#77 - Does Walgreens Sell Molly?

His name was Skip. Lived over on Elm, had a wife, a couple of kids, ya know? Not too sharp, I mean, hey the guy's 40 years old, he's wearing a paper hat and he's making cherry Cokes, it's a cinch he's not running for governor, right? Anyway, it got hot that summer, I remember it got REAL hot. It was sweltering. Ya know that heat where your underwear sweats and it crawls up the...anyway, it's hot, okay? And they start...they start smelling this, this really vile stench over on Elm and they figure it's coming from Skip's place. And no one wants to say anything, I mean, what do you do, go knock on the guy's door..."Hi, your house stinks"? So people are trying to ignore it, right? They're trying to pretend it isn't happening. And you know those pine things? They're trying to cover up with those pine things that you can put in cars. People are hanging those on their porches. The state health inspector shows up. They go over, they talk to Skip, he says he's got a sump pump problem. They leave. Hey, the guy's got a sewer problem, he says he'll look after it, everything's okay, right? Wrong. A couple hours later there's smoke pouring out of the windows of Skip's house. The firemen show up, they go into Skip's house. You know what they find? Skip's family, dead. Murdered...by Skip...weeks earlier...with an ice pick. Yeah, the guy killed his own family with an ice pick. Yeah, just put them in the cool basement, covered them up with a sheet and went back to making ice cream treats for the townsfolk. Only thing...Skip didn't count on there being a big heat wave that summer. You know what that was that all those people were smelling over on Elm, Ricky? Skip's family's bodies, decomposing in the summer heat. Yeah, apparently one day Skip made just made one too many lemon phosphates...El Snappo.




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