30 minute private call. It's totally free.

And you could just go ahead and sign up right here, but I will also email you a link so that this way you have a time, some time to breathe. I want to be sure that we both have an opportunity to just have some time to breathe, but I want to just have this here for you so that this way. These insights are not just in the air, but they're really tangible and they mean something to how you intend to approach the rest of 2024 so that this way, whatever happened in 2023 that didn't feel was your best or didn't feel when as, as well as it should have doesn't happen again.

Like you want to take different steps for different results. And so that's why I wanted to do this for you. And that's why I honor you. And that's why I'm a hundred percent going to be taking your questions. If you have any, I'll just save a little bit of time, but then we'll absolutely do. The drawing right after, thank you for listening to the webinar.

Here is that link. So you can schedule your breakthrough session in the next 72 hours, or whenever you actually catch this episode, it's www.MelissaLlarena.com/sessions. Those are free 30 minute sessions for mom entrepreneurs who are committed to navigating imposter syndrome for mom entrepreneurs who are committed to finding what is going to help them nip overwhelm in the bud and mom entrepreneurs who are 100 percent open to a fully immersive experience where they will learn how to network effectively, productively. Elegantly and authentically so that this way, if you have a five year plan, you can knock it out in 2024.

I want to be of service to you. Go ahead and sign up for the breakthrough call. No commitment. Just be sure to show up. Be sure to honor that meaningful business goal that you have on your heart by showing up. And bringing you to the table. I'm so excited and thrilled. Again, breakthrough sessions are free 30 minutes and for mom entrepreneurs.

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