T19 - El Paso, Texas & Dayton, Ohio

We talk about our reaction to the shootings in El Paso, Texas and Dayton, Ohio where many lost their lives and where countless others were injured. 

We remember the families of those affected and those who have lost loved ones, our heart goes out to you. 

News about shootings: 

NPR Up First - https://www.npr.org/2019/08/05/748165528/monday-august-5th-2019

The Daily Times - https://podcasts.google.com/?feed=aHR0cHM6Ly9yc3MuYXJ0MTkuY29tL3RoZS1kYWlseQ&episode=Z2lkOi8vYXJ0MTktZXBpc29kZS1sb2NhdG9yL1YwL3I5YjJTWXRweTVfRThhUGZqdW40b1BpVmVPaElEbHRzd0ttbEcwYXF5czQ&at=1565061632918

What is empathy illustrated video by Brené Brown: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Evwgu369Jw

Anniella Rigacci (Sebastian's Cousin) Post on Facebook:

There is not a right or wrong way to react or respond during a traumatic event or crisis. People respond/react in different ways. In the midst of a trauma or crisis, it is not appropriate nor is it helpful to tell someone how they should react or respond to what is happening. “Just pray about it” or “God has a plan” is not helpful at this time. “You should do this... instead of this...” is not helpful at this time. This can create cognitive distortions. Someone that is experiencing a traumatic event or crisis, someone being triggered by a secondary traumatic event, someone experiencing vicarious trauma... is in a high stress/emotional state and is most likely unable to think logically or rationally, nor should they have to. What is most helpful is connecting with them emotionally, connecting with their right brain. Empathy is extremely important during this time. Take deep breaths with them. You don’t even have to say many words when you are empathizing. “I am here, I am with you, I see you, I hear you.”

Traumatic events are happening all around us. People are angry, hurt, depressed, anxious, paranoid... they want to blame someone or blame themselves for what is happening. These are thoughts and feelings that are normal, and feelings people are allowed to feel and process. Telling someone to not think or feel is counterproductive. It does not matter if you agree with their thoughts or feelings at this time. You can try to have a logical, rational conversation with them at another time. Everyone has the right to their own processing and healing of traumatic events. If empathy is hard for you, due to your own thoughts, feelings, and reactions, I would recommend giving yourself space, giving people space, staying away from social media or news outlets, especially during breaking news events, because they can be extremely triggering.

To anyone going through a crisis and/or experiencing any symptoms of trauma... I am here, I am with you, I hear you, I see you.

Check out our episode in Youtube here: https://youtu.be/B6h3sZU-RM0

Find our show notes here: https://trendingup.wixsite.com/podcast/episode-notes