TERRY CREWS: Overcoming obstacles, radical reinvention, and a model for the new masculine.

Terry Crews

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0:00 Intro to Terry Crews

1:23 Lion’s Maine organic coffee, check out http://www.foursigmatic.com/Peak for 15% off

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4:33 Terry Crew’s episode begins

5:55 Coming out of an abusive household and art as a refuge

8:00 Athletics as a way out of Flint

9:20 Bet on me, being source for the family

10:23 Drawing teammates to make ends meet while in the NFL

12:50 Life after the NFL

13:12 From Alfa-male and friendships to the loss of identity

15:00 Deep depression, moving out of the pity party

16:35 Not seeing who we are, and stoping the descent

17:40 asking friends for money and moving beyond broke

19:14 Sweeping a factory floor and the magic of taking charge of your circumstance

20:22 Revisioning your low-point, beyond pride to self-responsibility

21:14 If anything needs to change it is on me, and making the hard stand in true friendship

22:20 The masculine sense of entitlement that is built in culturally

22:50 When pride prevents you from seeing things how they truly are

23:31 The lone male gong out their alone and dying in the pride of solitude

25:00 The caustic mix of religion and alcohol and the birth of shame

26:36 Pornography as an escape, and learning to have a double life to hold up the false-self

27:44 Becoming the false-self and descent into porn addiction

28:45 Wife- I don’t know you anymore, I am leaving. Facing rock-bottom

29:30 Facing you darkest secrets

29:44 Guilt and shame, and facing it by coming clean

30:10 Facing another rock bottom

31:50 Being alone with yourself, who are you really

32:12 Facing the shadow, claiming the liar, and moving beyond

32:50 Believing the lie

34:00 Changing your beliefs

34:14 That I was more valuable than my wife and kids

34:44 Facing your own shadow and confronting way relating to those you love the most

32:25 The cult of masculinity and de-programming

36:10 Growing up without a role model and a process of individuation birthing boys to men

36:44 Pimp-culture

37:00 “The Game” - keeping women off balance to manipulate and control

37:23 Bringing it back to psychology of slavery and pimp culture - and praising this toxic masculinity

38:00 The thing you believe is the things that is repeatedly discussed and shown - that is what you accept

38:42 A conscious state of questioning

39:15 The challenge of saying no to people, moving beyond people-pleaser

40:40 That is your power, the ability to say no, and yes! - the impeccability of your word

41:27 The seismic shift within

42:20 “The world can be an illusion… I found there were things that were wrong with me that I liked… and that is a very dangerous place to be”

43:55 “You are priceless already, there is nothing you have to do to get more value” - number one thing…. as a human being.

44:45 The opposite of creativity is competition

45:24 You need other people to be successful for you to be successful

46:33 “Creativity, you are the only person who can give what you got”

47:00 “You can only be creative when you know your value, when you know you are priceless”

47:20 The fallacy of being more valuable - “when you become your wins, you inevitably must become your losses, and when you becoming losses thats where the challenges come in”

48:35 The cycle of shame

49:00 When you know you are good just the way you are, then you can do anything

49:34 The true success is just doing what you want

50:14 The power of authenticity and creativity

51:00 And that is where I choose to live, on my own planet

51:20 Choosing your atmosphere

52:11 Being at affect to other people’s agendas, vs being at cause

53:00 To know I am one person

53:23 Life gets better!

54:00 When you are free from the paradigm I am not jumping back in!

55:00 “I stand for love, I stand for strength, I stand for being a real man”

56:10 “Its impossible to realize an outside, without first realizing an inside!”

56:54 Death as a moving up

57:19 The sun does not go down, we go around the sun, its an illusion…

58:00 My spirit, it ain’t going nowhere

58:47 Acknowledgement of Terry Crews

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