Embrace the No: How Seeking Rejection Can Amplify Your Brand

Your Dream Business

English - January 01, 2024 00:00 - 53 minutes - 30.4 MB - ★★★★★ - 34 ratings
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Previous Episode: Merry Christmas

Next Episode: Purposeful Steps: Aligning Your Thoughts and Actions for Success

Today’s episode of the podcast is an interview with Liz Mosley, where we are talking all about the challenge she set herself to receive 100 rejections in her business, what she learned and why embracing rejection is important for your brand!

Liz Mosley is a graphic designer with over 15 years experience and now specialises in creating creative branding and animated GIFS for small business owners. She also hosts a podcast called Building Your Brand and teaches courses showing people how to create their own branding and GIFS if they don’t have the budget to outsource it.

KEY TAKEAWAYS COVERED IN THE PODCAST

Overcoming embarrassment and shame in personal and professional growth
The concept of "failing forward" and how it can help you learn from your mistakes and move forward quickly
Practical tips on how to pitch to be a guest on a podcast and what you need to consider

LINKS TO RESOURCES MENTIONED IN TODAY’S EPISODE
Connect with Liz on Instagram

Download Liz's Rejection Challenge Trello Template

Listen to Liz's podcast 'Building Your Brand'

Check out Liz's website

Connect with Teresa on Instagram, LinkedIn or Facebook

Transcript
Teresa: Hello and welcome to this week's episode of the Your Dream Business Podcast. How are you doing? So we are back with another interview. I don't know if I'm going to like bring back some solo ones. I will at some point. I just go with the flow and see how I feel. But at the moment, I'm really enjoying the interviews and I'm loving having some of these people on, which is awesome.

So today I have the very lovely Liz Mosley, who is a graphic designer with 15 years experience, and she now specializes in creating creative brands and animated GIFs for small business owners. She's also the host of a podcast called Building Your Brand and teaches courses, showing people how to create their own branding and GIFs.

It's a, there's an interesting story cause I was on her podcast, but we'll get to that later. Liz, welcome to the podcast.

Liz: Thanks for having me. It's nice to be here.

Teresa: My pleasure. So let's just start with the, I was on your podcast and you asked me to do something very unique on your podcast. Didn't you?

Liz: I know I really loved it and it was such a popular, popular episode, but yeah, I asked you to basically come on my podcast and coach me, which I think we were both a bit scared about cause you were scared that you would. You would coach me and everyone would be like, what's she even doing? And then I was scared that I, I have like a tendency to overshare.

So I was scared that I treated like a therapy session...

KEY TAKEAWAYS COVERED IN THE PODCAST

Download Liz's Rejection Challenge Trello Template

Listen to Liz's podcast 'Building Your Brand'

Check out Liz's website

Connect with Teresa on Instagram, LinkedIn or Facebook

It's a, there's an interesting story cause I was on her podcast, but we'll get to that later. Liz, welcome to the podcast.

Liz: Thanks for having me. It's nice to be here.

Teresa: My pleasure. So let's just start with the, I was on your podcast and you asked me to do something very unique on your podcast. Didn't you?

So I was scared that I treated like a therapy session and go a bit too far with what I was sharing.

Teresa: Never want to put the episode out.

Liz: I never want to put it out, but it, I, you know, it worked really well. And I think I had so many messages from people saying that they like really resonated with it because it was a more like personal, vulnerable, this is what I worry about.

And, you know, as usual, it was the sort of thing that everybody else worries about as well.

Teresa: Yeah. There's, you know, and the truth is, I don't think no matter what stage you're at in business or where you are, and even the people you look up to or the people that you aspire to be like, they're still dealing with the same sorts of things, maybe on a different scale, maybe with a different topic, but it all kind of boils down to something similar.

But it was, it was such a good episode, but it was a very nerve wracking one to go into because to just jump straight into a coaching call and like, coach someone. Like, yeah, because some, I guess some coaches or sometimes that I coach, I feel like I get to the end and I'm like, I'm not entirely sure what I've done here, if I've done anything, but you just don't know.

Liz: Well, and that's the thing is because you didn't know what I was, I mean, you had an idea of the sort of thing I was going to talk to, but you didn't know what I was going to bring to the table. And I think for coaching to work really well, that there is that dynamic where. The person receiving the coaching has to be open to being coached.

So it could have, it could definitely have gone horribly wrong. Yeah. But thankfully I did feel fairly confident because we have spoken before and I feel like we have the sort of rapport where actually like. we speak to each other really easily. You know, it's not like it was ever going to be a stunted or awkward conversation.

So I think it, yeah, it worked well.

Teresa: It was, it was really, really good. But, and, and you're so right with the, I think the emphasis is often put on the coach, which is rightly so because obviously you're paying them and, and, you know, if you're working with a coach, your expectation of them is high or should be high.

However, you're entirely right. If the person coming to be coached isn't willing to be coached, then it's a dead end. Like there's nothing the coach can do. I had to remind myself of this recently when I started working with someone new and I actually got a new know Biz Paul. I actually got on a call with Biz Paul and I was moaning about something to do with work and saying something was difficult.

And he's like, have you spoken to your coach about this? I was like, no. And he was like, isn't that their job? I realized that I wasn't being very vulnerable. And that is one of my problems is that I have this, you know, This show, not show that I put on, it's me, but there's this element of, I can't let my guard down because I'm the one who leads the conversations.

I'm the one. And interestingly enough, even as I was interviewing other coaches, because I have one coach that I've worked with for years and I love and she's amazing, but I needed something slightly different. From what she did and I was interviewing other coaches and I realized that they were getting on a call and I was taking the whole call.

Like I was leading it. I was driving it. I was the one filling the gaps. I was the one asking the questions. And I was like, this isn't what it should be. Like, you know, I've got to, but that was partly my fault. Partly their fault. Cause it was like, I've got to step back and go, okay, am I willing to be coached?

And am I willing to get vulnerable? And I have done now, I've got more vulnerable now, which is good, but it is very much a two way street. So, yeah.

Liz: I think the key thing though, is that, is you, well, A, having a good friend to point it out to you, but also having, like, you need to have the self awareness, don't you, that that is something that you're doing.

Cause you could have easily gone into that situation thinking, Oh no, I'm doing, I'm doing what I'm supposed to do. But actually like you need to like be able to recognize it so that then you can actually make a change so that it'll work for you.

Teresa: Yeah, absolutely. But no, it was really, really good fun. And your podcast, how many episodes have you done now?

Liz: I'm coming up to my 100th, which I'm really excited about.

Teresa: That's amazing. Have you got something exciting planned for your 100th?

Liz: Well, so I have a podcast editor and basically we've recorded an episode where she interviews me. So kind of what we did with yours, where she interviews me, kind of about like what my experience of the podcast, what I've learned, you know, kind of the lessons, the impact it's had on my business.

So yeah, hopefully that should be nice. And I think I'm going to do a gift, like a fun giveaway with like, like loads of the guests have like amazing physical products. And so I'm going to put together like a goodie box of things all from previous guests.

Teresa: That's so, so good. We had, I had Biz Paul interview me and my husband, Paul, because at the point he worked a lot in the business and also he came with me when I spoke and so episode 200, episode 100 and episode 200 are both me and Paul.

And then when it came to episode 300, he was like, you don't work in a business anymore, Paul. So you're not coming on. You've been on twice. That is enough. And people like him more than me. So I get jealous. But. Episode 300, I didn't actually do anything because I'd planned to do something, but the timing wasn't right.

And as it is, I still haven't done it. It will be coming. But yeah, so 300 is just a normal episode.

Liz: I can't believe you're over 300. That is mega.

Teresa: It's mad isn't it? Like.

Liz: I've got, I've got a funny story to tell you. So your husband does well on your podcast. The only episode that I have recorded that has never gone out on my podcast was with my husband.

Teresa: No, did you tell him? Is he completely gutted?

Liz: No, he was really relieved. It was like, I think I didn't prep him well enough, but basically, so he like, he does something that would have. The top, he like works in online education. So we were going to talk about online courses. It was like, perfect. Fitted really well, but he's in a much more sort of like corporate sphere to me.

And I don't think I sort of like briefed him on the sort of tone of the podcast. He doesn't listen to it, which frankly I think is rude. But then we basically were sat next to each other really closely with this one microphone. And it was, it was the most awkward conversation ever. I was like, yeah, that's.

I'm like, it's not going out. I can't. I can't.

Teresa: That is so good. That is awesome. You're the only one with you, my husband, sorry. And that is the thing. So when Biz Paul interviewed us first time, we were both, we were all in a recording studio. So that was much easier. The second time I think Paul and I did it just using my mic here.

And he is actually going to be recording another episode with me for something completely different, which we'll, we're going to go to Biz Paul's recording studio again to do it there because I just think like, it's that kind of. This is our home and we just huddled around like a pizza. It just seemed really odd.

Liz: Yeah, it was weird. Yeah, I think if I did it in a studio it might go a bit better, but it was really funny.

Teresa: And this is the thing, like he had a lot to say the first time and it was quite nice people getting to know him and getting to know me with him. But when, like he moved out, when he didn't move out of the business, he just got a real job, that meant he was not here and therefore couldn't help with the business.

I was like, yeah, you're kind of losing your point now, Paul. Sorry. I'm sure my audience would love to hear him back on. Anyway, anyway, so even though, so one of the reasons we met or how we met was through Adobe. So you and I are both, part of their, ambassador program. And Liz always does better than I do.

I'd like Liz is really good at doing the Adobe stuff. She's much higher on the leaderboard and I do get a bit competitive, not with Liz, just moving up the leaderboard a bit, but I just don't give it enough time, but your job naturally lends itself more.

Liz: Mine lends itself better to it, I think, than yours does.

And I'm already creating content like that, so it's sort of not that big a leap. Well, not that it's a leap for you, but it's just, we've got different audiences, haven't we? So it's just

Teresa: And your whole thing is talking about brand and branding and design, and so it fits perfectly. But we met through there.

However, today, we're not going to be talking about branding and things. We're going to be talking about a challenge that you did, which I just thought was brilliant. Tell us what the challenge was, Liz.

Liz: So I set myself a challenge to get a hundred rejections in my business. And I feel like I always need to caveat by saying in my business, because there's loads of people on TikTok going around trying to get a hundred rejections just in life.

So like going up to people in the street and asking them to like, sing duets with them and stuff. I was not doing that. Like that's not, that's not my vibe. So yeah, it was a hundred rejections in my business and like a whole story of how it came about. yeah. And I, well, I originally, I mean, I set myself Either to get to a hundred, to do it for six months, basically, my goal is to get to a hundred rejections in six months.

I massively failed. But that was sort of like part of the process. You know, it was an all in experiment.

Teresa: It's a good thing.

Liz: Yeah, it's a good thing, yeah.

Teresa: So, how come you started it?

Liz: So, I invited, so on a whim, about, it was just over a year ago now, I Had tagged someone, basically Christo, I tagged Christo in my, in a story, cause I'd just met him at Adobe Max and he replied, which was really nice of him.

And I thought, Oh, while he, like, if he's replied, then if I reply back, it's probably going to come up in his inbox, you know, rather than filtered off into that people you don't know inbox. And so I was like on a whim, I was like, I'm just going to ask him if he'd be on my podcast. So really impulsively, I asked him to be on my podcast and he sent me a really nice. A really polite message back, but basically asking how many downloads I used to get on my podcast and saying that when I got higher numbers to get back to him.

So basically saying no, which was, and it was very nice and friendly and polite, but I felt like really. My, I guess my reaction to it felt a bit over the top and I actually felt really embarrassed and a bit ashamed and a bit like, I had, you know, when you have that sinking feeling where you're suddenly like, I shouldn't have done that.

Teresa: Why did I do that?

Liz: Yeah, why did I do that? And I felt really embarrassed. And then I was, and then I could immediately sort of like, feel myself going into. Oh, I'm not going to do that again. You know, like I'm never going to ask anybody that's, you know, like too big, to be on my podcast again. And then like, I kind of didn't think anything of it.

I, you know, a few days later, I kind of like forgot about it. But then like a few months later, probably, I can't remember what, but something else will have happened. And it just set me up on this kind of like thought process of like, why am I reacting like this to these things? Because They don't, like, my reaction doesn't seem to match up to the very, like, polite, nice rejection that I've had that's not a big deal.

It's usually not anything about me, particularly. You know, it wasn't that he thought my podcast wasn't good. It wasn't that he thought anything was wrong with me. It was just that he was looking for a bigger audience to reach. And, you know, he probably gets invited onto loads. Anyway, so I just started this process of like, okay, hang on a second.

I can really see now that this is holding me back and it's stopping me go from things because my natural reaction is like self preservation and this doesn't feel nice. So my immediate reaction is like, I don't want to feel this again. So I'm not going to do this again. And so then I was like, okay, well this is not serving me well in my business at all because like, when I sort of take off, I think you've referred, you referred to this on our podcast episode on my podcast about the chimp brain.

And so it's like when I sort of can get myself out of the chimp brain and I think about it logically, actually, most of the times the rejections aren't really about me. If they are about me, then I probably wasn't the right fit for that thing anyway. So there's actually lots of other reasons why the rejection is valid, but I was making it all about me and all about what a story that I would then tell myself about me that was just effectively pretty self sabotagey.

So I was like, so I started to think about how I could change that. Like, what could I do that would change how I felt about rejection? And a friend of mine had done a similar challenge, like a few years previous. And I'd remembered like reading a blog post about it. She called it the no thank you challenge, which is much polite, like a much nicer way, a very friendly version of the rejection.

Teresa: Rejection. Rejection sounds so like. You're awful. Whereas someone went, oh, no, thank you. I'm good. It sounds so much nicer.

Liz: But I went all in with the rejections. But, yeah, and so I just decided that I would, I am the sort of person that loves challenges and this is why I do well in the Adobe Express thing, because they gamified it.

And I love, I love, I love gamifying anything. So like, give me a challenge and I'm, I'm on it. I'm gonna like work at it. And so I set myself this challenge. And honestly, the change was like immediate. So the minute I decided to do it, it was suddenly, I'd created a win win scenario for myself. So if someone said no, it was no longer this really negative thing.

It was helping me achieve my goal of getting a hundred challenges. So yeah, that was the challenge.

Teresa: I love it. So there's a couple of things I want to touch on. And obviously, you know, because we've spoken many times, this whole brain thing is my bag. So first off, for those of you listening, going, Oh my God, that's me.

I need to sort that. And what's wrong with me? There's nothing wrong with you. It is absolutely natural that we would feel like that, that we don't like, you know, one of our Maslow's hierarchy of needs. And weirdly, I've just interviewed someone else this morning and we put that came up as well. How very odd, you know, is that we're accepted and we're part of a community and someone rejecting us goes against that, which then makes us go, Oh my God, I'm not liked. I'm not part of this community and kicks huge fears into us.

So, so that in itself is absolutely fine. And the other thing that's interesting, although you said, and you're right from a business point of view, it's not helpful. There is always a reason why our brain, our nervous system, our Us are doing those things.

Our