Marriage and Martinis
391 episodes - English - Latest episode: about 1 month ago - ★★★★★ - 1.4K ratingsMarriage and Martinis is an attempt to present a real, authentic marriage at its core: the love, hate, teamwork, struggles, laughter, humiliation, and ever-changing dynamics that comprise spousal relationships. Join Danielle and Adam as they explore every hilarious, heartfelt, shocking, embarrassing, and completely inappropriate facet of marriage and parenting. It’s a bumpy ride, but it’s worth it.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Episodes
A Short Stroll Down Gaslit Lane
March 18, 2024 09:00 - 1 hour - 88.6 MBRecently, Danielle heard something on Tik Tok that really struck her: "are we all just spending the second half of our lives recovering from the first half?" This got her thinking about all the things we're taught for so long while growing up, only to figure out that all of those messages and concepts are all just a bunch of BS. Are we all too "gaslit" to even know what we, as individuals, even want in life? How can we separate our own goals and desires with those we've been TOLD we should w...
Reflections On A "Real" Open Marriage, With Molly Roden Winter
March 04, 2024 10:00 - 1 hour - 87.7 MBMolly had reached her breaking point as an overwhelmed mom and wife when she and her husband decided to open up their marriage back in 2008. In this honest conversation, Danielle asks Molly questions that are on so many people's minds when we think about allowing our partners to be intimate with other humans. Some of these include, how do you handle the intense moments of jealousy that follow knowing your partner has been sexual with someone else? What happened when your kids found out, and ...
"Do You Secretly Wish I Was A 'Tradwife,'" and Other Thought-Provoking Questions
February 26, 2024 10:00 - 1 hour - 98.2 MBIn this not-so-conventional "check-in" episode, Adam and Danielle answer some deep questions about recent lessons on life they've learned, what's something they've each done recently about which they're proud, and a lighting round of quick answers concerning how they're feeling about certain aspects of life. Plus, Danielle introduces Adam to the term, "tradwife," and wants to know if he secretly wishes she was more like one of those wives. Get a pen and paper out, because partners are going ...
Marriage Is Not A Requirement, With Author Lyz Lenz
February 19, 2024 10:00 - 1 hour - 84.6 MBLyz Lenz grew up religious, in a household that taught their children that marriage is the only option, and divorce is totally off-limits, with the possible exceptions of infidelity and/or abuse. But 11 years into her own marriage, she knew she couldn't stay, even though the reasons for wanting to leave were different than what she had been taught were valid and acceptable. In her new book "This American Ex-Wife, How I Left My Husband And Started My Life," Lyz intertwines her story with a br...
The Valentine's Day Duel of Desire
February 05, 2024 10:00 - 54 minutes - 75.3 MBIn this fun, pre-Valentine's Day episode, Danielle and Adam go head to head in a battle of "Sex trivia." Each of them came up with ten questions revolving around sex and intimacy to try to stump the other. If you've been wanting to know more weird facts about sex, or even basic information we should have learned a long time ago, you'll love this lighthearted challenge to determine whether Adam or Danielle is the master of sex (ed). Valentine's Day is coming! Time to order the Date Night Que...
To Apologize or Not Apologize, That is the Question
January 29, 2024 10:00 - 1 hour - 98.4 MBAdam and Danielle continue their conversation about communication by finally going deep into "apologies." They discuss whether or not they heard HEALTHY apologies growing up, whether they remember apologizing to friends, and how apologies (or lack thereof) have affected their relationship over the years. Other things they discuss include: Can a person say "sorry' too often? Should women stop apologizing so much? Do women really apologize more than men? What's the difference between sayin...
Houston, We Have A Problem
January 15, 2024 10:00 - 1 hour - 106 MBDanielle and Adam discuss why communication is just so damn hard. Each reflects on what communication was like in their households growing up, how gender roles affects communication styles, and what type of communicator each is currently. Plus, where have they made progress concerning communication, and where do they still need to improve? Join Danielle on January 25th, 26th, and 27th in the evenings, EST. for an empowering virtual workshop for women. Beyond Permission will be led by Daniel...
Navigating “The Sex Talk Demons,” With Leah Carey
December 18, 2023 10:00 - 1 hour - 98.2 MB** This episode mentions and has some discussion of sexual trauma. Please take care while listening. Recently, Danielle asked her good friend, sex and intimacy coach, Leah Carey, to listen to her and Adam's wildly popular episode, “Awakening The Sex Talk Demons.” Danielle wanted to know why this conversation with Adam concerning intimacy had been so explosive and chaotic before it was able to be productive. Had they done it wrong? Is it actually possible to tell your partner you need more,...
Seven Days of Soul-Searching
December 11, 2023 10:00 - 1 hour - 91 MBIn this follow-up episode to last week's "When Is It The Last Straw," Adam breaks down some of what he has reflected on, realized, and is starting to learn, even in the past week. However, he also admits that removing his ego from the equation is difficult for him. Danielle and Adam discuss their history with therapy, why it hasn't been effective for Adam in the past, and why he presently is beginning to change his view on it. Adam confronts Danielle about the confusing mixed messages she ga...
....When Is It 'The Last Straw?'
December 04, 2023 10:00 - 1 hour - 127 MBIn this difficult, impactful episode, Danielle and Adam get real and raw about some pretty complicated issues they've been dealing with recently. Danielle attempts to "walk the walk" concerning her changing expectations and "demands" about which she talked in the Letting My Freak Flag Fly episode. What set it all off? What influences have led to her fresh understanding of what a partnership should look like? How can Danielle and Adam move forward and not fall back into old patterns? This epi...
Letting My Freak Flag Fly - A Solo Birthday Episode
November 13, 2023 10:00 - 45 minutes - 62.9 MBIn the first solo episode since "Is She....Letting Herself Go," Danielle discusses the ways she has always had to "tone herself down" to fit into the confines of societal norms and expectations. However, now that she is older and has stopped restricting herself so much, she is working towards creating a life where she can feel as close to 100% of her true self as often as possible. This means podcasting more, containing to work towards body acceptance and allowing herself to continue to savo...
MINI EPISODE: Join Our First Couples' Challenge!
October 30, 2023 01:09 - 24 minutes - 33.1 MBDanielle and Adam have been participating in their own challenge for over three weeks now, and the results have been awesome. When Danielle first created The Challenge, she hoped that it would lead to improved communication, intimacy, laughter, and connection....and it has far surpassed her expectations. Now, Danielle and Adam are offering other couples to have the same chance to participate in their own version of The Challenge. This month-long experience gives couples everything they need ...
The Love Languages, Part Two
October 23, 2023 09:00 - 1 hour - 102 MBIn their follow-up episode about The Love Languages, Danielle and Adam go much deeper into everything from the overall concept, certain problematic aspects of the overall phenomena, and what they would both need from EACH of the five love languages. Plus, they talk more about Adam's findings concerning the symbolism behind the upside-down pineapple and the red Adirondack chairs. What are Danielle's thoughts about Words of Affirmation, and what would she prefer to have that feels more organic...
The Five Love Languages, Veruca Salt Style
October 16, 2023 09:00 - 1 hour - 88 MBPeople always ask Danielle and Adam to do an episode on The Five Love Languages. So, they're finally doing it. But, they're doing it their own way. Danielle talks about why she refuses to choose one love language. Adam talks about his concern that the love languages quiz would be viewed more of a "test" and how that affected his answers. The two discuss how their love language styles would have most definitely changed over the course of their relationship, and how certain important aspects o...
Inclusion Is A Verb, With Hanif Fazal
October 02, 2023 09:00 - 1 hour - 87.6 MBDanielle and Hanif discuss the life events that impacted Hanif so greatly that he co-founded the Center For Equity and Inclusion. Born to a father of Indian descent from Tanzania, and a Mexican-American mother, Hanif breaks down how being a person of color has affected his identity in every space he's occupied in life. Also, how his parents' desire to have their children assimilate into American culture caused a lot of confusion concerning how he should feel about his mixed background. For t...
The Challenge
September 25, 2023 09:00 - 1 hour - 101 MBDanielle and Adam have the opportunity to choose one challenge for each other to complete in the next thirty days. They discuss how they came up with these challenges, how they think one another should go about doing the work to complete them, and what the ultimate goal is for each. Want to spend a weekend with Danielle, Leah, and other badass women, embarking on a virtual, groundbreaking journey from January 25th to 27th? We'll be exploring our true sensual and sexual selves at midlife, sh...
Waiting For The Other Shoe To Drop
September 18, 2023 09:00 - 1 hour - 93.8 MBWhy is it so hard for us to get into a mindset that allows us to just feel contentment and happiness in the life we've created? In this episode, Danielle discusses the "guilt" she feels for not being able to fully embrace all of the new, positive aspects of life this move has brought their family. If happiness is the goal in life, why is it so difficult for us to feel that ultimate emotion over long periods of time? Adam and Danielle break down the thoughts of Brene Brown, the ways we've been...
Let's See How Far We've Come
September 04, 2023 09:00 - 1 hour - 96.3 MBAfter a whirlwind phase of chaotic life events, Danielle wants to take a moment and discuss how far she and Adam have come as individuals, as a couple, and especially as parents. But, the two realize that just stopping and living in the moment is difficult when there are still so many uncertainties. Still, the couple attempt to discuss the fact that it's necessary to stop and reflect on how much they've accomplished together over the past year and a half (and longer). Some things the two dis...
"It Doesn't Have To Be Perfect To Be Wonderful," With Life Coach Amy Alpert
August 28, 2023 09:00 - 1 hour - 91.4 MBThree days ago, Danielle and Adam dropped their daughter, Mia, off for her freshman year at college. But getting to this point was nothing short of a rollercoaster of a journey. In this episode, Danielle and her sister, Life Coach Amy, discuss what they've both learned about preparing our kids (and ourselves) for the post-high school phase. Amy has sent her two kids off to college, and helps other moms deal with this transitional time of life filled with so much change and uncertainty. Some ...
Sleeping With The Enemy
August 21, 2023 09:00 - 1 hour - 115 MBFor the majority of their relationship, Danielle and Adam have slept in separate bedrooms. So, what happens when, after all this time, they attempt to sleep together all through the night in the same bed? Why does Danielle feel like this is an important change to make in the relationship at this particular stage of life? How did they start sleeping in separate bedrooms in the first place? Adam and Danielle break down the history of their "sleep divorce" and all the reasons it may have worked...
MnM Vintage - Good Intentions, Bad Execution
August 14, 2023 09:00 - 1 hour - 101 MBIn an episode that Adam describes as, "one of his favorite we've ever recorded," the two discuss more concerning etiquette and how these unwritten "rules" have affected their lives. Adam goes deep into the frustration of owning a retail business and why "the customer isn't always right." Danielle talks about the workers who she thinks should be tipped ALL THE MONEY for what they are expected to do. They also talk about the hardships of teaching kids how to behave out in the world when over t...
One New House, Two Tired AF People.
August 07, 2023 09:00 - 55 minutes - 76.2 MBThis episode of the podcast is brought to you by two people who desperately need sleep, don't have enough energy to make much sense, but really wanted to check in with everyone with a quick update. Danielle and Adam discuss finally being in their new home, why this was the most draining of all the moves, and how they're embracing their new small-town lifestyle. Danielle talks more about her guilt concerning moving the cats to a new home, and Adam is excited to talk all about his new lawnmowe...
Awakening the Sex Talk Demons
July 24, 2023 09:00 - 1 hour - 107 MBIt took two tries for Danielle and Adam to record this episode, because the first attempt ended in one of the worst arguments they've had in months. However, the second time, the conversation was one of the best and most honest talks about sex and intimacy on the podcast. However, this was after four hours of heated debate and fighting after Danielle opened up a "can of worms" that neither of them was expecting would result in such anger and frustrating on both their parts. In what Danielle ...
The Beauty of Doing Less, With The Lazy Genius
July 17, 2023 09:00 - 57 minutes - 79.6 MBIn a society that glamorizes the idea of "doing it all," it's easy to get sucked in to the idea that if we aren't doing it all, we're somehow failing. But according to Kendra, AKA "The Lazy Genius," we absolutely do not need to and should not even attempt to do it all. In this episode, self proclaimed "hot mess mom" Danielle asks Kendra about everything from the secret to making a good "to do list," to how we can possibly stop feeling like laundry is taking over our lives, to how we know wha...
Sh*t's Getting Real (Moving Episode Part 2).
July 10, 2023 09:00 - 1 hour - 97.7 MBIn this highly requested follow-up to last week's episode about moving into their seventh house, Danielle and Adam talk more deeply about how the stress is starting to manifest in ways that aren't so positive, and how the impending move is making them appreciate certain aspects of their current lives that they may have taken for granted. Also, what types of rituals, products, and habits are saving them right now, and making the whole process a little easier? Danielle talks new bras, clothing...
THE SEVENTH HOUSE (yes, seventh)
July 03, 2023 09:00 - 1 hour - 98.9 MBIn this extremely vulnerable episode, Adam and Danielle divulge all the details concerning their move: why, where, and when. Plus, they go on some pretty crazy tangents about some TMI concerning Danielle's recent sexual craze, and Adam's ridiculous stress level. The two discuss how their relationship has changed since the last move, and how Adam's obsession with moving has completely transformed. Plus, what are they hoping to get from their new house and the town to which they're moving that...
Love Makes A Family, With Linda Fruits and Maddy Gross
June 05, 2023 09:00 - 55 minutes - 75.6 MBIt's pride month, but it's always a good time to celebrate all the love. This episode has no shortage of real, honest, deep, intense love, and what beautiful things can happen when someone stops letting society dictate how their life should look, and starts looking inward to make big decisions. Danielle was so excited to catch up with her friend, Linda, to get caught up on the impactful and enormous changes that have occurred since she came out over two years ago. Danielle was even more thri...
Platonic Soulmates Are Real, With Good Moms Bad Choices
May 22, 2023 09:00 - 57 minutes - 79.3 MBDanielle and Adam are finally reunited with Erica and Jamilah from the podcast, Good Moms Bad Choices, and in this episode they are going DEEP into what society gets wrong about relationships, and why they're shifting the narrative about what a "life-partner" can look like. These best friends discuss everything from how Erica had the courage to ask Milah to "be her friend," when they were both young single moms, and the incredible bond that has developed and evolved since then. In this epis...
The Relationship Check-In
May 15, 2023 09:00 - 1 hour - 97.3 MBSo many couples go years without ever truly "checking in" with one another to discuss how things are going between them and which aspects of their relationship they need to focus on and improve, as well as which aspects of their relationship are going well. Danielle and Adam sit down to do a "relationship check-in" in real time. After looking for a "check-in" that suits their needs but not finding anything she really liked, Danielle creates one that she feels is more comprehensive and balanc...
We're More Than Just A Body, with The Bird's Papaya
May 01, 2023 09:00 - 1 hour - 89.4 MBDanielle has been extremely honest about her struggle with body image and self-acceptance. She was so excited to sit down and ask one of her biggest role models, Sarah Landry (aka The Bird's Papaya) all about her experience and journey towards unapologetic body confidence. The two discuss why a attaining a "goal body" isn't all it's cracked up to be, how they're trying to show up in the world even when they feel uncomfortable, and what they really think makes a person incredibly sexy. Sarah ...
Cursing, A Love Story
April 24, 2023 09:00 - 55 minutes - 75.7 MBFor the past four and a half years, there's one question that Danielle and Adam get pretty regularly: "why do you have to curse so much?" It's a fair question, and one that actually doesn't bother them, as long as it's asked in a f*cking respectful way. So, why do they curse so much? In what ways do they feel that the art of cursing is misunderstood? What are their rules as parents concerning their kids using profanity? What are their favorite lines from movies that involve cursing? Which of...
MnM Vintage - Is She Letting Herself Go?
April 17, 2023 09:00 - 55 minutes - 76.8 MBWarning: This episode discusses body image, disordered eating, and other complex relationships with food and exercise. Please take care while listening. This is Danielle's first solo episode in over three years. However, the response she's gotten to some more recent episodes in which she gets very vulnerable about body image and the all-consuming aspects of trying to attain a certain physique, made it clear to her that she needed to dig deeper into the topic by herself before tackling the t...
Why We All Need An Estate Plan, With Gideon T.J. Alpert esq.
April 10, 2023 09:00 - 1 hour - 91.3 MBThe term "Estate Planning" is quite misleading. So many of us believe that "getting our affairs in order" is something reserved only for the wealthy. Yet it is absolutely necessary to our loved ones' futures that we sort out financial and personal details ASAP, no matter the status of our finances and assets, especially if we have children under the age of 18. But how do we approach such a monumentally confusing and overwhelming task? Danielle and Adam sat down with Estate Planning expert (w...
The Episode of Random Questions
March 27, 2023 09:00 - 1 hour - 101 MBWhat was supposed to be a light, fun episode of Danielle and Adam asking one another random questions about life turns into a deeper, more real discussion about frustrations and issues beneath the actual subject matter. How does Danielle feel about Adam's crypto obsession? Why does Adam feel like he doesn't need to take more of an interest in women's content? This is a fun episode that also tackles some unexpected marital issues that will most likely be relatable to tons of couples. Want to...
Finding The Right Fit College, With Peter Tilles
March 20, 2023 09:00 - 1 hour - 110 MBAfter recently completing the college admissions process with their oldest child, Adam and Danielle knew they wanted to do a series of episodes for parents who might be anticipating or already immersed in the process. They asked their friend and seasoned admissions consultant, Peter Tilles, to sit down and answer their (and your) questions concerning all things college related. They also knew, however, that they wanted this series to be different than other podcasts that center on higher edu...
A Taboo Discussion About Vices, Part One
March 06, 2023 18:51 - 1 hour - 86.9 MBTW: All things "vice" related. Adam and Danielle make it no secret that they have some questionable life choices. Most people won't talk about the taboo aspects of coping mechanisms due to the shame and stigma. But guess what? Life is hard, and we're not all equipped with the healthiest and most acceptable tactics. This is a safe space for anyone who has at times felt shamed for resorting to vices that aren't "healthy" or socially encouraged. In part one of this series, Danielle and Adam d...
Sliding Doors
February 20, 2023 12:39 - 50 minutes - 69.2 MBAdam and Danielle discuss the concert of Sliding Doors and all the ways their lives would be different if they had made alternate momentary decisions. Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
The Porn Conversation with Erika Lust
February 14, 2023 11:56 - 50 minutes - 68.7 MBIs there any more uncomfortable subject to discuss in a real, educational way than porn? Probably not. Which is exactly why Danielle wanted so desperately to do this episode.Erika Lust is an award-winning, feminist, sex-positive director of adult cinema. Now, she’s made it her mission to educate parents about how we can have these incredibly hard discussions with our kids. Porn is ubiquitous these days. So why are so few people talking about it? Erika breaks down why we can’t wait any longer...
The Rules Are, There Are No Rules
February 06, 2023 10:00 - 1 hour - 89.3 MBDanielle and Adam reflect on their household rules growing up (or lack thereof) and how these (non) rules impacted them in becoming the people they are today. They discuss how their "rules" around religion have changed, which societal rules we need to get rid of, and what the rules of their household are now that they're supposedly in charge. What's the only movie Danielle's mom ever made them walk out of and why? What were the rules living in the dorm at Adam's boarding school? What would t...
Keeping It Real, With Erinn and Oliver Hudson
January 30, 2023 23:18 - 56 minutes - 77.3 MBVery few couples are as honest and refreshing as Erinn and Oliver. In this episode, the two couples commiserate about everything from trust in marriage, to how hard consistency is in parenting, and why perfection is such a scam. Oliver gets real about what it was like coming clean to Erinn early in their marriage about his infidelity, how it almost broke him, and how they've been able to talk about it so openly now that they have such a strong, solid partnership. Erinn talks about what it wa...
Is It Too Late To Say 'Happy New Year?'
January 23, 2023 10:00 - 1 hour - 95.3 MBOk, so Adam and Danielle are a little late with their New Year's episode, but hey, what else is new? 2022 was the year that felt like ten years. Adam and Danielle go deep about what stunk, what was great, what they learned, and what they are really hoping for in 2023. OUR BESTSELLING DATE NIGHT BOXES ARE BACK BY POPULAR DEMAND FOR VALENTINE'S DAY!! These went fast for the holidays so do not wait to claim yours! Limited Supply!! Get 15% off the Date Night Questions book with the promo cod...
A Conversation With The ADHD Dude
January 09, 2023 10:00 - 48 minutes - 66.6 MBFor the past few years, Danielle and Adam have done a lot of researching when it comes to ADHD. But they've really wanted to sit down and ask an expert all of their questions and the questions from listeners. In this episode, Danielle and Ryan (aka The ADHD Dude) talk about everything ADHD related when it comes to kids (especially boys). The two talk about how to get your child's teachers to better understand and how to seek their help. They discuss medication, handling tough situations like...
"Were You Raised By Wolves?" with Nick Leighton and Leah Bonnema
November 21, 2022 10:00 - 1 hour - 84.6 MBIn this light, fun episode just in time for the holiday season, Danielle and Adam ask the hosts of this popular "etiquette-ish" podcast about everything from tipping, to regifting, to what to do when you seriously just don't want to go to that party. Danielle reveals what weird thing happened when she neglected to send a thank you note to an older member of her extended family after having her first child, and Adam asks if it's ok for customers to just leave their crap all over the aisles. A...
Yes, ADHD is VERY real
November 14, 2022 10:00 - 1 hour - 100 MBTW: Mention of suicidal thoughts. In one of their most vulnerable episodes, Danielle and Adam sit down to discuss the impact that ADHD has had on their family. While currently fully in the thick of this journey, opening up about this struggle was not easy, but it is something they know could help so many others. Having a daughter and a son who struggle, Danielle and Adam reveal the deep heartbreak that has fully consumed them as parents for the past year. However, they also feel so lucky an...
What We Can All Learn From Open Relationships, With Leah Carey
October 31, 2022 09:00 - 1 hour - 85.7 MBDanielle sits down with her good friend Leah Carey, who is a sex and intimacy coach and host of the podcast, "Good Girls Talk About Sex." The two discuss Leah's new ventures into pursuing an open relationship with her longtime partner. How did they know it was the right time to explore this lifestyle? What is different about their relationship now that allows them to trust one another enough to pursue sexual experiences outside of their relationship? What are the boundaries for these sexual ...
MnM Vintage - Unconditional Acceptance, with special guest Mia Silverstein
October 24, 2022 09:00 - 56 minutes - 77.5 MBThis episode is by far one of the most personal and vulnerable of the Marriage and Martinis podcast yet. In this special episode, Adam and Danielle's oldest child, 15-year-old Mia Silverstein comes on to discuss her experience grappling with sexual identity, and what she wants kids and parents everywhere to know about self, family, and social acceptance as someone in the LGBTQ community. What was "coming out" like for her? How has social media both helped and hindered her experience with sel...
The Technology Episode: Past, Present, & Future
October 17, 2022 09:00 - 1 hour - 126 MBHow did we use technology in the past, and are we regulating it for our kids? Probably not. Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Turns Offs: Budgeting
October 10, 2022 09:00 - 1 hour - 105 MBAdam and Danielle discuss their history and current budgeting situation. It pretty much goes as you'd expect. Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Buy Your Own Damn Almond Milk
October 03, 2022 09:00 - 54 minutes - 74.2 MBDanielle and Adam have been very honest about the ups and downs of finances in their marriage. But from where does it all originate? The two go deep into their childhoods, uncovering imbalances between perception and reality concerning the money situation while they were each growing up. How has it impacted them as individuals and as a couple? When did it all go wrong? How has society set them up to fail? Any couple who has ever encountered hardships about money will not want to miss this ep...
The Sex Ed Our Kids Actually Need and Deserve, With Dr. Jennifer Lincoln
September 19, 2022 09:00 - 49 minutes - 67.5 MBDr. Jennifer Lincoln has become a tik Tok phenomenon. With 2.8 million followers, she's demystifying sex and taking the shame out of the conversations surrounding sex ed that our youth really need to be having and hearing. Tackling everything from periods, to puberty, to body parts, she's working hard to stop the stigmas and spread the real message that this is all natural and normal. Danielle asks all her questions as a mom of tweens and teens, and both sons and a daughter. How do we make o...