EP 85: Win Your Wife--Not the Argument

Welcome to the Relationship Fitness Podcast! We are talking about taking your relationship to the next level, and we know there is always room for improvement. Specifically, how does it profit you to win all the arguments but lose your spouse in the process? Join me to learn more!

 

It all comes down to ego

For the sake of our relationships, we have to set aside our pride and ego and learn to tame our drive always to conquer and win. This can be a challenging thing for most of us men. We have to keep the right perspective that the health of our relationship is more important than being “right.” Remember that your kids are watching and learning, so keep the long-range goal in mind. Set a good example in the way you handle arguments and disagreements. 

 

Look out for blind spots

In our relationships, we all have habits and mannerisms that we do without thinking; they are just automatic. For example, I was ingrained not to ask for anything above absolute necessities as a child because I wouldn’t get them anyway. I caught myself in this blind spot when parenting my boys when they were young and asked for something extravagant. Their reactions told me that I had responded in a hurtful way simply because of how I was raised. I’m asking you to take notice of your words and tone when conversing with your kids and spouse. You can gauge by their reaction to you how you are coming across.

 

Pay attention

Take notice of how your loved ones react to what you say and how you say it. If their reaction is negative, nervous, or one of withdrawal, then you may have a blind spot that needs to be addressed and changed. Look at it as an opportunity to improve and learn not to cause hurt to the hearts of those you love. Observe their reactions, and don’t be afraid to ask for feedback on how you are doing. 

 

***Leave me your feedback. Let me know how you are finding and improving your blind spots to benefit your relationship. Ask your family how you are falling short in fostering the environment you want in your home. It’s a great thing if your kids watch you work out disagreements because it helps them learn positive relationship skills. Improving your relationship fitness and solidifying your relationship legacy WILL make a difference. You are not just raising children, but someone’s future spouse and someone’s future parent. Go out there and be loving, kind, patient, and generous! Let’s help save the world--one relationship at a time!

 

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