Don’t Be Bossy!

1 Peter 5:1-5 “To the elders among you, I appeal as a fellow elder and a witness of Christ’s sufferings who also will share in the glory to be revealed: Be shepherds of God’s flock that is under your care, watching over them—not because you must, but because you are willing, as God wants you to be; not pursuing dishonest gain, but eager to serve; not lording it over those entrusted to you, but being examples to the flock.  And when the Chief Shepherd appears, you will receive the crown of glory that will never fade away. In the same way, you who are younger submit yourselves to your elders. All of you clothe yourselves with humility toward one another because “God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.”

Most of us have people under our care, whether our children, grandchildren, brothers and sisters, moms and dads, friends, or family. We also have people who aren’t necessarily defined as those under our care, but they do fall within our circle of influence. The way Encounter Ministries has described it is that your circle of influence includes those people around you that you interact with on a somewhat regular basis. Those who look to you for direction. Those who, when they see how you are living, might want to make some changes in their own life as well. These verses give us some instruction on how we are to behave with those under our care or in our circle of influence.

The first thing it says is to watch over them not because we have to but because we want to. This can be hard sometimes if you have a loved one under your care that is difficult. It might not even be their fault that they are difficult. Maybe you are caring for an elderly parent they have dementia, and they are difficult, but it is not their fault. They don’t understand what is going on, and they don’t have the mental capacity to remember what you are saying. When this is the case, sometimes it can be hard to want to care for this person. Not because you don’t love them but because it is hard to see your loved ones in that state. You would rather remember them how they were before they got sick.

It can also be hard when you are a new mom and you have a baby that cries all the time. You love that baby with your whole heart, but sometimes you are caring for that baby because you have to, not because you want to. What you really want to do is get some sleep. This is similar to the last scenario because, in both cases, the person you are caring for didn’t really have a choice. They weren’t trying to be difficult, and yet they were still difficult. God is asking us for a perspective switch when this happens. He is asking us to change our mindset, so instead of thinking that we have to take care of our loved ones, think of it as we get to take care of them. As difficult as it is to take care of them, we will miss it when they are no longer here with us.

Peter reminds us in this letter that we are not to take care of people for false reasons. For instance, we shouldn’t take care of our parents or our loved ones because we expect something in return.  It also says we shouldn’t lord it over them, either. The message translations of this verse say, “Not bossily telling others what to do, but tenderly showing them the way.” I like that translation for two reasons. The first one is that it reminds us to be tender when we are caring for our loved ones. This can be especially important if we are dealing with our parents.

Our parents raised us, and they are used to being the ones to tell us what to do and doing everything for us. Then, as time goes by and they get older, they need to ask us to do things, or we may know how things work better. However, if we are bossy and tell them what they need to do, that doesn’t go over very well, and that doesn’t make them feel very good about themselves or about us. We need to be tender with them and not bossy.

The second reason I like that translation is that it reminds us to show them the way. Actually, the translation above is good for this reason too. It says to be an example. If we live our lives in a completely different manner than what we are saying to others, we wouldn’t be a very good example. It wouldn’t make sense to tell our children they are not allowed to do something and they we do it. It wouldn’t be good to tell our children to be kind to everyone they meet and then yell at the guy who cut us off in traffic and be rude to the person in the parking lot. Our words are important, but our actions are even more important.

The verses go on to say, “And when the Chief Shepherd appears, you will receive the crown of glory that will never fade away.” All of the things I said are good reminders and yet can be very hard. However, when we get to this line, I think it makes all that hard work worth it. Can you even imagine a crown of glory that never fades away? God never promised us that life in this world would be easy. He did promise us we wouldn’t ever be alone in it, though. When things get really difficult, we can lean into Him, and He will help us and support us. He will lift us up when we think we can’t make it any further. I heard the song “Strong” the other day by Anne Wilson. Two lines of the song have stuck in my head. “Lord knows I’ve tried, but I’m good at falling down. Thank God you’re good at picking me up off the ground.” God is good at picking you up off the ground too. Just ask Him!

The verses also remind those who are younger that they should submit themselves to their elders. Then I love this next part. All of you clothe yourselves with humility toward one another because “God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.” Humility is the key to all we do. If we are doing it with a humble heart, we will be doing it for the right reasons, and we will get it right. If we are doing it with a heart full of pride, it will be for all the wrong reasons, and we will get it wrong. God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble. This will go easier if you are a humble servant because God’s favor will be upon you. I feel like someone listening is really struggling with taking care of a parent whose health is declining, and I feel God wants you to know that you are doing a great job. Whether you are near or far, you are doing what you can. Just the fact that you are worried if you are doing enough shows how much you care.

Dear Heavenly Father, I ask you to bless all those listening to this episode today. Lord, help us to be a faithful, humble servant. Help us to take care of those in our care with gentleness. Help us to be tender examples and not be bossy or to lord our control over their hearts. Lord, help us serve for the right reasons. Purify us of any wrong reasons, Lord. We love you, and we want to do what is right in your eyes. Please help us! We ask all of this in accordance with your will and in Jesus’ holy name, Amen!

Thank you so much for joining me on this journey to walk boldly with Jesus. In my quest to help you walk more boldly with Jesus, I have started sending out a daily email that contains the words of prophecy that I put at the end of each episode. My goal for sharing the words of prophecy that the Lord is sharing with my praying group in Chelmsford is that the more you hear how the Lord is speaking to us, the more you will not only begin to recognize the Lord’s voice in your own life but also learn to recognize when it is not the Lord’s voice. If you would like to receive this daily email, you can Click Here or in the comments section, or you can email me at [email protected]. I look forward to meeting you here again tomorrow. Have a blessed day!

Today’s Word from the Lord is, “I watch over you. I protect you. I walk with you. I talk with you. You are my children, and I love you.”


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