Hello Mama who may have had her share of disappointing Christmases…

Welcome to the 3rd episode in a series called Cultivating Christmas Calm – How to Have a Holiday Season You Actually Enjoy. You might want to go back and listen to Episode 6 and 7 – two under 15-minute episodes that will help you navigate a calmer and happier holiday season. 

I’m the mom who worked way too hard to make everyone in my family’s Christmas wishes come true. Anybody else? 

In a nutshell,

I bought way too many gifts and collapsed into bed at about 4 am Christmas morning. 

I did “all the things” – class parties, baking, baked for them, assemblies, services, events, and activities.

I bedecked every inch of my home. 

I loved most of it. The problem was I believed if I didn’t do it all, Christmas would be disappointing, to me or someone I loved. 


As a result, Christmas was exhausting and depleting. And no matter what lengths I went to, Christmas was disappointing to someone. 

In previous episodes, I’ve asked questions to help you determine your highest holiday priorities.  

And hopefully you’ve discovered the one word that can make this your happiest holiday season yet – NO! 

I want to return to the topic of disappointment. Often our disappointments in life are based on dashed expectations. We have something in mind, and we may not even know it. But when our reality doesn’t match up with that picture in our minds, we feel disappointed. I’d like to suggest a few things you can do this Christmas to manage expectations so they don’t lead to disappointment. 


1. Make a plan for gift-giving. 

Adopt a Gift Rule for your kids…and spouse. 

Determine a budget.

Opt for a family gift exchange. 

A gift-giving plan means you, your kids, spouse, and other family members have clear expectations of what they’re getting for Christmas. It helps you with decision-making. And it keeps gift-giving from spiraling out of control. 


2. Another idea for managing expectations and avoiding disappointment is to have a little Celebrating the Holidays family meeting. 

3. Don’t forget the Reason for the Season. 

Have an Advent Wreath 

Give each child a Jesus-themed Advent Calendar 

Choose an Advent Family Devotional or Book 

Keep this meeting to 15 to 30 minutes at the most. 

Invite each family member to talk about what Christmas celebrations and activities matter most to them.

Write down (on a calendar ideally) one activity, event, tradition for each person. 


Just Google to find all the above. 

I know it can be hard to slow down enough to be intentional about Christmas, but I promise it’s worth the effort. Your Christmas will be more calm and bright!

Lord, I lift up this precious mama today. Will you free her up to have a happy Christmas this year? Help her to find the space to do the things that bring her and her.

family joy. Give her clarity and confidence to make decisions and plans that guide her to a calm and beautiful holiday season. Please Lord, meet this mom right where she is in the middle of her busy life. Show this mama you hear the cries of her heart. In Jesus name amen!