The Sleep of Reason with Matt Lee

Fear. Disgust. Pity. The cripple evokes our basest human emotions—as does the monster.

Told in lyric fragments, The Backwards Hand traces Matt Lee’s experience living in the United States for more than thirty years with a rare congenital defect. Weaving in historical research and pop culture references, Lee dissects how the disabled body has been conflated with impurity, worthlessness, and evil. His voice swirls amid those of artists, criminals, activists, and philosophers. With a particular focus on horror films, Lee juxtaposes portrayals of fictitious monsters with the real-life atrocities of the Nazi regime and the American eugenics movement. Through examining his struggles with physical and mental health, Lee confronts his own beliefs about monstrosity and searches for atonement as he awaits the birth of his son.

The Backwards Hand interrogates what it means to be a cripple in a predominantly ableist society, deconstructing how perceptions of disability are—and are not—reflected in art and media.

In this episode with ⁠Matt Lee⁠, we explore the destabilizing effects of an acid experience, delve into Goya’s creation of his most otherworldly works after becoming deaf, and Tennessee Williams’s deep fear of asylums. We discuss the concept of self-imposed exile within the disabled community and dissect what truly makes a monster. We examine the works of photographers like Diane Arbus and Robert Andy Coombs. We also reflect on the limits of empathy, consider if we are the greatest source of danger to others, and confront childhood terrors and the complexities of fatherhood.

MATT LEE is the author of Crisis Actor. His short fiction and nonfiction have appeared in numerous venues online and in print. He has also written and produced work for the stage, including an adaptation of Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein. He is a cofounder and editor of the magazine Ligeia. Matt lives in Maryland with his wife and son.

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