Sabrina the Teenage Watch
110 episodes - English - Latest episode: almost 3 years ago - ★★★★★ - 41 ratingsThe greatest, wittiest and most ridiculous Sabrina the Teenage Witch podcast in the realm!
Join Phil Dean, Graham Riley and Chris Evans every Monday as they discus what made Sabrina so great and the 90s so ... unique!
Follow us on twitter @sabrinawatch and search for Sabrina The Teenage Watch on Facebook to stay up to date and to get in touch!
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Episodes
The End of An Era
May 31, 2021 00:00 - 1 hour - 58.8 MBWell here we are Witches, it's the end of an era, hold back those tears as we say farewell to Season 4, Westbridge, 2 awful characters, the best actor in the show thus far and believe it or not Harvey for a spell (a Season 5 spoiler there for you). If you like what we do and you wanna hear us talk about other things then check out our brand new Podcast 'Along Came Poddy', it's all about bloody terrible 2000s rom coms!
Double Whammy (Fanny) - She's Baaack & The 4 Faces of Sabrina
April 29, 2021 17:21 - 1 hour - 56.7 MBWhen an episode is so crap what do you do!? You combine it with another marginally better one of course!! First we begin talking about She's Baack where throughout we wish Amanda would have just stayed hoooome, however we then join the gang for what feels like a classic episode of Sabrina with a full cast, a delightfully silly plotline and good solid gags! We also mourn the loss of Mr Kraft & Martin Mull, by far the best actor on this whole damn show!
S4 E19 The Wild, Wild Witch (Wicki Wild)
March 09, 2021 21:45 - 51 minutes - 52.4 MBYEE-HAW! Howdy Witches and welcome to the wicki-wild, wicki wicki Wild Wild West! There's no Will Smith to be seen anywhere but there is a rule breaking teenager, a petulant kid and Sweet Willie to indulge in. We also fondly recall about how much of an abhorrent piece of shit John Wayne was and rejoice at the inspirational words of an iMDb blooper sleuth!
S4 E18 Dreama the Mouse
February 10, 2021 00:00 - 1 hour - 62.2 MBThis week Dreama (remember her) gets turned into a mouse by Brad (remember him) for the epic conclusion of that Witch Hunter storyline (remember that!?) Jeez, thankfully Chris had to leave half way through the recording otherwise the episode would have been too sad and explicit. Also, for one week only, we abolish our own review and instead read one from the murky depths of IMDB!
S4 E17 Salem's Daughter
January 20, 2021 17:00 - 1 hour - 72.7 MBThis week we learn that The Other Realm host wild weddings, Salem has a daughter and the actress playing her is a maniacal piece of shit! Would you know it!? We also challenge Graham to come up with a decent cake related joke by the end of the episode and pitch a new game show to Netflix #itsnotacake
S4 E16 Welcome Back, Duke
January 07, 2021 00:00 - 1 hour - 74 MBThis week we steer away from the usual magical curriculum and instead talk about someone else, yes we push Sabrina aside and gush over the wonderfully majestic, magical and immortal Dick Van Dyke. Easily one of the most memorable episodes of the entire show's run, Salem's old underling Duke returns from serving his sentence and aims to make amends for his crimes. By gosh we need to protect this man for the rest of his days.
S4 E15 - Love In Bloom
December 22, 2020 00:00 - 1 hour - 64.4 MBThis week love is certainly in the air, although not everyone is in need of it as Sabrina becomes desired by 2 admirers and obviously proceeds to slowly succumb to a terrifying disease because of it! Happy Valentines Day Witches! We also briefly touch on the worst Barbie playset ever made and remind people everywhere just how much of a transphobic piece of shit JK Rowling is!
Extra Credit - Truncheons & Dragons (Something To Tie You Over)
November 15, 2020 00:00 - 1 hour - 57.5 MBWelcome to Extra Credit, the spin off podcast where we steer away from the usual magical curriculum and instead we talk about something a little bit different. This couldn't be less related to Sabrina or the 90s if it tried, however it is related to us as it's OUR NEW PODCAST! To tie you over until our next episode just sit back, relax and prepare to be completely bewildered by the first ever Fantasy-RolePlaying-Comedy-Crime-Thriller show where we take it in turns to write a chapter for an e...
S4 E14 Super Hero
October 29, 2020 18:00 - 1 hour - 59.6 MBThis week it's all about dreams coming true, Mr Kraft dreams of being a pilot, Harvey dreams of being a superhero, and Graham dreams of seeing Salem in another funny outfit and remote controlled car ... fortunately all of these come true in Melissa Joan Hart's directorial debut!! Oh and we also meet the world's sexiest and most seductive cat, fact!
S4 E13 Now You See Her, Now You Don't
October 10, 2020 00:00 - 57 minutes - 48.8 MBLet's celebrate the first episode of the 21st Century by talking about body dysmorphia yaay! That's right, this week Sabrina teaches us about body positivity, likewise we tell you about ours whilst we spend far too much time talking about Chris' gradual balding. We also discuss rebranding our podcast's tagline, as well as teasing yet again that one day we'll tweet more than just a link to this new episode ...
S4 E12 Sabrina Nipping at Your Nose
September 18, 2020 17:00 - 1 hour - 52 MBHo Ho Hoh crap it's another Christmas episode ... Will Sabrina re-remember the true meaning of Christmas? Will the Spellmans get to Jamaica? Will we threaten to cancel the podcast entirely ... again? SPOILER ALERT: It's actually, genuinely, truly not that bad an episode.
S4 E11 Salem & Juliette
September 03, 2020 00:00 - 1 hour - 55.4 MBSalem needs a gal for his high school reunion, and fortunately for him a demonic, reanimated corpse from the Puppetry branch of the Pet Cemetery answers his calling ... Other things happen in this episode but honestly we're far too disturbed to talk about much more then this feline horror show ... for all our sakes I hope it was set on fire!
S4 E10 Ice Station Sabrina
July 26, 2020 00:00 - 1 hour - 50.8 MBThis week we discuss easily the most action packed and perilous episode yet as Sabrina, Harvey & Brad almost freeze to death ... however on the flip side (to quote Graham) "there was a lot of progression in this episode, and I hated every bit of it" ... so make of that what you will. Also, does a Witch Hunter have the exact same magical prowess as a mere mortal? Yes is the answer.
S4 E9 Love Means Having to Say You're Sorry
July 12, 2020 00:00 - 1 hour - 53.9 MBThis week Sabrina tries every way possible of apologising to Harvey, obviously apart from actually saying "Sorry". Meanwhile (if Chris' accidental potentially misunderstanding research is to be believed), we celebrate the show's first and final Thanksgiving episode ... gobble gobble! No former 80s popstars were harmed, insulted or devastated in this week's episode ...
S4 E8 Ageing, Not So Gracefully
June 21, 2020 00:00 - 1 hour - 50.9 MBThis week Sabrina is battling with a decision on which boy she is destined to be with, whilst the show's writers are battling with a decision on how unnecessarily inappropriate and bizarre they can make a Salem subplot! Man the 90s were just a different time! CAUTION: This episode contains portrayals of French people, a nation that everyone involved in this show so obviously hate.
S4 E7 Prelude To a Kiss
June 07, 2020 00:00 - 1 hour - 60.6 MBThis week Sabrina commits the most heinous acts of betrayal you could ever imagine ... and if you're upset about the lack of 'SPOILER' Warning then don't be because the episode title kinda gives that away. Apart from the heartbreaking cliffhanger you've also got the return of The Pirates to look forward to, YEHAW!!
S4 E6 Episode LXXI: The Phantom Menace
May 24, 2020 00:00 - 1 hour - 60.9 MBAs if The World isn't scary enough as it is we get a terrifyingly below average Halloween Episode about Sabrina's coffee waking the dead, featuring new faces, faces you've forgotten and faces you couldn't care any less about ... happy Halloween folks! We also finally unveil the truth behind the fabled Westbridge Catacombs and what Zombies are really hunting for, leave your tin foil hats at the door please.
S4 E5 Spoiled Rotten
May 10, 2020 00:00 - 58 minutes - 48.7 MBThis week Sabrina's legs melt and she smells of putrefying meat and pig faeces ... allegedly anyway, all because she gets her first credit card and becomes literally spoiled! Also Salem has the worst sub plot yet, it's so bad we were actually fondly recalling an episode of Teen Angel, gross! WARNING: EPISODE CONTAINS GRAPHIC RECOLLECTIONS OF TEEN ANGEL.
S4 E4 Little Orphan Hilda (Take 2 - Nailed It This Time!)
April 26, 2020 17:00 - 1 hour - 54.4 MBWahay we've found out how to not sound like our podcast was recorded down the phone! Welcome to the successful take 2 of recording this show remotely, we learnt not to be lazy and frugal with equipment! This time round Hilda has a terrible day, not only does she loathe her mother but she loathes that fact that she was adopted, or was she? Who knows or cares cz it won't matter anyway! Meanwhile a monkey makes a monkey out of Salem but the jokes on him cz he's named after an asshole!
S4 E3 Jealousy (Take 1 - Is This How You Podcast Remotely? Nope)
April 26, 2020 11:00 - 48 minutes - 37 MBWelcome Witches to our first stab at recording this lil podcast remotely ... yeah we'll do it better next time (that's a fact cz it's already recorded!). This week Sabrina becomes unnecessarily enraged with jealousy over Harvey being best buds with Brad, which causes the poor girl to develop Jelotosis ... oh and we meet Mr Kraft's handsome hunk of a brother!
S4 E2 Dream a Little Dreama Me
February 24, 2020 13:13 - 42 minutes - 34.6 MBThis week we say goodbye to Valerie forever and hello (for the time being) to Dreama, the equally as clumsy and unconfident trainee witch under Sabrina's sketchy magical wing. Also we discuss a new investment opportunity that will literally put TimeShare to shame!
S4 E1 - There's No Place Like Home
February 03, 2020 12:00 - 50 minutes - 68.8 MBIt's been a while Witches but we are back for Season 4, thank you so much for your support & patience whilst we got our lives and arses back in gear! For our season opener Sabrina turns 18 (wahay), she hangs out with Britney Spears (wahay) and Mr Kraft is no longer Vice Principal (wahay) ... and that's about all the good news as things quickly go from bad to worse ... We've recently launched our brand new podcast Truncheons & Dragons and we've stuck a cheeky clip at the end of this episode...
Extra Credit - Drive Me Crazy
December 13, 2019 00:00 - 1 hour - 79.1 MBWelcome back to Extra Credit, the spinoff podcast where we steer away from the usual magical curriculum and instead talk about something completely different! Finally, the long awaited retrospective on what was meant to be Melissa Joan Hart's chance to break out of kids TV, but luckily for us (and unfortunately for her) it didn't pan out like that so she graced our screens for a few more seasons! Caution: This episode contains multiple references to Nazis, Fat Bitches and Animal Cruelty ......
S3 E25 The Good, The Bad & The Luau (Season Finale)
August 12, 2019 00:00 - 1 hour - 57 MBGood grief we're finally here, at the end of our 3rd season! Blimey where has all that time gone, and most importantly where as all this season's narrative arc been!? Sabrina at long last solves the family secret and unfortunately it's as unfulfilling and flat as we'd feared ... oh well, at least season 4 is better right? ... right? Thank you to everyone who has taken time out of their busy lives to hear the 3 of us talk about a 20 year old kids show. These past 2 years have been such fun,...
S3 E24 Silent Movie
July 22, 2019 00:00 - 48 minutes - 50.7 MBThis week Sabrina takes drastic action to ensure Mr Kraft doesn't become Uncle Kraft, and in doing so she turns the entire Spellman house into the set of a silent blockbuster. Season 3 also takes a brief, well needed moment to embrace the feels as we see Sabrina & Harvey finally confess their love for each other ... almost makes us forget how much this season has sucked!
S3 E23 Sabrina the Sandman
July 10, 2019 00:00 - 50 minutes - 48.3 MBThis week Sabrina sends her friends & neighbours to sleep and becomes a gosh darn dream dropper!! The show is also treated to a kick up the arse as we finally FINALLY see this family secret snoozefest come to a no doubt anticlimactic end. Oh and we're also really serious about our Police chief turned tennis coach itv drama, if anyone wants in to DM us!
S3 E22 The Long and Winding Shortcut
June 24, 2019 14:43 - 48 minutes - 51.5 MBThis week Sabrina remembers that the season finale is looming and she's done nob all with her family secret board, so she tries to cheat the system and screws herself over ... again! Do you know why we write things down and type things up? If you can enlighten us then please do get in touch, we can't sleep until we know the truth!!
S3 E21 Sabrina's Real World
June 10, 2019 00:00 - 1 hour - 69.3 MBThis week Sabrina discovers the perils & catastrophic inconvenience of Reality TV, whereas Hilda struggles to literally adjust to the show's cleverest joke yet! If you think our Dinosaur awakening, apocalyptic action drama staring Dwayne Johnson has some legs, then please pitch us your thoughts and get this screenplay into that Hollywood
S3 E20 Sabrina's Pen Pal
May 27, 2019 00:00 - 55 minutes - 59.8 MBThis week Sabrina smuggles her pen pal Martha into the Mortal Realm, however that sweet, innocent and nervous persona is nothing but a bloody rouse as she's a notorious jewel thief! Insert copyright free DUN DUN DUUUN. Also Salem relishes in suicidal thoughts ... yay!
S3 E19 The Big Sleep
May 13, 2019 20:41 - 1 hour - 66.4 MBThis week Sabrina does the one of the few things in this world you should never do ... wake up a grumpy relative. And for her sins the Hilda & Zelda succomb to the mourish slumber of poppies, or perhaps Opium. Also, Phil & Chris proudly present the most diverse & feminist pleasing episode to date ... that's right Witches, we've got a girl on the show!
S3 E18 Sabrina the Teenage Writer
April 29, 2019 00:00 - 50 minutes - 53.3 MBThis week Sabrina's imagination comes to life when the characters from her Spy Movie English story come to life to blow up the school, all thanks to Hilda's secret magical typewriter. Is this episode more than just a less enjoyable carbon copy of the far superior 'As Westbridge Turns'? ... SPOILER ALERT: no.
S3 E17 Salem the Boy
April 15, 2019 00:00 - 57 minutes - 60.7 MBThis week the whole cast get sexually charged, throw nipples & orgies around like there's no tomorrow & hang out with history's most prolific, toga wearing sex offender Caligula ... aren't children's sitcoms fascinating. Plus, in the horrific event of Chris' unexpected and untimely death, let it be known that he predicts Roland will appear once more as a Cherub in Season 4... but can he stay alive to see that (possibly) happen? #prayforchris #thewisestamongstus
S3 E16 Sabrina the Matchmaker
April 08, 2019 00:00 - 54 minutes - 57.4 MBLove is in the Westbridgeon air this week as Sabrina is tasked with bringing 2 completely strangers together before Valentines Day, and it just so happens or miserable, single Cousin Marigold is conveniently popping over for a spell. Also we'd like to know your thoughts on the word "riddled", is it unfit for use in public?
S3 E15 Sabrina and the Pirates
March 18, 2019 00:00 - 1 hour - 68.4 MBThis week Hilda & Zelda hang out with a renegade band of Pirates, whilst Sabrina does everything in her power to hang out with a band of renegade heartthrobs! We also discus Phil's favourite visual gag of the show so far and mock Graham for his extensive knowledge (and love) for the boys from *NSYNC
S3 E14 Mrs Kraft
March 04, 2019 13:30 - 57 minutes - 62.6 MBDue to a severe technical fault during our original recording, Phil & Graham frantically got back together to discus the show's first real villain, Lucy Kraft. With jokes about domestic abuse & a halfhearted cameo from Jerry Fucking Springer, it was definitely worth exploring for a second time. If you'd like to donate to the show for our 'New Kit' fund then please visit www.ko-fi.com/sabrinatheteenagewatch and just leave the equivalent of a cup of coffee! Any help would be greatly appreciat...
S3 E13 What Price Harvey?
February 18, 2019 15:51 - 1 hour - 63.1 MBThis week Sabrina the selfish, small-minded and quite frankly unsupportive Witch hates Harvey's idea of happiness and future endeavours, so she drowns him in magic cologne that naturally backfires massively! The boys also chat about pierced genitalia for a little too long, so enjoy it if you can.
S3 E12 Who's So Called Life Is It Anyway?
February 04, 2019 00:00 - 1 hour - 63.6 MBFinally, the first episode of 2019 is here! Another year gone but another year to reflect on mistakes made, not in Sabrina's case obviously because she puts hers & Valerie's lives at steak! Join us for yet another fun filled nostalgia trip complete with fun fact groan tubes and Phil's observational comedy from 1896, topical as always!
S3 E11 Christmas Amnesia
December 17, 2018 00:00 - 48 minutes - 50.5 MBMerry Bobunk One & All! It's the 3rd annual Sabrina Christmas adventure, and therefore the 3rd worst Sabrina episode of the show so far! This week Sabrina the Grinch makes everyone on Planet Earth forget all about Christmas and she must use her (egg)noggin to make everything right once more. Speaking of egg nogg we three (kings) try it for the first time live on air ... how on earth do you folks drink this stuff on the reg ... nogg!
S3 E10 Sabrina and The Beast
December 10, 2018 00:00 - 1 hour - 61.4 MBThis week's episode is dedicated to the poor, innocent hedgehog that Graham savagely ran over a while back. Sabrina dives head first into the shallow end when her prejudicial behaviour causes Harvey's puberty to take a giant leap forward! We also play everyone's favourite classroom game "Snog, Marry, Avoid" with War, Famine & Crime, what would you choose?
S3 E9 Nobody Nose Libby Like Sabrina Nose Libby
December 03, 2018 00:00 - 54 minutes - 54.5 MBSup Witches, pull up a synapse and relax inside the comfortable yet dripping (and hazardous) head space of Libby Chessler! Tiny spaceships, Mr Kraft dressed as a polka band leader, tyre themed aftershave, this episode almost has it all! Oh and we get far too irate trying to figure out what the meaning behind a 'Homecoming Dance' is, so if you do know please help as we're currently refusing to talk to each other!
S3 E8 And the Sabrina Goes To...
November 26, 2018 00:00 - 51 minutes - 52.8 MBAnd the award for "Best Sabrina Themed Podcast Goes To..." us obviously, however not everyone feels as appreciated as we do with our fictional award as Sabrina creates her own award show because everyone is fed up with patting her on the back! Also can you come up with a punchline to Sabrina's set up gag? "Two Witches walk into a bar..." How should it end, tweet us with the hashtag #twowitcheswalkintoabarthebartenderaskswhatsyourpoisononewitchsaysappletiniandtheothersaysblank
S3 E7 You Bet Your Family
November 19, 2018 16:23 - 50 minutes - 55.1 MBIt's our annual drunk episode, a retelling of a fondly remembered and beloved episode told through the faces of 3 intoxicated goons simply enjoying their holiday! This week Salem the dirty gambler bets and loses the Spellman gals to the notorious Diamond Dave, who we were sad to learn wasn't David Lee Roth ... why NBC, WHHYYYY!!
S3 E6 Good Will Haunting
November 12, 2018 00:00 - 48 minutes - 51.9 MBThis week things get a little insane as Hilda & Zelda become trapped inside a mental asylum, whereas across town Sabrina, Harvey, Val & Justin Thumb are prisoners to the malicious antics of Molly Dolly & Ringo Starr!
S3 E5 Pancake Madness
November 05, 2018 00:00 - 57 minutes - 58.4 MBThis week Sabrina the Teenage Junkie becomes viciously addicted to the noble American pancake, something we Brits cannot relate to as famously we only eat them once a year! Join us for the darkest episode in Sabrina's life so far as we tackle drug metaphors, immigration scandals & even more outdated stereotypes!
S3 E4 The Pom Pom Incident
October 29, 2018 00:00 - 53 minutes - 53.5 MBThis week the shrivelled caterpillar they call Valerie blossoms into a beautify confident cheerleading butterfly ... and of course Sabrina is there with her immature, brain washing, bastard bug spray! Why is Sabrina still the beloved hero we're supposed to look up to? Is Harvey about to become the father to his mother's baby? How many US Presidents were cheerleaders? Find out in our latest magical romp through 1998!
S3 E3 Suspicious Minds
October 22, 2018 00:00 - 1 hour - 66.6 MBThis week that little tinker Roland the troll is back, and once again he is eyeing up our Sabrina, or rather private eyeing ... good grief that sounds bloody worse!! As well as exploring the first real rift between Sabs & Harv we chat about the latter knowing his place in the world, a vanishing mirror & the gooey softer inside of one Mr Willard Kraft!
S3 E2 Boy Was My Face Red
October 15, 2018 00:00 - 58 minutes - 59.2 MBThis week Valerie gets all embarrassed in school, so in an effort to help her bestie Sabrina farts in class to take all the heat off … sorry she doesn't fart because that word is seemingly too raunchy for ABC. On this week's show Chris also debut's his Dusty Springfield impression, and if you want to hear more of his vocal talents then please do get in touch!! Remember to rate & review the show wherever you get it because it helps us and the rest of the Brit Pod Scene out :) x
S3 E1 It's a Mad Mad Mad Mad Season Opener
October 08, 2018 00:00 - 1 hour - 70.9 MBWE'RE BACK WITCHES!!! It's Season 3 and it's gonna be bigger, better & more bloody magical … and no doubt our take on it will follow suit! In our season opener things get a little mad as Sabrina must choose between her 2 former lovers before they kill themselves, but who will she pick? Why is Mr Kraft obsessed with a movie about dog food? Just how many motivational posters do we need in 1 episode? All this and more ready to be injected into your ears
Extra Credit - Are You Afraid of the Dark?
September 03, 2018 00:00 - 1 hour - 112 MBWelcome to Extra Credit, the spin off podcast where we steer away from the usual magical curriculum and instead talk about something a little bit different! Episode 5 - It's the show that you wanted us to revisit, it's Are You Afraid of the Dark? We certainly aren't, however we are scared of ghosts that make an appearance on the show ... yes, that does happen!! For this special retrospective we cover 'The Tale of the Frozen Ghost', 'The Tale of Laughing In the Dark' & the genuinely terrifyi...
Extra Credit - TGIF (Boy Meets World/Teen Angel/You Wish)
August 10, 2018 00:00 - 1 hour - 108 MBWelcome to Extra Credit, the spin off podcast where we steer away from the usual magical curriculum and instead talk about something a little bit different! Episode 4 - TGIF '97 feature the awesome Boy Meets World, the cringe worthy Teen Angel and the abomination that is You Wish. Why is Steve being haunted by the ghost of the mate he killed? What would it be like if Sabrina was a boy and really shit? How have we never watched a single episode of Boy Meets World until now!? All this & more ...