Tales From The Warmaster

Episode 35 - Badab to the Bone - The Time of Ending 13

We continue our headfirst plunge into the Badab War and the struggle for control of the Maelstrom Zone. As new Loyalist forces enter the battlezone, the Tyrant’s control of the sector hangs by a thread, and our crew still isn’t certain which side to hope wins. Highlights: Lygers in Space! Stibor 'Still Bitter' Lazearek Passed Over Again! Metric to Imperial Conversion Confusion! Secrets of the Astral Claws Revealed! Become our Patron for exclusive, hot off the presses content and logo brand...

Ep 34 - I’m Badab! I’m Badab, Y’know It (Huron!) Alright!? - The Time of Ending 12

The Crew continues to dissect and discuss the events leading to the unfortunate little incident in the Maelstrom Zone. Imperial Authorities enter the Frain as the Inquisition decides to investigate the hullabaloo surrounding the rise of the Tyrant of Badab, and the inflexible monsters who forced him to tighten his grip upon the Maelstrom Zone, lest it slip into the control of far more terrible beings than himself.  Highlights The Heretic Beach Patrol! Turtle Soup for the Soul! Laezerak Bisc...

Episode 33 - The Muffin Man Who Lives on Maelstrom Lane - The Time of Ending 11

The Heretic Crew continues investigations into the Badab Situation in an attempt to answer the age old question, passed down by oral tradition for generations: Do you know the muffin man, The muffin man, the muffin man. Do you know the muffin man, Who lives on Maelstrom Lane? Highlights Include: Waste Disposal of the Far Future! The Tyrant of Badab Puts the System on Trial! Cackling Jackals In Space! Disasters in Muffin Shipping! Become our Patron for exclusive content and super-sic...

Ep 32 - Badab Moon Rising - The Time of Ending 10

Our Historian Extraordinaire, Ian, Takes the Rest of the Heretical Crew through the actions that would eventually lead to the rise of one of the most wicked Badabasses in the entire 41st Millennium, Lugft Huron. We Slip and Slide Our Way Through the Maelstrom, Second Only to The Eye of Terror in it’s Warp-Riftitude.  Highlights Include: The Spice Must Flow Astartes Accountabilibuddies Epic Duels Tyrant’s Legion... Assemble! Become our Patron for exclusive content and super-sick rewards...

Episode 31 - Post Vraks Enema - The Time of Ending 9

The Heretic Crew skims across the fifty years following the conclusion of the Vraktuckian Derby, mercifully light on trenches and bombardments. We revisit our old friends the Tau, Tyranids and Imperial Guard as we explore some of the more exciting moments of the late 41st millennium.  Highlights Heresy of the Cylliast Saint Somehow Still Horse Jokes Blood Orgy at the Atomic Horne Horsing Around With Tyranids n Tau Fourth Degree Warp Fuckery vs. Cadians

Episode 30 - Siege of Vraks VII: Six Years and Four Hundred and Seventy Two Episodes Late - The Time of Ending 8

The Vracktuckian Derby finally finishes as the Heretic Crew begrudgingly examine the final phases for the battle of the Vraks. Hearts are broken, spirits are crushed, and the Citadel finally succumbs, not to the unending bombardments and waves of Krieg infantry, but to a targeted strike by the Adeptus Astartes and Inquisitor Rex. Highlights Include: The Death Korp Gets a Break! A Surprise Demonic Cameo! A Crack in The Universe! Shockingly Poor Record Keeping! Become our Patron for excl...

Episode 29 - Siege of Vraks VI: Psychic Old Ass Dudes - The Time of Ending 7

The Crew continues tunneling through the thick mud and stone of the Siege of Vraks, the end in sight just beyond the meters thick wall of stagnant horse jokes and broken shovels. As one would expect, as the war draws to a close, the forces of Krieg become increasingly less relevant to the overall struggle, giving the glory all to the Space Marines! Highlights Landraider Demolition Derby! Horse to Drop Pod Ratios Revealed! Ang’Grath, Tour Guide of the Realm of Khorne Arrives! Cybernetic ...

March Special Episode - Best of Patreon - Exclusive Content Preview

This month's special is a preview of our Patreon Exclusive offshoot, Tales From The Internet, where we read top quality Fan-Fiction from the internet out loud to each other, with two rules: We only pre-read the first paragraph, and we read it exactly as written.  First up we have Storytime with Scott, as the rest of the Crew is subjected to the inane rambling of FlamingHunter, enhanced with patented "Reel-Tyme Ef-X" technology. Hands across America with Demons, there's really nothing more t...

Ep 28 - Siege of Vraks V: One Trick Pony - The Time of Ending 6

Our Heretical Historian Crew charges across the Impassable Craters (™) that constitute the Vraks Storyline, using the corpses of the Horses that have fallen to form a literary bridge. Horse Skulls are added to thrones, Clone Blood is rendered unto Dark Gods, and uh…. Much needed supply lines of Commissioned Libations are broken.  Highlights Vraksian Mimosa Shortage! Deep Pit Resignations ! Sorrowful Communications! Revising Strategies, Without Revisions! Marginally Less Horse Jokes!

Ep 27 - Siege of Vraks IV: Mai-Tais, Mimosas and Math - The Time of Ending 5

Our Heretical Historian Crew rides across the blood-strewn mud pit of Vraks on their newly acquired Cybernetic Horses. Unrelated to the three missing Vraksian Derby stallions. You already know what's coming: Mud, Trenches, Shovels, Something About Tunneling…  and Horse Jokes. Lots of Horse Jokes. Highlights A Lengthy Discussion of The Definition of “The Start”  The Parable of the Red Scorpions and The Old Ones (Somehow) Red Scorpions Ain’t Got Time To Bleed You Can Lead A Horse To Mimos...

Ep 26 - Siege of Vraks III: Flogging A Dead Horse - The Time of Ending 4

Our Heretical Historian Crew continues our slog through the knee deep mud pit commonly known as Vraks. Deadlines are ignored, casualties are counted, and strategies are repeated ad nauseum. The war enters a new theater as Krieg command devises a nefarious new strategy: Trenches with roofs.  Highlights: Horses.  That’s it.  That’s the highlight.  Horses. Robot Horses. Seabiscuit. Yay. Become our Patron for exclusive content and early access to Specials! https://www.patreon.com/WarmasterPo...

Ep 25 - Siege of Vraks II: Foxholes and Failure - The Time of Ending 3

Continuing with the detailed account of this conflict outside of time, the Siege of Vraks, the Heretical Historian crew examines whether the claims that Adeptus Astartes couldn’t be effective in this war were in fact true. Azrael of the Dark Angels has strong opinions on the matter, which he expresses rather explosively. Join Ian, Scott and Max as they trudge through the corpse strewn trenches of what desperately wants to escape it’s fate as a Science Fiction conflict! Highlights Include: ...

Ep 24 - The Siege of Vraks: Ham-fisted Historicalism - The Time of Ending 2

The Heretical Historian team dives deep into the ham tinted waters of the Siege of Vraks, barely keeping their heads above the trench-foot flavored waters of poor reference choices. Scott and Max provide covering fire as our Historian Majeure, Ian, crosses the no-man’s land of referential minefields that is the Siege of Vraks. Highlights Include: Scaling Issues of the 41st Millennium Revealed! Ham-fisted WWI References! The Subtlety of a Thrown Brick, in Writing! Even More Ham-Fisted WW...

Valentine's Day Special: Waaagh! Is Love

Our Heretical Historian Crew scoured the Grim Darkness of the far future in search of truth, love and beauty and all we found was this Valentine's Day Card.  Speed Freaks Are Red Death Skulls Are Blue This Season of Fire I Burn for You -Commissar Yarrick, Probably Follow along with Ian, Scott and Max as we discuss the Star Crossed Lovers, Commissar Sebastian Yarrick and Ghazghkull Mag Uruk Thraka, a rare example of xeno-compatible romance in the Far Future! Become our Patron for exclusiv...

Ep 23 - Planet Tyran, a Small Zombie, Dead Gods and a Cardinal - The Time of Ending 1

The Heretical Historian, Ian, leads his compatriots Scott and Max through the stories of the opening years of the Time of Ending. Zombie Plagues, Aeldari Pirates, Awakening Tomb Worlds and a Renegade Cardinal set the stage as we enter into a period of rapid decline as the gnawing teeth of mankind’s enemies begin tearing at the bloated and rotting corpse of the Imperium.  Highlights Include: Star-killing Aeldari Pirates! Popping Pustules of Pestilential Poxes! Angry Brunch Eating Robots o...

Ep 22 - Solar Macharius: The Crusade to Heresy Pipeline - The Waning 4

Our Heretical Historian Ian, and his unwilling crewmates, Scott and Max, embark on an unofficially official deep dive into the Macharian Crusade, led by the most ass-kicking unmodified human in the Imperium (at least until the birth of Commissar Yarrick!), Lord Solar Macharius. The Macharian Crusade claimed a thousand worlds in a manner of a few years, making our claim of badassitude for the Lord Solar completely indisputable. Highlights Include: Investigating the Tomb of the Vagrant! Mac...

Ep 21 - The Gothic War 2: Blackstone Bonanza - The Waning 3

Our heretical historian, Ian, leads Scott and Max through the convoluted events and happenings of the back end of the Gothic War. Orks and Aeldari join in on the fun as the war wears on across the sector as Abaddon continues his campaign of destruction across the Gothic Sector.  Highlights Include: Pirates! Pirates Everywhere! Admiral Ravensburg On The Attack! The Power of the Blackstone Fortresses Revealed! Aeldari and Imperial Collusion! Victorious Retreat! Become our Patron for exc...

Episode 20 - Party on Wayne! Party on Goth(ic War)! - The Waning 2

Our Heretical historian crew tackles the winding story of Inquisitor Horst’s inept investigation into the rising forces of Chaos near the Eye of Terror during the build up to Abaddon’s Twelfth Black Crusade. Unlike the other Black Crusades, this one is recorded in detail by Imperial Scribes and can be explained and explorified more betterer than the other ones! Highlights Include Detailed Examinations on the Nature of Despoiling! Another Nifty Quote to Kick Things Off! Ancient Alien Arti...

Episode 20 - Party on Wayne! Party on Goth(ic War)! - The Gothic War 1

Our Heretical historian crew tackles the winding story of Inquisitor Horst’s inept investigation into the rising forces of Chaos near the Eye of Terror during the build up to Abaddon’s Twelfth Black Crusade. Unlike the other Black Crusades, this one is recorded in detail by Imperial Scribes and can be explained and explorified more betterer than the other ones! Highlights Include Detailed Examinations on the Nature of Despoiling! Another Nifty Quote to Kick Things Off! Ancient Alien Arti...

Ep 19 - Wayne’s World 40k: The Wayning - The Waning 1

Episode 19 - Wayne’s World 40k: The Wayning - The Waning 1 The Heretical Historian Crew skips around the Wayne-ing era of the Imperium with their new fangled Warp-Skipper, courtesy of those pesky T’au! Everything from Abbadon’s repeated Black Crusades to Inquisitorial enthusiasm decimates the Imperium’s worlds, all the while prophecies of the End Times begin to appear across the Imperium.  Highlights Include: System Purges and Sorcerous Rituals! The Children’s Crusade Strikes Back! Per...

Ep 18 - The T'au Podcaste

The Heretical Historian team tackles the origins of the up and comers of the universe, the T’au!  Water. Earth. Fire. Air. Long ago, the four tribes lived together in harmony, and everything was Good. Then everything changed when the Fire Tribe attacked. Only the Ethereal, master of all four elements, could stop them, so they appeared everywhere when everyone needed them. They have a lot to learn before they can save everyone, but I believe they can make the Greater Good! Highlights Includ...

New Year’s Special: New Legion, Who Dis? - The Old IXth Legion 2

In Celebration of the holy orb of Terra making another revolution around the holy Sol star, we bring to you the Newly Re-branded and reimagined IXth Legionnes Astartes, The Blood Angels! The Heretical Historian crew surfaces from the charnel pits of the early IXth Legion history and emerges into the bright, sparkly future of the Horus Heresy! Highlights Include: Slam-Dunk Contest of Angels! Aggressively Angelic Propaganda Campaigns! The Fate of Every Favorite Fabulous Hawk Boy Re-Iterate...

EP 17 - Al Dente Soup (Is Good Food) - The Age of Redemption

The Heretical Historian and team investigate the repercussions and changes to the Imperium in wake of Goge Vandire and Sebastian Thor’s struggles for the soul of the Minestrone. Fanaticism, Flagellation and Frontier expansion define the early era, only to be hit by the Warp Storm of Fun and Debauchery, Dionys! Highlights Include: The Taint of Chaos Revealed! Good Works Crusades! The Basilliest Saint Ever! The Winking Eye of Chaos! Become our Patron for exclusive content and early access t...

Podcast of Sanguinalia Past - The Old IXth Legion

Merry Sanguinalia to all, and to all a good fight!  Our Heretical Historian team decks the halls with the stolen Wraithbones, checks the Emprah's list twice, and dives headlong in the churning gore pits of the IXth Legionnes Astartes: The Eaters of the Dead! Are they Angels? Demons? Vampyrs? Come find out on our latest, Very Lovely Holiday Special! Highlights include: The origins of the Fabulous Fucking Hawk-Boy, Sanguinius! Emperor's Kiy-Buran Feast Recipes Revealed! Aggressive Recruit...

Ep 16 - Soup Wars II: A Pasta Sea - Age of Apostasy 2

The Heretical Historian team isn't done exp-LORE-ing the Age of A Pasta Sea, this time far outside the Imperium's core, on the planet of Gathalamor. Ian leads Scott and Max through the convoluted plots of Cardinal Buchan..Bucharis. Early on, we explore the deep baking knowledge preserved in the Milky Way by the Ultramarines. Highlights Include The Chili Orthodoxy and The Chowder Heresy! Network Radio Franchising! Fenris Besieged! The Churro Revolt! Torture, for The Love of the People! ...

Ep 15 - Soup Wars - Age of Apostasy 1

The Heretical Historian crew dishes out the hot soup on the early years of the Age of Apostasy as Ian leads Max and Scott through the Chili history of the rise of the Minestrone and their conflict with the Administratum of Soup.   Ingredients: The Rise of the Minestrone! The EMPRAH's Wrath Unleashed! Goge Vandire, Faker of Miracles and Slayer Fanatic! Our Very First Quoted Passage! The Origins of the Adeptus Sororitas: The Sisters of Battle! The Chowder Reformation: A Kinder, More Car...

Ep 14 - The Second Unsettling - Age of Man 3

The Heretical Historian and his team examine the period of relative peace and stability in the Imperium in the Millenia following the War of the Beast.  Harassed repeatedly by the Black Crusades of Ol' Armless himself, Abaddon the Despoiler, the Imperium does Truly Great Things (TM) as it recovers from it's highly contentious Fungal infection! Truly Great Things Highlights: Heretical Hootenannies in the Eye of Terror! The Origins of the Black Legion! Failbaddon the Armless Explained! 9...

Ep 13 - That's No Moon! - Age of Man 2

The Heretical Historian Ian attempts to tell the story of the Great Beast which nearly swept the Imperium from the galaxy while Scott and Max, his accomplices, do their utmost to derail this.  Highlights Include: Fortifying Positions! Definitely Not Heresy! The Aeldari! (For Some Reason) Koorland Dies At The End! VULKAN LIVES!

A Hive Mind Holiday - The Thanksgiving Special

Our Heretical Historian Ian and his assistants in historical libel, Max and Scott, attempt to expound upon and examines the long and illustrious history of the Great Devourer, the Tyranids, as they slowly eat their way across the Milky Way Galaxy.  Highlights Include: Blueberry Blintzes! Craftworld Crème Brule! Oven Roasted Guardsmen! T'au Tar-Tar! Cannibal Crepes! Octarius Mushroom Gravy! Baal's Best Blood Pudding! Second Founding Soufflés!  Special thanks to our First Born Patron, Marka!

Ep 12 - Everyone Expects the Imperial Inquisition - Age of Imperium 1

The Warmaster Crew examine the universe as it deals with the ramifications and consequences of the Horus Heresy. You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll have your legion split apart into tiny chapters!  Highlights Include: The Return of Luther the Unmentioned! Fabulous Bill Strikes Again! Form 43-B, In Triplicate! Imperial Dentistry Explained! Codex Published! Support us on Patreon for early access and exclusive content! https://www.patreon.com/WarmasterPodcast Warmasters Ian and Scott drawn by...

Ep 11 - The Spice of Sacrifice: Two Fingers Too Many - Horus Heresy 5

Having returned from our brief jump into the Wayback machine, our Heretical Historian and Scott find that another passenger has come back with them. The Warboss formally known as Max seems to have hitched a ride in our weird time machine.  In a stroke of luck, our new guest is well versed in the history of the universe, and helps our Heretical Historian to navigate the vague and unrecovered story of the Siege of Terra. These final sixty days of Horus' Grand Rebellion would determine the fat...

Ep 10 - Suicidal Sorties and Regretful Revelations - Horus Heresy 4

Our Heretical Historian and his most loyalest associate Scott take in the briefest overview of the last years of the Grand Rebellion, often mislabeled as the Horus Heresy, as told by the record keepers of the Imperium. Everything gets turned to 11 as the next stage in the Great Game inches ever closer to successful completion.  Highlights include Suicidal Assassination Missions! Suicidal Rescue Attempts For Other Suicide Missions! Suicidal Sector Assaults! Suicidal Self Sacrifice for Sleepy...

He Who Smelt It, Dealt It: The Halloween Spooktacular

In this Xtra spooky episode, we take a trip in the way-back machine and revisit our dear old friends the Necrontyr. Along the way, we encounter another dedicated Historian, who goes by the Olde Earthe Nayme of Maxxx. Or possibly just Max. Probably the second one. Reinterpreting the events of the Ancient Past through the eyes of the Necron Dynasties, the Silent King's libraries shed some Tesla Light on the ancient happenings in the Milky Way. Highlights Include The Return of the Space Frogs...

Ep 9 - Blueberry Angel Cakes with Salamander Grease - Horus Heresy 3

Our Heretical Historian continues to blindly guide our ship through the ever turbulent storms of the tales of the Horus Heresy, harried as ever by the ever present Scott.  With the Grand and fully warranted rebellion of the great Warmaster Horus fully engulfing the Imperium, the net draws tighter around Imperium Secundus. The Infiltrators of the Alpha Legion awaken in the Sol System, wreaking havoc across Terra and Pluto. Perturabo and the Iron Warriors adopt self-mutilation as a lifestyle....

Ep 8 - This is Just Heresy, Heresy For the Family - Horus Heresy 2

In this episode, the Heretical Historian and Scott hash out the events of the early years of the Long War. This begins the most heavily documented period of Imperial History, so our team have an uphill battle trying to pierce the Imperial Propaganda for the truth of the matter.  Highlights include: Evil Batman! Ferrus Manus Finally Gets Ahead! A Very Angry Ron! Warmasters Ian and Scott drawn by Chaney Howe (Follow him on Instagram @Chanaya_Twain) Logo/Title and Visual Media by Freyr Hollis...

Ep 7 - Daddy Issues and Demon Pacts

Our Heretical Historian gives a completely unbiased and objective account of the opening acts of the Horus Heresy attempting to summarize over a dozen remembrancer chronicles in a single hour, as Scott attempts to piece together the insane, and occasionally nonsensical, history presented as such. Highlights include  Magnus Doing Nothing Wrong! The Introduction of Fabulous Bill! The True Loyalty of the Dark Angels Revealed!

Ep 7 - Daddy Issues and Demon Pacts - Horus Heresy 1

Our Heretical Historian gives a completely unbiased and objective account of the opening acts of the Horus Heresy attempting to summarize over a dozen remembrancer chronicles in a single hour, as Scott attempts to piece together the insane, and occasionally nonsensical, history presented as such. Highlights include  Magnus Doing Nothing Wrong! The Introduction of Fabulous Bill! The True Loyalty of the Dark Angels Revealed! Warmasters Ian and Scott drawn by Chaney Howe (Follow him on Ins...

Ep 5.A - Phalanx Field Trip Part 1

Our Heretical Historian Ian and his partner in lies, Scott, embark on a journey deep into loyalist territory as they discuss the history of the FALSE EMPEROR and the IMPERIAL LIE which spawned it with a remembrancer of the Imperial Fists, the loyal sons of Rogal Dorn.  The second part of this incursion into enemy space will be uploaded when we can scramble the Astropathic network to disguise our upload point.

Ep 5.A - Phalanx Field Trip Part 1 - Age of Man 1

Our Heretical Historian Ian and his partner in lies, Scott, embark on a journey deep into loyalist territory as they discuss the history of the FALSE EMPEROR and the IMPERIAL LIE which spawned it with a remembrancer of the Imperial Fists, the loyal sons of Rogal Dorn.  The second part of this incursion into enemy space will be uploaded when we can scramble the Astropathic network to disguise our upload point.

Ep 5 - Phalanx Field Trip Part 1 - Age of Man 1

Our Heretical Historian Ian and his partner in lies, Scott, embark on a journey deep into loyalist territory as they discuss the history of the FALSE EMPEROR and the IMPERIAL LIE which spawned it with a remembrancer of the Imperial Fists, the loyal sons of Rogal Dorn.  The second part of this incursion into enemy space will be uploaded when we can scramble the Astropathic network to disguise our upload point. Warmasters Ian and Scott drawn by Chaney Howe (Follow him on Instagram @Chanaya_Tw...

Ep 6.B - Phalanx Field Trip Part 2: On a (Space)Boat

The second part of our pointless investigation into the completely false history of the absolutely not a god, big faker, the FALSE EMPEROR of mankind and his genetically engineered, sorcery-fueled offspring, some of whom turned out O.K. and recognized the IMPERIAL LIE for what it was.  Also, Special Thanks to our Guest, Cameron!

Ep 6.B - Phalanx Field Trip Part 2: On a (Space)Boat - Age of Man 2

The second part of our pointless investigation into the completely false history of the absolutely not a god, big faker, the FALSE EMPEROR of mankind and his genetically engineered, sorcery-fueled offspring, some of whom turned out O.K. and recognized the IMPERIAL LIE for what it was.  Also, Special Thanks to our Guest, Cameron!

Ep 6 - Phalanx Field Trip Part 2: On a (Space)Boat - Age of Man 2

The second part of our pointless investigation into the completely false history of the absolutely not a god, big faker, the FALSE EMPEROR of mankind and his genetically engineered, sorcery-fueled offspring, some of whom turned out O.K. and recognized the IMPERIAL LIE for what it was.  Also, Special Thanks to our Guest, Cameron! (Check out his Instagram @ Warmasters Ian and Scott drawn by Chaney Howe (Follow him on Instagram @Chanaya_Twain) Logo/Title and Visual Media by Freyr Hollis (Chec...

Ep 4 - Khorne Flakes and Other Gods

Ep 4 - Khorne Flakes and Other Gods - Ancient History 4

In this episode our Heretical Historian takes his intrepid partner in lies, Scott, on a toe-deep journey into the hellish nightmare realm that is the Warp. Issues and Untouchables abound in the non-Euclidean realm of The Nothing, but so long as you Follow the Leader, we'll See You on the Other Side, where Life is Peachy.  Highlights include: Frog Leg Eating Competitions! Those Dang Aeldari Getting What's Coming! The Material Birth of Our Dark Lord and Savior, She Who Thirsts! Sound masteri...

Ep 3. The War in the Heavens 2: Aeldari Boogaloo - Ancient History 3

In this episode we delve into the Aeldari War in the Heavens, not to be confused with the similarly named War in the Heavens that occurred between the C'tan and the Old Ones.  Sound mastering by Rob Paquette Warmasters Ian and Scott drawn by Chaney Howe (Follow him on Instagram @Chanaya_Twain) Logo/Title and Visual Media by Freyr Hollis (Check out his Facebook @Freyr Hollis)

Ep 3. The War in the Heavens 2: Aeldari Boogaloo

In this episode we delve into the Aeldari War in the Heavens, not to be confused with the similarly named War in the Heavens that occurred between the C'tan and the Old Ones. 

Ep 2. Short Tempers and Long-Term Plans (A Bloomberg 2020 Production) - Ancient History 2

Heretical Historian Ian goes over the convoluted beginnings of the War in the Heavens, as cranky Space Frogs attempt to get those dang Robo-kids off of their galactic front lawn, with his intrepid assistant/hostage, Scott. Sound mastering by Rob Paquette Warmasters Ian and Scott drawn by Chaney Howe (Follow him on Instagram @Chanaya_Twain) Logo/Title and Visual Editing by Freyr Hollis (Check out his Facebook @Freyr Hollis)

Ep 2. Short Tempers and Long-Term Plans (A Bloomberg 2020 Production)

Heretical Historian Ian goes over the convoluted beginnings of the War in the Heavens, as cranky Space Frogs attempt to get those dang Robo-kids off of their galactic front lawn, with his intrepid assistant/hostage, Scott.

Ep 1. Frogs, Flatulence, and 40k History

The heretic historian, Ian, relays the earliest moments recorded in the history of the Warhammer 40k universe to his unwilling disciple, the hapless servitor Scott.