What's Your Grief Podcast
100 episodes - English - Latest episode: 6 days ago - ★★★★ - 110 ratingsIn this podcast Eleanor Haley, MS and Litsa Williams, MA, LCSW-C, the mental health professionals behind the website and book 'What's Your Grief', leave no stone unturned in demystifying the complicated and messy world of living life after loss.
One digestible topic at a time, Haley and Williams distill topics ranging from grief theory to coping. Grievers and grief professionals alike will find their approach practical, relatable, informative and engaging. Grief is sad and confusing, but your grief support doesn't have to be.
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Episodes
The Confusion of Grieving Without Tears
April 19, 2024 16:36 - 41 minutes - 77 MBThere are many complicated and unexpected grief experiences. One that comes up time and again is why sometimes we expect to cry and . . . don't. It's more common than you'd think and in this episode we're chatting about why. If you like the podcast, you'll love WYG Grief Support Hub (it's our griever member community - think of it as our Patreon, but a zillion times better). Support the podcast and get TONS more grief support. You can learn more here. Visit whatsyourgrief.com for hundr...
Grieving When the Relationship was Complicated
April 09, 2024 16:38 - 42 minutes - 79 MBPeople are complicated. Human relationships are complicated. There are many people in our lives with whom we have love-hate relationships with. We don't just grieve when the people we have positive relationships die. We can also grieve people who harmed us, caused us pain, and were abusive. There are many reasons why grieving these people can bring up unique challenges. In this episode we talk about those difficulties and what you can do to cope. If you like the podcast, you'll love WYG ...
The Ebbs and Flows of Grief Over Time
April 03, 2024 20:57 - 42 minutes - 80.4 MBYou hear all the time that grief isn't linear, but that doesn't change the surprises in the ways it ebbs and flows over time. In this episode we talk about the predictably unpredictably cycles of grief and the ways grief continues wax and wane as it intersects with so many other aspects of life. But we start with a good old chat about trying to get our sh*t together and just how hard that can be. If you like the podcast, you'll love WYG Grief Support Hub (it's our griever member community...
Grieving a Friend
March 22, 2024 18:55 - 42 minutes - 79 MBIn this episode, we talk about grieving a friend. Litsa has had four friends die in the last four years. As a grief therapist and someone who is not new to grief, it has left her reflecting on some of the unique and unexpected aspects of these losses. Though we're primarily focusing on when a friend dies in this episode, you can check out this article about grieving a friend following a falling out or estrangement. If you want to read more about the death of a friend you can check out th...
Revisiting the Continuing Bonds Theory of Grief
March 16, 2024 01:17 - 55 minutes - 105 MBContinuing Bonds Theory is both one of our favorite grief theories and also a griever favorite. And yet it's been ages since we've done an episode about it. So long, in fact, that a new book and a fair bit of new research has come out that has further shaped how with think about continuing bonds. If you're grieving and you haven't heard of continuing bonds, we think you'll probably like it. And if you're familiar with continuing bonds, we hope it will remind you of some of your connections a...
How Do You Categorize Grief?
March 07, 2024 18:22 - 35 minutes - 67.6 MBIf you've ever wondered why our grief support isn't broken down by type of loss, today you'll find your answer. In this episode we talk about the question "what's your grief?". Specifically, we break down why, for us, this question has always had less to do with who died and more to do with the unique nature of your relationship with that person and the specific experiences and challenges of your grief. If you like the podcast, you'll love WYG Grief Support Hub (it's our griever member co...
The Many Complicated Feelings Around Final Goodbyes
February 29, 2024 21:48 - 45 minutes - 85.1 MBIn this episode, we address a question from a bereaved mom who didn't see her daughter after her daughter's death. She finds herself wondering if she should have fought harder to see her daughter. This brings up so many questions held by grievers no matter what decisions they made around a death -- often some variation of "should I have done something differently and would that have eased this pain?" *** The WYG Hub (it's our griever member community - think of it as our Patreon, but a z...
Building Walls to Avoid Further Loss
February 22, 2024 14:48 - 31 minutes - 59.8 MBThis week we respond to a question from one of our Hub members. Grief anxiety is very real and, unfortunately, the very connections that can ease anxiety in grief can also be the source of that anxiety. We're chatting about that complicated experience after loss when you find yourself fearful of creating new relationships for fear of losing people while also wanting connection and fearing being alone. The thoughts and feeling are so complicated. *** The WYG Hub (it's our griever member...
Grief Comfort and Grief Criticism on Social Media
February 15, 2024 19:51 - 41 minutes - 69.4 MBIn this episode, we dive into the world of grief in the digital era. Specifically we talk about what it really means to express sorrow online and the frustrating misconceptions that grief posts are just for attention. Some people turn to social media for support during tough times and genuine empathy means looking past the many assumptions about what's behind these posts. Sign up for our free February grief support webinar here. Visit whatsyourgrief.com for hundreds of free articles we...
Befriending Grief
February 08, 2024 00:34 - 59 minutes - 111 MBIn this episode, Litsa and Mary chat about what it means to 'befriend grief'. This includes plenty of thoughts about how modern western culture shapes our beliefs about death and grief, with a healthy dose of how we try to counteractive some of the pressures to pathologize grief. In this episode, Mary mentions the follow books that have had a big impact on her grief lens: The Wild Edge of Sorrow The Smell of Rain on Dust Visit whatsyourgrief.com for hundreds of free articles we've wri...
Relief in Grief
January 31, 2024 09:30 - 35 minutes - 66.9 MBIn this episode respond to a question about feeling relief after a death. But first, we talk about the recent Vox article The Race to Optimize Grief and the wild wild west of how AI is changing the way people mourn. Visit whatsyourgrief.com for hundreds of free articles we've written about all things grief and loss. You can read more about relief in grief here. Join the WYG Hub (it's our griever member community - think of it as our Patreon, but a zillion times better). It opens for ...
The Grief of Anticipated-Sudden Deaths
January 26, 2024 16:42 - 34 minutes - 64.7 MBIn this episode we talk about a new article on the website that Litsa wrote about a concept she's termed "paradoxical grief". It's the often-confusing experience of grieving a loss that is both anticipated but also sudden and shocking. We talk about this experience that is both incredibly common and yet also rarely talked about in grief, in part because it can feel difficult to explain. You can check out the article here: https://whatsyourgrief.com/the-paradoxical-grief-of-anticipated-s...
From Grief Literacy to Grief Humility
January 18, 2024 15:47 - 57 minutes - 108 MBWe kick off this episode with our review of the new Dan Levy Netflix film "Good Grief". If you haven't watched it and don't want any spoilers, jump into the episode closer to minute 27. In the rest of the episode we address a common question that comes up for grievers: with so much information out there about grief, why aren't people more grief-literate? Which of course begs the question, what is grief literacy? Should that be what we strive for? We're not so sure. The documentary Litsa m...
Moving Forward Challenges (in the New Year and Beyond)
January 09, 2024 17:48 - 39 minutes - 73.8 MBCome to the free Grieving in the New Year Webinar with Litsa this Sunday - sign up here -- https://whatsyourgrief.ck.page/432a2df1e7 This week we're talking about all the surprising challenges of facing the new year in grief. Everything from the passage of time to a Hub member question about what it means to 'live your best life' without fear of forgetting. The book Litsa mentioned in the episode is Wintering: The Power of Rest and Retrea in Difficult Times (though she hasn't read it, s...
The Griefy-est Time of the Year
December 20, 2023 13:42 - 31 minutes - 58.5 MBWe're back with an episode about - you guessed it - grief at the holidays! Sure, we've talked about this basically every year here on the podcast. Yes, we have approximately a zillion articles about it on the website. AND we still have more to say on the topic! Because there is simply so much that the holidays bring up when it comes to loss. Other holiday grief support: For a lot more practical and creative support, watch our free webinar on coping with grief at the holidays here. Find tons o...
Grief Meets Existential Dread
May 31, 2023 08:20 - 39 minutes - 74.1 MBIn this episode we're going deep, talking about a very common but rarely discussed issue in grief: existential dread. Loss can make us face big questions about life and purpose. It makes us face our own mortality. This week we talk about what it's like to gaze long into the abyss. We reflect on our own discomfort with death (and our comfort with that discomfort). We don't have ads or a patreon. What helps us most is if you join the WYG hub for grief learning and connection. Open for summe...
Mother's Day & Father's Day Grief
May 09, 2023 16:53 - 37 minutes - 69.8 MBMay is here and that means the looming grief triggers of Mother's Day and Father's Day are upon us. In this episode we cover all the basics - why it's hard, who is impacted (spoiler alert: it isn't just bereaved parents and bereaved children), and some suggestions for coping. We have tons of Mother's Day and Father's Day articles and support over on What's Your Grief. Start with some of our favorites. Other mentions from the episode: Honest Obituaries site. We don't have ads or a pa...
When Grief Meets Anxiety
April 12, 2023 21:59 - 46 minutes - 87.3 MBAnxiety is one of those grief experiences that is incredibly common and yet often catches people off guard. If you experienced difficult levels of anxiety before a loss, it can feel worse than ever as you navigate grief. And even if you never struggled with managing anxiety before, your loss can bring it up. In this episode we talk about the relationship between grief and anxiety, some common reasons for it, and offer some suggestions on how to manage it. Here are the two of the anxiety w...
What Are You Doing Here?
March 12, 2023 14:42 - 23 minutes - 43.6 MBThis week we're reflecting on what's were doing here. Not in the existential sense (though we're certainly always angsting about that on some level). But in the sense that we're curious what you want to hear more of. We hope you'll give a listen and then answer these 3 (very simple) questions to help guide our future episodes. https://form.jotform.com/230677758851066 We don't have ads or a patreon. What helps us most is if you join the WYG member community for grief education, connection, ...
Decades On, Grief Still Surprises Us
February 22, 2023 21:54 - 27 minutes - 51.1 MBThough there have been significant losses in our lives in the decades since, each of us looks back to the deaths of a parent early in life as formative to our lives and specifically our work in grief. In this episode, we reflect on the ways those remote personal losses still surprise us - even now. We don't have ads or a patreon. What helps us most is if you join the WYG member community for grief education, connection, accountability, a grief book club & more. It is only $8.33/month if ...
Ask Me Anything (about Grief)
January 31, 2023 16:00 - 31 minutes - 22.4 MBLitsa's flying solo this week, answering questions about grief submitted on Instagram. Talking about supporting partners, siblings, navigating grief conversations with friends, plushies, and more! We don't have ads or a patreon. What helps us most is if you join the WYG member community for grief education, connection, accountability, a grief book club & more. It is only $8.33/month if you join annually and it is a big part of what keeps the podcast going - https://whatsyourgrief.com/onli...
New Year, Same Me
January 14, 2023 10:21 - 28 minutes - 52.7 MBWe're two days into 2023 and the theme for us has been . . . meh. That 'new year, new me' rhetoric gets old fast. In this episode we're talking about why moving into a new year can feel hard, especially for grievers. That means musing about what happiness is (and isn't), the appeal (and risks) of a 'fresh start', and living a 'because of' life instead of an 'in spite of' life. Read Eleanor's article that we mention here. Want to join our free webinar on coping with grief in the new year...
Winter of Our Disconnection
December 23, 2022 16:19 - 45 minutes - 85.8 MBEleanor's been feeling pretty disconnected this holiday season. Though that might sound better than feeling terrible, it turns out that numbness and disconnection are their own version of unsettling. In this episode, we're tackling this common-but-difficult-to-describe experience in grief - feeling nothing and what to do about it. 2022 is winding down and we'd love your support to keep this podcast going in 2023. Please consider joining our What's Your Grief circle community - there are t...
Feeling Relief in Grief
December 12, 2022 19:27 - 19 minutes - 35.5 MBRelief is one of the more common grief emotions and yet it is one that people often feel ashamed to mention. So today we're talking about relief in grief - what it is, what it isn't, how to understand it, and personal experiences with it. About us: Eleanor Haley, MS and Litsa Williams, MA, LCSW-C are the co-founders of What's Your Grief, one of the largest online grief and bereavement support communities. Both are mental health professionals who have lived through significant death and no...
Holiday Musings on Family & Impermanence
December 01, 2022 14:53 - 28 minutes - 53.3 MBThis week we were feeling the post-Thanksgiving emotional grief hangover. That means musings on family, holidays past and present, and the ways we grieve the things we assumed would always be part of our lives, but aren't. We don't have ads or a patreon. What helps us most is if you join the WYG member community for grief education, connection, accountability, a grief book club & more. It is only $10/month and it is a big part of what keeps the podcast going - https://whats-your-grief-co...
Grieving the Past, Present, and Future
November 10, 2022 22:20 - 42 minutes - 79 MBThis week we talk about yet another unexpected aspect of grieving - realizing that we in many ways grieve the past, the present, and the future. This expands on a few things we talked about in the nonfinite grief episode, so make sure you catch that one too. We don't have ads or a patreon. What helps us most is if you join the WYG member community for grief education, connection, accountability, a grief book club & more. It is only $10/month and it is a big part of what keeps the podcast...
When Families Grieve Differently
November 01, 2022 14:46 - 29 minutes - 55.5 MBThis week we're answering a listener question about how to cope when the differences in family grief styles start to cause strain between family members. Join the WYG member community for grief education, connection, accountability, a grief book club & more. Plus, you can watch the live stream of us recording each week. $10/month and it is what keeps the podcast going - https://whats-your-grief-community.circle.so/ Our book is available anywhere you buy books: Amazon Barnes & N...
Nonfinite Grief (grieving the life you expected)
October 25, 2022 20:11 - 31 minutes - 58.6 MBIn this episode we talk about the little-discussed, but incredibly common experience of nonfinite grief. This is an experience that can happen after a death, but also after countless nondeath losses. Join the WYG member community for grief education, connection, accountability, a grief book club & more. Plus, you can watch the live stream of us recording each week. $10/month and it is what keeps the podcast going - https://whats-your-grief-community.circle.so/ Our book is available ...
When Grief Feels Ugly, Mean & Messy
October 17, 2022 02:59 - 29 minutes - 55.5 MBThis week we're discussing when and why grief can leave you with a mountain of ugly, mean, and messy feelings. Join the WYG member community for grief education, connection, accountability, a grief book club & more. Plus, you can watch the live stream of us recording each week. $10/month and it is what keeps the podcast going - https://whats-your-grief-community.circle.so/ Our book is available anywhere you buy books: Amazon Barnes & Noble Bookshop Books A Million Indie...
What's Your (Grief) Question
October 11, 2022 01:56 - 36 minutes - 68.7 MBYou've sent us your grief questions; we've done our best to share some answers. Or at least talk through some thoughts. How do you handle it when people make assumptions about your grief that are all wrong? How do you strengthen continued bonds? (And some rambling on sleep to boot). Join the WYG member community, where we have tons of grief education, support, connection, a book club. Plus, you can watch the live stream of us recording each week. $10/month and it is what keeps the podcast...
Do We Recover From Grief?
October 01, 2022 22:42 - 36 minutes - 27.8 MBIn this episode, Eleanor and Litsa talk about a question that has created some disagreement on social media recently: do we 'recover' from grief? Our book is available anywhere you buy books: Amazon Barnes & Noble Bookshop Books A Million Indiebound Hudson Booksellers Powell's Target To join the WYG member community, where we have tons of grief education, support, connection, a book club, and where you can watch the live stream of us recording and chat along - https:/...
Lists to Help You Through Any Loss
September 09, 2022 20:38 - 36 minutes - 69.1 MBOur book is available for pre-order (and you can even get a free digital download companion thank you here for pre-ordering). Order it today for delivery on the release date - September 27, 2022: Amazon Barnes & Noble Bookshop Books A Million Indiebound Hudson Booksellers Powell's Target Become a WYG member community, where we have tons of grief education, support, connection, a book club, and where you can watch the live stream of us recording and chat along -- https:/...
Everybody's Grieving for the Weekend
September 02, 2022 15:26 - 37 minutes - 71 MBOur book is available for pre-order here (with a free digital workbook download if you pre-order!) To join the WYG member community, where we have tons of grief education, support, connection, a book club, and where you can watch the live stream of us recording and chat along - https://whats-your-grief-community.circle.so/ As always, follow us on social Instagram Facebook Twitter Pinterest TikTok
All About Anger in Grief
August 26, 2022 12:19 - 43 minutes - 80.9 MBOur book is available for pre-order here (with a free digital workbook download if you pre-order!) To join the WYG member community, where we have tons of grief education, support, connection, a book club, and where you can watch the live stream of us recording and chat along - https://whats-your-grief-community.circle.so/ Read more articles about grief and anger here. As always, follow us on social Instagram Facebook Twitter Pinterest TikTok
Grief and the Passage of Time
August 19, 2022 15:06 - 40 minutes - 75.3 MBOur book is available for pre-order here (with a free digital workbook download if you pre-order!) To join the WYG member community, where we have tons of grief education, support, connection, a book club, and where you can watch the live stream of us recording and chat along - https://whats-your-grief-community.circle.so/ Read more articles about the passage of time As always, follow us on social Instagram Facebook Twitter Pinterest TikTok
Announcement: We're Back!
August 19, 2022 14:07 - 9 minutes - 17.6 MBNeedless to say, it's been a while! But we're back with an exciting announcement. To join the WYG member community, where we have tons of grief education, support, connection, a book club, and where you can watch the live stream of us recording and chat along - https://whats-your-grief-community.circle.so/ - As always, follow us on social Instagram Facebook Twitter Pinterest TikTok
Grief Hindsight
September 18, 2020 12:57 - 32 minutes - 45.3 MBAfter a death we do a lot of looking backwards. We think about what we should have known or done differently. We imagine a different world, and ideal world, if things had just taken another path. This becomes wound up in our grief - we beat ourselves up for the past based on things we can only know in the present. In this episode we talk through what that looks like, why we do it, and how to avoid getting sucked too far down the blackholes of counterfactual thinking and hindsight bias in gri...
Grief Expectations
September 01, 2020 13:49 - 33 minutes - 46.6 MBWhat we believe about grief often starts from a young age. We get messages from family, friends, community, and the media about what grief is 'supposed' to look like. Those messages become beliefs and those beliefs have a very real impact on the way we judge our grief (and often ourselves!). Today we're talking about the ins and outs - where to we get these ideas about grieving and how to they affect us?
Is Grief Ever 'On Hold'?
June 30, 2020 18:48 - 33 minutes - 45.9 MBTerms like delayed grief and absent grief get thrown around a lot. Recently, people have been suggesting that distancing may be putting people's grief 'on hold'. In this episode, we talk about whether grief is ever 'on hold', how external circumstances can have a very real impact on grieving, and why delayed grief can sometimes happen. Oh, and we do some musing about our own grief.
Grief Math and Other Musings
June 24, 2020 16:57 - 32 minutes - 44.9 MBIn this episode we ramble and reflect out loud a bit, so don't say we didn't warn you. Thinking about the ways grief has us doing mental math calculations up, down, and sideways. How old would he be now? She's been gone longer than we were married . . . How many more years until I am the age he was when he died? And on and on. Talking about grief math and the what-ifs and doing some personal processing of our own grieving as we go.
Positive Psychology, Grief, and PERMA
June 06, 2020 06:46 - 53 minutes - 72.8 MBThough positive psychology may sound like a field that is all about just thinking happy thoughts, nothing could be further from the truth. This well-researched, practical approach to boosting well-being is a WYG when it comes to grief and coping. In this episode we're talking about PERMA and challenging you to some momentum from the school of positive psychology.
A Lesson in Avoiding Avoidance
May 20, 2020 20:38 - 45 minutes - 62.3 MBWhen the world changes, the way we operate in the world has to change. Grief forces us to make new decisions about the things we do, the things we don't do, and how we cope. Today we talk about how so many of those decisions may feel good in the short term, but often don't serve us in the long-run. Avoidance sounds like it is obvious, but sometimes it hides in corners we don't even recognize.
In Grief, Is It Ever Too Late?
May 14, 2020 14:55 - 41 minutes - 56.4 MBWhen a lot of time has passed after a loss, we hear all sorts of questions - is it too late for counseling? Is it too late to reconnect with people I lost touch with? Is it too late to ask for stories and memories? We're pretty strong believers that, in grief, it is never too late.
7 Types of Grief and Loss to Know Right Now
May 08, 2020 15:03 - 40 minutes - 56 MBThere is a lot of discussion right now about the many ways people are experiencing grief - the grief of death related losses, but also many other types of grief that are coming up in the world. Today we're sorting through 7 types of grief we think may be relevant and impacting you right now.
Is It Ok To Talk To My Kids About My Dead Mom?
May 05, 2020 23:12 - 37 minutes - 51.4 MBWe received a question recently about talking to children about people who have died, especially those people the child never met. We get questions like this a lot. Is it normal? Is it okay? Will it screw up my kids? The quick answers: yes! yes! no! For the long answers, tune in.
Binge-Worthy Grief Movies and Television
May 01, 2020 15:21 - 47 minutes - 64.9 MBSeeing as a lot of us are spending more time at home than usual, we asked our readers/listeners for some of the best depictions of grief in movies and television. In this episode, we share your responses and our thoughts.
What's Your Grief Question?
April 22, 2020 20:26 - 35 minutes - 48.7 MBWe did an "Ask Us Anything" on Instagram and turns out your grief questions were a little too big to answer on Instagram. So today we are answering some of your pressing questions about grief - from widow dating to friends disappearing after a death, we're covering some tough topics in less than 35 minutes. Have a question you would like to see us cover? Email us at [email protected]
Grief in the Time of COVID-19
April 17, 2020 04:33 - 37 minutes - 51.7 MBWhether you were grieving before the coronavirus crisis or you've just lost a loved one and are navigating through the dark days of early grief, the current crisis is changing the way we grieve. We have heard from people all over the world and we've been touched personally, so it seemed about time to end our long hiatus to offer some observations, thoughts, and hopefully even support for everyone coping with grief right now (which just so happens to be a lot of us).
Navigating Social Media While Grieving
March 30, 2018 19:34 - 36 minutes - 66.6 MBWith over 150 million social media users in the US alone, we can no longer conceptualize grief support and support systems without considering online social interaction. As the co-founders of multiple online spaces, we believe online platforms provide grieving people with powerful tools for connecting and coping in the wake of loss. However, just like in real life, online spaces and interactions can, at times, be difficult to navigate. Intro by tom_luft (c) copyright 2011 Licensed under ...
Grief Themes in Pixar's Coco
March 20, 2018 23:34 - 30 minutes - 57 MBPixar must have a secret deal with Kleenex. They seemed determined to bring audiences to tears with every movie they make. This is fine by us, though, because these tender and relatable films make great teachable moments for children and adults alike. In this episode of the WYG podcast, we take a look at themes related to grief and death in Pixar's latest movie, Coco. Intro by tom_luft (c) copyright 2011 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution Noncommercial (3.0) license. http://di...