Unbroken: Reclaiming Your Self After Childhood Trauma
38 episodes - English - Latest episode: about 2 years ago - ★★★★★ - 166 ratingsChildhood itself is a traumatic experience for most of us. Too many of us carry the scars into adulthood, and it impacts literally every aspect of our lives. We have felt, or been led to believe, that we are damaged, different, scarred, or somehow broken. This impacts our health, our relationships, our sense of "enoughness" and self-worth, and our ability to live a life of prosperity and peace.
The truth is, we have shown great courage to keep getting up and going day after day, year after year. What we have perceived as our biggest weakness is in fact our greatest strength.
As for me, my life changed when I realized 2 things: 1) There's only ever now. My only job is to attend to what is coming up in the present and the rest takes care of itself, and 2) It's not what happened to me, but the meaning I give it (i.e. the story I believed to make it make sense) that continues to cause the damage.
Join me on a journey as we band together to show the world that we are not the damaged, defective, or weak, but rather, we are the Unbroken.
Host: Pete Buecker
Community Site: WeAretheUnbroken.Com
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Episodes
"Honest Love"
February 25, 2022 17:20 - 3 minutes - 3.95 MBThis song is about looking into the eyes of unconditional love for the first time: the joy and pain of it. This is one just to listen to and see what it stirs in you. I really love this song. To Follow/Contact me or to hear more: Instagram @bullshivamusic Facebook @bullshivamusic YouTube "Bullshiva" email: [email protected] or [email protected]
"Hollow Trace"
February 25, 2022 17:15 - 4 minutes - 4.86 MBThis is a song that really chronicles my healing journey as I've shared it in Unbroken. I literally wrote this in its full form in one sitting which is unusual, and it happened the night I came home from a 12-step meeting and the full impact of my journey through life to that point really hit. The end sum of it is, despite the trauma, the years of sexual abuse, the heartache of growing up torn between parents, the pain I caused myself and others along the way, I wouldn't change a minute of it...
Unbroken Show Finale
February 25, 2022 05:00 - 33 minutes - 38 MBWell, my friends what a beautiful and interesting journey it has been. I have thought about you and this show and this journey literally every day since it began. I feel at this time it's time to put a book end on this show and pivot toward what I see as the next step in my path as being a bigger force of love in this world. My goal has been to leave a clear cut path to healing for anyone who lands on this show, and I feel I've done that. In this episode, I leave you with the 3 take home poin...
Can You See My Scars? Interview with burn survivor, author, & activist Samuel Moore-Sobel
October 27, 2020 18:00 - 51 minutes - 46.8 MBSamuel Moore-Sobel is an author, speaker, and all around good guy. At 15 years of age, he sustained chemical burns to his face and arms that have sent him on a roller coaster ride for 11 years. His book Can You See My Scars? tells the tale, and more importantly, chronicles his own personal healing journey. It was a delight to speak with him, and I am excited to share it with you here! https://mascotbooks.com/mascot-marketplace/buy-books/nonfiction/bios-and-memoirs/can-you-see-my...
Rise Up From Ash: Overcoming (Narcissistic) Abuse - Interview with Peyton Turner
October 20, 2020 18:00 - 40 minutes - 36.8 MBPeyton Turner is a cardiac PA turned healing and intuition coach for women. You can find out more about Peyton at https://peytonhturner.com/ (PeytonHTurner.com.) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B086DWLZLS?ref_=pe_3052080_276849420&pldnSite=1 (CLICK HERE) to order Rise Up From Ash: Follow Your Intuition, Save Your Life If you'd like to reach out to Peyton directly, CLICK HERE TO EMAIL PEYTON. Access all episodes, reach out to Pete, and learn more about the program and its mission at http...
The Ugliest Word: Interview with Author and Activist Annie Margis
October 15, 2020 17:22 - 30 minutes - 27.8 MBHelp me celebrate Annie Margis and her devotion to speaking out about childhood incest and abuse. https://www.amazon.com/Ugliest-Word-Annie-Margis/dp/1734752807/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1602522775&sr=1-1 (**Buy The Ugliest Word right now by clicking here**) -Drop Annie a note and let her know what this interview and her book meant to you Here. -Sign Annie's petition to end the taboo of talking about childhood incest by https://www.change.org/p/allies-let-s-dissolve-the...
VISAGE Step 6: Evolve
October 13, 2020 18:00 - 25 minutes - 23 MBLinks: Access all episodes, reach out to Pete, and learn more about the program and its mission at https://unbroken.fm (https://unbroken.fm) https://www.amazon.com/Everything-Belongs-Gift-Contemplative-Prayer/dp/0824519957 (Everything Belongs, by Richard Rohr - )Great book on contemplative prayer WHAT TO DO NEXT If you like what you hear, CLICK SUBSCRIBE and let’s do this together! Also, if you would, LEAVE A REVIEW so others just like you can find this show and benefit as well. A...
VISAGE Step 5: Grow (Bringing Balance to "the 3 Conflicts")
October 06, 2020 18:00 - 35 minutes - 32.4 MBLinks: Access all episodes at https://unbroken.fm (https://Unbroken.fm) CLICK HERE to Email Pete directly WHAT TO DO NEXT If you like what you hear, CLICK SUBSCRIBE and let’s do this together! Also, if you would, LEAVE A REVIEW so others just like you can find this show and benefit as well. DM me on Instagram: @Pete_IS_Unbroken Oh, and don’t forget to https://www.facebook.com/groups/WeAretheUnbroken (JOIN THE PRIVATE “WE ARE THE UNBROKEN” FACEBOOK GROUP!) Thanks so much for listenin...
VISAGE Step 4: Align Your Mind
September 29, 2020 18:00 - 37 minutes - 34.2 MBLinks: Access all episodes at https://unbroken.fm (https://Unbroken.fm) CLICK HERE to Email Pete directly https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Five_whys (The 5 Why's (first used within the Toyota corporation) ) FTSB (5 point inquiry) - Pete's version Feeling Trigger Story Belief Get to the Truth! WHAT TO DO NEXT If you like what you hear, CLICK SUBSCRIBE and let’s do this together! Also, if you would, LEAVE A REVIEW so others just like you can find this show and benefit as well. Also...
VISAGE Step 4: Align Your Relationships
September 29, 2020 18:00 - 33 minutes - 30.4 MBLinks: Access all episodes at https://unbroken.fm (https://Unbroken.fm) CLICK HERE to Email Pete directly https://www.amazon.com/Facing-Love-Addiction-Giving-Yourself/dp/0062506048/ref=sr_1_3?dchild=1&keywords=pia+mellody&qid=1601341103&sr=8-3 (Pia Mellody: Facing Love Addiction - )A great book that explains a problem you never knew you had until now and how to fix it. WHAT TO DO NEXT If you like what you hear, CLICK SUBSCRIBE and let’s do this together! Also, if you would, LEAVE A...
VISAGE Step 4: Align (Understanding the 6 Desires of Your True Self)
September 29, 2020 18:00 - 46 minutes - 42.2 MBLinks: Access all episodes at https://unbroken.fm (https://Unbroken.fm) CLICK HERE to Email Pete directly WHAT TO DO NEXT If you like what you hear, CLICK SUBSCRIBE and let’s do this together! Also, if you would, LEAVE A REVIEW so others just like you can find this show and benefit as well. Follow Pete on Instagram (or drop a DM): @pete_is_unbroken Oh, and don’t forget to https://www.facebook.com/groups/WeAretheUnbroken (JOIN THE PRIVATE “WE ARE THE UNBROKEN” FACEBOOK GROUP!) Than...
VISAGE Step 3: The Shift
September 22, 2020 18:00 - 32 minutes - 29.5 MBLinks: Access all episodes at https://unbroken.fm (https://Unbroken.fm) WHAT TO DO NEXT If you like what you hear, SUBSCRIBE to the show, and let’s do this together! Also, if you would, LEAVE A REVIEW so others just like you can find this show and benefit as well. Also, feel free to EMAIL ME DIRECTLY to dive deeper or to share your own thoughts and questions about what you are hearing here. Oh, and don’t forget to https://www.facebook.com/groups/WeAretheUnbroken (JOIN THE PRIVATE “W...
VISAGE Step 2: Identify Your Brokenness Belief
September 15, 2020 18:00 - 30 minutes - 28 MBLinks: Access all episodes, reach out to Pete, and learn more about the program and its mission at https://unbroken.fm (https://Unbroken.fm) WHAT TO DO NEXT If you like what you hear, CLICK SUBSCRIBE and let’s do this together! Also, if you would, LEAVE A REVIEW so others just like you can find this show and benefit as well. Also, feel free to email me directly if you'd like to go deeper or ask questions about what you are hearing on the show. Oh, and don’t forget to https://www.fa...
VISAGE Step 1: Visualize (Meeting Your True Self)
September 08, 2020 21:40 - 30 minutes - 28 MBLinks: Access all episodes at https://unbroken.fm (https://Unbroken.fm) WHAT TO DO NEXT If you like what you hear, CLICK SUBSCRIBE and let’s do this together! Also, if you would, LEAVE A REVIEW so others just like you can find this show and benefit as well. Oh, and don’t forget to https://www.facebook.com/groups/WeAretheUnbroken (JOIN THE PRIVATE “WE ARE THE UNBROKEN” FACEBOOK GROUP!) Or EMAIL ME DIRECTLY by CLICKING HERE Thanks so much for listening! Your support means the world to...
6 Steps to Inner Freedom: Overview of the VISAGE Process
September 01, 2020 18:00 - 38 minutes - 35 MBIn this episode, I wanted to give the overview of the process I am about to share with you over the next several episodes. It may seem like a lot, but as you will see, each step follows naturally from the one preceding it. I am excited to share this with you! This 6-step process that I call VISAGE (the acronym that contains the 6 steps) was developed as a result of my time in the medical world, my PhD study in Mind-Body Medicine, and mostly from my own healing journey through thera...
The 6 Components of Healing: A 10,000 Foot View
August 25, 2020 18:00 - 31 minutes - 28.4 MBRegardless of what you are doing to heal your hurts in life, true healing only happens when you experience a shift inside. The chief “symptoms” of having successfully made the shift are feeling calm, confident, and content inside your own skin. In this episode, I lay out what I see as the 6 overarching components of reclaiming your self, which of course is very much the centerpiece of the show. Links: Access all episodes, reach out to Pete, and learn more about the program and its ...
Redefining Healing: Setting the Stage for the Journey Home to Freedom
August 18, 2020 18:00 - 22 minutes - 20.3 MBAs we turn our attention to a specific path of healing, we need to define what healing really is. In this episode, I set the stage for where we are going over these next several episodes, and offer a new, more practical definition of “healing” that really sets the stage for the work we are about to do together. Yes, healing is about returning to a state or experience of wholeness given whatever it is that you are healing from. But, this definition never really worked for me in a p...
Special Announcement from Pete
August 11, 2020 18:08 - 5 minutes - 4.99 MBIf you'd like to follow or message me, you can find me on Instagram @Pete_Is_Unbroken Thanks and see you soon!
The 3 Things Every Unbroken Should Know: Your Ticket to Freedom
April 25, 2020 19:20 - 25 minutes - 23.1 MBIn my own experience and in working with a number of clients helping them overcome the ravages of early life trauma, drama, and dysfunction, there are 3 things we all seem to have in common linking our past to our present. When you understand this for what it is, and how it works, the path to freedom starts to lay itself out before you. See what you think and reach out if you have questions! LINKS: Here's the book I referenced in this episode, a game changer for me! https://www.ama...
Feeling Stuck in Your Life? Here is What to Pay Attention to to Get Free
February 27, 2020 21:44 - 28 minutes - 26.5 MBLiving a life of freedom and peace is available to each of us. But, there are forces in our own lives and our own minds that keep us blocked or stuck. In this episode, I share with you one of the most powerful concepts I have come across to help me navigate relationships, work dynamics, finances, parenting, relationship with my family, and basically all aspects of my life. If you understand the one simple dynamic that I talk about in this show and put it to work for you in your ow...
Detoxifying Your Relationships: How to Shift from Drama and Conflict to Love, Honesty, & Respect
February 19, 2020 05:12 - 33 minutes - 30.9 MBFew places will trigger us more than our relationships. If you are living with drama and conflict in your life, you are repeatedly playing one of 3 roles in your relationships, and inviting others to play the other roles. These dynamics disempower all parties, and feel draining and exhausting. But, there is a healthier, more peaceful way. In this episode, I share with you some very simple, practical, and powerful ways to understand relationship dynamics and how to keep yourself ou...
The #1 Most Overlooked Component of Healing & How to Put it to Work in Your Life Today
February 11, 2020 16:39 - 29 minutes - 27.4 MBOne of the key features of early life trauma is being overly harsh and self-critical. I always say that the voice inside our own heads is usually the biggest a-hole we encounter during a given day. Few things ramp it up into high gear like being triggered into our brokenness thoughts and feelings. But, when this happens, we are only heaping more pain on top of existing pain. It's what our abusers did to us, and we continue the cycle internally. What I show you in this episode is ...
The #1 Problem We All Share & Why I Think It's Ultimately a Good Thing
February 05, 2020 16:47 - 33 minutes - 30.5 MBThe legacy of early life trauma is a painful one. Whether you were overtly physically or sexually abused, were raised by unpleasable or alcoholic parents, were bullied, berated, or shamed by teachers, preachers, or classmates, there is 1 fundamental problem that we as the Unbroken share. It is the source of the vast majority, if not all, of your suffering to this day. It is for most of us the final hurdle to be navigated to finding freedom from the pain. In this episode, I tell you...
Triggers, Rabbit Holes, & Cages Wide Open: How We Get Stuck, and How to Get Out
January 29, 2020 06:13 - 36 minutes - 33.6 MBWhat do we mean when we say "I am triggered?" What does it mean to be "down a rabbit hole?" I break it down for you here. In this episode, you will learn why triggers happen, what you feel when they do, why you feel what you do when they happen, and how to start to disempower them. One thing I didn't mention explicitly in the episode is that our "triggers" often represent one of two things (or both): Unhealed emotional wounds from the past Feelings related to our "brokenness" or "n...
Your Depression & Anxiety is NOT Mental Illness, It's Actually Quite the Opposite
January 21, 2020 21:01 - 35 minutes - 32.4 MBIt is often said that we are living in a crisis of mental health. But, this couldn’t be further from the truth. Look at your own life. If you are anxious, depressed, stressed, or overwhelmed, is it because you are unable to understand your life circumstances, emotions, or consequences of your actions or the consequences of others’ actions upon you? No. The problem is quite the opposite. The problem is that you are painfully aware of how you feel, what you think about, what the...
How to Overcome Shame in Dating and Relationships with Coach Mark Sing
January 16, 2020 19:05 - 33 minutes - 30.8 MBCoach Mark Sing is the host of The Unapologetic Man podcast. He is a dating coach who uses a process called Neurolinguistic Programming (NLP) to help men overcome their shame-based anxiety about approaching people of romantic interest. In short, NLP helps re-wire deeper mental programming that, at least in part, determines the experiences you have and choices you make. While Coach Mark works predominantly with men, this programming is, of course, universal to all gender orienta...
How Your Mind Works & What to Do With It
January 07, 2020 21:46 - 34 minutes - 31.9 MBIn many ways, the quality of your life, health, and relationships hinges on what is happening in your mind. In this episode, Pete lays out an easy to follow metaphor of how your mind actually works. Once you understand this, your ability to interact with your own mind skillfully will increase significantly. This allows you to have a say in what your mind is thinking about, how it is getting triggered, how you react to the people and events of your life, and how you engage in relati...
Why Are You Settling for Anything Less Than the Exact Life You Want?
December 31, 2019 16:45 - 35 minutes - 32.9 MBMost of us Unbrokens find ourselves living lives marked by stress, anxiety, depression, and feeling alone, isolated, or different. We wind up recreating the toxicity and abuse of our childhoods in some attempt by our own psyche to heal or correct the damage. But, experience tells us that it doesn't work this way. Yet, we still do it. The question is why? In this episode Pete lays out the 3 main reasons you are settling for anything less than the exact life you want and what to do...
Rising Up Unbroken: Finding Freedom From the Fire
December 24, 2019 16:25 - 32 minutes - 30.1 MBWe didn’t have a choice of whether or not to be traumatized, abused, bullied, or whatever happened to you that led you here. But, we do have a choice of what to do now. There is great freedom available if you understand what it is and how to discover it. For three decades I believed that there was some life people lived that I didn’t get to have because of the trauma and abuse I sustained as a kid. I fell for the “if only” beliefs: If only I had had a “normal” family growing up; ...
Understanding Your Emotions: What They Are, Where They Come From, and What to Do With Them
December 17, 2019 21:00 - 33 minutes - 30.9 MBEmotions are an important part of our physical makeup. We often think of them as inconvenient or that we can just ignore or push them away, but nothing could be further from the truth. The word “emotion” refers to energy in motion. They are a critical part of our existence, and contribute heavily to our states of health and disease. Additionally, they give us important clues as to how aligned we are with the truth of who we are in our core. You can catalog the whole of your emotio...
What Stress, Anxiety, & Depression Really Are...And What You Can Do About Them
December 09, 2019 22:00 - 5 seconds - 27.2 MBWe are seeing an alarming rise in diagnosis of and prescriptions for anxiety and depression. Even more concerning is that this is happening in younger and younger people. Throw in the impact that chronic stress, anxiety, and depression have on most of today’s most common health issues, then the epidemic proportion of the issue comes easily into sight. It is not my belief that more and more people are just prone to these conditions. While many may have genetic predisposition for anxi...
The 4 Brokenness Beliefs and How Yours is Affecting You Right Now
December 03, 2019 21:00 - 34 minutes - 32 MBAs a child, you were egocentric. If you were being neglected, abused, or emotionally manipulated to meet the needs of your caregivers, you crafted a story in your little kid mind to help you make sense of the situation. This story involves you as being the source of the problem, because that’s the assumption that lets you feel the most safe and secure. This is the source of our sense of brokenness. In my experience, these stories take one of a few predictable forms which I go through...
Becoming You: Understanding Your 2 Selves
November 26, 2019 18:25 - 35 minutes - 32.6 MBWhen you are a baby, you just are. You are life incarnate. You have no idea there is any other way to be. And then we start to become social. We learn in our early home environment that me exactly as I am isn’t going to get it done. We then start adapting ourselves to meet the demands of this environment by creating an alternate, or false, self (i.e. the ego). The ego is a fear-based survival tool. Unfortunately, most things we do to feel better in life serve, bolster, or add more an...
The Root of the "Mental Health Crisis" in America
November 19, 2019 22:00 - 35 minutes - 32.4 MBIn this episode, I lay out his argument for the real source of what we are witnessing as an alarming rise in rates of anxiety, depression, addiction, many common health conditions, career burnout, and suicide, particularly among younger and younger people. The problem is systemic and spread through all sectors of our society. But, it is not insurmountable. In fact, there are small steps we each can take to make a huge dent in it. Things have gone too far, and it's time for a c...
Here is the Only Place You Could Ever Be
November 15, 2019 03:57 - 28 minutes - 26.2 MBIt has long been said that there is no time like the present. This is true, but not for the reason most people think. It’s true because there is no time other than the present...ever. In fact, every moment of your life just feels like “now.” This is the first part of your ticket to freedom. See, being traumatized is like putting your hand on a hot stove burner. If you get your hand off the burner, but never put it on ice or under cold water, the burning continues long after the ha...
Yours is the Face of Courage
November 12, 2019 08:37 - 29 minutes - 27.3 MBThe definition of courage is not lack of fear, rather doing what needs to be done in the face of that fear. This is what we Unbrokens do EVERY day. For some, it’s walking into a home, school, or other environment where danger constantly lurked. For others, you were treated pretty well, but felt like you had to be someone else, or just generally like an impostor or fraud. Whatever it is, the fact is you keep showing up and living life, even in the face of these feelings and this unc...
Welcome & The Unmistakable Symptoms of Childhood Trauma & Family Dysfunction
November 12, 2019 08:14 - 14 minutes - 13.3 MBThis first episode features straight-talk from Pete on who this is show is and isn’t for. Whether or not you have a specific history of trauma, often times family dysfunction gets internalized the same way. Certain “symptoms” are pretty universal among humans: People-pleasing, feeling like you’re “not enough,” setting poor personal boundaries, feeling like you are not worth the love, money, etc. that you want, being harshly self-critical or perfectionistic, difficulty sharing feeli...
Do I Really Have to Love Myself First?
November 12, 2019 04:40 - 30 minutes - 27.9 MBIronically, self-love is one of the greatest hills we climb as humans. We are born whole, then learn along the way that we are unacceptable. This leads us to feel like we have to act a certain way, or shove certain parts of us under the rug to be accepted and ultimately, loved. The #1 barrier for most of us Unbrokens to really loving and being loved is the experience of or the avoidance of… Shame. Shame is the emotional reaction to the belief that “something is wrong with me” or ...