Royally Screwed
42 episodes - English - Latest episode: 20 days ago - ★★★★★ - 2 ratingsRoyally Screwed is a campaign featuring an 8 player in person table. We apologize ahead of time for the goofiness of our players and the idiotic comments that arise during our play. While we hope to entertain you, our first goal is to laugh and be entertained ourselves. We are far from being a professional group. We are simply players with a couple of mics having fun playing DnD as friends and wanting to share our love of TTRPGs with others.
We are currently running Curst of Strahd Reloaded 2.0 as written by Dragnacarta. You can find Dragna on the r/CurseofStrahd Reddit for more information about Reloaded 2.0.
We are not Critical Role, nor are we trying to be. If you are looking for professional trained voice actors and high value production, well, we are not it. Instead, we are just family and friends spending time together around the table every two weeks with a few microphones, documenting our adventures.
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Episodes
S12 Pt 1: Two Hellhounds Humping a Vampire
April 05, 2024 20:44 - 2 hours - 196 MBS12 Part 2: Two Hellhounds Humping a Vampire As the battle on Yester Hill rages on, the party finds themselves in a fight not only against one of Strahd's vampire brides, but magical forces that aim to hinder them from stopping the druid ritual. About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a live at the table campaign featuring an 8 player in person table. We apologize ahead of time for the goofiness of our players and the idiotic comments that arise during our play. While we hope to enter...
S11 Pt 2: A Druid Problem
March 31, 2024 04:42 - 2 hours - 215 MBSession 11 Part 2: A Drruid Problem After clearing the Wizard of Wines out, Davian Martikov approaches the party with another issue that he would like some help with. But a chance encounter on the road to Yester Hill may prove to be a bit too much for the new member of the party. About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a live at the table campaign featuring an 8 player in person table. We apologize ahead of time for the goofiness of our players and the idiotic comments that arise du...
S11 Pt1: Blanket Party
March 22, 2024 16:45 - 2 hours - 165 MBSession 11: Blanket Party On the heels of clearing the Wizard of Wines of the invading Druid forces, the party must now prepare themselves for the horrors that await them at Yester Hill and discover the mystery that is Winterspinter.. About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a live at the table campaign featuring an 8 player in person table. We apologize ahead of time for the goofiness of our players and the idiotic comments that arise during our play. While we hope to entertain you,...
Session 10: The Battle of Stinky Pits
March 08, 2024 19:24 - 2 hours - 195 MBSession 10: The Battle of Stinky Pits Continuing into the Wizard of Wines, the party takes on the invading druids. But it turns out, someone has been keeping secrets from the party. Who can they trust? About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a live at the table campaign featuring an 8 player in person table. We apologize ahead of time for the goofiness of our players and the idiotic comments that arise during our play. While we hope to entertain you, our first goal is to laugh and be...
Session 9 Pt 2: Mine is Bigger Than Yours
February 16, 2024 20:56 - 1 hour - 102 MBSession 9 Pt 2: Mine is Bigger Than Yours The party makes their way to the Martikov camp to meet with the owner of the Wizard of Wines, but Taillefer immediately butts heads with the rough around the edges, no nonsense Davian Martikov. About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a live at the table campaign featuring an in person table. We apologize ahead of time for the goofiness of our players and the idiotic comments that arise during our play. While we hope to entertain you, our fir...
Session 9 Pt 1: You Smell Like a Bird
February 10, 2024 06:39 - 1 hour - 129 MBSession 9 Part 1: You Smell Like a Bird Urwin Martikov sends a family member along with the party as they head to the Wizard of Wines to inquire about the hold up of recent wine shipments, which puts Taillefer into quite the tizzy. About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a live at the table campaign featuring an in person table. We apologize ahead of time for the goofiness of our players and the idiotic comments that arise during our play. While we hope to entertain you, our firs...
Session 8 Pt 3: A Changing of the Guards
January 24, 2024 22:01 - 44 minutes - 60.7 MBSession 8 Part 3: The Changing of the Guard With the death of Izek Strazni, the party delivers proof of the deed to Fiona Wachter, causing a change in the leadership of Vallaki About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a live at the table campaign featuring an 8 player in person table. We apologize ahead of time for the goofiness of our players and the idiotic comments that arise during our play. While we hope to entertain you, our first goal is to laugh and be entertained ourselves. ...
Session 8 Pt 2: The Freaks Come Out at Night
January 18, 2024 15:54 - 1 hour - 101 MBSession 8 Part 2: With the plan to eliminate Izek Strazni underway, the party finds themselves facing a new challenge in the form of a full Barovian moon. About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a live at the table campaign featuring an 8 player in person table. We apologize ahead of time for the goofiness of our players and the idiotic comments that arise during our play. While we hope to entertain you, our first goal is to laugh and be entertained ourselves. We are far from bei...
Session 8 Pt1: Lose an Elf, Gain an Elf
January 17, 2024 06:19 - 1 hour - 109 MBSession 8 Part 1: Lose an Elf, Gain an Elf While the party discusses how to implement Lady Wachter's plan to eliminate Izek Strazni from Vallaki's political situation, a strange character claiming to have escaped from the dungeons of Ravenloft arrives at the Blue Water inn. Note: Royally Screwed will be working on uploading two/three shorter episodes each week rather than the larger past episodes. We hope that limiting these episodes to between 1-1.5 hrs will be a more pleasant listen...
Session 7 Part 2: A Not So Silent Night
December 24, 2023 00:59 - 3 hours - 262 MBSession 7 Part 2: A Not So Silent Night The party makes a deal with Fiona Wachter to assist with a power grab for the town of Vallaki but find their sanctuary at the Blue Water Inn is shattered by much more than invaded dreams. About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a live at the table campaign featuring an 8 player in person table. We apologize ahead of time for the goofiness of our players and the idiotic comments that arise during our play. While we hope to entertain you, our firs...
Session 7 Part 1: Feel Free to Sniff Asses
December 15, 2023 18:38 - 2 hours - 172 MBSession 7 Part 1: Feel Free to Sniff Asses The party returns to the Vistani camp with Arabelle in tow, but encounters on the path lead to turmoil and possible deception. About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a live at the table campaign featuring an 8 player in person table. We apologize ahead of time for the goofiness of our players and the idiotic comments that arise during our play. While we hope to entertain you, our first goal is to laugh and be entertained ourselves. We are ...
Session 6 Part 2: Tales from the Loop
November 28, 2023 23:54 - 2 hours - 169 MBSession 6 Part 2: Tales from the Loop The search for the missing Vistani child leads the party to the abandoned tower at Lake Baratok, but the echos of the past lead to surprising discoveries and a past visitor to Barovia. About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a live at the table campaign featuring an 8 player in person table. We apologize ahead of time for the goofiness of our players and the idiotic comments that arise during our play. While we hope to entertain you, our first goa...
Session 6 Part 1: Can I Have Your Cat?
November 12, 2023 04:14 - 2 hours - 213 MBSession 6 Part 1: Can I Have Your Cat The party travels to the nearby Vistani camp as a favor to Madame Eva. However, when they find that the child Arabelle has recently been kidnapped, they assist in trying to find the child. About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a live at the table campaign featuring an 8 player in person table. We apologize ahead of time for the goofiness of our players and the idiotic comments that arise during our play. While we hope to entertain you, our f...
Session 5: Love Potion #9
November 04, 2023 05:15 - 2 hours - 234 MBWarning: We apologize for the poor audio quality of this weeks episode. We had a technical issue with one mic and because of this, the audio quality if muddled and hard to hear at times. Because of this, we have elected NOT to put background music in this episode to avoid making it even harder to hear. Note: Episodes will now be uploaded every other week. Episode 5: Love Potion #9 Following the Feast of St Andral, the party takes the day to reset by exploring the town of Vallaki and t...
Episode 4 Part 2 - Puddles of Blood
October 20, 2023 03:59 - 2 hours - 233 MBWhile the adventures might be hungry, this wasn't quite the feast they were hoping for. When a relic comes up missing, the party finds themselves trying to solve the mystery of who's behind it, leaving them face to face with Strahd once again. About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a live at the table campaign featuring an 8 player in person table. We apologize ahead of time for the goofiness of our players and the idiotic comments that arise during our play. While we hope to enter...
Session 4 Part 1 : I’m an Elf
October 13, 2023 04:06 - 2 hours - 188 MBSession 4 Part 1: I'm an Elf Finding themselves at the Blue Water Inn, the party enjoys the hospitality and generosity of the Martikovs while encountering some of the "regulars" of the establishment. However, an event in town makes them quickly realize that not everything is peaceful in the town of Vallaki. About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a live at the table campaign featuring an 8 player in person table. We apologize ahead of time for the goofiness of our players and the idio...
Session 3 Part 2: Big Brown Sack
October 06, 2023 14:16 - 1 hour - 122 MBS3 P2 - Big Brown Sack The party finally arrive in Vallaki, but not without first assisting a strange elderly woman as well as an encounter that leaves Taillefer with a souvenir that both he and the rest of the party might severely regret. About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a live at the table campaign featuring an 8 player in person table. We apologize ahead of time for the goofiness of our players and the idiotic comments that arise during our play. While we hope to entertain y...
Session 3 Part 1: Big Brown Sack
September 29, 2023 04:57 - 2 hours - 218 MBSession 3 Part 1: Big Brown Sack Waking up in the Vistani Camp, the party heads off to Villaki, but first they make a pit stop to a familiar place following their encounter with Strahd. About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a live at the table campaign featuring an 8 player in person table. We apologize ahead of time for the goofiness of our players and the idiotic comments that arise during our play. While we hope to entertain you, our first goal is to laugh and be entertained o...
Session 2 Part 2: Two Favors and a Funeral
September 22, 2023 06:03 - 3 hours - 276 MBEpisode 2 Part 2: Two Favors and a Funeral Leaving the Village of Barovia, the party finds troubles on the road to Tser Pool as they seek out Madame Eva. About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a live at the table campaign featuring an 8 player in person table. We apologize ahead of time for the goofiness of our players and the idiotic comments that arise during our play. While we hope to entertain you, our first goal is to laugh and be entertained ourselves. We are far from being a p...
Session 2 Part 1: Two Favors and a Funeral
September 15, 2023 05:16 - 2 hours - 188 MBEpisode 2: Part 1 Their first 24 hours in Barovia proves to be a hair raising experience as the party finds that peace and quiet are something that the land is severely lacking. But when an unexpected guest arrives at the funeral of Kolyan Indirovich, they find themselves face to face with the Lord of the Land. About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a live at the table campaign featuring an 8 player in person table. We apologize ahead of time for the goofiness of our players and t...
Session 1 Part 2: Dreams of the Mist
September 08, 2023 04:52 - 3 hours - 250 MBAppologies for the poor audio for this episode. We were down to only 1 mic for recording. We will have three mics for episodes in the future. Episode 1 Part 2: After being transported to the strange land of Barovia, far from Daggerfort, the party finds themselves trapped in the Durst Manor. Racing the clock to find Baby Walter before the strike of midnight, they quickly learn that the house is much more than what it seems. About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a live at the ta...
Session 1 Part 1 - Dreams of the Mist
August 31, 2023 19:57 - 3 hours - 272 MBS1 E1 - Into the Mists After a series of dreams featuring a strange, elderly woman in a red cloak, eight players scattered throughout the Forgotten Realms must travel to Daggerfort to find the others that are spoken. They are tasked to find a “man of many colors” who will guide them to the woman in the dream. They find themselves arriving into town on the night before Highharvesttide, an annual feast and holiday celebration. The local inns are full for the night, and the players—vaga...
Episode 1 :Death by SnuSnu (A Call of the Netherdeep Campaign)
March 11, 2023 03:56 - 2 hours - 235 MBFinding themselves at the funeral of a beloved friend (and the owner of some fine trash), a group of adventurers find themselves being asked to discover the mystery behind a deadly virus that turns its victims to blocks of ice. Binkley Billowquick – Male Gnome Artificer – Played by Elliott Jeff White – Male Human Cleric (Life Domain) – Played by Preston Nezha – Male Tiefling Rogue – Played by Jacob Torrwyn – Female Aasimar Paladin – Played by Carrington Don Leon – Male Tabaxi Rogue ...
S1 E17 - Don’t Drop The Soap
June 24, 2022 20:53 - 2 hours - 184 MBThe Motley Fools continue to bumble their way thru the castle of Lord Von Zarovich, but what started off as a fun adventure begins to take an unexpected dark turn. About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a campaign featuring our group of idiots. We apologize ahead of time for the goofiness of our players and the idiotic comments that arise during our play. While we hope to entertain you, our first goal is to laugh and be entertained ourselves. We are far from being a profession...
S1 E16 - Looks Like Meat’s Back on the Menu Boys
June 17, 2022 16:14 - 2 hours - 199 MBThe Fools continue make their way thru Castle Ravenloft. About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a campaign featuring our group of idiots. We apologize ahead of time for the goofiness of our players and the idiotic comments that arise during our play. While we hope to entertain you, our first goal is to laugh and be entertained ourselves. We are far from being a professional group. We are simply players with a couple of mics having fun playing DnD as friends. FIND US ON: DI...
S1 E15 : F You Tom Brady
June 11, 2022 17:37 - 1 hour - 151 MBThe Motley Fools continue to make their way thru Castle Ravenloft following an invite to dinner by Strahd. About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a campaign featuring our group of idiots. We apologize ahead of time for the goofiness of our players and the idiotic comments that arise during our play. While we hope to entertain you, our first goal is to laugh and be entertained ourselves. We are far from being a professional group. We are simply players with a couple of mics hav...
S1 E14 - I Can Get You A Roomba
June 03, 2022 07:49 - 1 hour - 154 MBFollowing their dinner with Strahd, the Motley Fools are given free rein of Castle Ravenloft as they set out on a mission to uncover treachery within. But what secrets does the confines of the brick walls hide? About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a campaign featuring our group of idiots. We apologize ahead of time for the goofiness of our players and the idiotic comments that arise during our play. While we hope to entertain you, our first goal is to laugh and be entertained ...
S1 E13 - Might I Interest You in a Nightcap
April 30, 2022 02:25 - 2 hours - 205 MBThe Motley Fools spend the afternoon trying to make themselves presentable before dinner plans with the Devil. About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a campaign featuring our group of idiots. We apologize ahead of time for the goofiness of our players and the idiotic comments that arise during our play. While we hope to entertain you, our first goal is to laugh and be entertained ourselves. We are far from being a professional group. We are simply players with a couple of mics...
S1E12: Two Bards One Cup
April 16, 2022 00:20 - 1 hour - 161 MBThe Motley Fools spend the day exploring around the lake before their meeting with the mysterious Rictavio. About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a campaign featuring our group of idiots. We apologize ahead of time for the goofiness of our players and the idiotic comments that arise during our play. While we hope to entertain you, our first goal is to laugh and be entertained ourselves. We are far from being a professional group. We are simply players with a couple of mics havi...
Bonus Episode: Tabletop Discussion 2
March 21, 2022 05:58 - 1 hour - 131 MBCassandra, Kodiac, Thixian/Halo, Anet, Velcar, Arlo and Daetu sit down with Braega for a roundtable discussion to talk about their characters and the campaign so far. Get to know the players a bit better while getting inside their heads and enjoy a few laughs as they talk about Royally Screwed. Music Credits: Opening Music : Epic Music by Soundbay (used with permission via AdobeStock)
S1E11: Little Wizard Boy
March 12, 2022 06:44 - 1 hour - 134 MBWhile Velcar and Kodiak are away, Daetu has a mysterious visitor. The following day, the party finds a celebration in the Blue Water Inn. The party finds that magic can be unpredictable in Barovia as well as makes a grizzly discovery in the Burgomaster's Mansion. About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a campaign featuring our group of idiots. We apologize ahead of time for the goofiness of our players and the idiotic comments that arise during our play. While we hope to entertain ...
S1E10 - Praying to Vince Lombardi
March 04, 2022 21:33 - 2 hours - 239 MBAfter discovering who is responsible for the missing bones, the Fools find themselves looking for Henrik van der Voort, but they find more than just the coffin maker waiting for them. But even worse is waiting for them as they try to restore hallowed ground. About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a campaign featuring our group of idiots. We apologize ahead of time for the goofiness of our players and the idiotic comments that arise during our play. While we hope to entertain you...
S1E9 - Dancing in the Streets
February 18, 2022 22:04 - 1 hour - 161 MBAs the day of The Festival of the Blazing Sun arrives, Velcar finds himself once again staring into the eyes of the Lord of Barovia. As violence erupts in the streets, a coup d'etat results in a new Burgomaster of Vallaki. Seeking safety, the Motley Fools bring Ireena to the Chapel of St. Andral, but safety might not be in their reach. About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a campaign featuring our group of idiots. We apologize ahead of time for the goofiness of our players and th...
S1E8 : Mirror Mirror on the Wall
February 12, 2022 22:00 - 3 hours - 275 MBWith three orphans on their hands, the Motley Crew heads back to the Vistani camp in hopes to pawn their problems off on them, only to find themselves taking yet another Vistani problem into their party. A mysterious dinner invite arrives and the party finds things are not as they appear at the Burgomaster's home. About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a campaign featuring our group of idiots. We apologize ahead of time for the goofiness of our players and the idiotic comments tha...
Session 7: For the Love of Pies
February 05, 2022 03:59 - 2 hours - 233 MBWith pies on the brain, the Motley Fools leave the Vistani camp and head for the nearby windmill in the hopes of purchasing some tasty treats. About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a campaign featuring our group of idiots. We apologize ahead of time for the goofiness of our players and the idiotic comments that arise during our play. While we hope to entertain you, our first goal is to laugh and be entertained ourselves. We are far from being a professional group. We are simp...
Roundtable Discussion 1- The Oooops Episode
January 24, 2022 23:28 - 59 minutes - 81.6 MBA sit down chat with Velcar, Thixian and Anet to discuss the events that happened following the lost audio for the previous episode, as well as their thoughts on the current campaign. About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a campaign featuring our group of idiots. We are far from being a professional group. We apologize ahead of time for the goofiness of our players and the idiotic comments that arise during our play. While we hope to entertain you, our first goal is to laugh and be ...
I Think His Name Was Loki
January 24, 2022 23:21 - 1 hour - 114 MBThe Motley Fools meet the colorful bard Rictavio. Note: This session was originally 4 hours long, however, 3 hours of that session was lost due to technically difficulties (user error - the software stopped recording). The Roundtable episode following this episode features Thixian, Anet and Velcar as they discuss with the DM what happened after the audio shut off. About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a campaign featuring our group of idiots. We apologize ahead of time for t...
Houston.. We Have A Druid Problem
December 17, 2021 20:48 - 2 hours - 210 MBUpon being approached by Urwin of the Bluewater Inn, the motley crew find themselves heading west to the Wizard of Wines to investigate why a wine shipment has been delayed. About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a campaign featuring our group of idiots. We apologize ahead of time for the goofiness of our players and the idiotic comments that arise during our play. While we hope to entertain you, our first goal is to laugh and be entertained ourselves. We are far from being a pr...
The Fortunes of Fates
December 07, 2021 02:10 - 2 hours - 169 MBThe motley fools leave Ismark and the Village of Barovia behind heading towards Vallaki. With Ireena in tow, they find their way to Tser Pool, where a reading from Madame Eva and well as surprise from the other side of the mist awaits them. About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a campaign featuring our group of idiots. We are far from being a professional group. We apologize ahead of time for the goofiness of our players and the idiotic comments that arise during our play. While ...
Such a Quiet Village
November 23, 2021 19:14 - 2 hours - 205 MBWith dream pastries in hand, Anet, Thixian, Kodiac, Velcar and HALO make their way thru the Village of Barovia where they meet a family with a problem and come face to face with the ruler of the land. About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a campaign featuring our group of idiots. We are far from being a professional group. We apologize ahead of time for the goofiness of our players and the idiotic comments that arise during our play. While we hope to entertain you, o...
Death House Part 2
November 09, 2021 04:14 - 3 hours - 262 MBAs the motley crew make their way thru the Durst Manor, a new hero is found. About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a campaign featuring our group of idiots. We are far from being a professional group. We apologize ahead of time for the goofiness of our players and the idiotic comments that arise during our play. While we hope to entertain you, our first goal is to laugh and be entertained ourselves. You can find Royally Screwed's offically log-blog at https://royallystrahd.blo...
Death House Pt 1
November 02, 2021 15:43 - 2 hours - 184 MBVelcar, Anet, Halo and Thixian find themselves locked in the Durst Manor. About Royally Screwed Royally Screwed is a campaign featuring our group of idiots. We apologize ahead of time for the goofiness of our players and the idiotic comments that arise during our play. While we hope to entertain you, our first goal is to laugh and be entertained ourselves. We are far from being a professional group. We are simply players with a couple of mics having fun playing DnD as friends. You ...