241 episodes - English - Latest episode: 3 days ago -

I have been scratching scribe to script and burning tallow onto table in order to bring you a fabulously free A to Z of poetry.

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September 26, 2022 08:48 - 3 minutes - 2.96 MB

Being at sea aboard huge luxury vessels is very glamorous and as a skipper come captain it is so easy to be wined and dined each evening by billionaires with the finest foods and drink the only drawback is that you steadily become an old soak, I worked alongside many captains who became just that, thinking back to a collision at night with JJ the skipper and a refugee boat he had got drunk with a stewardess and gone to bed leaving the vessel on autopilot the similarities to Titanic are on a m...


September 26, 2022 07:09 - 1 minute - 1.71 MB

A poem about men and their midwife crisis as a matter course men feel the need to try out a new horse so they get a divorce and set off in search of adventure usually riding a Harley-Davidson towards the sun and what they think will be some all new sexual fun .


September 25, 2022 22:00 - 1 minute - 1.48 MB

The building blocks of life are made from nucleic acids , Lysergic acid has also been around since the dawn of time doubtless it would have been eaten by our early primate mammalian species in the form of magic mushrooms so increasing hallucinogenic and conscious brain capability hence where the homo sapiens may have got their synaptic kick start from.


September 25, 2022 18:12 - 1 minute - 1.44 MB

As you get older looking for love is similar to rummaging through a scrap yard come jumble sale you sift an shake through the worn torn fragile and fail usually to no avail things are stretched out of shape almost befitting the proverbial grey whale instead of the once sleek male or female then suddenly there it is the right one for you the little bunny rabbits bob tail an together you dovetail perfectly as you'd been handmade by thomas chippendale .


September 25, 2022 09:20 - 1 minute - 1.37 MB

A poem written for two old Bohemians who through reckless behaviour in younger year did so destroy the fragile entity of love and are now left with just the ghost of her to haunt their old empty hearts .


September 25, 2022 08:07 - 1 minute - 1.73 MB

A poem I wrote for my father who was born in 1926 and now similar to an old model T ford motor car needs constant tinkering and maintenance to keep him running . I've done my best to copy his gasping Yorkshire speech ,he was born in the days of the horse and cart starting work at the age of twelve down in the mills on the east side of steel river , he mentioned that not only were the steel dreys pulled by the huge shire horses but during the second world they also used the might of elephants ...


September 24, 2022 21:08 - 1 minute - 1.59 MB

A person who is cast in abject austerity remains of the same mind set forever even though they may have risen to a position of privileged prosperity .


September 24, 2022 19:52 - 2 minutes - 2.16 MB

A living monument of mystery Robin Hoods oak is by far the most famous tree in all of ancient history , a thousand years of silent still sophistry , with all its empty holes and hollow the winter winds howl through her creating a mournful sound of sadness and sorrow.


September 24, 2022 19:51 - 1 minute - 1.63 MB

When children acquire their first language they sing like a fresh fledgling on the first day of spring with that easy natural swing which to them is a brand new play thing without any restraining ring , their simple melodic crooning needs no interference or fine tuning but unfortunately school comes along with its lexicon Lego box tongue "dislexicating " what was once a beautiful song leaving that innocent syllable swing broken as a veritable birds wing the kids then become too frightened to ...


September 24, 2022 16:54 - 1 minute - 1.44 MB

Every experience through the innocent eyes of a child can be quite terrifying now as an adult even death is placed into a casual calm context your maker might as well be your baker.


September 24, 2022 14:12 - 1 minute - 1.71 MB

Every day the paparazzi serve us our blood and gore all fleshy sacrificed red and raw, no good being a herbivore you've really got to be a cover story carnivore with the stomach of a blood thirsty toreador , let's face it the press room's a slaughtering house stable and the editor's desk is nothing more than the butcher's table.


September 24, 2022 11:49 - 1 minute - 1.2 MB

Medieval doctors use to dress as huge birds with long beak's and feathered cloaks believing that the soul was delivered and despatched by the avian transmigration i.e stalk''s, babies , raven's omens cookoo's madness . To find an egg shaped lump of cancer that then hatches from its embryo into a fresh eating vulturous thing leaving behind an almost a dead skeleton could be perceived by the ancient superstitious to be the work of an avian devil .


September 24, 2022 06:35 - 2 minutes - 2.19 MB

Old Colonials talk of empire its quite shocking how they used to think of human beings as nothing more than chattels not just the natives but also the white workers and soldiers such as my old father now 95 years of age he told me during his time in India just after the second world War whilst protecting the British Raj who looked upon him also as their SLAVE OF EMPIRE .


September 23, 2022 18:36 - 1 minute - 1.67 MB

A poem about an old rag and bone man who started out with just a horse and cart then after a life of skinflinting strife became very rich but even there upon acquiring great weath still retained his beggar man roots and rhetoric.


September 23, 2022 07:29 - 3 minutes - 1.72 MB

The green eyed monster of sin that secret schadenfreude which we keep hidden away so deep within usually it's only seen in children as their rival for survival and parental attention the lowly leftover instinct of our anthropic ascension , however this terrible traits can also be witnessed later in our lives when when the male begins to assert it's dominance as the procreation stage arrives .


September 22, 2022 19:43 - 1 minute - 973 KB

A poem I wrote for a woman who lost the love of her life only to marry someone who couldn't replace or replicate her first love so ending up living in some festering union of hate .


September 22, 2022 08:45 - 3 minutes - 2.9 MB

The green eyed monster of sin that secret schadenfreude which we keep hidden away so deep within usually it's only seen in children as their rival for survival and parental attention the lowly leftover instinct of our anthropic ascension , however this terrible traits can also be witnessed later in our lives when when the male begins to assert it's dominance as the procreation stage arrives .


September 21, 2022 21:06 - 2 minutes - 2.58 MB

A poem about falling into destitution especially soldiers and sailors who you find in the beggars brigade of most British towns. How easy it be to cast contempt , lest we forget our debt.


September 21, 2022 12:31 - 3 minutes - 2.98 MB

A short song about Buying power tools at the DIY hardware store You may as well  arm yourself with a weapon of war casualties around the world run into the hundreds of thousands the body counts are  higher than in most modern theatres of war.


September 21, 2022 10:16 - 1 minute - 1.57 MB

A musing about a talkative taxi driver who would insist on talking about his part time profession as a slaughter men come taxi-dermist my frightfully far back friend and I were able to see and smell the blood by the end of our short journey .


September 21, 2022 08:57 - 1 minute - 1.63 MB

Looking at some tramps in cider park I felt sorry for the poor starving pets as their masters swill down cider and they shivered in the cold , the musing is seen or spoken through a dog .


September 21, 2022 07:18 - 50 seconds - 792 KB

God Google. A short poem I wrote about the neo omnipresent computer algorithm that seems almost all controlling and God like in its invisible presence .


September 20, 2022 20:02 - 1 minute - 1.73 MB

An English king's breakfast could  consist  of swine flesh, embryos , fungi ,congealed blood , kippers, herring's, pike , roach various birds venison, cockles , pilchards .    when thinking about the Buddhist belief of  reincarnation  wouldn't it be a devine justice  if these gargantuan gluttonous  came back  as screaming red faced tomatoes in a vegan salad .


September 20, 2022 11:42 - 1 minute - 1.76 MB

For someone who's fifty something plus tax and sexually straight it's quite hard to understand all the new sexual genderisations that are now taking place but as they always say let love rule .


September 19, 2022 20:50 - 1 minute - 1.63 MB

The Harrogate Belles Angels were a group of girls who rode motorbikes wore leather , took drugs and slaked drink but most of all they were stunningly beautiful and highly educated God bless them all.


September 19, 2022 19:41 - 1 minute - 1.39 MB

Living as an artist's muse you can understand the expression of The Doom in the room what artist's don't realise is that there ego's can be so burdensome to everyone else and probably has to be in order for them to achieve , this is usually why their muse's are usually so miserable. Whilst living with an artist as a muse I was painted with my own blood she thought it to be a wonderful contrast of colour red onto the stark white canvas my Anglo-Saxon skin reminiscent of the old English flag .


September 19, 2022 16:19 - 1 minute - 1.69 MB

A birthday poem for NENO it's called Black Rod because for the first time in Britain's 1000 year parliament's history the position is now held by a women this spiritual and temporal appointment of power is long overdue for a changing of the guard the willow may look soft and gentle but inside lies her heart of oak .


September 19, 2022 11:14 - 1 minute - 1.33 MB

When you get to fifty something plus tax and you're sporting those ashtray locks of the sexy silver fox you may be better forgetting the fifty shades of grey its time to put the sex pistols away.


September 19, 2022 07:59 - 1 minute - 1.84 MB

I was quite horrified to read that the human is responsible for the slaughter of three billion aninmals each day , i wrote the poem in a pompous manner after listening to a hunter talking about his blood sports, he belived it tobe his righteous privalage to kill similar to royalty who once regularly pleasured their pallets with the flesh of endangered animals with some still doing so today after buying a licence from secret African auction houses in many of these poorer countries gluttony and...


September 19, 2022 06:59 - 1 minute - 1.65 MB

A musing for a wonderful women we called Ann Summers due to her working there, she asked for a birthday card poem and caused me a writer's block which when I tried to explain she cursed me a look of pure disdain , so I wrote it along the lines of if I bumped into her serving at the Ann summers shop. Katie looks at all men with indifference and always takes fun from them , Bravo darling it's all we do so deserve.


September 18, 2022 21:04 - 1 minute - 1.58 MB

Emblazoned bright upon his breast he carries that noble heraldic crest , tis the colour of blood and fire be it a blessed response to his lovers desire, suspicion states that he was at the passion of christ , an there by thorny crown was blooded an blessed , is this why today he doth still sanctify the arrival of our christmas fest .


September 18, 2022 18:08 - 1 minute - 1.82 MB

A musing about the private member's bills passed with British Parliamentary pomposity it sounds like a serious aural atrocity but it's usually being diatribed by someone that's spieling through their own suppository .


September 18, 2022 17:13 - 2 minutes - 2.2 MB

The femme fatale overrides all of our rationale her swan song is the sound we hear as our love boat runs aground, the final pheromone is a scent of sulphur we smell as we slowly drowned .


September 18, 2022 15:48 - 2 minutes - 2.13 MB

Prostitution is one of the oldest professions in the world which was here before the four angels of Samuel it's about time the government took control of this sexual slavery let's face facts  the chancellor's been selling cigarettes and booze for hundred of years they're both forms of narcotics best not allow the criminals any room manoeuvre better to take over all their operations save these poor girls any more torture legalise their ancient profession too .


September 18, 2022 14:01 - 1 minute - 1.62 MB

Is vanity a sin or just the selfish substance we need in order to win ?.


September 18, 2022 11:19 - 1 minute - 1.38 MB

Similar to an Eskimo fishing through a hole in the ice one could easily imagine a soul catcher waiting patiently at the edge of a black hole in order to capture our very essence , then freeze drying us in the absolute zero of infinity giving him our plasma concentrate life , we'd be ready for a re-nucleation or reconstitution, and what better freeze drying facility than the perfectly vacuumed packaging plant of space .


September 18, 2022 10:13 - 1 minute - 1.7 MB

A poem written about my rolly Polly fat flat mate who lost a massive amount of weight becoming ever so serious and slim I've taken his place by becoming fat and happy obviously you do become the company you keep .


September 17, 2022 20:37 - 1 minute - 1.44 MB

Looking at my Godson Watching the Lion king I cast my mind back to childhood and when I saw a pathetic beast a lion that was used as a pet in a scrap yard chained, toothless, clawless and castrated, it died of pneumonia because of cold and cruelty terrible how we bring these beautiful beasts to suffer in our cold climates to become a caged curiosity .


September 17, 2022 18:41 - 1 minute - 1.74 MB

In the 1980s Yorkshire towns were all male prowess, which usually ment attempting a liquid suicide of drink each night to show your tribe what a man you  were It ended with some terrible casualties, the Yorkshire accent is extremely harsh at times and to most people I would think almost incomprehensible.


September 17, 2022 17:40 - 1 minute - 1.72 MB

A short sketch I wrote about a Christmas bash with the Old deaf relatives cooking programmes and war movies on alternative TV stations with their daughter trying to talk a little sense in between both of them .


September 17, 2022 14:45 - 2 minutes - 2.19 MB

A poem about the busiest train in the whole of Britain and Europe the 7.22 to from Woking to Waterloo a hundred million passengers pass through Waterloo each year which makes for some terrifying or tantalising flesh to flesh point's of view .


September 17, 2022 13:23 - 1 minute - 1.63 MB

A musing about an old friend who has now divorced and gone back onto the Mating sites looking for lust not realising that his old sex pistol has long since turned to rust , men of curtain age with faint hearts and feeble flesh really they need to be extremely careful I told one chum that his Bumble dating site might be better if it was called crumble due to the flaking dusty disposition of its clients.


September 17, 2022 12:23 - 53 seconds - 857 KB

A short minute musing about infecting your friends computer's with a virus and how they treat it as though you've infected them with a sexually transmitted STD .


September 16, 2022 21:03 - 1 minute - 584 KB

A poem about a miserable old neighbour called stan who once had everything a palace and a kingdom but then unfortunately lost everything and was reduced to a normal man alas such a tragedy to fall amonst that of we the mere mortal clan .


September 16, 2022 20:08 - 2 minutes - 2.16 MB

Hidden in her silver box were those secret letters of love from a dead lover who in a moment of war when passion was the fashion and she fed hers red and raw to his hungry dog of amour .


September 16, 2022 18:48 - 1 minute - 1.84 MB

Carrying a vicarious redemption on behalf of someone else is a burdensome weight the preachers daughter still carries hers each moment of every day a beautiful quiet soul who was given the sin substitution by her callous caretakers , her atonement isn't due any time soon.


September 16, 2022 16:45 - 54 seconds - 876 KB

A deadly sin this jade eyed Jekyll our secret  schadenfreude that hides within waiting to hatch out into its true reptilian skin .


September 16, 2022 15:00 - 2 minutes - 2.03 MB

A poem written for my father who was born in 1926 and now similar to an old model T ford he needs constant tinkering and maintenance to keep him running also I've done my best to copy his gasping Yorkshire speech ; born in the days of the horse and cart he started work at the age of twelve down in the mills on the east side of a steel river , he mentioned that not only were the steel dreys pulled by the huge shire horses but during the second world war they also used the might of the elephant...


September 15, 2022 20:21 - 4 minutes - 4.16 MB

A poem for super tramp who had a very good cure for halitosis panting out perfume after drinking your bathroom cabinet dry.


September 15, 2022 16:36 - 2 minutes - 2.61 MB

A poem for a dear friend of mine who's charismatic appeal with women is so legendary that it led to him receiving a pseudonym of The Valley Drive Lady Killer even whilst laid on the surgeons slab awaiting a serious operation he was still able to twirl the attention of a young nurse who was at the time wet shaving him of all body hair ready for his open heart surgery.