Paleo Bites
313 episodes - English - Latest episode: 11 days ago - ★★★★★ - 15 ratingsWelcome to Paleo Bites, the weekly podcast hosted by Matthew Donald where we make dumb jokes, reference pop culture, derail like crazy, and oh yeah, discuss and rate dinosaurs and other prehistoric animals. Each episode Matthew and a rotating set of guest co-hosts talk about a different genus of primeval critter, explain basic stats, exchange plenty of banter, barely fact-check, and at the end, rate the creature one out of 65 million for any reason, including but not limited to sexiness, mana, and dexterity. So join Matthew and his friends as we embark on this prehistoric odyssey and review the dinosaurs from Aardonyx to Zuul as well as many other extinct beasts, entertaining folks while undoubtedly making serious paleontologists weep. Musical sting by Magnus Ringblom from Epidemic Sound.
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Episodes
Fasolasuchus, the Crocodile of Tomas Fasola
April 16, 2024 06:00 - 23 minutes - 26.1 MB(image source: https://www.nationalgeographic.com/science/article/triassic-bites-and-a-carnivore-conundrum) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Ben O’Regan discuss Fasolasuchus, the biggest terrestrial non-dinosaur predator of all time. What a hyper-specific superlative. I bet I’m the biggest human named Matthew that wrote a dinosaur sci-fi series called Megazoic. Except probably not, there’s a lot of Matthews out there. From the Mid Triassic, this 35-foot rauisuchian got a big bit of ci...
Alaskacephale, the Head of Alaska
April 09, 2024 06:00 - 23 minutes - 22.6 MB(image source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alaskacephale) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Lawrence Mack discuss Alaskacephale, a northern dinosaur that somehow had enough minor differences to escape being lumped into the genus Pachycephalosaurus, but the wildly different and far more spiky Dracorex and Stygimoloch didn’t. Yeah, I’m never letting that go. From the Late Cretaceous, this 8-foot pachycephalosaurid lived alongside the other arctic dinosaurs like Pachyrhinosaurus and Nanu...
Simosuchus, the Pug-Nosed Crocodile
April 02, 2024 06:00 - 23 minutes - 21.4 MB(image source: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/583708801714650808/) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Laura Owsley discuss Simosuchus, an adorable little burrowing critter that despite its herbivory and cuddly appearance was actually an ancient crocodylomorph. I bet its death rolls would be so cute. From the Late Cretaceous, this 3-foot notosuchian lived alongside some big frogs and mammals as well as dinosaurs in their Madagascar home, which sounds nice. I wager they all got along and t...
Tenontosaurus, the Sinew Lizard
March 26, 2024 06:00 - 27 minutes - 25.2 MB(image source: https://alphynix.tumblr.com) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Tenontosaurus, a poor schmuck of a dinosaur whose entire existence seems to be cannon fodder for packs of Deinonychus. Hence why I chose this picture for the episode image, because it’s funny seeing the tables turned. Mwuahahaha. From the Early Cretaceous, this 20-foot basal ornithopod was also notable in having a really long tail, which really would have been useful in fighting off thos...
Anchisaurus, the Intermediate Lizard
March 19, 2024 06:00 - 25 minutes - 25.2 MB(image source: https://dinosaurpictures.org/Anchisaurus-pictures) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Lexi Ryan discuss Anchisaurus, a long-necked lizard thing of a dinosaur that had far more interesting ancestors and even more interesting descendants. It really was ‘intermediate’ in how mid it was. Boo. From the Early Jurassic, this 10-foot basal sauropodomorph was the basis behind a familial vow to track the owner of its footprints, a task started by a paleontologist father but complet...
Maiasaura, the Good Mother Lizard
March 12, 2024 06:00 - 26 minutes - 26.7 MB(image source: https://pixels.com/featured/maiasaura-and-nest-phil-wilson.html) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Lawrence Mack discuss Maiasaura, a real mommy of a dinosaur in that it was the first one with direct evidence of parental care. A real nurturer, Maiasaura. I could use that. No, I don’t have mommy issues. From the Late Cretaceous, this 30-foot saurolophine hadrosaurid seemingly put leaves on its eggs and fed them with its beak when they hatched, which is nice. Again, I cou...
Simbakubwa, the Great Lion
March 05, 2024 07:00 - 25 minutes - 24.6 MB(image source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Simbakubwa) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Laura Owsley discuss Simbakubwa, possibly the largest terrestrial mammalian predator of all time and the true holder of the title of Lion King. Naaaaaants ingonyamaaaa bagithiiiii baba sithi uhm ingonyamaaaa! Disney, making children scat faux Swahili since 1994. From the Early Miocene, this 10-foot hyaenodont had a slashing bite and could potentially bring down giant elephants and rhinos. The ult...
Australopithecus, the Southern Ape
February 27, 2024 07:00 - 29 minutes - 32.4 MB(image source: https://bit.ly/3T1rkyC) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Ben O’Regan discuss Australopithecus, one of our definitive ancestors and the first to walk upright, which is kind of a big deal. I don’t think I could handle walking on my knuckles all day, so thank you, Australopithecus. From the Late Pliocene, this 4-foot-tall hominid ate fruit and meat and overall just kinda aped about. You ever watched the Planet of the Apes movies? Then you’ve seen Australopithecus. Please i...
Megalosaurus, the Great Lizard
February 20, 2024 07:00 - 27 minutes - 26.9 MB(image source: https://dinosaurpictures.org/Megalosaurus-pictures) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Megalosaurus on this very special day, as exactly 200 years ago on this date Megalosaurus was officially the first described dinosaur, marking two centuries of dinosaur knowledge! Awesome! Oh yeah, the animal is cool too, whatever. From the Middle Jurassic, this 30-foot theropod used to have hundreds of different species in its genus before settling with Megalosaur...
Basilosaurus, the King Lizard
February 13, 2024 07:00 - 28 minutes - 35.4 MB(image source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Basilosaurus) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Allen Brooks discuss Basilosaurus, a ginormous flesh-eating whale with a bulbous body and tiny back legs. Bet you didn’t know your mom was featured in this podcast, huh? From the Late Eocene, this 60-foot cetacean had a dinosaur-esque name due to its serpentine-esque body, which I think shouldn’t be allowed. Only dinosaurs should end in ‘saurus’ just as only mammals should end in ‘therium’! Non...
Proa, the Prow of Val de Arino
February 06, 2024 07:00 - 26 minutes - 25.7 MB(image source: https://metode.org/issues/monographs/the-dinosaurs-of-the-maestrat-basin.html) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Laura Owsley discuss Proa, a dinosaur who lived in Spain and is on display in a huge museum there called Dinopolis, a place I have promptly scheduled on my calendar to visit on a moments’ notice! Oh wait, plane tickets are expensive. Damn. From the Early Cretaceous, this 22-foot iguanodont was chosen by our production team by using a random dinosaur generator ...
Simocyon, the Short-Snouted Dog
January 30, 2024 07:00 - 22 minutes - 20.4 MB(image source: https://www.nationalgeographic.com/science/article/the-other-pandas-thumb) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Lexi Ryan discuss Simocyon, a creature that looks like a cougar and whose name says it’s a dog but is more closely related to red pandas. That’s a running joke on this show, I swear. “It looks like a baboon, eats like a llama, but its closest relatives are actually… cuttlefish.” From the Early Pliocene, this 7-foot carnivoran mammal is from a previously wide-rangin...
Paranthropus, the One Alongside Man
January 23, 2024 07:00 - 26 minutes - 24.8 MB(Image source: https://www.science.org/content/article/one-ancient-human-relative-use-early-stone-tools) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Ben O’Regan discuss Paranthropus, one of our ancestors’ relatives that didn’t fully make the transition into cavemen and died off before they could see what humanity would become. They were the lucky ones. From the Late Pliocene, this 4-foot-tall hominid used simple tools like sticks and rocks and plucked fruit off of trees and basically were just m...
Ambulocetus, the Walking Whale
January 16, 2024 07:00 - 26 minutes - 33.6 MB(image source: https://dinopedia.fandom.com/wiki/Ambulocetus) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Allen Brooks discuss Ambulocetus, a walking whale that might not have actually walked all that much, but boy it could swim! So a whale then, basically. A whale with feet. Ehhh. From the Late Eocene, this 10-foot cetacean swam through the rivers of Pakistan and chomped fish, crocodiles, small mammals, and whatever else dared get in its way. I bet I could take it though, personally. How hard c...
Coahuilaceratops, the Horned Face of Coahuila
January 09, 2024 07:00 - 27 minutes - 27.3 MB(image source: https://dinosaurpictures.org/Coahuilaceratops-pictures) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Coahuliaceratops, one of the few dinosaurs we have evidence of from Mexico due to something… explosive happening there at the end of the Cretaceous that wiped out most of the fossils. And no, it wasn’t the aftermath of a burrito dinner. From the Late Cretaceous, this 16-foot chasmosaurine ceratopsian had the longest horns of any member of its family, so that’s ...
Coelurosauravus, the Hollow Lizard Grandfather
January 02, 2024 07:00 - 17 minutes - 17.4 MB(image source: https://sciifii.fandom.com/wiki/Coelurosauravus) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Natasha Krech discuss Coelurosauravus, the reptiles’ first of many, many attempts to get the hell off the ground and into the air. It seems like reptiles might be playing a geologic time scale level game of The Floor Is Lava. From the Late Permian, this 1-foot neodiapsid was unfortunately one of the losers of the Permian extinction event, where the whole world played a literal game of The ...
Prognathodon, the Forejaw Tooth
December 26, 2023 07:00 - 29 minutes - 30 MB(image source: https://bethzaiken.com/royal-saskatchewan-museum-prognathodon) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Lexi Ryan discuss Prognathodon, a very unmerry creature that only has its episode released near Christmas due to the predetermined release schedule. Jingle bells! Chomp. From the Late Cretaceous, this 45-foot mosasaurid was smaller than its more famous cousin but had a far stronger bite, which means it could open presents real easily… yeah, I’m forcing this Christmas theme up...
Pakicetus, the Pakistani Whale
December 19, 2023 07:00 - 27 minutes - 34.3 MB(image source: https://eartharchives.org/articles/the-evolution-of-whales/) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Allen Brooks discuss Pakicetus, the very first cetacean and thus very first whale, so that’s neat I guess. Evolution and stuff. Intermediary fossils. Woo. From the Early Eocene, this 5-foot artiodactyl had many features of both land-dwelling and aquatic animals, which sounds indecisive if you ask me. Land or water, pick one! I mean, I suppose it eventually did. So that’s good I...
Eurapteryx, the Broad-Billed Moa
December 12, 2023 07:00 - 18 minutes - 18 MB(image source: https://a-dinosaur-a-day.com/post/185693540635/euryapteryx-curtus) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Don Hall discuss Euryapteryx, another one of those giant birds the Maori people had to deal with when they migrated to New Zealand. They had a rough time. The birds, not the people. From the Early Holocene, this 3-foot-tall ratite laid relatively giant eggs and was hunted to extinction by the humans. Because humans. We’re a blight upon the earth. COVID-19 was a nice try, ...
Megamonodontium, the Giant Trapdoor Spider
December 05, 2023 07:00 - 22 minutes - 21.7 MB(image source: https://novataxa.blogspot.com/2023/09/megamonodontium.html) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Natasha Krech discuss Megamonodontium, the most nope nope to have ever noped. A giant spider lunging in a hole in Australia? Nope, nope, nope. From the Late Miocene, this 2-inch spider trapped and ate giant dinosaurs and sunk its venomous fangs into the necks of cavemen… okay, not really, it more likely hunted insects and small vertebrates and was overall just another harmless a...
Tropeognathus, the Keel-Jawed One
November 28, 2023 07:00 - 22 minutes - 22.3 MB(image source: https://dinosaurpictures.org/Tropeognathus-pictures) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Ben O’Regan discuss Tropeognathus, a genus split off from Ornithocheirus, well-known from that Walking with Dinosaurs episode where one of them was too old to get laid. From the Early Cretaceous, this 25-foot-wingspan pterosaur lived in Brazil alongside frugivore Tapejara, also depicted in that same episode where one of them got sprayed on by water too much to get laid. Quality televis...
Anzu, the Mesopotamian Bird Demon
November 21, 2023 07:00 - 16 minutes - 17.3 MB(image source: https://www.deviantart.com/tuomaskoivurinne/art/Saurian-Anzu-778336693) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Don Hall discuss Anzu, a dinosaur that looks so damn much like a bird it’s hard to believe it’s not in the clade of theropods that evolved into them. Them dinos really wanted them feathers. From the late Cretaceous, this 13-foot oviraptorosaur lived alongside some famous heavy-hitters like T. rex and Triceratops, and may I say the name Anzu really stands out among th...
Han solo, the Lone Chinese Trilobite
November 14, 2023 07:00 - 13 minutes - 12.9 MB(image source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Agnostida) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Han solo, an actually real genus and species of animal because paleontologists, believe it or not, are nerds. From the Early Ordavician, this 2-inch trilobite may not have looked like much, but it’s got it where it counts, kid. Yeah, we make a bunch of forced Star Wars references in this episode… oh, I’ve got a bad feeling about this. Want to further support the show? Sign ...
Platyceramus, the Broad Shell
November 07, 2023 07:00 - 20 minutes - 20 MB(image source: https://dontmesswithdinosaurs.com/?p=2122) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Natasha Krech discuss Platyceramus, the biggest clam in the entire paleontological record, which sounds like something one of those tourist traps on I-70 would claim to have if you ask me. From the Late Cretaceous, this 10-foot bivalve got eaten by giant turtles and had highly enlarged pearls within its shells… oh, now you’re interested, huh? Now that there’s money involved? I swear, late stage ...
Zuul, the Destroyer of Shins
October 31, 2023 06:00 - 15 minutes - 15.3 MB(image source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zuul) Happy Halloween! Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Frankyansteilert (the sewn-together bodies of previous co-hosts reanimated after their unfortunate deaths) discuss Zuul, a dinosaur indeed named after the Ghostbusters demon dog, because why not at this point? From the Late Cretaceous, this 20-foot ankylosaur had the biggest tail club of any of its kind in North America and had some fossilized scale imprints uncovered, which we defini...
Ectopistes, the Passenger Pigeon
October 24, 2023 06:00 - 22 minutes - 24.3 MB(image source: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/things-of-beauty-i-like-to-see--543528248785595561/) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host and Matt’s dad Don Hall discuss Ectopistes, another great example of human-caused extinction because we didn’t depress our listeners enough with the Dodo and Tasmanian Tiger episodes. From the Late Pliocene to the Early Holocene, this 1.5-foot columbid bird used to have flocks in the billions before being shot, batted, and netted by greedy and terrible Eur...
Moeritherium, the Beast of Lake Moeris
October 17, 2023 06:00 - 25 minutes - 23.3 MB(image source: https://www.thoughtco.com/moeritherium-lake-moeris-beast-1093246) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Laura Owsley discuss Moeritherium, a pig-hippo-tapir thing that was actually closer related to elephants than any of those other creatures, because the only thing nature is consistent at is being inconsistent. From the Late Eocene, this 6-foot proboscid lived in the mangrove swamps of its Egyptian home while blissfully unaware of the bleak desert it would become a few mino...
Moeritherium, the Beast of Like Moeris
October 17, 2023 06:00 - 25 minutes - 23.3 MB(image source: https://www.thoughtco.com/moeritherium-lake-moeris-beast-1093246) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Laura Owsley discuss Moeritherium, a pig-hippo-tapir thing that was actually closer related to elephants than any of those other creatures, because the only thing nature is consistent at is being inconsistent. From the Late Eocene, this 6-foot proboscid lived in the mangrove swamps of its Egyptian home while blissfully unaware of the bleak desert it would become a few mino...
Suuwassea, the Ancient Thunder
October 10, 2023 06:00 - 23 minutes - 23.5 MB(image source: https://dino.fandom.com/wiki/Suuwassea) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Natasha Krech discuss Suuwassea, a dinosaur named after terms in the language of the Native American Crow Tribe just in time for Indigenous People's Day, because I'm really good at planning these things. It's not a coincidence, I swear. Pinkily so. From the Late Jurassic, this 45-foot dicraeosaurid sauropod was still plenty big but definitely one of the smaller long-necked dinosaurs of Jurassic Nort...
Sinosauropteryx, the Chinese Lizard Wing
October 03, 2023 06:00 - 21 minutes - 19.7 MB(image source: https://bit.ly/3PEeLaG) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Lexi Ryan discuss Sinosauropteryx, the first non-avian dinosaur identified with feathers and thus the one to blame for the Jurassic Park style scaly raptors going out of fashion. Feathers can be monstrous too, guys! Just look at cassowaries. Or don't, they'll kill you. Kill you dead. And then disembowel you. Yeah. From the Early Cretaceous, this 3-foot compsognathid theropod was also the first dinosaur that we've ...
Raphus, the Dodo
September 26, 2023 06:00 - 23 minutes - 23.6 MB(image source: https://pixels.com/featured/3-dodo-bird-spencer-sutton.html?product=poster) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Raphus, also known as the dodo and a shining example of anthropogenic extinction. That’s when humans completely kill a species, just in case you wanted a punch in the gut today. From the Early Holocene, this 3-foot tall columbid bird is one of the prime candidates for scientists to try and resurrect Jurassic Park style, which would make for ...
Deinonychus, the Terrible Claw
September 19, 2023 06:00 - 27 minutes - 29.5 MB(image source: https://images.dinosaurpictures.org/Deinonychus_ewilloughby_2931.jpg) Host Matthew Donald and very special guest co-host Jason Singleton discuss Deinonychus, the one whose titular claw sparked the Dinosaur Revolution like a slash heard around the world. That’s an American Revolution reference, that joke. Know your history, even if it’s probably mostly propaganda. From the Mid Cretaceous, this 11-foot dromaeosaurid had the biggest beef with poor ol’ Tenontosaurus, or should I...
Cygnus falconeri, the Giant Swan
September 12, 2023 06:00 - 27 minutes - 26.1 MB(image source: https://bit.ly/3Rhfwc6) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Laura Owsley discuss Cygnus falconeri, the biggest swan ever that towered over elephants… although to be fair the elephants on the island it lived on were dwarf elephants, so it’s kind of cheating. From the Late Pleistocene, this 10-foot-wingspan bird was undoubtedly the biggest asshole and probably bullied those poor little elephants to extinction. You ever encountered a swan? They’re assholes! Even the regular-s...
Homotherium, the Same Beast
September 05, 2023 06:00 - 22 minutes - 23.3 MB(image source: https://fanon.fandom.com/wiki/Homotherium_latidens_(SciiFii)) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Natasha Krech discuss Homotherium, another one of those saber-toothed cats early humans had to deal with because we’ve never had enough problems. From the Mid Pliocene to the Late Pleistocene, this 5-foot machairodont felid was more like a saber-toothed cougar than a saber-toothed tiger, as it was a pursuit hunter that could run down prey rather than merely ambushing them. The...
Podokesaurus, the Swift-Footed Lizard
August 29, 2023 06:00 - 27 minutes - 28.5 MB(image source: https://bit.ly/3PfmRaG) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Lexi Ryan discuss Podokesaurus, the state dinosaur of Massachusetts, which really shows the lack of good fossils there and their sheer desperation in having a dino representative. From the Early Jurassic, this 3-foot coelophysid theropod was the first dinosaur discovered and described by a woman, which is definitely cool, although I bet Mary Ann Mantell is seething in the annals of history at her husband taking the...
Spinosaurus, the Spined Lizard
August 22, 2023 06:00 - 52 minutes - 51.1 MB(image source: “Spinosaurus Through the Decades” by Mario Lanzas) Happy 200 episodes! Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Spinosaurus, a creature with so many different updates changing it up constantly it’s practically a modern video game. Was it a biped or a quadruped? Was it terrestrial or aquatic? Did it have a sail or a fin? Did it have a trunk like an elephant seal? Okay, that last one I made up, but hey, you never know. From the Mid Cretaceous, this 50-foot th...
Perucetus, the Peruvian Whale
August 15, 2023 06:00 - 26 minutes - 25.9 MB(image source: Alberto Gennari/Nature via AP) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Laura Owsley discuss Perucetus, potentially the biggest animal ever because prehistory needs to one-up the modern day at every opportunity. Those blue whales really thought their crown was safe, didn’t they? Pity. From the Late Eocene, this 65-foot basilosaurid whale was discovered just a few weeks before this episode’s release, so we cranked this episode out fast because by golly, it’s cool. It’s big. I li...
Thrinaxodon, the Trident Tooth
August 08, 2023 06:00 - 26 minutes - 29.4 MB(image source: https://ideas.fandom.com/wiki/Thrinaxodon_(SciiFii)) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Ben O’Regan discuss Thrinaxodon, a stem mammal that did not have little pitchforks or sea-ruling weapons in their mouths, so they’re very inaccurately named. I question these so-called scientists sometimes. From the Early Triassic, this 3-foot cynodont was one of the survivors of the Great Dying, AKA the Permian Extinction, AKA the worst time to be on Earth in all of its history other ...
Haikouichthys, the Fish from Haikou District, in Kunming China
August 01, 2023 06:00 - 17 minutes - 18.6 MB(image source: https://prehistoric-life.fandom.com/wiki/Haikouichthys) Host Matthew Donald, and guest Natasha Krech talk, Haikouichthys. An early chordate, or perhaps something weirder, we just don’t know yet. From the Cambrian, this 1-inch backboned fish-thing, lived early in time. As you’ve surely learned, this whole flippin’ episode, is all Haiku form. Even the title fits, and the description itself, and the written stats. Yet this is Chinese, not Japanese like Haikus, so it’s wrong and...
Cryolophosaurus, the Cold Crested Lizard
July 25, 2023 06:00 - 21 minutes - 21.3 MB(image source: https://bit.ly/3OtbH1P) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Cryolophosaurus, the first dinosaur described and named from Antarctica. That’s pretty cool. Haha, geddit? GEDDIT?! You get it. From the Early Jurassic, this 22-foot neotheropod lived when the continent was still kind of nice and full of trees and ferns, kind of like Alaska in the summer. Ugh, can you imagine the mosquitoes though?! John Hammond should have searched for them in Antarctica; I’...
Rhabdodon, the Fluted Tooth
July 18, 2023 06:00 - 22 minutes - 21.4 MB(image source: https://bit.ly/44PPyQG) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Cici Eilert discuss Rhabdodon, the Iguanodon equivalent of the Maastrichtian age and an archetypal example of insular gigantism. None of that statement made any sense to dinosaur or biology normies, I’m sure. From the Late Cretaceous, this 20-foot ornithopod lived in the European islands around the Hateg basin and had to deal with giant azhdarchid pterosaurs plucking its young off the ground on occasion. Sounds li...
Mononykus, the Single-Clawed One
July 11, 2023 06:00 - 29 minutes - 30.7 MB(image source: https://dinopedia.fandom.com/wiki/Mononykus) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Lexi Ryan discuss Mononykus, a dinosaur that was really good at poking and pretty much nothing else with those singular claws of theirs. They could point, poke, and pork. That’s it. Good night, everyone. From the Late Cretaceous, this 3-foot alvarezsaurid probably lived like an anteater picking bugs out of logs with its claws and its long tongue. Its tongue didn’t fossilize though, so that’s p...
Ophthalmosaurus, the Eye Lizard
July 04, 2023 06:00 - 28 minutes - 31.8 MB(image source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ophthalmosaurus) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Ben O’Regan discuss Ophthalmosaurus, an eye-catcher of a creature that sees the seas with optimal precision, and other eye-related jokes. From the Late Jurassic, this 16-foot ichthyosaur probably used its massive eyes to catch schools of fish in deep waters, meaning it used its pupils to catch pupils! Geddit?! Yeah, that one was a stretch. Required some real yoga to work. Have you seen me do...
Lagosuchus, the Rabbit Crocodile
June 27, 2023 06:00 - 26 minutes - 26.7 MB(image source: https://www.sciencephoto.com/contributor/jsi/) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Lagosuchus, a long-legged little lunatic that was named like a crocodile but is actually closer related to dinosaurs… then again dinosaurs are often named like they’re lizards when they’re patently not. From the Early Triassic, this 2-foot archosaur was not related to rabbits either despite the name, nor does it look like one. And it also wasn’t found near the city of L...
Transylvanosaurus, the Lizard from Across the Forest
June 20, 2023 06:00 - 19 minutes - 19.3 MB(image source: https://www.sci.news/paleontology/transylvanosaurus-platycephalus-11423.html) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Cici Eilert discuss Transylvanosaurus, a dinosaur with a name far scarier than this cute little critter would suggest, but I suppose Romanian means vampires, am I right? From the Late Cretaceous, this 6-foot rhabdodontid lived in an island paradise alongside some other miniaturized dinosaurs with their only fear being the giant pterosaurs that would swoop in fr...
Tsaagan, the White Monster
June 13, 2023 06:00 - 22 minutes - 22.3 MB(image source: Beasts of the Mesozoic action figure line) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Lawrence Mack discuss Tsaagan, a raptor from Mongolia that is decidedly not Velociraptor for some reason isn’t due to some minor differences in the skull or whatever. And yet Dracorex… ugh, forget it. From the Late Cretaceous, this 5-foot dromaeosaur got its name from a local Mongolian term for “white monster,” which would be a pretty accurate term if this thing was found in Europe with a ship f...
Dacentrurus, the One with the Tail Full of Points
June 06, 2023 06:00 - 22 minutes - 22.2 MB(image source: https://dinopedia.fandom.com/wiki/Dacentrurus) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Dacentrurus, a dinosaur from Europe that had a bunch of points at its end and a set of symmetrical plates on its front, kind of like if a dinner table was a dinosaur. From the Late Jurassic, this 30-foot stegosaur is one of the best known of its family from Europe, and also is incredibly awkward to say. No word should ever have “ruru” in it. Except for the Kanohi Ruru, ...
Peltephilus, the Armor Lover
May 30, 2023 06:00 - 21 minutes - 21.4 MB(image source: https://dinopedia.fandom.com/wiki/Peltephilus) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Cici Eilert discuss Peltephilus, a large armadillo with the squarest ass you’ve ever seen. Seriously, there’s just flesh and fur one inch and then none the next. From the Oligocene epoch, this 6-foot xenathran mammal was thought to be a predator at first until they realized it was like regular armadillos and ate bugs or whatever. Or rolled into balls. Except this one couldn’t; look at its bi...
Diplodocus, the Double-Beamed One
May 23, 2023 06:00 - 23 minutes - 26.5 MB(image source: https://a-z-animals.com/animals/diplodocus/) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Ben O’Regan discuss Diplodocus, the longest of long boys and the absorber of the awesome but sadly now dubious genus Seismosaurus. Earthquake lizard go kaput. Sad. From the Late Jurassic, this 100-foot sauropod lived in the golden age of its family with so many damn longneck dinosaurs that it’s hard to keep them all straight. Why is Supersaurus still valid if Seismo isn’t? Sorry, it’s a bit of...
Mammut, the Mastodon
May 16, 2023 06:00 - 28 minutes - 28.4 MB(image source: https://www.pnas.org/doi/10.1073/pnas.2208044119) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Lawrence Mack discuss Mammut, also known as the American mastodon because this is one of those creatures that has a generic name as well as a scientific name, like why we called lions lions instead of P. leo like we do T. rex. From the Late Pliocene, this 10-foot-tall mammutid isn’t really closely related to mammoths but gets confused with them a bunch, which makes sense as they look real...