Cures For The Nice Guy Syndrome - S2EPI - 154

In No More Mr. Nice Guy (2000) Robert Glover analyzes the personality and psychology of “nice guys”.
The core message is those nice guys aren’t really nice but are instead doormats who are nice out of fear of being assertive. Robert seeks to provide readers with advice and solutions to become a more assertive and higher-power man.

10 Traits of Nice Guys

Most people have one or two of these traits, but nice guys have most of them:

1.   Givers

2.   Caretaker

3.   Seek approval from others (especially from women)

4.   Conflict-avoidant

5.   Seek the right way to do things

6.   Try to be perfect and avoid mistakes (so people don’t think they’re bad)

7.   Repress their feelings

8.   Want to be different from their fathers

9.   They’re more comfortable being with women

10.   They exert tremendous effort to make their partners happy.

The Two Types of Nice Guys

There are two types of nice guys:

1.   Those who think they are bad and need to correct themselves

2.   Those who think they are so good, lie to themselves to keep their self-image.

The former had a troubled and rebellious childhood and now he feels like he needs to make up for it.
The latter was the good boy of the family and he stays that way to keep his social identity and his self-identity.

Glover recommends these steps to overcome the Mr. Nice Guy syndrome:

1.   Force yourself to enforce your boundaries

2.   Learn to please yourself first

3.   Cut porn and learn to have sex for the sake of it

4.   Face your fears

5.   Repeat positive mantras

6.   Eat well

7.   Do sport

8.   Spend more time with men

Nice guys cannot have intimate relationships.

Why?

Because intimate relationships require people to look within themselves and open up about who they really are.

But nice guys are always wearing a mask and always hiding their true selves. That makes their relationships unauthentic.

8 Steps to Overcome The “Mr. Nice Guy Syndrome” Nice Guys Don’t Have Intimate Relationships

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