SJ124: USB 3.2 Live Crew, gotta know when to fold ‘em, Cellbrite-shun, dial 0000 for Comcast, & more

There wasn't that much news this week, cadets, but what there was was mind-numbingly dumb. The USB overlords have lost their minds, phone-hacking boxes were found on Ebay, New York is investigating apps that leak data to FaceBook, Apple shareholders never tire of pointless proposals that go down in flames, Comcast phones fail basic security, and Bloomberg is still lying about compromised servers, four months later.

Huawei watched Samsung introduce an overpriced toy for way too much money and said "hold my beer," Thunderclap turns out not to be applause for Thunderbolt, Qualcomm has basically written off any future Apple business, T-Mob and Sprint started to sorta-kinda own up on "5G" rollouts, the "celeb-gate" guy got a slap on the wrist (he may like that sort of thing, though).

There is some good news of course -- like forthcoming iPads and Apple's latest services, Apple Music ruling the US record industry while Apple Watch rules the smartwatch (and "dumbwatch" market as well), more Siri shortcuts and Apple educational videos, plus Girls Who Code and more gear for Engineering Report. That said, we're still going to advice a full hazmat suit for this one cadets -- teh stoopid, IT BURNS!