Winsome Conviction
106 episodes - English - Latest episode: 13 days ago -A podcast for learning how to deepen convictions without dividing communities. Tune in for insight from Tim Muehlhoff and Rick Langer on how to cultivate understanding, civility, and compassion in disagreement.
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Episodes
Assessing Disagreements Among Friends
April 15, 2024 13:00 - 32 minutes - 22.4 MBIsaac Adams and Austin Suter are back on the podcast to recount a significant disagreement they experienced in their friendship. They go back into the disagreement with Tim and Rick and discuss issues of contempt, interpersonal differences, complexities and wounds, and spiritual battle. They caution against a bulldozer mentality and highlight how to press into hard conversations with gentleness in order to save and deepen a relationship rather than to abandon it. Show notes and a full trans...
On Being Democrat and Pro-Life
April 01, 2024 13:00 - 35 minutes - 24.4 MBToday’s episode is a joint podcast with the Think Biblically podcast, and we have a great conversation with artist and Connecticut state representative Treneé McGee, who is a pro-life member of the Democratic Party. Rep. McGee has a knack for holding together responsibilities and convictions that don’t often go together in our current political climate - artist/politician and pro-life/Democrat. She shares her backstory and talks through some of the challenges and opportunities of engaging th...
A Friendship Forged Through Differences
March 18, 2024 13:00 - 37 minutes - 25.6 MBIsaac Adams and Austin Suter join today’s episode to discuss the challenges and camaraderie they’ve experienced in their interracial friendship. They speak with Tim and Rick about the beginnings of their friendship and the importance of having an established relationship when the difficulties and disagreements hit, which inevitably occur. They discuss the relational elbow grease that is required for friendships to make it through the hard times, and some great insights are provided on how we...
Biola Students Share Their Experience With Unify America
March 04, 2024 14:00 - 37 minutes - 25.5 MBOn this segment of Reports From The Front, two of Tim’s students, Helena and Carson, who are studying Communications at Biola University, discuss their recent experience on Unify America. They seized the opportunity to speak with their political opposites on contested issues, including abortion, and they speak with Tim and Rick about what it was like. Over the course of the conversation they also consider why it would be good for churches to take part in these Unify America discussions. If t...
Reports From The Front: Unify America
February 19, 2024 14:00 - 44 minutes - 30.9 MBToday on the podcast we have another segment of Reports From The Front, a positive story of someone who is doing things right. Tim and Rick speak with Abby Ferguson, Director of Partnerships with Unify America, on the challenges of communicating personal convictions to people we disagree with as well as progress Unify America is seeing with students who participate in the Unify Challenge College Bowl. They discuss how Unify America brings people together to replace political fighting with co...
Why Are People Leaving Church?
February 05, 2024 14:00 - 29 minutes - 20 MBJim Davis, pastor and co-author of the recent book, The Great Dechurching: Who’s Leaving, Why Are They Going, and What Will It Take to Bring Them Back, is back on the podcast to speak with Tim and Rick about some of the reasons why people are leaving churches. They talk about the role incivility, poor communication, “clustering,” and online habits play in the process of dechurching. They also reflect on the Apostle Paul’s teaching on the body life of the Church and consider whether there are...
On The Road To UC Berkeley
January 22, 2024 14:00 - 29 minutes - 20.1 MBThrough our connections with CRU, a ministry that engages students and faculty on college campuses across the U.S., the Winsome Conviction Project received an invitation to provide training for a student group at UC Berkeley on how to have winsome conversations with people who hold opposing views. Tim and Rick reflect on this learning experience and the key questions and issues discussed among the group, including student's perceptions of Jesus, and they share ideas on how to show faith matt...
Be An Ambassador for Christ: Statecraft and Shrewdness
January 08, 2024 14:00 - 34 minutes - 23.6 MBIn 2 Corinthians 5:20, the Apostle Paul tells Christians they are “ambassadors for Christ.” Ambassadorship is part of our Christian identity. Paul wrote these words a long time ago, so what does it look like to be an ambassador today? On this episode, communication theorist Tim Downs returns to the podcast to discuss this question with Tim and Rick. They discuss the difference between citizenship and statecraft, the nature of statecraft, including its practices and temperament, and consider ...
The Four Horsemen of the (Relational) Apocalypse
December 25, 2023 14:00 - 30 minutes - 20.7 MBConflict in relationships is unavoidable. Healthy and successful relationships know how to counteract unhealthy communication styles and adopt alternative forms of discourse to work through the conflict. On this episode, Tim and Rick discuss John Gottman’s famous metaphor for unhealthy communication styles that lead to failure in relationships, the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse. They unpack each horseman - complaints vs criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling, and they discuss...
Getting Help From Gottman
December 11, 2023 14:00 - 32 minutes - 22.7 MBAmerican psychologist John Gottman has a knack for discerning healthy arguments from unhealthy ones, and he is known for identifying pattern markers that spell doom for a relationship. On this episode, Tim and Rick draw key insights from Gottman’s body of research on disagreement in relationships and patterns of healthy communication and discuss application for civility and unity in disagreement, with special consideration for relationships in the Church. Show notes and a full transcript ar...
Let's Work On Indirect Communication
November 27, 2023 14:00 - 30 minutes - 21.1 MBCulture changes, and rapid shifts in culture generate challenges in communication. Although the truth of the Gospel is timeless, Christians should do their homework on changes in culture and figure out how to shape the Good News so that it is hearable. On today’s episode, Tim and Rick are joined by Tim Down, author, cartoonist and communication theorist. They discuss both timeless and changing methods of communication, and Tim provides insights he has learned on the value of indirect communi...
The Great Dechurching
November 13, 2023 14:00 - 26 minutes - 17.9 MBJim Davis, pastor and co-author of the recent book, The Great Dechurching: Who’s Leaving, Why Are They Going, and What Will It Take to Bring Them Back, comes on the podcast to talk about the current and fastest religious shift going on in America. Tim and Rick speak with Jim about a comprehensive study he help conduct looking at people who are leaving churches and the reasons why they are leaving. They discuss characteristics of people who are “dechurching,” including misconceptions on why p...
It's Not Pointless, Good Things Still Happen
October 30, 2023 13:00 - 32 minutes - 22.5 MBWe’re revisiting a question we frequently get: “Why bother talking to somebody if you aren’t going to change their mind?” Especially in the argument culture, conversing with someone who won’t change their mind can seem pointless, an exercise in futility. While persuading someone to change their mind is a good and worthy goal in a conversation, and sometimes people’s opinions need to be changed, it’s also worth recognizing goods that often come about even if the other party isn’t budging on t...
Tim Keller's Remarkable Civility
October 16, 2023 13:00 - 33 minutes - 23.1 MBTim Keller was a pastor in New York City who had enormous influence far beyond the city limits. He died of pancreatic cancer in May 2023. One of his many influences that is sure to endure will be on how engage public life with faithful Christian witness. On this episode, Tim and Rick share lessons they have learned from Tim Keller on representing the Christian faith and Christian convictions with remarkable civility, especially during difficult times and in hard places. They discuss Keller’s...
Why Talk To Someone If They Won't Change Their Mind?
October 02, 2023 13:00 - 27 minutes - 19 MBWhy bother having a discussion if the other party isn’t going to change their mind? Fair question, and it’s one we get a lot. So, let’s consider what makes the struggle of sticking with it worth it. On this episode, Tim and Rick discuss what to keep in mind when a disagreement appears pointless and going nowhere, and they highlight that appearances of futility oftentimes yield fruitful learning and a deeper relationship with the other party. Show notes and a full transcript are available.
When Christians Disagree
September 18, 2023 13:00 - 47 minutes - 32.5 MBIt can get messy when you seek to have a faithful presence in your community and love your neighbors while holding to your theological convictions. Greg Stump, pastor at Redeemer Church in La Mirada, CA, is back on the podcast to talk through how he navigated having faithful presence when presented with a great ministry opportunity in his neighborhood. Greg, Tim and Rick then shift gears and have a theological disagreement on hell. Yes, you read that right - Tim and Rick have a disagreement ...
A Rabbi, An LDS Bishop, And An Imam Walk Into A Church
September 04, 2023 13:00 - 26 minutes - 18.6 MB“Can we love our neighbors if we don’t even know them?” This question helped to kickstart a summertime series on interfaith conversations at Redeemer Church in La Mirada, CA, to engage people and leaders of different faiths in the community. On this segment of Reports From The Front, Greg Stump, executive pastor at Redeemer Church discusses these Redeemer Conversations with Tim and Rick. Greg shares stories and insights on how they host these conversations. This episode highlights the import...
Perspective-Taking
August 21, 2023 13:00 - 30 minutes - 20.9 MBThere are a handful of bedrock principles and practices that inform having a winsome conviction, and a big one is perspective-taking. Tim digs into his graduate education in communication studies and draws out the difference between listening to evaluate and listening to understand. Usually, we jump right to evaluation before seeking to understand, and this often results in communication gridlock. So, they explore practices for listening to understand, ways to embody perspective-taking and w...
When Conflict Persists, What Do You Do?
August 07, 2023 13:00 - 32 minutes - 22.6 MBTim and Rick discuss a recent Barna study that highlights notable differences involving perceptions - how Christians perceive themselves and how Christians are perceived in culture. Rick also draws from his bag of metaphors and considers whether the Church is a thermometer or a thermostat in the argument culture, and they spend some time discussing aspirations to holiness and the charge in the old hymn, “Trust and Obey” in light of contemporary challenges. Show notes and a full transcript a...
Reports From The Front: Repairing Misconceptions
July 24, 2023 13:00 - 26 minutes - 18.1 MBFor another segment on Reports from The Front, Tim and Rick continue the discussion with pastor Dan Broyles on how social services and faith communities can work together to address social problems. Dan talks about the misconceptions social services and faith communities have of each other that oftentimes prevent collaboration, and they consider ways these groups might build trust and partner to help local families and communities. Show notes and a full transcript are available.
Reports from The Front: Repairing Misconceptions
July 24, 2023 13:00 - 26 minutes - 18.1 MBFor another segment on Reports from The Front, Tim and Rick continue the discussion with pastor Dan Broyles on how social services and faith communities can work together to address social problems. Dan talks about the misconceptions social services and faith communities have of each other that oftentimes prevent collaboration, and they consider ways these groups might build trust and partner to help local families and communities. Show notes and a full transcript are available.
Reports From The Front: Connect Before You Correct
July 10, 2023 13:00 - 25 minutes - 17.7 MBHow do we engage with people who hold different beliefs? Oftentimes, the impulse is to correct the other, and this is especially the case in the argument culture. But what if we began by connecting, establishing a baseline of trust and finding points of agreement? Dan Broyles is a pastor in LA County who is doing just this, and he joins the podcast today to speak with Tim and Rick on the ways he is bridging the gap between county social services and religious organizations and faith communit...
Reports from The Front: Connect Before You Correct
July 10, 2023 13:00 - 25 minutes - 17.7 MBHow do we engage with people who hold different beliefs? Oftentimes, the impulse is to correct the other, and this is especially the case in the argument culture. But what if we began by connecting, establishing a baseline of trust and finding points of agreement? Dan Broyles is a pastor in LA County who is doing just this, and he joins the podcast today to speak with Tim and Rick on the ways he is bridging the gap between county social services and religious organizations and faith communit...
Dial It Back
June 26, 2023 13:00 - 27 minutes - 18.6 MBWhen arguments escalate, we need to know how to make our words and actions less forceful and extreme. While many listeners will not find themselves in an argument that leads to a physical confrontation, self-defense expert Nick Drossos speaks with Tim on disciplines in self-defense that help to de-escalate heated conversations and hostile arguments. Tim and Nick discuss training in breathing and principles in the art of communication. Show notes and a full transcript are available.
Talking About Abuse In Relationships
June 12, 2023 13:00 - 18 minutes - 13 MBBack in April, to help draw attention to Sexual Assault Awareness month, the Winsome Conviction Project partnered with Biola’s Center for Marriage and Relationships to host a series of events to raise awareness of sexual violence and educate communities on how to prevent it. Chris Grace, co-host of the Art of Relationships podcast, joined with Tim to speak with Nick Drossos, a self-defense expert, on domestic violence, and Nick shares his story of being a victim in an abusive relationship. ...
On Convictional Kindness with Russell Moore
May 29, 2023 13:00 - 46 minutes - 31.8 MBRussell Moore (PhD) is back on the podcast to speak on “convictional kindness” and how to apply it in a divisive culture. The conversation draws from 2 Timothy 2 where the apostle Paul instructs Christians to "be kind to everyone" and to "correct opponents with gentleness." Can Paul’s instruction to Christians work in our own time when we face hostility? And what factors influence our ability to embody kindness that leads to change, especially during times when we enter into disagreement on ...
Want Peace? Start Young
May 15, 2023 13:00 - 26 minutes - 18 MBPrashan De Visser returns to the podcast to speak with Tim and Rick on trends and themes he observes in America that undermine peacemaking efforts. Drawing from his experience with Global Unites, Prashan underscores the importance of working with the young generation and how the older generation can help the younger generation. They also discuss theological underpinnings for peacemaking as well as practical ways to engage in peacemaking efforts. You can listen to the previous conversation wi...
On Faithful Witness with Robert George
May 01, 2023 13:00 - 33 minutes - 23.1 MBTim and Rick sit down with Dr. Robert George, a renowned professor, legal scholar, political philosopher, and public intellectual, and this year’s recipient of Biola University’s Charles W. Colson Conviction and Courage award. Dr. George has maintained a very devout and a very public Christian faith, and he is a model of what sociologist James Davison Hunter calls "faithful presence" at the most elite levels of American culture. They talk with Dr. George about modeling a genuine love and abi...
Can We Opt Out Of Gentleness?
April 17, 2023 13:00 - 29 minutes - 20 MBThe temptation to resist being gentle is strong, especially in the argument culture. Personal slights and hostile communication all prey upon the urge to respond in kind, with harshness, and a gentle response most often feels irritating and ineffective. Yet, can a Christian opt out of being gentle? In this episode, Rick and Tim explore how gentleness was Jesus’ favored way of speaking up, notably when he was “in the fight” and sticking up for truth and advocating for justice. They also explo...
A Blessing For An Insult
April 03, 2023 13:00 - 23 minutes - 15.8 MBTrading an insult for an insult is tempting, at times fiendishly satisfying, and doing so will surely deepen division. It may be for this reason Peter warns the Church against this manner of engagement and urges another way. In today’s episode, Tim and Rick look at 1 Peter 3 and reflect on Peter’s counsel to the early Christians when they experienced insult and draw relevance and application for us today. Show notes and a full transcript are available.
The Cost of Not Knowing a Different Point Of View
March 20, 2023 13:00 - 30 minutes - 20.9 MBHow should Christians express a Christ-like posture in the public square? What expression should that posture take when political disagreements arise? Patrick Miller is back on the podcast to speak with Rick about influences shaping how communities of Christian faith engage in disagreement, notably when disagreement involves political concern. They discuss empathy, the cost of not knowing someone who holds a different political viewpoint, as well as pastoral insights on cultivating a soul th...
Be Courageous, Practice Humility & Show Curiosity
March 06, 2023 14:00 - 29 minutes - 20.5 MBWhen relationships are fractured and church communities are splintering, what can we do to help put an end to the divisions? Rick speaks with Patrick Miller, pastor and co-author of the book, Truth Over Tribe: Pledging Allegiance to the Lamb, not the Donkey or the Elephant, on cultural influences contributing to division and how Jesus models a way forward that we can put into practice. Show notes and a full transcript are available.
Making God Big Again
February 20, 2023 14:00 - 16 minutes - 11.1 MBWe’re trying something new on the podcast today. Rick draws from Psalm 46 to help us reflect on fears we are experiencing with respect to political issues and engagement. Remembering that God is “a refuge” and “a help” and “a hope” has been vital for God’s people throughout history, and these truths provide needed perspective for us today in our own cultural moment. Show notes and a full transcript are available.
Having a Civil Disagreement
February 06, 2023 14:00 - 32 minutes - 22.5 MBTim and Rick have a civil disagreement with atheist philosopher and popular YouTuber Tom Jump. They explore dynamics of religious belief and factors that influence belief toward or against God. They illustrate how we might have a civil disagreement on issues involving theistic belief and religious conversion. Show notes and a full transcript are available.
Engaging Perspectives with Tom Jump
January 23, 2023 14:00 - 27 minutes - 18.7 MBHere at the Winsome Conviction Project we engage differing and diverse perspectives, so we’re grateful to have Tom Jump, an atheist and philosopher who runs a popular YouTube channel, join today’s episode. Tom shares some of his story that influenced a shift away from Christianity and toward atheism. Tim, Rick and Tom also discuss the influence of online chats within today’s argument culture and the very real challenges of communicating across in-groups online. They round out the time on the...
Building Bridges People Will Cross
January 09, 2023 14:00 - 37 minutes - 25.9 MBPrashan De Visser knows something about working through contention. Following 26 years of civil war in Sri Lanka, in 2009 he founded Sri Lanka Unites and began placing his effort to heal his home country by promoting hope and reconciliation. Since that time, Sri Lanka Unites has expanded to 13 countries and is known as Global Unites. They have engaged 1.5 million youth who are learning to build alliances with former enemies, work toward a just and thriving society, and deal with hatred and v...
Prepare Yourself: Hard Conversations at the Holidays
December 19, 2022 14:00 - 16 minutes - 11.3 MBYou’re enjoying some festive fare and then it happens: you hear an offensive comment or a family member says something disagreeable and your emotional heat begins to boil. What do you do? How do you respond? Is there anything you can do preemptively to help yourself and the situation in that moment? On this episode, Tim and Rick discuss spiritual discipline exercises you can do to prepare for hard conversations with family and friends during the holidays. Show notes and a full transcript ar...
A Field Guide to Winsome Conversations at the Holidays
December 05, 2022 14:00 - 19 minutes - 13.7 MBThe holidays can be a meaningful time with friends and family, but gathering at the holiday table can also be trying and fraught with difficult conversations on hot-button issues. On this episode, Tim and Rick discuss how to navigate difficult conversations this holiday season in the hope of preserving relationship and deepening connection with others. Show notes and a full transcript are available.
The Call to Civility, Part 2
November 21, 2022 14:00 - 25 minutes - 17.7 MBAmerican theologian philosopher Richard Mouw has been championing a call to civil discourse on religious, political, and other social issues for well over four decades. On this episode, he resumes the conversation with Tim and Rick on a distinctly Christian approach to civility. Dr. Mouw shares personal experiences in interfaith dialogues and other exchanges involving pointed disagreement where he needed to simultaneously hold fast to his faith convictions while honoring and even demonstrati...
The Call to Civility, Part 1
November 07, 2022 14:00 - 21 minutes - 15 MBCan we think about civility from a distinctly Christian perspective? American theologian philosopher Richard Mouw joins the podcast to explore this question with Tim and Rick. Dr. Mouw has been thinking about civility and helping religious and political parties engage in civil discourse for over 40 years, and he sits down to share stories and insights gained. The conversation ranges over the biblical mandate to be civil, the difference between gentleness and civility, and how to keep things ...
Civility Matters with Andrew Sullivan, Part 2
October 24, 2022 13:00 - 18 minutes - 12.8 MBTim and Rick resume the conversation with Andrew Sullivan on civility and its vital role in a healthy democracy. In this episode, Andrew reflects on the quality of generosity in many Americans, a bright spot in dark times of the argument culture; the discussion then turns to the topic of cancel culture where Andrew candidly shares his experience of being cancelled; and they round out the discussion on two ideas for practicing civility – the method of the dialectic and a lesson from Britain’s...
Civility Matters with Andrew Sullivan, Part 1
October 10, 2022 13:00 - 18 minutes - 12.6 MBCivility is a requirement for a healthy republic. But we seem to be losing faith in civility, and people are confused on what civility involves and when to be civil. Andrew Sullivan joins the podcast to speak with Tim and Rick on a range of social issues that bear on civility. In this episode, they discuss the danger of labels and the importance of humanizing others before mining the secret of a health democracy. This is part 1 of a 2-part conversation with Andrew Sullivan on civility. Sho...
Silence and Civility, Part 2
September 26, 2022 13:00 - 32 minutes - 22.4 MBTim resumes the discussion with Stephanie Bennett (PhD) on her new book, “Silence, Civility, and Sanity: Hope for Humanity in a Digital Age.” They take a deeper look at silence as a set of practices for counteracting unhealthy and uncivil discourse. Dr. Bennett unpacks two types of silence - contemplative silence and ontological silence - to help us reclaim civil communication and healthy public conversation. They round out the conversation discussing Dr. Bennett’s trilogy of novels, “Within...
Silence and Civility, Part 1
September 12, 2022 13:00 - 32 minutes - 22.4 MBStephanie Bennett (PhD) joins Tim to discuss her new book, “Silence, Civility, and Sanity: Hope for Humanity in a Digital Age.” In this episode, they discuss features of the fallout from digital culture on our communication, including the dangers of immediacy, the prevalence of noise, and other dynamics in our speech that prevent or erode healthy, meaningful, and civil dialogue. They begin to explore practices involving silence, including a media fast, as one antidote. This is part 1 of a 2-...
On Contempt with Arthur Brooks
August 29, 2022 15:00 - 36 minutes - 25.1 MBArthur C. Brooks (PhD) joins the podcast to talk about our culture of contempt and how it is contributing to the polarization in America today. What is contempt? How is it different from anger? And how does contempt affect us and our relationships? Do the social sciences and the Bible provide insight on the pitfalls of contempt and how to steer clear from danger? Tim and Arthur discuss these questions and more today on the podcast. They also unpack the importance of choosing to love one anot...
That Impressed Me, Part 2
August 15, 2022 15:00 - 29 minutes - 20.5 MBTim and Rick continue going back through the archive of episodes on the podcast and highlight ideas, practices and moments with guests that stand out. In this episode, they discuss Shane Hurley's grassroots approach to helping people talk about race (Episode 13, Mar 1, 2021); Russell Moore on issues polarizing the generations in the Church (Episode 38, Feb 14, 2022); Theon Hill on what to do when people don't want to listen to what you have to say (Episodes 34-35, beginning on Dec 20, 2021);...
That Impressed Me, Part 1
August 01, 2022 15:00 - 27 minutes - 18.6 MBTo celebrate the 50th episode, Tim and Rick reflect on previous episodes on the podcast and highlight ideas, practices and moments with guests that have left a lasting impression. On this episode, they discuss the argument culture; David French on the dangers of like-mindedness (Episode 5, Nov. 16, 2020); Julia Wood on navigating the complexities of movements and theories (Episode 16-17, beginning on April 12, 2021); and Gregg Ten Elshof on getting curious when it comes to shame (Episodes 39...
Talking About Race, Part 2
July 18, 2022 15:00 - 38 minutes - 26.6 MBTim and Isaac Adams resume the conversation on race and discuss practical insights and advice for the Church when we talk about race. They draw from a fictional shooting in Isaac's book, Talking About Race, to explore ideas and practices for developing biblical conviction and faithful engagement with racial tensions and problems. The conversation also touches on systemic or structural racism, the centrality of forgiveness, and the relational newness we ought to demonstrate as a result of the...
Talking About Race, Part 1
July 04, 2022 15:00 - 29 minutes - 20.2 MBIt's hard to talk about race, so we're looking to Isaac Adams for help. Isaac Adams is the lead pastor of Ironside City Church in Birmingham, Alabama, and he recently wrote a book on race for Christians. Tim speaks with Isaac about the origins of the book, the significance of narrative, the wisdom in listening and the importance of mutual engagement, and why God's Word should be the light that illuminates our conversations on race and racism. This is part 1 of a 2-part conversation on race w...
Hospitable Orthodoxy, Part 3
June 20, 2022 15:00 - 27 minutes - 18.8 MBTim and Rick have been discussing the practice of hospitable orthodoxy with Dr. Karen Swallow Prior. In this episode, Dr. Prior shares how reading the Great Books have helped her to cultivate a posture of hospitable orthodoxy to those with whom she disagrees. They also dig into the connection between empathy and reading broadly and how reading helps us with the virtues. This is part 3 of a 3-part conversation with Dr. Karen Swallow Prior. Show notes and a full transcript are available at: h...