Mind Body No Soul artwork

Mind Body No Soul

51 episodes - English - Latest episode: about 2 years ago - ★★★★★ - 1.7K ratings

A series of guided merciless meditations, aggressive affirmations and maniacal mantras led by morally flexible spiritual advisor Jackie Schimmel. Wellness for the unwell.

Comedy Health & Fitness Mental Health
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Episodes

Nam Myoho Renge Kyo

March 14, 2022 21:58 - 13 minutes - 30.6 MB

Jackie checks in after some solitude to delight you with some traditional relaxation chants courtesy of Buddha and encourage you to love yourself.   Produced by Dear Media

Social Anxiety Solutions

January 23, 2022 00:15 - 10 minutes - 23.7 MB

This guided meditation is to help you combat social anxieties through mental reframing, exit strategies and mantra breathwork. Or honestly just ust stay home.   Produced By Dear Media

New Year, Same You.

January 03, 2022 02:08 - 11 minutes - 32.1 MB

Let this guided meditation bring you into the New Year with logic and no promise of a brighter tomorrow. Put down your vision boards and reflect on your consistently poor life decisions to abolish the toxic ideals of a fresh start.    Produced By Dear Media

Road Sage

December 13, 2021 02:57 - 13 minutes - 35.6 MB

Listen to this soothing meditation whilst experiencing uncontrollable road rage after being tailgated by an electric blue Hyandai with blacked out rims like you are in Fast and the Furious Tokyo Drift. Namaste!   Produced By Dear Media

Stretch Betch!

December 06, 2021 04:08 - 14 minutes - 39.6 MB

Allegedly stretching is a thing in the wellness community, here is a guided relation stretching exercise that will probably land you in a chiropractor's office.   Produced By Dear Media

STFU

November 28, 2021 22:20 - 12 minutes - 34.6 MB

This guided meditation is dedicated to Shaman Schimmel after entering a shame spiral about dominating conversations and hijacking social settings to perform self indulgent monologues because she gets bored with people easily.

#Blessed

November 22, 2021 03:55 - 16 minutes - 42.4 MB

Let this guided meditation assist you in your Thanksgiving mental preparation by exploring the ideals of gratitude and luxuriating in the realities of in-gratitude.   Produced By Dear Media

For The Kiddos!

November 19, 2021 09:44 - 12 minutes - 34.1 MB

This guided meditation is intended to instill eternal gratitude into your children to unite and prosper the family unit!   Produced by Dear Media

F*ck Your Family

November 08, 2021 03:08 - 8 minutes - 24.7 MB

This guided meditation is to alleviate stress cause by upcoming family functions and gives you internal peace and solace to create boundaries. Because blood may be thicker than water but it also stains.   Produced By Dear Media

Trick or Retreat.

November 04, 2021 03:35 - 9 minutes - 26.9 MB

Enter the holiday season refreshed and rejuvenated by aligning yourself with nature and forgiving yourself for shoving 18 Kit Kat bars down your throat and giving yourself a yeast infection by dressing up as a sexy kitty.    Produced by Dear Media

Cultivating Girlboss Energy

October 31, 2021 04:23 - 14 minutes - 38.6 MB

Did you just open an Etsy shop and hire 13 interns for "experience" as compensation? Did you fracture your dandruff ridden scalp from shattering glass ceilings on the regular? Then this guided meditation is for you girlboss.

Meditation for Wellness Influencers

October 22, 2021 09:50 - 15 minutes - 41.6 MB

Shaman Schimmel guides wellness influencers on a spiritual journey towards self reflection, transparency and internal illumination via ring light.   Produced By Dear Media

Rock Hard Reset

October 11, 2021 06:29 - 13 minutes - 36.7 MB

Shaman Schimmel returns by taking inventory of all your failures and guiding you on a new journey of intention and resetting your mundane mindset.   Produced By Dear Media

Music Festival Restoration

September 22, 2021 10:57 - 15 minutes - 42.3 MB

Shaman Schimmel helps you restore, recenter and rehabilitate through guided meditation after attending a music festival.   Produced By Dear Media

Male Creative Director Shavasana

September 11, 2021 11:08 - 14 minutes - 39.3 MB

This extremely passive aggressive niche guided meditation is for men who refer to themselves as "creative directors" live in Mar Vista and/or Brooklyn and guffaw at anything mainstream. Get a real job loser. Namaste.   Produced by Dear Media

Downward Log

September 05, 2021 23:24 - 11 minutes - 27.2 MB

Shaman Schimmel utilizes breathwork, affirmations and yoga poses to stimulate the sphincter and achieve digestive nirvana.   Produced by Dear Media

Nourish Bish.

August 29, 2021 12:10 - 12 minutes - 34.8 MB

Nourish and reinvigorate your body and treat it like the temple/ dumpster that encases your spirit. This guided meditation encourages nutrition and incites lifestyle changes.   Produced By Dear Media

Nourish Bish.

August 29, 2021 12:10

Nourish and reinvigorate your body and treat it like the temple/ dumpster that encases your spirit. This guided meditation encourages nutrition and incites lifestyle changes.   Produced By Dear Media

Negative Affirmations

August 22, 2021 23:03 - 10 minutes - 28.9 MB

Let this deeply unsettling lackluster guided meditation encourage self love and acceptance.   Produced by Dear Media

Bridechilla

August 14, 2021 02:01 - 10 minutes - 28.8 MB

This guided meditation is intended for brides and the victims left in their wake, to find inner namaste during their oh so special day.   Produced By Dear Media

Buddhi Call

August 11, 2021 06:49 - 10 minutes - 29.6 MB

This episode is about accepting your sexually transactional role and empowering your vaginal chakra.   Produced by Dear Media

Wake Up Bitch

August 09, 2021 07:49 - 9 minutes - 28.6 MB

This guided meditation is intended to help you rise and shine and tackle the day with mindful perseverance.    Produced By Dear Media

Summertime Sadness

August 06, 2021 07:07 - 9 minutes - 27.8 MB

This week's guided meditation is about embracing internal sadness and allowing yourself to wade in the waters of your own tears.   Produced By Dear Media

Harvesting Creativity

July 27, 2021 08:39 - 13 minutes - 36.6 MB

Jackie leads an exercise to explore our inner creativity and then gets bored and decides to perform a spoken word poem instead.   Produced By Dear Media

Boundaries Bitch.

July 24, 2021 23:08 - 13 minutes - 37.5 MB

This episode is intended to celebrate the beauty of boundaries and to liberate you to enforce them as often as you desire.    Produced by Dear Media

Holistic Hangover Cure

July 20, 2021 00:42 - 10 minutes - 29.5 MB

Put down the bloody mary and Tylenol and let this guided meditation soothe you back into the beacon of health, wellness and hydration.   Produced By Dear Media

Before He Cheats

July 15, 2021 08:03 - 11 minutes - 33 MB

This guided meditation is for anyone suffering from a broken heart looking for spiritual solace and the necessary push to move on.   Produced By Dear Media

Panic Attack

July 13, 2021 08:53 - 11 minutes - 31.5 MB

This weeks guided meditation is intended to help you remain calm and regain control of your serotonin levels whilst having a panic attack. You are fucking fine.   Produced By Dear Media

Panic Attack

July 13, 2021 08:53

This weeks guided meditation is intended to help you remain calm and regain control of your serotonin levels whilst having a panic attack. You are fucking fine.   Produced By Dear Media

Let Freedom Ring

July 10, 2021 11:36 - 12 minutes - 33.7 MB

On this weeks spiritual installment, we explore our right to freedom and the power of independence so you can soar like the baldest of proverbial eagles.   Produced By Dear Media

Kale Me

June 29, 2021 11:19 - 15 minutes - 40.2 MB

Shaman Schimmel uses meditation to encourage healthy eating habits so you don't die alone shoved to the brim with pork rinds and despair.     Produced by Dear Media

Your Kids Are Annoying

June 26, 2021 11:01 - 13 minutes - 35.6 MB

This week's episode is about untethering ourselves to societal niceties and admitting that children are not all gifts to the universe and more often than not, kill the vibe.   Produced By Dear Media

Financial Abundance

June 19, 2021 11:55 - 14 minutes - 37.9 MB

Shaman Schimmel leads you on a spiritual journey to live a life of financial abundance and drip drip divinity. Jeff Besoz and the Dali Llama could never.   Produced By Dear Media

Apology Pathology

June 14, 2021 08:45 - 13 minutes - 37.1 MB

In this week's episode, we explore the psychological damage of excess apologizing and work on reprogramming our cerebral reflex to insincerely pursue forgiveness through mantras and role playing  therapy.   Produced By Dear Media

Present Yet Absent

June 12, 2021 08:05 - 12 minutes - 35 MB

This guided meditation teaches you how to be present whilst absent. Because true wellness and self care incorporates both. Preserve your battery. Glaze like a donut.   Produced By Dear Media

Deflect, Deflect, Deflect.

June 04, 2021 07:01 - 11 minutes - 31.9 MB

Shaman Jackie Schimmel leads an inspiring morning meditation to minimize your self indulgent problems and pivot accordingly so you can have a nice week. Deflection is a vibe.   Produced By Dear Media

Cerebral Stimulation

May 28, 2021 11:27 - 11 minutes - 32 MB

Challenge your cerebrality and brain function with this stimulating exercise in reversing your stupidity. Get ready to take on the week with a shrivel of intelligent prowess. Offensive Level 4.   Produced By Dear Media

Absurd Spoken Word

May 22, 2021 10:21 - 12 minutes - 35.2 MB

Jackie embraces her creative journey by doing a freestyle fully improvised spoken word episode inspired by the elements of nature, universal affirmations and moral corruption. Love and light.   Produced By Dear Media

Never Forgive, Never Forget

May 17, 2021 19:17 - 12 minutes - 29.2 MB

Jackie breaks down the fraudulence of forgiveness and implores you to embrace holding a grudge. We do not dwell, but we do not wish you well.  Produced By Dear Media

Grateful Heart

May 14, 2021 11:00 - 14 minutes - 39.3 MB

This week we start the day with a gratitude meditation that will surely fill your heart with extreme appreciation that will lovingly carry throughout your day. Because at least you're not dead. Offensive Level 3.   Produced By Dear Media

Dead As F*ck

May 07, 2021 10:43 - 10 minutes - 29.2 MB

Shaman Schimmel offers non traditional grief counseling in the form of reframing, encouraging laughter through trauma and YOLO mentality.   Produced By Dear Media

Move Your Ass

May 03, 2021 06:31 - 12 minutes - 33.8 MB

This guided meditation is to encourage physical activity, exercise and healthy lifestyle habits. Offensive Level 4.   Produced By Dear Media

Anger Mismanagement

April 30, 2021 10:50 - 13 minutes - 37.1 MB

In today's lesson we learn how to cope and channel inner rage. Because anger deserves expression not suppression and can be a psychotic conduit for action. Offensive Level 4.   Produced By Dear Media

It's Not Them, It's You.

April 26, 2021 08:02 - 11 minutes - 32.4 MB

This deep reflective meditation explores the theory that you might be the common denominator in all your life's trials and tribulations. Through harsh realization and metabolizing your myopic narcissism, we hope to achieve a vantage point that makes you less of an asshole. Namaste. Produced By Dear Media

Go to Fucking Sleep

April 23, 2021 10:02 - 11 minutes - 32.9 MB

Let this soothing guided meditation lull you to sleep and help you retrain your barely functioning cerebral cortex to experience the rest you may or may not deserve. Offensive Level 3.   Produced by Dear Media

Cut The Cord.

April 19, 2021 06:02 - 10 minutes - 30.4 MB

This guided meditative mantra is about severing toxic relationships and accepting inner hatred. We also explore the possibility that the toxic denominator is you. Offensive Level 3.   Produced By Dear Media    

Give Up On Your Dreams

April 16, 2021 11:36 - 11 minutes - 32.5 MB

Let this motivating manifesto give you permission to lower expectations for yourself by giving up on unrealistic dreams and accepting your dismal destiny.    Produced By Dear Media

Self Esteem Requiem

April 12, 2021 09:34 - 11 minutes - 31.2 MB

Start your week of with a Monday mantra centered in self love. You may not be the most attractive, intellectual or kind but at least you’re alive.    Produced by Dear Media

Desensitized Divinity

April 09, 2021 11:19 - 9 minutes - 22.9 MB

This episode will help emotionally, physically and cerebrally prepare you for the spiritual journey ahead. Because what offends you, descends you.    Produced By Dear Media

MIND. BODY. NO SOUL.

April 09, 2021 11:16 - 9 minutes - 22.5 MB

This series led by Shaman Jackie Schimmel was created to eradicate toxic positivity, broaden your spiritual horizons and encourage self care through laughter and moral flexibility. Welcome to the future of wellness.    Produced By Dear Media