LM1189 Word

LM1189 Word

LM, Episode 1189, 3/22/23, (Remaster Episode 90, 2/13/20) Word 

A few years ago, following a show in Detroit, two women hit on me.  This is a rare occurrence because my act is full of stories about my wife, Twyla, our children, and our grandson.  They ask if I want to accompany them to a bar.  I tell them, “Thank you, but I am going back to my hotel.”

“We could go to your hotel with you.”

“Yeah, I am sure Twyla would not approve of that”  

I couldn’t wait to tell Twyla.  She responds, “Did they not see your act?”

My routine after is a show is to go to my room for a couple of beers, listening to the recording of the show, and re-writing on the new stuff from that show, then, just before going to sleep at 1 or 2 am, I check Facebook to make sure our two grown children are still alive. 

That night Maggie had posted something political and a guy replied with something vile about women in general and Maggie in particular.  Maggie’s husband, Justin, her cousin, Jon, her brother and brother-in-laws had all jumped all over him, a couple even threatening him with violence.

I posted for this guy, “If you would spend less time trolling on Facebook, you could get a job and afford to move out of your mom’s basement.”  That was a mistake.  For the next hour my phone dinged every minute or two with this guy sending me private messages, the last one saying, “If you say one more word, I’m calling the police and having you arrested.”

This is stupid.  First of all, I think the Detroit police have bigger problems at 2 o’clock in the morning than settling an online dispute, but, secondly, I learned a long time ago on the playground at Shotwell School in Richmond, MO, when you stand up to a bully, they back down.  I reply, “Word.”

He responds, “I like you,” to which I tell him to do something to himself that is physically impossible. 

Today I want to encourage you, if you want to reduce your stress, reduce your time on social media.  Research shows it is addictive, it causes us anxiety, depression, and stress, plus, like that night in Detroit, it is a waste of your valuable time.

Thank you for listening and always remember laughter matters. .