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Marriage By The Book

36 episodes - English - Latest episode: over 1 year ago - ★★★★★ - 3 ratings

Maybe all your marriage needs is a little adjustment. Maybe it needs a complete overhaul. Whatever condition your relationship is in, the Marriage by the Book Podcast brings the answers you need. We draw on over 25 years of marriage ministry experience, as well as our personal experience in restoring and maintaining our own relationship, to bring you practical, Biblical guidance that makes a real difference. If you are looking for a “God answer” to what you are facing, this book is for you. Here’s a small sample of what you’ll learn:• How to resolve conflict non-destructively• Biblical keys to effective communication• How to remove the “walls” in your relationship.• How to restore lost love.• How to grow in intimacy.• And so much more!Rick and Rebekah Porterfield have been in marriage ministry since 1994. They have helped hundreds of couples restore and strengthen their relationships. They are the founders of Marriage By The Book, a ministry based in South Carolina.

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Episodes

The Roles of the Husband and Wife in Marriage Pt 2: The Wife's Role

October 31, 2022 20:00 - 22 minutes - 15.5 MB

Roles in marriage are misunderstood.  The Bible is clear on what the roles are, and when we do things God's way, the family and marriage work best for everyone.  Jesus’s plan for the roles of the husband and wife bring freedom and abundant life into marriage, not bandage and frustration. Find out the truth about the role of the wife in this podcast.     Thanks for listening and please share this podcast with others!    Since 1994, Rick and Rebekah Porterfield have used Biblical relationship ...

The Roles of the Husband and Wife in Marriage Pt 1: Headship

June 07, 2022 14:00 - 22 minutes - 15.3 MB

 The roles of husband and wife are largely misunderstood and often mistaught.  This causes friction and resentment in marriage rather than the abundant life Jesus came to give us (see John 10:10).   In this episode, I start talking about the husband and wife roles, starting with the role of the husband.  What does it really mean to be the head of a relationship?  Find out what the Bible says in this podcast. Thanks for listening and please share this podcast with others! Since 1994, Rick ...

Covenant Part 2: How To Treat Your Spouse

May 24, 2022 13:00 - 19 minutes - 13.2 MB

The Bible tells us how to treat a covenant partner, and your spouse is your covenant partner.  Brace yourself -- you have a covenant relationship with your spouse that you don’t even have with your kids.  That places your spouse in a pretty special position.  In today’s podcast you’ll learn seven concepts that illustrate how you should treat our spouse.  (Important hint - how you treat them isn't based on how they treat you). Thanks for listening and please share this podcast with others! ...

Covenant Part 1: What the Heck is a Covenant Anyway??

April 26, 2022 13:00 - 15 minutes - 10.9 MB

Marriage is a covenant, and that isn't the same as a contract - not even close.   In this episode, find out -  What it means when we say marriage is a covenant How a covenant differs from a contract And hear an awesome story that illustrates the power of covenant Thanks for listening and please share this podcast with others! Since 1994, Rick and Rebekah Porterfield have used Biblical relationship principals to help many couples around the world find success and happiness in marriage.  ...

Intimacy Pt 3: Communication and Sex

April 19, 2022 12:00 - 20 minutes - 13.8 MB

Communication is important to intimacy.  So is sex.  They are the topics of today's podcast.  In this episode, get practical, Biblical advice on -  How to communicate without losing your cool What to do with what you learn during communication The key to making the sexual relationship good for both people! Thanks for listening and please share this podcast with others! Since 1994, Rick and Rebekah Porterfield have used Biblical relationship principals to help many couples around the wor...

Intimacy Pt 2: How to Grow in Intimacy

April 12, 2022 13:00 - 21 minutes - 15.1 MB

Intimacy.  We all want it.  We want to be close to our spouse, and accepted by them.  No matter how intimate you are, you can always grow closer. In this podcast you'll find out -  Why intimacy is so important?   What are practical ways to grow in intimacy? Thanks for listening and please share this podcast with others! Since 1994, Rick and Rebekah Porterfield have used Biblical relationship principals to help many couples around the world find success and happiness in marriage.  We know...

Intimacy Part 1: What is Intimacy?

April 05, 2022 13:00 - 18 minutes - 12.5 MB

What is intimacy?  Is it just sex? That's part of it, but there is a lot more to intimacy than sex.  Intimacy involves knowing your spouse - truly knowing their deepest nature.  We all want intimacy - we want to be truly know, and accepted.  That is possible in marriage! Learn more about intimacy and being one in today's podcast.   Thanks again for listening!  Please subscribe and share this podcast with others.   Since 1994, Rick and Rebekah Porterfield have used Biblical relationship pri...

Removing Walls in Relationships Part 5

March 29, 2022 09:00 - 15 minutes - 11 MB

Let's wrap up how to remove walls!  True forgiveness plus true repentance equals reconciliation.  That;'s how the wall of separation between us and God is removed and our relationship with Him is restored, and it works in marriage too.   In this episode learn -  More of the benefits of repentance How to tell the difference between true and false repentance And an exercise to help you apply this in your marriage and remove the walls. Thanks again for listening! Since 1994, Rick and Rebe...

Removing Walls in Relationships Part \4

March 22, 2022 09:00 - 17 minutes - 12.1 MB

Forgiveness is step one in removing walls, but forgiveness alone does not result in reconciliation.  A second step is required.  This week and next week, we will cover step 2 and you will learn how to remove walls in relationships, including your own, and how to bring reconciliation full circle.  Thanks again for listening.   Since 1994, Rick and Rebekah Porterfield have used Biblical relationship principals to help many couples around the world find success and happiness in marriage.  We ...

Removing Walls in Relationships Part 4

March 22, 2022 09:00 - 17 minutes - 12.1 MB

Forgiveness is step one in removing walls, but forgiveness alone does not result in reconciliation.  A second step is required.  This week and next week, we will cover step 2 and you will learn how to remove walls in relationships, including your own, and how to bring reconciliation full circle.  Thanks again for listening.   Since 1994, Rick and Rebekah Porterfield have used Biblical relationship principals to help many couples around the world find success and happiness in marriage.  We ...

Removing Walls in Relationships Part 3

March 15, 2022 09:00 - 15 minutes - 10.5 MB

Forgiveness is one key to removing emotional walls in relationships.  We continue the topic in this episode where you will find out -  What do you do if they never apologize (i.e., repent!.).  An exercise that will help you to forgive, in a practical way, once and for all Thanks again for listening.   Since 1994, Rick and Rebekah Porterfield have used Biblical relationship principals to help many couples around the world find success and happiness in marriage.  We know firsthand that eve...

Removing Walls in Relationships Part 2

March 08, 2022 10:00 - 17 minutes - 12.4 MB

Emotional walls in marriage are real.  Offense builds them and unforgiveness maintains them.  forgiveness is step one in removing the walls and restoring intimacy and unity. In this epiosde find out -  How much to forgive What to forgive Who to forgive Rebekah and I had walls in our relationship - really they were more like mountains.  Maybe the same thing has happened in your marriage.  Those walls can be removed, once and for all.   In this episode of the Marriage By the Book podcast ...

Removing Walls in Relationships Part 1

March 01, 2022 10:00 - 18 minutes - 13 MB

Rebekah and I had walls in our relationship - really they were more like mountains.  Maybe the same thing has happened in your marriage.  Those walls can be removed, once and for all.   In this episode of the Marriage By the Book podcast start removing the walls in your marriage by learning -  What causes walls between us in marriage  A key to removing the walls (hint, it's forgiveness!).  The consequences of not forgiving. Thanks for listening! Since 1994, Rick and Rebekah Porterfield...

The Answer Part 2: The "Secret" to Making Marriage Work

February 22, 2022 10:00 - 21 minutes - 14.5 MB

God's love is the answer to every relationship problem.  It is truly the overlooked key to making marriage (and everything else) work; as it says in 1 Cor 13:8, His love never fails.  In this podcast episode, find out  -  7 big benefits of applying God's love in your marriage How to apply God's love in marriage How to restore lost feelings of love Thanks for listening! Since 1994, Rick and Rebekah Porterfield have used Biblical relationship principals to help many couples around the wor...

Who Else wants to Know the ONE Answer to a Better Marriage?

February 15, 2022 15:00 - 20 minutes - 14.1 MB

I love how God makes things simple.  Just as there is one problem in relationships, so there is one answer.  And as with all of God's answers, this one is super powerful. It will change your marriage and bring success to so many areas of life.   Listen to this episode to find out the answer and begin applying it to your life today.   Since 1994, Rick and Rebekah Porterfield have used Biblical relationship principals to help many couples around the world find success and happiness in marria...

THE Answer Pt 1: Who Else wants to Know the ONE Answer to a Better Marriage?

February 15, 2022 15:00 - 20 minutes - 14.1 MB

I love how God makes things simple.  Just as there is one problem in relationships, so there is one answer.  And as with all of God's answers, this one is super powerful. It will change your marriage and bring success to so many areas of life.   Listen to this episode to find out the answer and begin applying it to your life today.   Since 1994, Rick and Rebekah Porterfield have used Biblical relationship principals to help many couples around the world find success and happiness in marria...

Imagine a Better Marriage! (The ONE Problem in Relationships Pt 4)

February 08, 2022 10:00 - 13 minutes - 8.97 MB

Self-centeredness is THE problem in relationships (ouch!).  The Bible is clear on that point, but it is also clear that you can crush the problem.  In this episode, learn how, Thanks for listening! Since 1994, Rick and Rebekah Porterfield have used Biblical relationship principals to help many couples around the world find success and happiness in marriage.  We know firsthand that even the best marriages can get better, and the worst marriages can be saved.    For free resources and infor...

The ONE Problem in Relationships (Pt 3)

February 01, 2022 10:00 - 17 minutes - 12 MB

I was floored when I found out there was just ONE problem in relationships, including in my marriage.  And that problem is self-centeredness.  All the things we fight about are just symptoms of THE problem.  The more I learned about it, the more I learned to overcome it and have a better relationship.  You will do the same! In this episode, find out -  The characteristics of self-centeredness Its deceptiveness The burden it causes Our secret weapon against "The Problem" Thanks for liste...

The One Problem in Relationships (Pt 2)

January 25, 2022 10:00 - 16 minutes - 11.7 MB

There is just one problem in relationships!  We introduced it last week, and continue talking about it this week.  In this episode, you'll learn the effects of The Problem! It destroys relationships It hinders success in life It leads to manipulation It creates symptoms (all of the other "problems" in marriage!) Thanks for listening! Since 1994, Rick and Rebekah Porterfield have used Biblical relationship principals to help many couples around the world find success and happiness in ma...

The One Problem in Relationships (Pt 1)

January 18, 2022 10:00 - 17 minutes - 12.2 MB

There is just one problem in relationships!  That may seem hard to believe.  But it's true.  All of the things that cause tension, disagreements, or even arguments in marriage are just symptoms of the one true problem.  In this episode find out from the Bible what THE problem is and the effects it has on relationships.  Since 1994, Rick and Rebekah Porterfield have used Biblical relationship principals to help many couples around the world find success and happiness in marriage.  We know fi...

Greatness in Marriage

January 11, 2022 10:00 - 21 minutes - 15 MB

Do you believe you’ll achieve greatness in your marriage? If not you, then who?  I believe greatness in marriage is possible and it should be on our radar.  It should be a goal.  It really is possible because all things are possible with God (Matt 19:26).    Greatness in marriage isn’t going to happen accidentally.  There is a gap between where we are now, and where we can be in marriage.  We have the ability to close that gap between where we are and where we are capable of being.      O...

3 Keys to Freedom From Strife

January 04, 2022 10:00 - 21 minutes - 15 MB

Strife is destructive.  We all know that.  But it doesn't have to be that way.  In this episode, Rick teaches on how to eliminate strife in your marriage so that you can enjoy the favor of God and the blessing that He has placed on marriage.    The peace of a strife free life is well worth the effort it takes.    Listen and you will find out,  What strife is What causes strife How to avoid strife Since 1994, Rick and Rebekah Porterfield have used Biblical relationship principals to help...

Holiday Survival Guide Part 8: Wrapping up The Best Gift

December 28, 2021 10:00 - 19 minutes - 13.1 MB

What never fails?  According to 1 Corinthians 13:8, God's love never fails.  That's good news, because you can love your spouse with God's love and make a real difference in your marriage.  In this episode we cover: You really can apply God's love in your marriage Some key characteristics of God's love There is already someone you love this way  How to restore lost feelings And more Since 1994, Rick and Rebekah Porterfield have used Biblical relationship principals to help many couples...

Holiday Survival Guide Part 7: The Best Gift

December 21, 2021 10:00 - 17 minutes - 12.3 MB

What is the best gift?  God's love is the best gift!  God's love caused him to send Jesus to make forgiveness and salvation available to all of us.  How awesome is that? In this episode of the Marriage By The Book podcast, we begin applying God's kind of love to marriage.  You will find out - What God's love is How His love acts How to apply His love in your marriage relationship The difference doing so will make Since 1994, Rick and Rebekah Porterfield have used Biblical relationship ...

Holiday Survival Guide Part 6: That's Not Normal!

December 14, 2021 10:00 - 18 minutes - 12.7 MB

Traditions play a big role in the holidays.  What's normal to you, may not be normal top your spouse. The traditions your spouse grew up with are almost certainly different in some ways than the traditions you grew up with.  When what's normal to you, differs from what's normal to them, it can keep you from seeing eye to eye on how you celebrate, how you decorate, how gifts are handled, and even what you eat.   In this weeks edition of the Holiday Survival Guide we talk about "normals" and ...

Holiday Survival Guide Part 5: Reconciling Relationships

December 07, 2021 10:00 - 21 minutes - 14.5 MB

At some point in their life, 40% of adults have been estranged from close family (that's over 100 million in the USA alone).  In over a third of those cases, reconciliation is never achieved.   It doesn't have to be that way! During the Christmas season, people's hearts are more turned toward family, which makes it a great time to do something about it.  God's Word gives insight into how to bring about reconciliation.  In this episode, find out what you can do to take steps toward eliminatin...

Holiday Survival Guide Part 4: Holly Jolly Conflict

November 30, 2021 10:00 - 32 minutes - 22.2 MB

Here's an amazing statistic - research shows that 88 percent of people experience greater stress during the holidays, and that can cause more family conflicts.  Wow!  It doesn't have to be that way, and it doesn't have to ruin your holidays.  In this week's podcast we talk about how to deal with Holiday conflict.   Listen and find out -   The top 5 things that spark squabbles during the holidays.  7 things you can do to help deal with Holly Jolly Conflict Since 1994, Rick and Rebekah Por...

Holiday Survival Guide Part 3: Being Thankful Changes Everything

November 23, 2021 10:00 - 23 minutes - 15.8 MB

What if you could only take with you into tomorrow what you are thankful for today?  Would that change how you look at things and value them?  Probably so.   Being thankful is powerful.  It can completely change things by changing how you view your circumstances and world.   You will probably never see a thankful person who is unhappy, but you will likely see lots of ungrateful people who never seem to be happy.  There is a connection between being thankful and being happy.   In today's po...

Holiday Survival Guide Part 2- Gifts!

November 16, 2021 10:00 - 24 minutes - 17.1 MB

Gifts are a big deal at the holidays.  Expectations are high, and disappointment can be too.  In today's episode Rick and Rebekah talk about giving and receiving gifts.   Find out Why we give gifts Things to consider when buying a gift How to deal with potential disappointment Teaching children to give And more. We also answer a listener question: "What if your spouse gets you a bad gift?" Since 1994, Rick and Rebekah Porterfield of Marriage By The Book have used Biblical relationshi...

Holiday Survival Guide Part 1: Dealing With In-laws!

November 09, 2021 10:00 - 23 minutes - 16.3 MB

The Holidays can be stressful on your marriage and family, and dealing with time demands from family, including in-laws - can make it worse.  In this episode, Rick and Rebekah kick off their Marriage By The Book Holiday Survival Guide by discussing how to deal with in-laws (and others) during the holiday season. In this episode, you will learn -  The importance of planning ahead instead of just letting the Holidays happen. How to prefer your spouse and honor your parents. Two practical "r...

Opposites attract, right? (Dealing with differences in marriage!)

November 02, 2021 13:00 - 20 minutes - 14.3 MB

Have you ever thought about when you first met your spouse? It can seem like you have so much in common that you are alike in every way. And even where you are different – you tend to like everything about that other person. We even change ourselves to be like them and to do what they like.   People can be very different – and get along phenomenally well. Introvert vs. extrovert Planner vs. spontaneous Beach vs. mountains  Early in the relationship, most people love to do everything tog...

Eliminating Insecurity in Marriage

October 26, 2021 09:00 - 21 minutes - 14.6 MB

Insecurity - we all deal with it. Marriage should be a safe haven - a place that is free of insecurity - and it can be! In this episode you'll learn the following and be equipped to eliminate insecurity in your marriage.  1. What insecurity is. (To get rid of it, you need to know what you are dealing with.)  2. The Biblical solution that drives out insecurity. 3. A practical application that you can put to work in your relationship now.  Also in this episode, we answer a listener question ...

Get a Grip on Yourself!

October 19, 2021 09:00 - 20 minutes - 13.9 MB

On today's podcast, we will talk about the benefits of getting a grip on yourself (aka self-control) in marriage, and answer a listener question about the sexual relationship.   Self control is important.  Many people can get angrier with their spouse than anyone.  As a result, they might say or do things they don't mean.  Controlling that is the topic of this podcast.  In this episode -  Reasons/excuses for losing control. What a lack of self control can do to a marriage Can we control ...

3 Keys to Effective Communication in Marriage

October 12, 2021 09:00 - 20 minutes - 14 MB

Communication is a big deal in marriage!  Some people even say it is the biggest problem in marriage.  As with any topic, the Bible tells you how to successfully communicate with your spouse.    3 keys to effective communication in marriage that will work no matter what your communication style might be.   How to avoid stirring up anger while communicating.  The power of acting on what you learn. Also in this episode, we will answer a listener question about what to do when you have been...

HELP!

October 05, 2021 09:00 - 21 minutes - 14.8 MB

Are problems normal in marriage?  if you have problems, does that mean you married the wrong person, or maybe that something is fundamentally wrong with you?   The answers are - Yes, problems are normal in marriage, and, No, having problems doesn't mean you married the wrong person or that something is wrong with you.    In this episode we -   Expose a lie that your enemy (the devil) tells every married couple, that's designed to steal their hope! Provide a Biblical perspective on marriag...

5 Reasons Your Marriage Can Be Better

September 27, 2021 18:00 - 21 minutes - 14.9 MB

There is hope!  Whether your marriage is good, or in need of improvement, it can be better than it is right now.  In fact, your relationship can continue to grow in success and happiness throughout your married life.  Many people think that having a good marriage is a matter of chance; they think that some people are just, "lucky in love".  Not so!  It isn't all just up to luck or happenstance,  In this first episode of the Marriage By The Book podcast, find out five Biblical reasons why the...