MM181 - Wrestling with the Cynic

When we grow older, we find ourselves having to Wrestle with the Cynic, and I'm not talking about wrestling with an external cynic. I'm talking about wrestling with the internal cynic, the one within you.

[INTRO]

♫ Trenches by Pop Evil ♫

*Alex*

Welcome to Morning Mindset. A daily dose of practical wit and wisdom with a professional educator & trainer, Amazon best selling author, United States Marine, Television, and Radio host, Paul G. Markel. Each episode will focus on positive and productive ways to strengthen your mindset and help you improve your relationships, career goals, and overall well-being. Please welcome your host; Paul G. Markel.

*Professor Paul*

Hello and welcome back to Morning Mindset. I am your host Paul Markel. Thank you one more time, yes, once again, thank you for joining me today. I hope that you're having a wonderful day so far whenever that happens to be I know many of you listen to this on your morning commute or while you're sipping your morning coffee, which is a great way to consume this.

-

But if you have to listen to it in the evening or the afternoon, that's cool, too. Let's talk about Wrestling with the Cynic. Now, what does it mean to be a Cynic or Cynical? A Cynic is a person who has lost their faith in their fellow man, and they believe that all people are motivated by greed or self-interest and that's really not untrue.

-

The human animal is motivated by their needs and desires, right? Human beings are animals and they need water, and they need food and they need shelter and they need, you know, basic human requirements. But they also need psychological requirements as well. They need affirmation, they need love, they need acceptance.

-

But when we grow older, or the older we grow- and I find myself having to wrestle with the cynic, and I'm not talking about wrestling with an external cynic. I'm talking about wrestling with the internal cynic. It doesn't take very long or doesn't take very many experiences where you are abused or you were burned or you were used or you were tricked or you feel like someone just used you for what they could get and then they discarded you and left.

-

It's pretty quick, or it's pretty easy to become a cynic, very rapidly I should say, and that's natural. It's a natural human response and I suppose that one of the things that I wrestle with on a daily basis is how to keep that cynic in check now, I guess they you can say that there is a healthy cynicism.

-

I don't know if you've ever heard of that person has a healthy dose of cynicism. That is they are wary of the wants or desires or matching nations of other people before they just jump in with both feet. They said back and say "Hmm, is this a good idea and is this person really have my best interest at heart, or they only thinking about themselves and to hell with me?"

-

That's a great question. I've had that in my life, I've had people who you know, came to me and it seemed as if by their words that they wanted to assist me or aid me. Be my friend or be my business associate or what have you and then as time went by I discovered that they were all about what they could get whenever they could get it and the hell with the consequences and to hell with me.

-

I think many of us, I would be surprised if there's someone in my audience is listening that has not had a similar experience. So, how do we deal with that? How do we not become completely and totally cynical? Think, it's a good question. One way, and I believe that this is a very positive way, when you are when you're a cynic, often the thing that is made you a cynic or made you feel that way has been either betrayal or the fact that you were lied to or that you were used or that someone whether they lied to you or not.

-

Basically, they took what they could get from you and then you discarded you personally or your feelings or what have you, and when that happens after that happens? How do you feel? How does it make you feel? It makes you feel, well, generally poorly about yourself. You're angry at yourself, you think “How could I allow this to happen to myself?”, and you develop a poor self-image. It's very easy to develop a poor self-image after you have been used after you have been taken advantage of.

-

You feel like "Well, maybe I deserve to be taken advantage of" or "Maybe I'm just a dummy" or "Maybe that's all I have in my life" or "That's all that I have come to me, is to be used or taken advantage of" and I'm telling you that doesn't have to be the case. If you find yourself, falling into that cynical trap or if you are wrestling with the inner cynic.

-

One thing that I would suggest to you is that you focus on your own development. You're like but isn't that selfish pole? I'm not telling you to focus on your own personal development at the expense of others. I'm telling you to focus on your own self-development by your own investment by your own effort.

-

Whether it means going to the gym more often or starting to go to the gym, whether it means eating better, or eating more healthy, or more sensibly. Whether it means investing your time and effort in a new Talent or skill. You may have always wanted to learn how to,  Blank. Fill in the blank, to do woodworking, or to do needlepoint, or you remember when your grandmother we used to sit as a child and watch your grandmother knit and it seemed like there wasn't anything that your grandmother couldn't make out of, you know, with two needles and yarn or crochet hook and yarn and you always wished you would have learned how to do that.

-

Well to start, say that you always wanted to play an instrument, whatever that instrument happened to be. I don't care if you're 52 years old, I don't care if you're 60 years old. I don't care if you're 48 or 39 or what have you, if you're living and breathing you can do that. Instead of worrying about other people or investing your mental energy worrying about others and how others are seeking to take advantage of you, or take advantage of a situation or what have you.

-

What I want you to do instead is I want you to focus on self-development, not self-development by taking advantage of other people were cheating or lying or what-have-you. I'm talking about self-development through actual effort, whether it involves reading or study or physical exercise or physical movements or learning new skills.

-

Do it, pick one. Choose it and learn it, and you'll find that you're not so much concerned with what other people think and say and do if you are pleased and happy with your own progress and people will see that in you. People will see that self-confidence, they will see that and they're probably less likely to try and take advantage of you.

-

It's difficult to wrestle with the inner cynic. Everyone does, I do and I would be surprised if you don't as well, but we can't let it win. If we're going to be living in this world, if we're going to be occupying space on planet Earth we need to do so in a positive and productive fashion and sitting around thinking about how the world constantly is trying to take advantage of it is not a way to do that.

-

So, next time you find yourself wrestling with that inner cynic you're feeling cynical. Take some time, think about working on yourself your own personal development your own achievements. You're still alive. You're still taking in oxygen you're moving around on this planet. You can achieve you can do new things.

-

You can learn new skills new talents do it. Stop worrying about what other people have done or will do because you can't control that but you can't control yourself. Alright, ladies and gentlemen, I am your host Paul Markel and I will talk to you again real soon.

[OUTRO]

♫ Trenches by Pop Evil ♫

*Alex*

Thank you for spending time with us today. To get show notes, submit a topic request, for more from your host Paul G. Markel, visit MorningMindsetPodcast.com. That’s MorningMindsetPodcast.com. Please leave a review of this podcast on your favorite podcast player, we appreciate your time & effort, and we look forward to reading your honest feedback.