Ep 5: Abundance in the Journey

Do you ever find yourself comparing your business or yourself to other people? Comparing our  businesses against those around us is as human as it is ubiquitous. With social media, this phenomenon has reached new levels. We see everyone’s biggest hits and massive business breakthroughs every day. It’s easy to get trapped in other people’s good news. Often times, seeing all these things are harmless, but sometimes it can be destructive. But can a pattern of comparing our businesses or ourselves to others have harsher effects on how we perceive ourselves? Yes, it can.

When you start looking around for what other business owners are doing, you fall into a compare and despair mentality trap and you begin to feel like a loser. You eventually lose the energy you had going, you begin to doubt yourself and your business strategies, and finally you begin to spin.

In today’s episode of Rich in Differences we’ll talk about the compare and despair mentality in running a business and also the importance of following our journey.

Episode Spotlights

Example of Compare and Despair Scenario

As a pole dance instructor, I find that a lot of times my pole dancing instruction has a lot of good similarities to what we learn in real life. It puts it into a more physical idea versus just a mental idea. Let’s say I'm teaching 10 girls how to climb a pole. I will give them the instructions and we do it. Then I’ll explain it again and do it a second time because people rarely get things on the first try. But then I’ll always have a few girls who just don't seem to understand what I'm saying and that is totally normal. I’ll ask them like, “Do you just not understand? What's going on?” They're like, “Well, we just don't get it. It doesn't make sense.”  Or, “I'm having a hard time.” So, is I'll drag one of my more advanced students over to my pole and I'll say, “All right, I want you to teach it.” They'll teach it their way and all of a sudden, the few girls that weren't getting it, they'll start getting it. They totally understand now what to do. Here's the thing, me and my advanced students were teaching the exact same thing. We were both teaching how to climb a pole. Yet, my version of the instructions did not reach to everyone. Those who didn't get it, got it from her version of the instruction -- the advanced student's version of the instructions

Discover What Sells Your Business

We can all be teaching the same thing, but that doesn't mean you're going to get every single person. When you really learn that what sells your business, especially if you are a service provider, is you, the better off you'll be because there is enough business for everyone. While you know someone who might have a prettier website than you or a better opt in or better pictures or more advanced like tech going on their website, they're only going to reach their people. They are only going to communicate well with the people who can hear their instructions. That's not everyone, just like in my class, not everyone understands my instructions. The best way to get everyone on the same level is to include different versions of those instructions.  You're just a different version. You're out there you're saying it your way. You’re packaging it your way. You're handling it your way and the people who hear you and who resonate with you, they're going to be attracted to that.

Your Vibe Attracts Your Tribe.

That's getting clichéd, but it's true. Your vibe will attract the people who want to work with you. When you look at other people, you have to remember that that's their journey, and they're attracting the people that want to work with them. Your job for your business is to get out there and attract your tribe. Sell it your way. Use your mannerisms and be you.

How to Beat the Compare and Despair Mentality

When you start to feel the compare despair mentality creeping in, take a step back and remember that you are on your own journey. You're out there to get your own customers and those customers are meant for you. Remind yourself that there is enough business out there for all of us. We like to discuss the abundance mindset and coaching. But a lot of times we forget that when we're in our business. In our business, that's when scarcity mindset really kind of creeps up on us if we're not careful. This is one of the ways that scarcity mindset shows its face. You have to remind yourself, there is enough for all of us. Resources: Free Resource Library Course: Mindset Matters Looking to create your own course: Membervault Looking to collaborate and take some useful classes: Eclectic Entrepreneur  Subscribe To Rich in Differences Podcast Itunes Stitcher Google Play Spotify

 

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Any advice given on the Rich in Differences Podcast should not be construed as a prescription, a promise of benefits, claims of cures, or a guarantee of results to be achieved.

The information, instruction or advice given by Rich in Differences Podcast is not intended to be a substitute for competent professional medical or psychological diagnosis and care. You should not discontinue or modify any medication presently being taken pursuant to medical advice without obtaining approval from your healthcare professional.

As a listener/reader, you must take complete responsibility for your own physical health and emotional well-being.

 

Transcript Below

[00:00:24.070]

This is your hostess with the mostest Brooke. All right. So I recently got a message today. I say recently got a message today. I recently got a message and it happened to be today from a young lady who was talking about her compare and despair mentality in running a business. And they got me thinking about really how common that is. And even I can be drawn into that trap. And I just wanted to come on here today and let's talk about our journey and the importance of following our own journey.

 

[00:01:00.550]

 There is enough business out there for all of us. There really is. And what I explained was I'm a pole dance instructor and I find that a lot of times my pole dancing instruction in my class. It has a lot of good similarities to what we learn in real life. It puts it into a more physical idea of the version versus just the mental idea. So let's say for example I am teaching 10 girls how to climb a pole and I'm given the instructions and I've been doing this for many many years so I got the instructions down pretty well.

 

[00:01:39.070]

 And I explain them and we do it. And then I explain it again and I do it a second time because, you know, people rarely get things on the first try and rightfully so, it is the beginners class. I teach beginners class. I probably should have mentioned that. So they'll, you know, it takes a few times and that is totally normal. But then I always have a few girls who just don't seem to understand what I'm saying. And again that i s totally normal since I've been doing this for years I totally recognize signs and I ask them I'm like, you know, do you just not understand like like what's going on and the like well we just I just don't get it.

 

[00:02:13.840]

 You know does it make sense or I'm having a hard time. So what I'll do is I'll drag one of my more advanced students over to my pole and I'll say all right I want you to teach it and they'll teach it their way and all of a sudden  the few girls that weren't getting it all of a sudden they're getting it like they totally understand now what to do.

 

[00:02:35.230]

And here's the thing. Me and my advanced student were teaching the exact same thing. We were both teaching how to climb a pole. Yet, my version of the instructions did not reach to everyone. And those who didn't get it got it from her version of the instruction. The advanced students version of the instructions. We can all be teaching the same thing but that doesn't mean you're going to get every single person.

 

[00:03:10.570]

When you really learn that what sells your business, especially if your service provider, is you. The better off you'll be because there is enough business for everyone. And while, you know, someone who might have a prettier website than you, or a better opt in, or better pictures, or more advanced like tech going on on their website,  they're only going to reach their people they're only going to communicate well with. The people who can hear their instructions and that's not everyone. Just like in my class not everyone understands my instructions and I have learned that the best way to get everyone, you know, on the same level is to include different versions of those instructions.

 

[00:04:04.450]

 So you're just a different version. You're out there you're saying it your way. You're packaging it your way. You're handling it your way and the people who hear you, who resonate with you, they're going to be attracted to that.  You're going to attract your tribe. Your vibe attracts your tribe. And I know that's getting cliche, right, but it is true. Your vibe will attract the people who want to work with you. So when you look at other people you have to remember that's their journey and they're attracting the people that want to work with them. Your job for your business is to get out there and attract your tribe. Sell it your way.

 

[00:04:51.090]

 Use your mannerisms. Be you. So this week when you start to feel to 'compare and despair' I want you to take a step back. All right, I want you to remember that you are on your own journey and you're out there to get your own customers and those customers are meant for you. OK? And to remind yourself that there is enough business out there for all of us right now. I know we like to discuss the abundance mindset in coaching, but a lot of times we forget that when we're in our business. In our business we start to really see that scarcity mindset really kind of creeps up on us if we're not careful.

 

[00:05:30.960]

 And this is one of the ways that scarcity mindset shows its face. So you have to remind yourself there is enough for all of us.

 

[00:05:40.190]

All right Pop Tarts. That's it for now. As usual we're going to leave a message to my dad. Hey dad, I saw you in an awesome shirt today. I wonder who bought that for you. She's got some really good taste. Love ya!